spiritual counseling
Navigating Loneliness During the Holidays
The holiday season is traditionally portrayed as a time of togetherness, love, joy, and belonging. We are inundated with media images of families gathered around a festive table, friends celebrating, and communities coming together.
Paradoxically, for many people, this time of year is instead filled with feelings of loneliness, isolation and disconnection.
The root cause is the societal stereotype and cultural assumption that everyone should be joyful, happy, and surrounded by loved ones during the holidays. If you’re not, for whatever reason, it can lead to feelings of inadequacy, isolation, and social failure.
Holiday loneliness is exacerbated by the stark contrast between our actual circumstances and the commercially driven, idealized versions of holiday gatherings and celebrations we see in advertisements, television shows, movies, and social media. This increases feelings of disconnection, low self-esteem, and even depression.
Loneliness during the holidays can have a significant impact on mental health. Feelings of isolation and disconnection during this time of year can exacerbate existing mental health issues and lead to the development of new ones. The constant reminders of togetherness and joy, combined with a lack of social connections and meaningful interactions, can increase feelings of loneliness, leading to emotional distress, feelings of emptiness and hopelessness, and a decline in overall well-being.
Embrace Your Personal Power In Relationships
Our relationships have great power and influence in our lives. In particular, many of us spend countless hours pursuing love and romance. Then, once we are in a relationship, we spend even more time and energy thinking about it, confiding in friends about it…often trying to make the relationship different or better.
I deal with this almost daily as I have counseled hundreds of lovesick, frustrated, and heartbroken clients over the years.
“If only he would do what I want, things would be different,” some of my clients might say. “If only he would be more open and honest, maybe I could trust him more.” Truth be told, I have heard similar words come out of my own mouth about my own relationships more times than I care to admit!
Unfortunately, instead of successfully influencing our partner’s words or behavior, we are often left feeling disappointed, betrayed, frustrated, powerless, or out of control. It is draining, pointless, and definitely not the best use of one’s time and energy.
So how do we change it? How do we take emotional control of our life and our relationships? The answer is shockingly simple.
It is all about taking a different, broader perspective on relationships and what they are here to teach us. A quote from Unity Church’s Daily Word magazine perfectly captures this shift in perspective: “Through our relationships with one another, we express the power, presence and love of God.”
The Forgotten Art Of Self-Healing
Self-healing is a holistic approach to wellness that too often takes a back seat in our modern existence.
The mind-body has an incredible restorative and self-healing capacity that is often overlooked. Harnessing these inner forces can lead to a profound transformation of one’s life.
Self-healing is not just about recovering from physical ailments; it encompasses mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
It is the process of harnessing our body’s innate ability to recover from physical ailments and mental health challenges without relying solely on external intervention.
It’s about nurturing your body’s natural ability to rejuvenate, repair and thrive.
To achieve self-healing, it’s critical to recognize the mind-body connection. Our thoughts and emotions have a profound effect on our physical well-being. Negative thoughts and feelings such as stress, worry, anxiety, fear and resentment can all manifest as physical symptoms. Self-healing addresses these underlying emotional and mental issues to begin the healing process.
Remove Toxic People From Your Life
Have you ever had the presence of an emotional vampire in your life? This can happen in a love relationship, a friendship, or with a family member.
You will feel like your soul is being drained, you are not yourself. Your joy is gone when you are around them, you can’t be yourself. If all of this describes how you feel, then maybe it’s time to do some soul searching. Remember who you are and how important you are.
I have counseled so many people who are normally outgoing, loving, supportive, wonderful souls, but sometimes these folks are so giving that they give their power away. They forget to protect and take care of themselves.
Are there people in your life whose needs seem to be all that matters, but yours never do? Love is not love and friendship is not friendship if you have to put yourself aside on a daily basis in a relationship. We must constantly remind ourselves of this.
Sure, relationships are give and take, but when they seem to be only take and take and there is no giving, something is wrong.
Who we surround ourselves with, who we give our time to, greatly affect the quality of our lives and our spirit. If you suspect that someone is a toxic person, do not be afraid to set boundaries and make changes in your life.
You deserve to feel nothing less than wonderful and lovable, as God, Source, Spirit, the Divine intended you to be. Do not let fear make you settle for less than what you are worth.
Free Yourself From An Unhealthy Relationship
An intimate relationship or marriage is meant to be a safe space. Your partner or spouse is supposed to be the closest person in your life. They should be the one person you are able to trust unconditionally with the most important aspects of your life.
If you are currently in a challenging relationship, you need to ask yourself if this union has all the key traits for a healthy, happy relationship. Do you feel secure, safe, and supported? More importantly, do you feel loved and valued?
If not, are you hoping it will somehow work eventually, and develop into something that will offer you more of what you need and deserve?
These are vital questions to ask yourself, not only before you commit to someone, but also throughout the relationship. All relationships evolve over time as people change and grow.
Just because everything was great during the initial ‘honeymoon’ phase of a relationship, does not guarantee it will remain that way. A healthy relationship continues to grow and evolve, as both partners grown and evolve.
I have worked with many clients over the years who settled for less, or got caught up in the downward spiral of a dysfunctional, toxic relationship. Saying “I love you” does not mean much if it is not backed up by matching actions and behavior.
Seven Powerful Ways To Attract True Love
For the metaphysically aware single person there are powerful, tried-and-tested ways to create, attract and manifest romantic love. Many of my clients have attracted their life mate using these techniques, and it has also helped some of my single friends to find love and romance.
The following are ways to open up and allow your heart to connect with someone who is your vibrational love match.
Alignment. First, you need to understand that we cannot attract anyone or anything into our life unless we are on the same frequency with that person or thing. We need to align our energy vibration with that which we are hoping to attract. Attuning ourselves to what we feel worthy of manifesting is key.
Higher Vibration. We also need to raise our vibration to a level of consciousness where we are consistently in greater alignment with the energies of unconditional love, compassion, kindness, tolerance, patience, gratitude, peace and joy. Why? Because true, long-lasting love of the ‘soulmate’ variety is found in these higher realms of vibration.
Non-Resistance. An important ingredient is to not create resistance by being too intensely attached to the outcome. If we put too much focus or emphasis on our intentions and goals, we create resistance. God, Source, Spirit, the Divine wants all of us to experience happiness and fulfillment, and live our best life. But if we want something too badly, we delay or deflect it from coming into our life. Being overly attached creates self-defeating energy roadblocks.
The Messenger Must Know When To Hold Her Peace
Ever heard of “less is more?” Well, there is a lot of spiritual truth in the saying. It is especially valid in this day and age, where everyone seems to have preconceived ideas and strong opinions on just about everything. Sometimes saying less, or even saying nothing at all, is enough, and usually for the best.
Saying nothing can be very empowering and liberating. We have free will to choose how we want to spend our time and energy. I choose to focus on things that are for my highest good, and those I care about.
It is not our duty to correct every misinformed opinion or ignorant viewpoint we encounter. Does that mean we should be self-absorbed and uncaring? No, certainly not. But we can also not make the world a better place by wasting our precious time and energy trying to fix everyone, and correct everything, while our own inner peace and well-being suffers.
Compassion, charity, and kindness are all much needed in the world today, but not if it is constantly at our own expense. I therefore prefer to wisely pick my battles, and stick to my lane. One person cannot be everything for everyone. We must focus on our own unique strengths and capabilities when helping others.
If we randomly go out on a limb to help everyone with advice and support, it is often not appreciated and frequently met with negativity and resistance. Not to mention trying to point out the facts or truth of a matter, which can be very risky these days! There are some things in life people just need to figure out for themselves. They don’t always need to hear it from us.