pain
Embracing The Shadow Within
When I first began to intentionally and consciously walk a spiritual path, I remember doing so because it just felt so right. Every step I took toward ‘enlightenment’ in this lifetime seemed to bring more brightness into my life, and so many more blessings.
In those early days I was really rolling! I was expecting this to be an easy ride – all joy and light and love. It was wonderful.
What I hadn’t expected was the inevitable emergence of my shadow through as a result of all my spiritual work. And it was not something I was going to be comfortable with – admitting I had places of darkness within me, unloved aspects of myself, disowned pieces of my soul which had been abandoned and in such pain.
Through a series of, what seemed like, unfortunate events, I was given opportunities to face my shadow side. Challenges in relationships with friends and loved ones arose. I couldn’t understand it at first, and felt very alone and misunderstood. I was shifting the blame for this onto the people around me, instead of going inward.
Going inward, into the light, was totally okay, but going inward into the darkness was terrifying. My ego-self raised every defense to keep me from going there. Eventually, I could avoid it no longer.
My life at this point had endured tremendous change in the course of only a few years- so much so, that the entire landscape of my existence and the people in it were now different. While many of the changes were positive, the magnitude of the differences between my ‘old life’ and my ‘new life’ forced me into robust self-reflection.
The Divine Path Back To Unconditional Love
Recently, I was meditating on a deeply personal situation — one that stirred up waves of anger and resentment, even bordering on hatred and bitterness. Then I received an insight from spirit that stopped me in my tracks. It was one of those profound moments when time stands still and sacred truth illuminates your heart.
“Never forget the Golden Rule,” spirit said. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Do not do to others what you do not want done to you. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
Suddenly I realized that the deeper truth of holding unconditional love in your heart. It’s a universal spiritual principle because it works both ways! You would never, ever want the same hatred or anger that you direct at others, to be directed at you.
Now let me be honest. My anger this time wasn’t just outward to others. It also turned inward. It was a growing dark, toxic presence in my heart and mind.
Life has been hard lately. Too many people I know have died far too young. Watching my beloved partner in a so-called “medical facility” that should not be allowed to take care of anyone, especially our elders. Almost losing him. Being emotionally and financially drained by someone I trusted. The exhausting noise of political chaos.
It has been one thing after another, piling up until I reached a boiling point. I began to ask the big, painful question: Why? Why all this suffering? Why now? Why me? And I wasn’t just angry at the world — I was angry at myself. Angry at Source, Spirit, God. Angry at the seeming cruelty of it all.
What The Mind Believes, The Body Perceives
Self-talk and inner dialogue play a crucial role in our overall well-being – body, mind and spirit. The way we think and talk to ourselves shapes our reality, affecting not only our emotions and moods, but also our physical health.
For example, if we wake up and immediately think, “I feel terrible. I’m still exhausted. I don’t want to face the day,” our body will respond in kind. We’ll move sluggishly, feel each ache more intensely, and reinforce a state of fatigue.
Negative self-talk can even affect digestion, metabolism, and immune function because the body takes its cues from the mind. When we repeatedly tell ourselves that we lack energy, the body responds by slowing down.
However, when we consciously shift our thoughts to a more positive perspective, we cultivate an inner environment that supports healing, resilience, and vitality.
The same principle applies to how we perceive ourselves physically. If we stand in front of the mirror and focus on perceived flaws, our posture and energy will reflect that self-criticism. We may unconsciously choose clothing that reinforces our negative self-image and move through the day with slumped shoulders and diminished confidence. Our bodies reflect the beliefs we hold about ourselves.
Conversely, when we practice self-talk that is uplifting and empowering, our body responds accordingly. By consciously choosing to carry ourselves with confidence, even if it feels unnatural at first, we initiate a shift in both our emotional and physical states.
Coping With The Loss Of A Loved One
The loss of a loved one is one of the most profound and challenging experiences we can have. Even if we have a deep spiritual belief that our loved one has crossed over into the spirit realm free of pain and suffering, the grief of their physical absence remains.
It is natural to mourn their departure, to feel the sting of their absence in our daily lives, and to struggle with the reality of a world that feels less complete without them.
For those who have lost a parent, this grief can bring an added layer of vulnerability. Regardless of our age, the loss of a mother or father can leave us feeling untethered, with a foundation in life that once provided security and guidance now shaken. Even if we have spent years caring for them through illness or decline, their passing can still leave us feeling profoundly alone.
This transition marks a significant shift, not only in our outer reality, but also in our inner identity. And yet, in the depths of grief, there is an opportunity for deep reflection, gratitude, and connection.
One of the most powerful ways to navigate grief is to focus on gratitude for the connection you shared with your loved one. Their love, wisdom, and presence shaped you in countless ways, and that influence does not disappear with their passing. Celebrate their life with vigor. Share their stories, embrace cherished memories, and allow their laughter to echo through your heart.
Everything Happens For A Reason
Challenges, setbacks and disappointments are inevitable in life. Sometimes it can even feel like the entire universe is conspiring against us!
But this perspective is an illusion born of our human experience. Spirit doesn’t desire our failure or suffering. Instead, it seeks to lead us to joy, abundance, and fulfillment.
Many of us, however, fall into the habit of blaming God, Spirit, the Universe, or others for the hardships we face. But to truly grow, we must change this mindset. Instead of dwelling on blame, it’s important to examine the lessons hidden in each challenge. By asking why these situations arose and what we can learn from them, we transform pain into wisdom and setbacks into stepping stones.
Consider the heartache of losing a long-term partner. You may have built a life together – marriage, children, shared dreams – only to wake up one day to abandonment. Questions arise: Why did this happen? What could I have done differently?
It’s important to realize that in most cases these events are not your fault. Free will governs each person’s choices. While her decision to leave may hurt you deeply, it is a reflection of her own path, not your worth. Self-doubt often creeps in, especially for women, as thoughts of inadequacy arise. But self-esteem cannot come from others-it must come from within.
Instead of focusing on what you could have done, consider this: their departure may have been necessary for your growth. Spirit often removes people from our lives to make room for greater blessings. In hindsight, you may realize that staying with that person would have hindered your potential or delayed the arrival of something better.
Not Everyone Chooses The Path Of Healing
You’ve probably heard the phrase “what they don’t know can’t hurt them.” Sometimes this is true, but there are also times when what people choose to ignore or disregard can cause real harm – not only to themselves, but also to those around them.
For those of us with psychic or spiritual gifts, there’s an added complexity: the ability to sense the struggles of others, which leads to the question of when and how to help.
Intuitives, channelers and healers are very aware of the energy of others, even when we’re just going about our daily routines. Whether it’s a stranger in the grocery store or a friend across the room, we tend to sense when someone is struggling with grief, trauma or stress.
We may choose to quietly send them comforting or healing energy, hoping it will ease their pain, even if only for a moment, yet the urge to help can be very strong in these situations. And while reaching out and offering help can be very uplifting or rewarding for everyone involved, there are times when our attempts to help are met with resistance, or worse, denial.
It’s especially challenging to see someone we care about turn a blind eye to their own needs or pain, and even more so when our support is disregarded or unappreciated.
One of the hardest lessons I have had to learn in both my personal and professional life is that I can only help those who are willing to help themselves. The sad truth is that sometimes people choose not to act on information that could improve their lives or change their destiny. Instead, their negativity, anger, or fear allows the problem to fester or the behavior to grow, affecting not only themselves but also their loved ones. Over time, this denial creates a cycle of suffering that affects physical, mental and karmic health and well-being, sometimes for generations.
Karmic Healing: Can You Handle The Truth?
In the famous courtroom drama A Few Good Men, Jack Nicholson’s character, Colonel Jessup, exclaims in an iconic movie moment, “You can’t handle the truth!”
I suspect this scene has become legendary in movie history because it resonates so deeply with most people. On some level, many of us sometimes struggle to face the truth about ourselves and our lives.
Whether it’s difficult memories, unhealed wounds, failed relationships, or unspoken regrets, facing our truth can be challenging, even traumatic or overwhelming.
Yet, from a spiritual perspective, facing and owning our truth is one of the most powerful steps we can take on our path to karmic healing and soul growth.
Our soul journey is a karmic balancing act in which the energy we put out into the world eventually comes back to us. When we hide from our truth – whether through denial, justification or avoidance – we accumulate karmic debt.
Like a heavy boulder that we carrry around, karmic debt hinders our soul growth and spiritual progress. On the other hand, when we consciously choose to face our truth, we release this burden and open ourselves to healing, growth, fulfillment and inner peace.
Denial is our most common response to unpleasant truths. We tend to avoid acknowledging aspects of ourselves that we find unattractive, justify our negative behaviors, and make excuses for our bad choices and failures in order to protect our fragile human egos. However, these “untruths” build up over time. By avoiding them, we create layers of illusion that distance us from who we really are and cloud our understanding of our soul purpose and the divine spark within.