growth
The Magicless Misery Of ‘Compare And Despair’
I once attended a Toastmasters meeting where a gentleman was delivering his first speech to this specific group. It was an ice breaker to have us get acquainted with him. Instead of the typical short autobiographical introduction this speaker chose to give us an overview of his philosophy of life.
He told his audience that he sees himself entering a new phase of his life right now. He spoke about how important it is to get to know yourself and to take care of yourself first and foremost, and to always live in the moment.
After the speech and applause, the toastmaster reflected briefly on what the talk meant to him as he had listened. He said it reminded him of a mentor who had once, many years ago, said to him, “Compare… and despair”. If in life you are constantly comparing yourself to others, or comparing what you have with what others have, or what you feel you lack, or need to achieve, then all that will do is bring yourself unnecessary despair.
The only thing you should ever compare yourself against, his mentor added, is yesterday. Today did you do something constructive or grow in some way that makes you a better person than you were yesterday?
Too often we compare ourselves with our peers, both in our personal and professional lives. Why did he get a raise and not me? Why can I not find a soulmate like she did? Why can’t I be a successful entrepreneur like him? How come they get to have all these wonderful vacations?
The Simple Secret To Building Real Confidence
Building your confidence can feel vague or out of reach, like something you’re supposed to just know how to do, but often we don’t.
The typical advice is to do affirmations, spoken aloud or posted around your home, along with journaling and gratitude practices.
While these practices can help us cultivate things like intuitive awareness, inner peace or emotional balance, they aren’t always the most effective confidence builders.
There is one essential step we must take if we want to build genuine, lasting confidence. That step is action.
It’s easy to wait for confidence to arrive like a bolt of lightning, expecting it to empower us and prepare us to finally walk the empowered path of our dreams.
But the reality is that confidence doesn’t simply appear before the journey begins. It actually grows as we move forward.
Taking action can feel intimidating. You may not feel ready. You might believe you need more time, more clarity, or more skills. But readiness doesn’t magically arrive.
Change begins when we choose to take action, even if it’s imperfect. Manifestation requires more than thought and feeling. It calls for aligned, inspired action.
Are You Experiencing A Spiritual Awakening?
As a psychic reader, I sometimes have clients who quietly confess that they are afraid they might be “going crazy.”
In truth, they are usyally just experiencing the early signs of a spiritual awakening. These profound shifts in your awareness and energy can feel disorienting, yet are deeply meaningful.
So, how can you tell if what you’re feeling is part of a spiritual transformation rather than a personal unraveling?
The term ‘spiritual awakening’ is somewhat overused these days in metaphysical circles. Just about anyone who has a ‘woo-woo’ moment, or gains deeper insight into a situation, or suddenly sees chakra colors, seems to believe they are having a true, full-blown ‘spiritual awakening.’
Spiritual awakening does tend to occur spontaneously, and from what I’ve witnessed, the more open-minded the person is and the less attached to outcomes they are, the more available or ‘ripe’ they are for a spiritual awakening to occur.
Just the other day a client was telling me of her experience while peeling a carrot over the kitchen sink. She said she was looking down at her hands, watching them, and wondering what was animating them?
It can be a strange moment when you discover that you are not really who you thought you were. It can be disorienting, to say the least, to see yourself from such an objective position. However, if you know ahead of time that this is perfectly normal, and others have experienced these signs too, it can make your life a lot easier.
False Education Appearing Real (F.E.A.R)
I love the acronym F.E.A.R. (False Education Appearing Real) since we all have people, circumstances, phobias and so forth, that can put us into that space.
Fear is an instance of emotion that is triggered by the awareness, or anticipation of danger. It can also become a state of being. Excluding clinical fears, needing professional help, there are many fears we simply impose upon ourselves as a result of life experiences.
One of my fears is acrophobia, the fear of heights. When I get within five feet from the edge of a rooftop, I begin to shake.
Climbing 30 foot ladders has me nervous and when I hiked to the pinnacle of the mountain of Macchu Picchu in 2004, I could not take those last six nervous steps onto the plateau pinnacle rock. This was partly being due to a few other tourists already sharing the rock… and I am a little “accident prone.”
Although I was invited by my partner and the guide, I leaned against the rock debating my fear, shaking a little at the prospect and wishing that I could take those final steps, as I might regret it after I hiked down. Part of me did regret not taking those last steps when we got back to the base.
Yet, a bigger part of me knew I had to acknowledge the feelings in the moment, and since I am not a regular exerciser, I already had accomplished something tremendous by taking the hike to the top and back down the back side of the mountain. On the way I enjoyed the magnificent views and spiritual energy for several hours. Continue reading
What Makes A Spiritual Group Truly Work
We are all different. Each person is a piece of the puzzle that creates a group. All people are raised different. People may have different spiritual beliefs, different educational backgrounds, jobs, nationalities.
Yet, if the common goal is the same, there is no reason why we cannot achieve much more in our world. Some of us simply need to find a way to respect diversity.
Spiritual groups tend to be the especially challenging when it comes to diversity. Too often spiritually-minded people are expected to always agree with everyone about everything, in order to promote goodwill among group members and keep the peace.
But in any group people have to learn how to agree to disagree. It’s always okay to have your own opinion and express how you feel. One must just remember that not all of the group may agree with your thoughts.
In groups people all choose different roles, and the roles may change over time. Most groups have that one person that assumes the role of leader. The leader of the group is often selected by the majority. The leadership role usually fits the personality and consciousness of that individual, as do the other roles in the group.
The leader is usually a person that is able to communicate well with team members and good at listening to people. The ‘worker bees’ are usually good at taking direction and accomplishing the task at hand. Somewhere in the middle are the people that come up with ideas and can present them to the group, and help the suggestions come to fruition.
How To Be Mindful On The Go!
To some individuals, being mindful while on the go might seem a contradiction in itself. However, the truth of the matter is that there are a plethora of ways to cultivate the art of mindfulness that do not involve simply sitting still.
People turn to mindfulness for many reasons. For example, they may have a medical condition that needs managing, work issues that require resolving, or just simply want to feel more present in their everyday lives.
With the pace of modern life, it is clear to see why people become easily distracted and lead somewhat complicated lives as a result – all of which can be both emotionally and physically draining.
Whatever the reasons may be as to why a person turns to mindfulness, it should, indeed, help them to create a more balanced lifestyle.
That said, mindfulness should not be seen as a magical cure-all, but more an efficient way of relating to personal issues differently.
Interestingly, research has revealed that physiological changes do actually take place within an individual practicing mindfulness meditation. Such changes occur within the brain and some people experience better blood pressure and an enhanced immune system.
The above said, even those among us who practice mindfulness faithfully, can find it somewhat challenging to take what we have learned and incorporate it into our everyday lives. Instead, we tend to allow ourselves to be distracted and develop automatic behavior patterns instead.
The Soul Wisdom Of The Major Arcana
If you’ve ever felt a magnetic pull toward the Tarot, you’re not alone. For centuries, these cards have been used to unlock the mysteries of our life journey and soul path. Among the 78 cards in a traditional Tarot deck, there are 22 that stand out in their spiritual depth and archetypal wisdom: the Major Arcana.
The word “arcana” comes from the Latin arcanum, meaning “secret” or “mystery.” These 22 cards, beginning with The Fool and culminating with The World, chart a symbolic journey of spiritual awakening and self-discovery.
In readings, Major Arcana cards often speak to life-changing lessons and soul-level growth. These archetypal cards form the backbone of the Tarot, guiding seekers on their journey of self-realization and spiritual refinement, known as The Fool’s Journey.
When several Major Arcana cards appear in a spread, I often sense that the querent (person receiving the reading) is going through a spiritually significant phase. These cards highlight soul contracts, karmic patterns, and transformative life events. They encourage us to pause, reflect, and connect with our higher self.
In contrast, the remaining 56 cards — known as the Minor Arcana — deal more with the day-to-day. They are divided into four suits representing the elements (Cups, Pentacles, Swords, and Wands) and include numbered cards and Court Cards, often called the “people cards.” When many Minor Arcana cards show up, the reading tends to focus on practical matters, offering insight and advice for navigating everyday challenges and choices.