life lessons
The Magicless Misery Of ‘Compare And Despair’
I once attended a Toastmasters meeting where a gentleman was delivering his first speech to this specific group. It was an ice breaker to have us get acquainted with him. Instead of the typical short autobiographical introduction this speaker chose to give us an overview of his philosophy of life.
He told his audience that he sees himself entering a new phase of his life right now. He spoke about how important it is to get to know yourself and to take care of yourself first and foremost, and to always live in the moment.
After the speech and applause, the toastmaster reflected briefly on what the talk meant to him as he had listened. He said it reminded him of a mentor who had once, many years ago, said to him, “Compare… and despair”. If in life you are constantly comparing yourself to others, or comparing what you have with what others have, or what you feel you lack, or need to achieve, then all that will do is bring yourself unnecessary despair.
The only thing you should ever compare yourself against, his mentor added, is yesterday. Today did you do something constructive or grow in some way that makes you a better person than you were yesterday?
Too often we compare ourselves with our peers, both in our personal and professional lives. Why did he get a raise and not me? Why can I not find a soulmate like she did? Why can’t I be a successful entrepreneur like him? How come they get to have all these wonderful vacations?
The Simple Secret To Building Real Confidence
Building your confidence can feel vague or out of reach, like something you’re supposed to just know how to do, but often we don’t.
The typical advice is to do affirmations, spoken aloud or posted around your home, along with journaling and gratitude practices.
While these practices can help us cultivate things like intuitive awareness, inner peace or emotional balance, they aren’t always the most effective confidence builders.
There is one essential step we must take if we want to build genuine, lasting confidence. That step is action.
It’s easy to wait for confidence to arrive like a bolt of lightning, expecting it to empower us and prepare us to finally walk the empowered path of our dreams.
But the reality is that confidence doesn’t simply appear before the journey begins. It actually grows as we move forward.
Taking action can feel intimidating. You may not feel ready. You might believe you need more time, more clarity, or more skills. But readiness doesn’t magically arrive.
Change begins when we choose to take action, even if it’s imperfect. Manifestation requires more than thought and feeling. It calls for aligned, inspired action.
Trusting Spirit’s Guidance During Life Transitions
When life knocks you down, when things don’t go your way, when your dreams begin to feel like nightmares, don’t fall into the trap of believing it will never get better. Your life is not over.
Challenges like these are often small nudges from the universe, guiding you to face a new direction, to try something different, and to move forward. It’s a chance to release your past and forgive those who played a part in your pain.
Our angels, guides and ancestors are with us always. They feel our sorrow, and they celebrate our joy. They gently guide us toward the right path, but we don’t always hear that quiet inner whisper.
Our spirit allies will always try to intervene when something threatens us that isn’t meant to be part of our journey. Still, the choice to listen is always ours. When we ignore their guidance, we often find ourselves veering off course.
We’ve all done this. I know I have. In 2008, I was receiving clear messages to slow down and walk away from a job that was draining me emotionally and spiritually. But I resisted. I didn’t know how I would pay my bills if I left.
For months, my guides urged me to let go and move on. Eventually, I did. I quit. I had no idea how I was going to survive financially, but I knew I couldn’t stay any longer for the sake of my well-being. It took every ounce of courage I had, but I finally left.
False Education Appearing Real (F.E.A.R)
I love the acronym F.E.A.R. (False Education Appearing Real) since we all have people, circumstances, phobias and so forth, that can put us into that space.
Fear is an instance of emotion that is triggered by the awareness, or anticipation of danger. It can also become a state of being. Excluding clinical fears, needing professional help, there are many fears we simply impose upon ourselves as a result of life experiences.
One of my fears is acrophobia, the fear of heights. When I get within five feet from the edge of a rooftop, I begin to shake.
Climbing 30 foot ladders has me nervous and when I hiked to the pinnacle of the mountain of Macchu Picchu in 2004, I could not take those last six nervous steps onto the plateau pinnacle rock. This was partly being due to a few other tourists already sharing the rock… and I am a little “accident prone.”
Although I was invited by my partner and the guide, I leaned against the rock debating my fear, shaking a little at the prospect and wishing that I could take those final steps, as I might regret it after I hiked down. Part of me did regret not taking those last steps when we got back to the base.
Yet, a bigger part of me knew I had to acknowledge the feelings in the moment, and since I am not a regular exerciser, I already had accomplished something tremendous by taking the hike to the top and back down the back side of the mountain. On the way I enjoyed the magnificent views and spiritual energy for several hours. Continue reading
What Makes A Spiritual Group Truly Work
We are all different. Each person is a piece of the puzzle that creates a group. All people are raised different. People may have different spiritual beliefs, different educational backgrounds, jobs, nationalities.
Yet, if the common goal is the same, there is no reason why we cannot achieve much more in our world. Some of us simply need to find a way to respect diversity.
Spiritual groups tend to be the especially challenging when it comes to diversity. Too often spiritually-minded people are expected to always agree with everyone about everything, in order to promote goodwill among group members and keep the peace.
But in any group people have to learn how to agree to disagree. It’s always okay to have your own opinion and express how you feel. One must just remember that not all of the group may agree with your thoughts.
In groups people all choose different roles, and the roles may change over time. Most groups have that one person that assumes the role of leader. The leader of the group is often selected by the majority. The leadership role usually fits the personality and consciousness of that individual, as do the other roles in the group.
The leader is usually a person that is able to communicate well with team members and good at listening to people. The ‘worker bees’ are usually good at taking direction and accomplishing the task at hand. Somewhere in the middle are the people that come up with ideas and can present them to the group, and help the suggestions come to fruition.
My Childhood Psychic Awakening
Being gifted from an early age, I had lots of questions, and wanted specific, detailed answers about psychic phenomena, spirituality and the mystical. This later became my norm to everything, and the world around me. The why’s and how’s continue to fascinate me in every aspect of my life.
My spirit guides have been very helpful over the years, as I found that humans can seldom answer my questions clearly, nor adequately. Over the years, my guides provided me with the stepping stones for my personal psychic development.
My guides assured me early on that they would never give me more than I could handle. They also made it clear that the truth of anything can always be confirmed by simply asking. I believed them, and each time I had an unusual sense or feeling, I asked for confirmation. I still do.
My first paranormal encounters and psychic experiences were with the animals. Their energy and communication is easier to understand, just like my guides, and they always communicate with unconditional love.
This also led to a special bond with nature, and especially the trees. Soon after came the wind, and the water, their sounds so soothing and calm. As a child, I always experienced a deep, tranquil feeling of well-being, serenity and inner peace whenever I was outside in nature. I still do.
My next extra-sensory experiences were of premonitions and forebodings concerning the safety and well-being of others. At such a young age these presentiments were tricky to relay to adults.
Walking In Faith Through Life’s Ups And Downs
Most of us go through life like it is a roller coaster ride. We have our ups and downs, our good days and our hard ones. Sometimes we catch ourselves saying things we probably shouldn’t, or reaching for that chocolate chip cookie even though we promised ourselves we wouldn’t.
Temptation is everywhere. That little voice in our head tells us to go for it, even when our gut or intuition says it’s not a good idea. It can leave us feeling torn and unsure of what the right choice really is.
And then, on top of all our personal ups and downs, there’s everything going on in the world around us. Lately, it feels like we’re living through constant upheaval: wars, natural disasters, political division, economic stress, runaway technology, and so much uncertainty about the future. All of it adds to the pressure we already carry.
It’s no wonder we feel overwhelmed or tempted to numb ourselves with distractions. When everything feels unstable, it’s easy to lose our sense of direction or forget the spiritual tools that keep us grounded.
That’s why staying connected to faith, however that looks for you, is more important than ever. It becomes an anchor in the storm, something solid to hold onto when everything else feels like it’s shifting.
Faith helps us pause, speak with care, and make better choices. It gives us insight and direction. When we turn away from it or get stuck in negative thinking, that’s usually when life starts feeling harder and more complicated.