self-love
What To Do When A Lost Love Lingers
Many of the readings I do are about love and relationships, and a good percentage of them are about past relationships that continue to linger in the hearts and minds of some callers.
For some people there are often constant, even obsessive thoughts about a former partner, a longing for a second chance, or bitterness and regret for time and energy that now seems wasted. The longer and more intense the relationship, the more battle scars and wounds there often are.
If it was a soulmate or twinflame connection, the aftermath can be especially devastating. The relationship has ended and the connection has been severed in this lifetime. This can be very painful. You know you gave it your all. You hung in there for years, or you made heroic efforts to ensure the survival of the relationship, but it did not work out as you had hoped.
If you are highly sensitive and intuitively aware, you may still be picking up the energy of your former partner, which can be very painful, disturbing and disruptive. Unresolved energetic connections can keep you stuck in a repetitive cycle of repeating the same pattern with that person, or put you on hold, unable to move forward in peace and confidence.
I am often asked, “Is it really over?” or “Does he still have feelings for me?” Of course, the answer depends on the unique circumstances.
The Cautionary Tale Of The Lovestruck Witch
Once upon a time, there was a goodly witch named Wanda. Though she sometimes had a fiery temper, her heart was generally in the right place.
For many years, Wanda lived a cozy life with her partner, Colwyn the Brave, in a happy and fulfilling relationship.
But one day, out of the blue, Colwyn announced that he was ending the relationship. Although he still loved Wanda, he explained that he no longer had the romantic or emotional feelings necessary to sustain the relationship.
But Wanda was no fool. Fee-fi-fo-fum, she knew by the prick of her thumb…that he was lying through his teeth! The truth was that he had decided to dump her for her so-called best friend, Suvanna the Enchantress.
Wanda was devastated. She had dedicated more than two decades of her life to this man, standing by him through thick and thin. And her friend’s betrayal only added further insult to injury.
Realizing the extent of the pain he had caused, Colwyn tried to comfort Wanda, assuring her that one day she would meet someone who would make her much happier than he ever had.
But his words fell on deaf ears. Wanda was heartbroken and very, very angry.
Then she remembered…she was a witch. She could make things happen, especially with the help of her sisterhood of witches.
New Year, New Habits, And A New You!
Many people make resolutions every year that are never kept. They make a sincere effort for a month or so, and then it just slips here and there until whatever they decided to do just falls by the wayside. This is normal, and you should never beat yourself up if you make a resolution or promise and don’t follow through. Growth is a process, not a straight line.
When I decide to do something, the first thing I do is meditate on it. I ask my guides and angels, “Is this right for me? Will this improve my life? If I don’t do this, will it hurt me or someone else? If the answers are yes, yes, and no, then I know it’s the right thing for me to do.
I do not reserve this for New Year’s resolutions. I do this throughout the year whenever I feel spiritual growth within myself or experience something that sparks change, whether positive or negative. A new year can begin any day you decide to change some aspect of your life. It doesn’t have to be January 1st; it can be any day.
Personally, I make a new “resolution” each month. At the end of each month, I reflect and ask myself if I’ve accomplished what I set out to do. If not, I set it aside and move on to something new. Eventually, I return to the unfulfilled goal, knowing that the timing wasn’t right. I don’t beat myself up about unfinished goals; instead, I send them love and leave them for later.
My most important resolution is to get closer to Spirit. I strive to understand what Spirit has in store for me and to guide me to become the best version of myself from the inside out. The outward appearance can be dressed up or down, but the true self must be healed, clear, and joyful. That joy doesn’t come from another person or thing – it comes from loving myself as it should be for you. Love yourself as you are in this moment, and nurture the new version of yourself with daily love, meditation, and surrender to your higher self.
Reclaim Your Peace And Power With Healthy Boundaries
Saying “no” is one of the most powerful things we can do to maintain our personal and spiritual well-being and energetic balance.
Many of us are caught up in the daily whirlwind of commitments, expectations, and the constant need to meet the demands of others. For those on a spiritual or esoteric path, this can be especially challenging.
The desire to be compassionate and supportive can sometimes blur the lines between compassion and self-neglect. However, one of the most profound spiritual lessons is this: it is okay to say no. In fact, it is imperative!
Knowing when and how to say no is a critical self-care skill that allows you to set healthy boundaries and protect your time, energy, and mental health. Moreover, it is crucial for our spiritual growth and essential for living a life filled with purpose and fulfillment.
Saying no and standing your ground requires recognizing your inherent worth and honoring your personal limits. Too often we stretch ourselves too thin, trying to be all things to all people. This may come from a fear of disappointing others or a belief that our value is in how much we give. Many of us also feel spiritually obligated to be there for others, often because we are so deeply affected by all the struggles and suffering we see in the world around us.
However, when we put the needs of others ahead of our own without balance, we risk depleting our physical, emotional, and spiritual energy. In such a depleted state, we are of no use to anyone.
Why You Need To Be Honest With Yourself
As a professional psychic, I frequently see clients stuck in unfulfilling relationships or careers, yearning for a deeper sense of happiness and purpose. Many of these individuals are forced to navigate a societal norm that encourages them to settle for less than what they deserve.
Furthermore, many of us were taught to avoid confronting our problems. This is wrong. We must face the root causes head-on, choosing temporary distractions over them.
This approach may provide a brief sense of comfort, but it is ultimately a futile attempt to perpetuate cycles of dissatisfaction. If you find yourself at a crossroads—questioning a toxic relationship, a stagnant career, or an unfulfilling life path—it is time for a transformative shift. The journey begins with radical honesty.
We must be brutally honest with ourselves. This is not self-criticism. It is self-love. Spiritually empowered people take responsibility for what they can change and refuse to make excuses. When we do this, we empower ourselves to move toward a more authentic, fulfilling life.
Denial and a lack of self-love are holding you back. The truth is our liberator. It shows us the way to greener pastures and a higher vibrational frequency.
Facing your inner truth is uncomfortable. Get over it. Embrace the temporary disruptions of change. It often demands that you release relationships, habits, or patterns that no longer serve your highest good. These shifts might initially feel like losses, but they are blessings in disguise. Each adjustment creates space for new, more aligned opportunities to manifest in your life.
The Spiritual Wisdom Of Butterflies
My grandmother was a poet. When I was a child, she wrote a beautiful poem about me. It was about a fairy girl who spent all her time outside chasing butterflies. The poem had a poignant message:
In time, the pendulum swings,
and you can’t hear the butterfly’s wings.
It was her way of reminding me to hold on to my youthful passion, to nurture the light within, and to resist life’s inevitable disappointments.
This wisdom has stayed with me long after her passing, and in the years since, butterflies have become more than a reminder of her — they’ve become her messengers.
Butterflies often appear in my life when I’m feeling overwhelmed, under attack, or grieving a loss. They flutter around me, landing gently on my skin and hovering close as if to whisper a reminder: “Don’t let anyone steal your light.”
These delicate creatures have become symbols of resilience, hope, and the enduring connection between my grandmother’s spirit and my own.
Butterflies hold deep spiritual significance across cultures and belief systems. They are seen as symbols of transformation, freedom, and the soul’s journey.
Their life cycle — from caterpillar to cocoon to winged beauty — mirrors our own processes of growth, healing, and self-discovery. They teach us that even in our most confined and vulnerable states, there is the potential for magnificent change.
Forgiving Yourself Is A Spiritual Necessity
Self-forgiveness is more than just a mental health recommendation – it is a spiritual necessity. It is vital for the spiritually aware person to release guilt, self-blame, and self-criticism, because forgiving oneself is crucial to both personal well-being and spiritual progress. It allows for healing, growth, and the ability to live a more fulfilling and harmonious life.
Failure to forgive ourselves can have profound personal and spiritual side effects. Carrying guilt and self-blame leads to chronic emotional distress and contributes to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Over time, this can manifest itself in physical symptoms such as headaches, fatigue, or even chronic illness.
A lack of self-forgiveness undermines self-worth and hinders personal growth and development. Difficulty forgiving yourself also strains your relationships with others, as it can lead to withdrawal, defensiveness, or projecting negativity onto those around you. Without forgiveness, our negative feelings toward ourselves can fester and damage even our most cherished relationships with our loved ones and friends.
Holding onto guilt and self-blame blocks the flow of positive energy through the chakras and hinders spiritual well-being. For example, guilt often stagnates in the solar plexus chakra, affecting one’s sense of personal power. Self-forgiveness is essential for clearing such blockages in the energy field.
Forgiveness is also essential to achieving inner peace and harmony. Without it, one can experience constant inner turmoil and restlessness. When we hold onto guilt, shame, or self-blame, parts of our spiritual essence or inner divinity are suppressed or disconnected. It causes separation from one’s spiritual path or a sense of disconnection from spirit and the divine.