twin flame
What Comes First: Friendship Or Romance?
Is it really necessary to build a solid foundation of friendship when you already have a gut feeling that the person you just met might be “the one”?
This is a question I sometimes get from clients seeking a love or relationship reading. They want to know whether they should focus on building a friendship first if they feel that their relationship has the potential to lead to a long-term commitment or marriage.
The answer can vary depending on the people involved and the unique dynamics of their relationship.
While there’s no one-size-fits-all answer, building a friendship can provide a stable foundation for the deeper layers of a romantic relationship. Friendship helps create a space where mutual respect, understanding, and shared values can flourish – qualities that are crucial to a lasting partnership.
I find many folks jump into a relationship with both feet, convinced they’ve found their true soulmate, only to be disappointed later.
Developing a strong friendship with your partner can be incredibly beneficial. It allows you to get to know each other on a deeper level without the pressure or distractions that often come with romantic and physical intimacy. In a friendship, you’re more likely to feel comfortable being your authentic self. This authenticity can lead to a stronger emotional connection, which can then become the foundation for a more serious romantic connection.
The Unresolved Karmic Bonds Between Souls
Have you ever found yourself thinking about an old friend or flame that you haven’t spoken to in years, and they suddenly show up in your life in the most unexpected place? This often happens when we are still energetically connected to someone.
There are invisible energy cords that connect us to many different souls across dimensions and incarnations. These karmic connections are deep soul bonds that transcend time and space and span multiple lifetimes.
Those we love (or hate) – whether a partner or spouse, family members, friends – are all karmically connected to us.
Karmic connections aren’t easily severed. They also don’t simply disappear when we physically part ways in this world. These invisible cords keep us tied to those we’ve loved, lost, or even hurt—until we consciously choose to break free.
Karmic connections continue across lifetimes unless they are consciously severed and dissolved. But these energetic cords of attachment can be difficult to break. We may believe that a relationship is over on a logical level, but energetically the connection remains.
When betrayal or heartache occurs, an energy cord remains between the heart chakras of both individuals, often leading to a recurring cycle of pain and energy depletion due to these lingering connections.
Traumatic events, emotional or sexual attachments, promises, contracts and vows all create strong connections between souls. We often feel a sense of unfinished business when a promise or vow is broken or left unfulfilled.
The Mystery Of Soul Groups And Soul Contracts
In my work as a spiritual counselor to many people around the world, I have learned that we all belong to soul groups or families, and that each of us chooses to participate in our current lifetime in a certain way based on a pre-birth soul agreement or contract that we commit to before we come into this world.
I like to think of it as “auditioning for a play.’ Before we incarnate, we can choose to be in a comedy, a drama, an action, a horror, an epic adventure, or even a combination of all of these. We can also choose to take a central leading role, or just be a supporting cast member, or perhaps even a cameo or extra taking a background position.
What position are we willing and ready to take? This in itself can be a great karmic challenge as well as a profound learning experience. For example, if we have chosen a role that has caused grief or harm in a previous life, we will return in this life to try to resolve these latent karmic issues. If we are successful, it is wonderful because we can then pursue a completely different role or existence, or move on to something completely different in a future role.
Soul groups consist of a circle of souls with whom we have shared previous lives and are likely to meet in future lives. These groups are our spiritual families, and the members play different roles in each other’s lives through the process of soul evolution. We continually change roles in different lifetimes with other members of our soul group to facilitate learning and growth.
By interacting with these familiar souls from lifetime to lifetime, we create ongoing scenarios that karmically challenge us, assist us in our soul growth and evolution, and ultimately lead us to a state of spiritual fulfillment and enlightenment where our soul has transcended material limitations and reached its highest potential.
Perfect Love Is For Better Or Worse
For those of us who are spiritually aware and seeking to live consciously, the experience of a mystical romance can be both healing and enlightening. But the journey of soulmate love is not always a matter of moonlight and roses.
What is perfect love? Does it even exist? How can two people make their love last? Do we belong together? How can we be soulmates if we argue all the time? How is this a sacred union if he is being such a jerk?
These are some of the questions I sometimes get asked in relationship readings.
The guidance from spirit is always the same. The best marriages and committed relationships all have their ups and downs. Perfect love is loving your partner when things aren’t perfect. It’s about owning your differences and working through them as a team.
Perfect love isn’t about a flawless journey but about embracing the imperfections with grace. Meaningful relationships are an intricate dance, an alchemical symphony of highs and lows, joy and challenges. Perfect love that lasts will always have its ups and downs, like an exciting roller coaster ride.
In my experience, people who stay married for a very long time make their relationships last by being flexible and going with the ebb and flow. Successful partnerships ride this cosmic wave we call life. And when those big waves roll in during more challenging times, they just ride it out because there is always smoother sailing ahead. Hard times never last.
Do You Have A Past Life Connection?
Have you ever met someone and felt an instant connection that you couldn’t quite explain? Like you’ve known them forever, even though you just met? It’s that uncanny feeling of familiarity that makes you wonder if there’s more to your connection.
Sometimes, you might even experience déjà vu, feeling like you’ve been with this person before in another time or place. Maybe you even have some mental flashes of moments together in a different time and place, making you realize there’s a deeper reason for your bond.
These intense feelings and responses often come from cellular energy imprints and soul memories from our past lives. When you encounter someone you feel this way about, it’s usually because there’s some unfinished karmic business or soul growth that needs to happen, which is why you’ve crossed paths with them again in this lifetime.
Certain souls meet repeatedly across different lifetimes to resolve unresolved issues or karmic debts. There’s work to be done, lessons to be learned, and sometimes it takes more than one lifetime to get it all sorted out.
But not all these encounters are rosy. They can come with relationship challenges, tension, and conflict. For instance, a betrayal in a past life might manifest as trust issues in the present. It’s a journey that can be tough, but also deeply meaningful and very healing.
The Karmic Magnetism Of A Soul Love Connection
When we meet someone that we feel a deep, inexplicable love connection with – that magical spark that goes way beyond the surface – it’s never just chance or luck. It happens when two souls resonate on a deeper level, be it emotional, spiritual, or psychological.
Spiritually, we are like magnets. Sometimes we are irresistibly drawn to people who have qualities or energies that match our own. Other times we’re fascinated by those who seem to embody qualities that are different or even opposite to our own.
Like opposite poles of magnets, soul mates or spiritually compatible partners feel a natural pull toward each other. This attraction can be inexplicable, a deep sense of recognition, or a familiar feeling of “coming home.
This kind of attraction is never random; it’s part of the divine plan that guides our journey of personal growth and soul evolution. The people we’re attracted to, whether similar or different, offer us unique opportunities for spiritual growth.
This kind of special mutual attraction is part of our spiritual journey – a dance orchestrated by the universe. Whether we call them soulmates, twin flame connections, or soul contracts, they are spiritually significant partnerships designed to catalyze mutual growth.
For this reason, these connections often involve profound synchronicities and deeply transformative experiences. In fact, these types of relationships are one of the most important pathways for karmic learning, healing, growth and evolution in this lifetime.
Release Your Attachment To Attract ‘Zen Love’
I have talked to so many people over the years who desperately want someone special to come into their lives, but it never seems to happen for them. They wonder why they can’t connect with anyone, why they never seem to find true and lasting love.
When I do readings for them, Spirit often reveals that the root of the problem is that they either want it too much, or they turn themselves and the other person they are trying to attract into “polar magnets,” pushing each other away instead of being attracted to each other.
In order to attract what you want into your life, you have to let go of any attachment to the outcome, stay clear of any negative emotions, self-sabotage, and limiting beliefs, and essentially allow it to come to you without any obsession or force. I call this attracting “Zen love.
Zen love is finding someone when you are not really looking. It’s when you want it, but you don’t want it so desperately that it just doesn’t happen. I equate it to thinking about someone and then letting go of the thought. It is usually when you let go that they suddenly call you on the phone.
You put out the intention to meet someone special and then you let it go. That is being “in Zen. Not forcing it. Going on with your life and staying positive and just having that inner knowing that everything is going to be okay. That inner knowing without any added force allows good things to come to you.
Meanwhile, if you really want someone special to come into your life, instead of constantly dwelling on it or stressing about it, be proactive and put that wasted energy to better use. Get out more, live wholeheartedly, go places and do things.