Healing
Are You Holding On To A Broken Relationship?
Are you waiting for him to return to you? Has your break-up stopped you from living your life? Have you decided that no matter what anyone has said to you, that you know that he is coming back to you?
Holding on to a broken relationship is a common occurrence in many people’s lives. One person moves on, another does not.
When confronted with this dilemma, you may believe he will be back. I know him; he can’t function without me. He needs me. He knows we are spiritually connected. However, this is often not the truth of the situation. It is simply your ego egging you on to believe what you want to believe.
I usually ask people to go into their ‘gut’ and take the heart out of it. But still I will get, “My gut says he will be back.” This is ego, because the response is so quick and without breathing in and allowing your guides to give you the proper answer.
There are people that have sat around waiting for weeks, months and even years, for that person that they are sure they were destined to be with. Life passes them by and, yet, they remain convinced that the person is coming back against all odds.
Many of their partners move on, some even marry and start a family, and yet, still, the broken-hearted ex-partner waits for them to return.
There is a rule of thumb that goes with a breakup. Every person has to look at the true reason of the breakup, not what they think the issue was, not what they blame the other person for (or sometimes themselves). What is the true reason? Many times it comes down to compromise.
Give Yourself The Grace Of Forgiveness
If you are an empath you may believe that forgiveness should be easy for you, or at least easier than it is for others. But I’ve spoken to many empaths and highly sensitive people over the years who all struggle with forgiveness.
One of the main issues with forgiveness for the empath is that we feel another’s emotions intensely, literally as our own. This muddies the waters considerably, because it tends to blur boundaries. Blurred boundaries can often lead to a closed mouth for an empath. Why? Because it is difficult for us, especially in childhood or in romantic relationships, to know where we end and another begins.
It is easy for others to manipulate appropriate boundaries with an empath, or to erase them altogether. All the empath knows is that there is pain, sadness, a sense of frustration, or anger. If you are an empath, then the question becomes are you angry with them, or yourself? Should you have been able to foresee the catastrophe happening, the relationship ending, job imploding, and so on. This leads to self-doubt and the rehashing of incidents that occurred years ago…with no resolution.
In the meantime, every time an empath thinks about the situation, past or present, we feel it…and the cycle continues.
Yes, you are empathic, intuitive, even psychic, but that does not make you immune to being human, neither does it make you all-knowing or all-seeing, especially when it comes to your own life, childhood or relationships.
Navigating Grief Without Losing Yourself
In my work as a psychic reader, I have worked with many people navigating grief. Over the years, I have witnessed how people process loss and transition differently.
I have often had to guide clients toward grounding, self-trust, and setting compassionate boundaries. And, as life would have it, I recently had to draw on that wisdom and apply it to my own family.
My father was recently admitted to hospice care at his local nursing home after spending a week in the hospital. His prognosis was poor.
As our family transitioned to this new phase of care, I stayed in touch with loved ones and made decisions centered on his comfort and dignity.
At the same time, I made a conscious effort to protect my emotional energy and maintain healthy boundaries so that I could stay grounded.
In these circumstances I’ve been grappling with a kind of grief that isn’t often acknowledged: the grief of realizing someone you love is no longer the person they once were.
Even when they are physically present, the relationship shifts. There can be a quiet heartbreak in adjusting to the present while remembering the past.
There is also grief in watching a family reorganize itself. During times of transition, long-standing dynamics often change. Some family connections deepen and some relationships no longer operate as they once did. This can also feel like a loss in terms of shared understanding and how things “used to be.” Sudden changes in family circumstances tend to reveal where everyone actually stands.
Time Apart Is Healthy For Your Relationship
Have you noticed that your relationships with partner, friends and even family members are much better when you see them less often? There is real wisdom in the saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
When we are around the same person for a very long time, they tend to eventually bore, frustrate, or annoy us. Time away is vital. We all need space to recharge our batteries and newly appreciate the people in our lives.
I know this is tried and true from having done may psychic readings over the years for people who found relief, and even rebirth, in their relationships after they had been away from their lovers, spouses, wives, husbands mothers, sisters, or friends. Not only did they ultimately appreciate their loved ones more, but they also got along much better with them.
There is on rare occurrences those who can tolerate being around each other 24/7 and get along wonderfully. But this rare.
Most of us need to take a break sometimes. If you want to enhance any relationship, taking a little time away (even just for the day) from each other can work wonders.
I know two people that have been married for a very long time, and it seems they are always happiest after hunting season. During the months of September and October this lady I read for is always so upbeat, full of energy and ideas, and brimming with creativity.
Small Gestures Of Kindness In A Time Of Cruelty
Many people are feeling anxious or uncertain in recent years with everything that has been happening in the world.
Some are fearful and others stressed or unsure how to act appropriately in these restless times. Some even act out in destructive or dramatic ways, taking their frustration out on others.
It is common knowledge that the digital age and social media has spawned a generation of computer warriors and online bullies who express their insecurities and fears, in often extremely mean and cruel ways, from the comfort of their living rooms and basements.
This savage lack of empathy and decorum has seemingly now spilt over into our streets and neighborhoods too.
It is easier for many to be critical and judgmental, to complain and argue, instead of facing facts, dealing with the truth and seeking lasting solutions.
Often not knowing the entire story, many people choose to see only see one side of things, while telling others off for disagreeing with their limited point of view. The computer has unfortunately given some people a platform to spread strife and hatred, instead of love, hope and kindness.
I pray that more people will strive to seek the truth and learn to look for the good and kind in others. Showing tolerance, patience and kindness is always the better, more open approach. And always remember that if someone attacks you directly, then it often means they are somehow struggling or hurting. It usually serves no real purpose to attack them back. Continue reading
The Difference Between Soul Rescue And Soul Retrieval
In shamanic and spiritual traditions, soul recovery practices are based on the understanding that a person’s soul essence or ‘life force’ can become fragmented or lost due to trauma.
While these two shamanic arts are closely related and often assumed to be the same practcie, they refer to different contexts of healing. There is a subtle, but key difference.
Soul retrieval is the most common term used in modern shamanism and it is based on the idea of soul loss.
When a person experiences a severe physical or emotional trauma, such as an accident, abuse, grief, or a difficult breakup, a part of their vital essence may abandon the body to survive the experience. This is essentially a spiritual survival mechanism, similar to dissociation in psychology.
This disassociation might be related to the trauma of a car accident or extreme injury, or perhaps a memory of a time in someone’s life when an attribute of their soul felt threatened or fearful.
Other typical examples include physical, sexual or emotional abuse as a child; a feeling of abandonment after the death of a relative; financial ruin; nearly dying; or loss of a job.
Someone suffering from this kind of soul loss might feel “spaced out,” numb, incomplete, or like they are watching their life from the sidelines. Chronic depression or a sense that “I haven’t been the same” since the traumatic event are common indicators.
The Empowered Empath’s Guide To Spiritual Self-Care
Empaths, sensitives and intuitives tend to be givers. Loyal, sometimes to a fault, and fiercely protective of those they care about… moving at lightning speed whenever called upon.
So, when I say to an empath that it may be time to put themselves first, the response is often mixed.
But, if putting yourself first seems too selfish or too difficult, try something simpler: at least put yourself on an equal footing with those you love and care for.
For many sensitive and highly intuitive people, self-care must be an acquired behavior… and it’s a big one. Empaths intend to be selfless, to help, heal and facilitate those they care about. Wonderful!
But remember, if this is your goal, then begin with yourself. The stronger, healthier and happier you are then the more effective, nurturing and supportive you can be to those around you.
Putting yourself first doesn’t mean that you are doing only what you want to do all the time, and it doesn’t mean that you are suddenly going to ignore those you care about.
What it does mean is making it a priority to take care of your own physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs. This can be a tall order and quite the task for some empaths. Don’t wait until you are in a meltdown… frustrated and snapping at everything and everyone around you, with little or no provocation.