inner peace
Not A People Person, Or Pleaser, And That’s Okay!
I have had clients tell me that they feel something is wrong with them, because they don’t like to be around people. They prefer solitude.
Others feel disconnected when around people, or it makes them feel smothered. People make them feel drained, or they feel out of their element.
If you are someone that does not like to be around people, or feels a sense of disconnect when in large groups, or even just engaging with others, fear not! I have some very good news to share with you.
It is my hope and prayer that this information will help you to stop being so hard on yourself when it comes to your social preferences. You do not need to feel guilty for not wanting to slap on a “happy face” and pretend to be someone you are not.
There is nothing wrong with you in my opinion. There is a simple reason why you don’t enjoy being around other people so much. The reason is that you have been to this planet many times before and basically you have “been here done this,” as it were.
Okay, so you don’t feel like being around your fellow humans. What to do? Tell yourself this, “it is okay that I don’t want to engage with others.” Then tell yourself, “I love myself just the way I am and now see the beauty in me that I never did.
But instead of judging myself, or thinking there is something wrong with me, from this day forward I promise to allow myself to embrace the freedom of placing myself where I feel comfortable, and free, and at peace.” Continue reading
Staying Calm Is Often The Key To Inner Peace
Sometimes the emotional charge of something as simple as a misunderstood comment, or a statement taken out of context, can throw even the most level-headed person into a tailspin.
Developing a general demeanor of good humor can assist you in dealing with some of these most difficult, embarrassing or awkward situations encountered in life.
Everyone handles things differently, doing the best they can with the information they have at the time.
Although, generally, the goal is to come to a better understanding and reach common ground, sometimes this takes much more time, effort and compromise than expected.
Although it is important to resolve an issue and clear the air, if possible, it is equally important to put each issue into context. Years from the date of the affront, will the issue be remembered at all and, if so, will it have anywhere near the importance that it did at the time?
Certain issues will never be forgotten, however, they can often be forgiven for the sake of all parties involved.
Long after the dust has settled, though, some people are inclined to continue to ruminate and replay negative scenarios over and over again.
This only serves to feed the flames of injustice and keeps the anger front of mind, long after the offending party has moved on physically and/or emotionally. As a result, rehashing the past can seem to perpetuate an aura of general negativity in your life.
Thorns Are Only There To Protect The Rose
Each time we turn to unnecessary conflict, things turn into chaos. It stirs up the aura around each person involved. The ripples of anger and hurt affects everyone involved.
This doesn’t mean we can’t ever stand up for ourselves, or disagree. In fact, statistics prove that couples who never argue most often don’t last in their relationships.
A good storm now and then can clear up things and allow us opportunity to express the things we have been suppressing.
But often we hold it in for too long, and then it blows up. When this happens, the drama is often worse than it needed to be. We say things we later regret. We are even surprised by some of the things we say when we get this upset! Where did that come from?
Then, as time goes on, we want to make amends. Yet, those words caused a hurt that never really leaves. Sometimes an apology is no longer enough.
I know that it is hard to do, but it is mostly for the best not to stir the pot when it is already too late. The wisest way to handle issues is to bring them up early on. Talk and work them out before they blow up.
Love is like a rose. Roses are so beautiful, with their sweet smell, the velvet petals, brilliant colors, and heady scent. It overwhelms the senses.
Ask Spirit For Patience This Holiday Season
The holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration. But for some of us, it can also be a time of tension, distress, and intense emotions.
Instead of being a time of gratitude, love, and connection, for some of us the holidays mark the resurfacing of old family conflicts, unresolved tensions, and the weight of others’ overwhelming expectations or criticisms.
These challenges often lead to frustration, sadness, anger, or feelings of being overwhelmed, turning what should be a time of love and belonging into one that underscores where our relationships with loved ones are most strained.
At this point, asking spirit or your higher power to help you cultivate the virtue of patience becomes a powerful way to stay grounded and centered.
Patience isn’t just about enduring difficult moments; it’s about being aware of those moments and choosing to respond with grace and dignity rather than impulsively. When tensions rise — perhaps during a family dinner where conversations may become heated or awkward — it is easy to fall back on old patterns and habitual responses. Asking for spiritual support and protection in these moments, however, can provide a higher perspective and an empowered response.
Whether it’s through a silent prayer, a few deep breaths, whispering your favorite mantra, or simply making a conscious call for help in your mind, spiritual presence can help you pause, step back, ground and center, and approach the situation calmly and with more compassion — for yourself and others.
Spiritual Awakening ‘Turns On The Light’
What exactly is a spiritual awakening, and is there a way you can tell if you are having one? Here are some ways to be aware of what is happening to you.
The first sign is usually when you are no longer living in a ‘dream world,’ where you used to see everything through your human ego and you were overly focused on the future and your past.
This is a clear sign that you are becoming more spiritually aware. You have a greater awareness of your individual self and the connection between that and everything else. Things start to come into better focus in your life and make more sense.
When you closely examine various religions and faith traditions, there is usually a common thread that describes this state of heightened awareness as nirvana, enlightenment, or awakening.
This new consciousness happens when you stop being the observer, and instead ask yourself, who is observing?
Many people go through life on ‘autopilot,’ because that is what they were taught, or they simply fell into a routine without giving much thought to who they really are, or what they truly need or desire to make their life meaningful.
Asking such questions about yourself is important for your personal growth and self-realization. It is ‘turning the light on’ so to speak. The first step in growth is always the awareness of the present moment followed by an impulse to change something. Continue reading
Always Remember That You Are Enough
You are enough. If only, as we grew up, we had heard more such words, even if there was an additional “… and yet strive for more”.
The fact is we were raised in a world where competition is prevalent; where our insecurities are often emphasized to us, or used as leverage (intentionally or otherwise); where our personal beliefs about ourselves potentially delays our soul evolution.
As partners in the Universe we say to ourselves, “Everything has a reason, we each have a soul purpose, all is in Divine Order.”
Yet, when a tragedy or life shattering moment hits, we are so intimately impacted that we have to dig deep to console ourselves and try to reframe that that tragedy has a Divine purpose, and that you have enough and are enough in that moment.
Perhaps such a life event is the loss of a family member, a loving relationship, job, pet, or a financial crisis, or any other life-changing event. Our faith in Divinity may keep us going, but it does not change the fact that we are deeply grieved by this loss.
Our ego will bring up all sorts of emotions, including anger, grief, betrayal, denial, hatred and many other emotions. You may espouse such things as, “Why them why not me” or “I feel cheated” and “How could this happen”.
In our Divine space, devoid of analytical ego, we know in our heart this experience is for our soul growth path and those closely connected with us, but that is still hard to face.
Learning To Say Yes To Yourself
It is in the empath’s nature to say ‘yes’ to just about anything requested of them. It goes against our grain. For some of us, saying ‘no’ also brings on fears of rejection, abandonment or letting someone down when it may be important to support them.
Rather than finding an excuse, or simply telling the truth, many of us give in and just go along. It just feels easier in the moment, and even validating or satisfying.
But when you end that phone call, or respond to another text, and you feel anxious and panicked, while you start going over all the other things that will have to fall to the wayside by saying yes, then you really are saying no to yourself.
Self-care requires that we sometimes say no to others, in order to say yes to our own well-being and peace of mind. Consequently, the person that you said yes to won’t be getting the best of you. If you have said yes at your own expense, then what you bring to the table for that person is stress and anxiety. Your best self will not be fully present.
Saying yes, when you really want to say no, can also lead to resentment that you then attach to the person who asked for your assistance.
Here the responsibility lies with ourselves. We teach people how to treat us and many times we don’t give others enough credit for understanding when we say no. Most people would rather hear. “No thanks, that time doesn’t work for me” or “I have other commitments,” instead of having to sense a half-hearted or less than enthusiastic yes.