resentment
Praying For Your Departed Loved Ones
A client recently asked me if there is any benefit to praying for a loved one who has passed away? Does it make a difference in their transition to their new plane of existence? Can it somehow assist them in their continued existence in the afterlife? Can they even hear us?
We can absolutely connect with the spirits of those who have passed on, although it may sometimes feelas if they cannot hear us. Whether we are praying for them, talking to them, or simply grieving for them, we are connecting with them on a spiritual level and they are hearing us.
In fact, praying for our deceased loved ones has a very positive effect on their soul journey and they deeply appreciate it.
Some people believe that when we die, we go to some blissful realm of perfect existence where all our problems and karmic debts are instantly resolved, or left behind on the earth plane for others to deal with or pick up the pieces. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Most of us will pass away someday with some unresolved issues, negative feelings, resentments, grudges, or regrets that we will need to continue to work on in the afterlife. Of course, some of us will have much more to work on than others. Just because we leave this physical world does not mean that we are free of all our responsibilities and no longer accountable for anything or anyone.
It is therefore helpful to send our prayers to departed loved ones to help them with whatever spiritual or karmic “baggage” they may be taking along with them on their journey to the other side. Although they may leave behind symptoms of illness or financial debt, for example, their spiritual ailments will still need to be healed.
Coping With The Loss Of A Loved One
Many people I know, including myself and several of my clients, have experienced the loss of a child or grandchild.
Losing a grandparent or parent is heartbreaking, but losing a child is absolutely devastating! It is difficult to understand why someone so young is taken before they had a chance to live a full life.
A few years ago, I found some solace for my continuing grief from a very unexpected source.
I am an avid Nascar fan. If you don’t know what Nascar is, it is the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing. Stock car racing is one of the largest spectator sports in America.
A few years ago I watched an interview with one of the masters of this sport, Richard Petty, also known as “The King.” His words struck a deep chord with me.
Richard Petty’s grandson, Adam Petty, was also a racer like his grandfather. He was only 19 when he died in an accident on May 12, 2000 while practicing the sport he loved so much. His car hit the outside wall of the track, killing him instantly.
In the interview I watched, his grandfather spoke of his depression, guilt, grief, and not wanting to get out of bed because he felt he was somehow to blame for encouraging his grandson to pursue this sport that cost him his young life.
Get Ready For A New Year Of Boundless Joy!
As we stand on the precipice of a new year of endless possibilities and limitless potential, I invite you to join me on a journey of self-actualization, spiritual enlightenment, and unwavering hope and optimism in 2024.
This year, let us embrace the transformative power of positive thinking, the resilience of the human spirit, and the boundless divine wisdom that lies within each of us. Let us throw off the shackles of self-doubt and negativity and embrace the extraordinary potential that lies within our souls.
Most importantly, let us strive this year to stay in our joy as much and as often as possible. For true joy and inner peace come into our hearts only when we invite them into our consciousness. Happiness does not just come, we must choose to seek it.
As we embark on a new year full of promise, let us also remember that we are part of a network of interconnected beings, each with a unique purpose and a vital role to play in the grand tapestry of life. Let us foster compassion, empathy and understanding and create a world where love and kindness prevail. Let us be kind, compassionate and generous, spreading love and light wherever we go.
Maybe It’s Time To Let Go Of The Baggage
Most people who make New Year’s resolutions don’t keep them. Every year we tell ourselves it’s time to move on, to change, to leave negative people and influences in the past, and yet we rarely follow through. We wonder if it is even possible to let go of the things that hold us back?
Yes, it certainly is!
The first step is to simply make the decision that it’s time to let go of all the old baggage in your life. To do this we must be completely honest about what’s really holding us back and why it’s so difficult to let go. This is sometimes best done with the help of a coach or mentor, such as a therapist, spiritual advisor or trusted friend, who will listen and guide you objectively.
Until we have a true understanding of all our baggage and our own part in it, it will never go away. We must also be gentle and accepting as we travel this path. The past can never be undone, but it can be learned from and it can help us move into a better future.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results each time.” It’s within our power to change negative thinking patterns and habits. Good habits take at least a month to wire into our brains. Start with affirmations, practice better self-care, and stop obsessing about things you can’t change or control. Over time, you’ll find yourself making better decisions that aren’t tainted by the past.
The Spiritual Importance Of Releasing Resentments
I went out for lunch today and had a bad service experience with the waitress. It was as if she didn’t care much to listen to what I wanted. She seemed distracted and careless.
Two and a half months ago, I had a similar experience at another restaurant when the server packed the wrong items for me to take home. I felt ignored, even disrespected. Today’s experience brought back the same feelings and memories.
I was so upset that I decided I was not going to leave her a tip. But then, in the middle of my meal, while feeling angry and somewhat sorry for myself, I overheard a nearby customer calling her friend by the same name as my late mother.
This caused me to pause and reflect on my toxic thoughts about the careless waitress. You see, my mother was also a waitress many years ago. It was how she put food on the table and put us through school.
Perhaps today’s events were meant to remind me during the holiday season how many of us go through life with unhealed “mother wounds.”
Spirit now had my attention and proceeded to make me aware that my waitress had her own issues with her mother growing up, and that she is now a single mother herself, barely making ends meet. This realization instantly changed my perspective and my petulant attitude.
Comparison Poisons The Heart, Mind And Soul
When we are going through difficult times, we tend to compare our struggles and suffering to the lives of others and measure ourselves by their perceived happiness, joy and success.
We often do this these days by comparing our own lives to what others post on social media. Then we judge and mentally torture ourselves for not living up to other people’s highlight reels of happiness and good fortune.
Sure, it is sometimes beneficial to self-reflect and strive for more based on the examples of others who serve as our role models. However, when we indiscriminately compare our own life journey to everyone else’s, we end up diminishing our own uniqueness and value.
While social comparison can motivate us to improve and grow, it can also lead to toxic self-judgment, envy, resentment, and extreme unhappiness. Constantly focusing on the highlights of other people’s lives quickly becomes toxic and self-destructive.
However, this tendency is not a character flaw in some of us. In fact, it is a natural evolutionary instinct that we all have. Our ancestors survived by living in social groups. Our tendency to compare ourselves to others is therefore a very common human trait, rooted in our evolution as a species.
The Golden Power Of Silence
I took my early morning walk today along a path surrounded by an olive grove on one side and almond trees on the other. In the background the beautiful hills seemed mystical in the early morning mist.
The only sounds that broke the silence at this early hour were the chirping of birds and the bleating of baby goats playing on the small farm opposite my house. Occasionally they were interrupted by their father, who seemed to keep them safe by nudging them into a particular corner of the property.
In these moments of peaceful silence I like to have a dialogue with spirit to receive some guidance or direction for the day, as well as answers to questions I may have about my life and work. But today I felt guided to simply contemplate the meaning of silence.
There are many forms of silence, some less peaceful than others. For example, there are the ‘elephant in the room’ or ‘cold shoulder’ moments of silence when there is awkwardness between people. There is also the ‘poker face’ silence, when someone pretends to listen, but in reality has mentally withdrawn from the conversation. We also fall silent when we are perplexed or confused. Sometimes we keep silent to avoid possible misunderstandings.
A very powerful form of silence occurs when we are deeply engaged in an activity, alone or with others. Everything else seems to fade away as we concentrate on the task at hand.
And of course the best kind of silence is when we are in communion with spirit and the cosmos. In these moments we feel completely at peace and connected to others and the universe. This silence nourishes the soul and gives rise to divine inspiration and spiritual insight.