relationship
Embracing Growth Challenges In Your Relationship
At some point in a romantic relationship, we all face challenges that test our connection with our partner or spouse. People disagree, make mistakes, and experience conflict. It’s human nature.
However, it is important to realize that most problems in a developing relationship are often not inherently negative or catastrophic. Instead, they present valuable opportunities for personal growth, healing, and self-discovery.
If you believe that your happiness in a relationship depends on finding the perfect partner, it’s time for a new perspective. The key to a happy relationship is to remove personal barriers one at a time. By doing so, you can fully immerse yourself in love and become a magnet for attracting the right partner into your life.
Consider the following five common issues that many new couples face and how you can learn from them to foster a stronger, more fulfilling connection with your significant other.
The Happiness Myth
Some people go into a new relationship expecting their partner to bring them the complete state of happiness, joy, and fulfillment they have always sought. But others cannot make us happy, joyful, or fulfilled because achieving this is always an inside job. It starts with us.
It’s important to ask yourself what really brings you joy and satisfaction. A healthy, successful relationship requires both partners to cultivate and contribute their own individual happiness, joy, and fulfillment, rather than expecting their significant other to provide it for both of them. It is our responsibility to create our own happiness, not our partner’s.
It is only when you take responsibility for your life that you discover how powerful you truly are ~ Allanah Hunt
The Blame Game
A common mistake in relationships is to blame our partner for our own thoughts, moods, or emotions. But no one else is responsible for our thoughts and feelings. We are the ones doing the thinking and feeling! We must take personal responsibility for them.
By releasing the false belief that our partner is responsible for our state of mind and emotions, we liberate ourselves, take back our power, and reclaim our autonomy. Yes, they may upset or disappoint us. They may upset us or hurt our feelings.But it remains our choice how to think, feel and react to them. We cannot control our partner’s words and actions, but we can absolutely control our own.
Take responsibility for your attitudes, emotions, and thought patterns. If you tend to constantly experience negative emotions or overreact in a dysfunctional way to almost everything your partner says or does, or to life in general, then it may be necessary to explore the root causes of your negativity rather than projecting it all onto your partner.
On the other hand, if your partner really does behave in ways that make you feel upset, sad, or depressed for good reason, then it may be time to rethink the future of your relationship. Either way, it will take some hard work. Seeking professional help from a reputable therapist or counselor is highly recommended.
The Frog Prince Delusion
Many people enter into a new relationship with someone who they think has the “potential” to become their ideal partner, rather than accepting their partner for who they really are. If you cannot unconditionally accept someone exactly as they are, then it is usually not a good idea to start a relationship with them.
Having unrealistic expectations that your partner will change or become a different person is usually a fool’s errand. Yes, people do grow and develop over time. But in a healthy relationship, partners grow and evolve together. They respect each other’s differences and celebrate each other’s uniqueness. They do not wait for their partner to change or demand they become someone better or different.
Trying to mold our partners to fit our expectations and meet all our demands not only stifles their authenticity and undermines the foundation of love, it is mission impossible. You cannot kiss a frog into becoming a prince or princess. We cannot change others. We can only change ourselves.
True, lasting love comes from wholeheartedly accepting yourself and your partner for who you both really are, with all your strengths and weaknesses.
You can’t possibly embrace that new relationship, that new companion, that new career, that new friendship, or that new life you want, while you’re still holding on to the baggage of the last one ~ Steve Maraboli
The Sleigh Ride
In new relationships, we often try to be perfect, keep up appearances, or project a certain image of ourselves, believing that we’ll only be loved if we meet certain expectations. But true love comes from being fully ourselves. You cannot build a lasting relationship by taking someone for a sleigh ride with pretense and deceit.
When we embrace authenticity and allow ourselves to be honest and vulnerable, we open ourselves up to genuine connection. Our own authenticity also invites our partners to do the same, fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual understanding.
The Baggage Drag
Most people have faced challenges or had negative experiences in previous relationships. Often these experiences can leave deep emotional scars that affect new relationships, but carrying this baggage into a new relationship creates an energetic burden and hinders growth.
To experience a healthy, fulfilling relationship, we must process our emotional wounds and release the past. Sometimes this is as simple as choosing to start with a clean slate or giving our new partner the benefit of the doubt. But in cases where someone has experienced extreme abuse, loss, or trauma, it may be necessary to seek professional help before entering a new relationship.
A new partner should not have to take on the old baggage and carry the burden of all the damage someone else has caused. Just because they are brave enough and willing to be there for you, does not mean they are equipped to handle it.
Embrace the growth opportunities that come from relationship challenges and embark on a journey of self-discovery and empowered connection. Remember that every relationship is an exciting learning experience that brings us closer to a more fulfilling and harmonious love. Continue reading
Thorns Are Only There To Protect The Rose
Each time we turn to unnecessary conflict, things turn into chaos. It stirs up the aura around each person involved. The ripples of anger and hurt affects everyone involved.
This doesn’t mean we can’t ever stand up for ourselves, or disagree. In fact, statistics prove that couples who never argue most often don’t last in their relationships.
A good storm now and then can clear up things and allow us opportunity to express the things we have been suppressing.
But often we hold it in for too long, and then it blows up. When this happens, the drama is often worse than it needed to be. We say things we later regret. We are even surprised by some of the things we say when we get this upset! Where did that come from?
Then, as time goes on, we want to make amends. Yet, those words caused a hurt that never really leaves. Sometimes an apology is no longer enough.
I know that it is hard to do, but it is mostly for the best not to stir the pot when it is already too late. The wisest way to handle issues is to bring them up early on. Talk and work them out before they blow up.
Love is like a rose. Roses are so beautiful, with their sweet smell, the velvet petals, brilliant colors, and heady scent. It overwhelms the senses.
Remember To Treasure The Living Years
Many of us attach personal meaning to songs. Perhaps it is a song played at your wedding, or a family member’s favorite tune, or something meaningful from your childhood years.
Psychics often have songs come to mind during readings, or we find they are playing on the car radio after we were just thinking of that special family member or friend. We then take that as a sign that they are watching over us and that they had just stepped in from the Spirit side of life to make their presence know.
These songs can be the triggers for memories that we once treasured, or continue to treasure, or to remind you how precious and loved you are.
For me Ave Maria and Unchained Melody (from the Ghost movie during the pottery making scene) are songs that I have attached over the years to my mother’s presence. Ave Maria because that was one of her favorite songs. When she was younger she apparently sang it on stage a few times in Vienna.
I never did get to hear her sing it, but family said it was incredible. Later in life, when I found this out, she said her voice had broken and would not sing it for me. I often tried to imagine how great it must have been to hear her sing, as I looked at her picture.
Tarot Forecast December 2025: Queen Of Swords
As we near the end of the year, the Queen of Swords comes up as our guiding archetype for this final month of 2025. Her energy is one of discernment, honesty, and mental clarity. She is a powerful presence that calls us to rise above emotional noise and align with truth.
Where other cards might emphasize emotional depth or spiritual surrender, the Queen of Swords reminds us of the sacred wisdom of logic, perception, and clear boundaries. She is the elder counsel of the Tarot court, known for her keen intellect and ability to cut through illusion with precision and grace.
This month, her influence brings an invitation to end the year with conscious reflection and empowered decision-making. December’s energy is not about rushing into resolutions or emotional reactions, but about taking a pause to consider where we’ve been, what we value, and where we wish to go.
The Queen of Swords challenges us to lead with truth, not just in our communication with others, but in the narratives we hold within ourselves. She speaks to the power of thoughtful boundaries, the necessity of honest dialogue, and the liberation that comes when we finally let go of what no longer serves our growth.
Under her watchful eye, we may find ourselves more reflective, more intentional, and more willing to let clarity guide us. Whether it’s setting boundaries, speaking our truth, making a strategic decision, or decluttering our mental and emotional landscape, this month asks us to do so with integrity and intelligence. The Queen of Swords helps us end the year not in chaos, but in clarity. Continue reading
Give Yourself Permission To Be Happy!
My life would be great if only… I had more money… he would come back to me.. I can find a better job… I can reach my goal weight.
How many times have you heard such statements? How many times have you told yourself something like this? Is it truly the answer to lasting happiness? What if there was a way to train your brain to accept life and live your best in the meantime?
As a hypnotherapist, my experience has been that when any suggestion is put into the mind, the subconscious will accept the information, whether it is true or false.
Whatever a person chooses to tell themselves enough times becomes their truth. The information becomes a habit to believe the suggestion. Some habits are good and some not so good. A bad habit needs to be replaced with a good one.
Why not take all the positive steps needed to live your best in the meantime… while waiting for the wishes to come true. There are many ways to retrain the brain, just as there are many ways to travel to a destination.
Some people like the fastest route, while other like the scenic route, in order to see the sights along the way. It doesn’t really matter what route you take. What does matter is that you truly have the belief that you can reach the destination, and allow yourself to enjoy the ride in the meantime.
The Man Who Pushed Me Off A Cliff
Since I was a child, I have had fragmented memories of my past lives. These flashbacks are all parts of those lives and lessons that pertain to my soul growth and karma in this lifetime.
So far, all of my past life memories have had to do with someone I have interacted with here, in my current incarnation. In other words, I have met all of the people in my past life memories in this lifetime also.
One such memory of a past life, is of a man I was married to in Ireland. We were quite young. I would say no more than 20. We were poor and lived in a little cottage, near a cliff overlooking the ocean. It was a modest, but breathtakingly beautiful home and land. I also remember that I had long, curly red hair.
Sadly, my husband in that lifetime was physically and emotionally abusive. He was always worried that men would desire me and take me away from him.
But I had never been with any man but him. I didn’t want to be with my husband, but I certainly didn’t want another man to control and own me either.
He kept me prisoner in our home and refused to let me leave. My solace was the church. My soul’s water and food was the sunlight, and the sounds and smell of the ocean. My fantasies consisted of building a boat and heading out into the vastness, toward the sunset, letting the ocean’s waves carry me away to wherever she wished me to be. Interestingly, in my present life, nature has always been my sanctuary.
How To Deal With Energy Vampires And Psychic Bullies
Someone or something draining your energy? Most of the time it’s someone whom you are either trying to please, or get approval from, or someone you’re trying to help. You may begin to notice that something changes in your energy field each time you are around this person, or that you feel an imbalance of some sort afterwards. When I say being around a person, this can mean exposure to them through meeting in person, texting, talking over the phone, and even energetically, or psychically.
Energy bullies and psychic vampires are very good sucking the life force right out of you. Unfortunately, you may not notice this is happening, until after the fact. However, once you realize what has happened, identifying it is the first step to proactive healing, regeneration, and protection from allowing it to happen again.
Let’s have a closer look at what is actually taking place during an energy drain. Suppose you have a friend who is always complaining about her life, or often has a negative outlook on every situation she is involved in. This could also be a family member you meet for coffee, or whom you chat with over the phone regularly. And dealing with this person leaves you always energetically drained, deflated or emotionally unsettled.
I’d like to preface this with the fact that we all have times where we need to vent, or reach out for help when we are struggling with something. On the other hand, we also have moments where we need to be the voice of reason for someone else, or have an open mind and heart to listen and truly be there for the people we love and care about. Listening is so important in relationships, but if only one person is talking and one person is listening, over and over again, it is a drain on the listener.