victim mentality
Comparison Poisons The Heart, Mind And Soul
When we are going through difficult times, we tend to compare our struggles and suffering to the lives of others and measure ourselves by their perceived happiness, joy and success.
We often do this these days by comparing our own lives to what others post on social media. Then we judge and mentally torture ourselves for not living up to other people’s highlight reels of happiness and good fortune.
Sure, it is sometimes beneficial to self-reflect and strive for more based on the examples of others who serve as our role models. However, when we indiscriminately compare our own life journey to everyone else’s, we end up diminishing our own uniqueness and value.
While social comparison can motivate us to improve and grow, it can also lead to toxic self-judgment, envy, resentment, and extreme unhappiness. Constantly focusing on the highlights of other people’s lives quickly becomes toxic and self-destructive.
However, this tendency is not a character flaw in some of us. In fact, it is a natural evolutionary instinct that we all have. Our ancestors survived by living in social groups. Our tendency to compare ourselves to others is therefore a very common human trait, rooted in our evolution as a species.
Kindness Will Transform Your Life
Recently, I have noticed that many of my clients are increasingly seeking spiritual guidance for loneliness and feelings of isolation. No matter what their unique circumstances may be, spirit’s response in these matters is always that the solution begins with ourselves.
We must be the change we wish to see in our world in order to live a more connected and joyful life. Yes, the world we live in these days can be very stressful and alienating, but that does not prevent us from being more kind and generous to others.
Whether it is a smile, opening a door for a stranger, saying thank you or have a nice day, giving a compliment, or making a small donation to a charity, these small gestures every day have a magical impact on our lives. Spirit says we have chosen to experience this life and it is part of our soul journey to go out and be the difference we wish to see in this sometimes difficult, chaotic world.
Being kind is a powerful daily reminder to ourselves and others of our interconnectedness; that we are all on this journey together. Whether it’s a small gesture of kindness or a grand act of generosity, the ripple effect of compassion creates a chain reaction that inspires others to pay it forward.
Finding Silver Linings On The Dark Days
The sky was dark this morning. Overcast, miserable, wet and windy. Not the best way to start any day.
To make matters worse, after several very busy days with readings, I had one of those rare “goose egg” days. Not a single client called me all day!
Halfway through my shift, I realized that my mind was starting to brew up all kinds of negative thoughts. Idle hands are indeed the devil’s workshop. Fortunately, I was able to nip it in the bud by the end of my shift. The last thing I needed in this miserable weather was to plunge myself into a pity party.
Instead, I gently coaxed myself back into a state of calm, centered inner peace and gratitude. After all, I have a lot to be thankful for in my life!
I also had to remind myself that I no longer have all my eggs in one basket. I have learned the hard way over the past few years to diversify my income, and I also have a nest egg in the bank for a rainy day.
Those of us who have been on a long and challenging journey to a better life realize that having a totally negative day is sometimes a necessary part of the process of self-improvement and greater fulfillment. If things were always easy and perfect, we would have no motivation to strive for anything better.
Random Acts Of Kindness
I was at the gym the other day, working out while feeling really sore and demotivated. It was about to rain and I was just feeling so uncomfortable and miserable.
As I reluctantly lay back in this machine to kick my legs out, I saw a woman limping over to another machine across from me. She was clearly struggling, but you could tell that she was determined, even though she was having a hard time. I thought to myself that I should not be so negative about my own situation because it was just a little muscle stiffness. That brave lady was obviously dealing with so much more.
I experience this kind of scenario all the time in life. Whenever I feel deprived, unlucky, or self-pitying, my guides remind me to count my blessings and check my privilege. Instead, I need to remember those who are truly in need and how much the less fortunate have to go without.
Did you know that an estimated 828 million people in the world go hungry every day? This means about one in ten people on the planet does not have enough food to meet their basic needs. You may be thinking, what can I do about it? Well, I can only speak for myself. I recently decided to donate a pound of canned goods or a bag of groceries to those in need for every pound of weight I lose. It keeps me in check and reminds me to be thankful that I have food on my table every day!
Keep Seeking The Light Beyond The Darkness
I do a trivia quiz almost every day to keep my mind stimulated and strong. This morning the question was: What is achluophobia? Well, it is the fear of the dark, which is a somewhat reasonable phobia since we instinctively want to be able to see what is going on around us in order to survive. However, as I thought about it more, I realized that we also have the same need to ‘see the light’ on a spiritual level.
The darkness of evil, hatred and despair is always out there, lurking in the background, trying to sneak into our hearts and minds and take over. There is a spiritual war going on in our hearts and minds every day.
As we are increasingly drawn into the darkness, we are also increasingly hit with setbacks, hurdles, heartaches, and hardships. Then, in our entitlement and arrogance, we wonder why God, Source, Spirit, the Divine, is not doing anything to help us? Why have we been abandoned? Is there even a higher, divine power that can come to our aid?
It is amazing how many people at one time or another indulge in the thought, the notion that the very God, Source, Spirit, Divine, Universe that guides, protects and provides for us, actually takes the time to also hate, punish or destroy us.
All we have to do is observe the miracle of nature to know that this is not true. Every little miracle of nature, every tree and plant, every stone, every living being has a reason and a purpose to exist in the wonderful mechanics of our planet.
Aligning The Anahata Chakra
Anahata chakra, also known as the heart chakra or heart center, is the fourth of seven primary chakras in the body. The Sanskrit word anahata means ‘unstruck’ or ‘unbeaten.’ It is the subtle sound produced ‘without touching two parts.’
The anahata chakra is located in the center of the chest, near the heart, and is associated with empathy, love, compassion, and forgiveness. It also governs our heart, lungs, thymus gland, and circulatory system and plays an important role in our immune system, emotions, and relationships.
It is symbolized by a twelve-petaled lotus flower with an intersection of two triangles representing the mystical union of the male and female, the metaphysical and physical. The anahata chakra serves as the bridge between the lower three physical chakras and the higher spiritual chakras, connecting the earthly and divine energies within us.
When the anahata chakra is open, aligned, and balanced, we feel a sense of connection with ourselves, others, and the world around us. We are also able to let go of negative emotions such as anger, resentment, and fear to rather give and receive love, foster compassion and empathy, and extend forgiveness towards ourselves and others. When the heart chakra is in balance, we experience a profound sense of love, tolerance, harmony, and emotional well-being.
On the other hand, when this chakra is blocked or underactive, we may have difficulty in expressing love and compassion. We are also more likely to be unkind and intolerant and experience negative emotions such as anger, resentment, fear, and even hatred.
Life Lesson From A Resilient Robin
A few days after I saw a robin attempting to build a nest on a neighbor’s balcony in my apartment building, I spotted another robin with a chest covered in mud. I was thrilled, as I knew this meant a little miracle of life was going to happen. And, it did. Three days later, she laid her clutch of tiny blue eggs in a nest built in a perennial shrub, next to the complex entry way where residents come and go all day.
Her strategy for building the nest in such a busy location became apparent two days after she had laid her eggs. A pack of savage crows descended on the nest, tragically cutting her clutch in half. Unlike the other robins, she had built her nest here so that she could potentially depend on human activity for added protection. Sadly, her plan failed.
Crows are one of the most intelligent bird species on the planet. They know and remember their potential enemies and prey. She may have cleverly built her nest here, hoping to avoid them because there are constantly humans around, but keeping crows away can be a real challenge, because of their intelligence and their adaptability. Things that scare them off at first, soon does not bother them anymore.
The crows were however the least of the strategic robin’s problems. After the crow rampage, the landscaping crew came through the property, using a weed whacker on the shrub where her nest was located. I later found her outside. Assuming she was traumatized and stress-foraging, I felt really sad for her. But she stared at me questioningly, then flew into a tree, while I feebly tried to console her. “All your efforts have been in vain,” I sadly thought while looking at her.
