self-esteem
Toxic Friendships: End It, Or Mend It?
Like all relationships, friendships have their ups and downs, testing the bonds that bind us together.
A true friend is someone who genuinely wants the best for you, celebrates your victories, and supports you through challenges. They offer encouragement, share your joys, and lend a sympathetic ear during difficult times.
The presence of true friends adds value to your life and fosters growth and positivity. You have a healthy friendship that thrives on mutual respect and care, where both parties feel uplifted and inspired to be their best selves.
In stark contrast, a toxic friend is often self-absorbed, putting their own needs and desires above all else. They manipulate situations to get what they want, with little regard for how their actions affect your happiness.
This type of friendship can feel draining, leaving you emotionally drained and questioning your self-worth. Instead of celebrating your achievements, a toxic friend may resort to jealousy or criticism, undermining your confidence.
Toxic friendships can deeply affect our emotional and mental well-being, often leaving us feeling drained and undervalued. These relationships are characterized by manipulation, constant criticism, and lack of support, creating an environment where one party consistently takes more than they give.
The dynamic can include jealousy, competition, or even emotional abuse, making it difficult to feel safe and authentic. Over time, toxic friendships can lead to diminished self-esteem and increased stress, underscoring the importance of recognizing and addressing these unhealthy connections.
How Venus Debilitation Impacts Your Love Life
As we find ourselves in the midst of the annual Venus debilitation transit until September 18, it’s important to understand how this cosmic event tends to affect our love lives and relationships.
In astrology, debilitation refers to a planet being in a weaker or less favorable position in the zodiac, which affects its ability to express its natural qualities. When a planet is debilitated, it is limited in the expression of its positive qualities and may instead exhibit more challenging qualities. This concept is a key element in Vedic astrology (Jyotish), which emphasizes the dignity of the planets based on their positions in the zodiac.
Venus is considered weak in the sign of Virgo. Virgo, an earth sign ruled by Mercury, is associated with practicality, analysis and critical thinking. These qualities conflict with Venus’ natural inclinations toward love, harmony, pleasure, and artistic expression. This period can bring emotional instability, communication breakdowns and a need for introspection in your relationships.
But while a Venusian weakening is usually seen as a challenging or negative time for love and relationships, it can actually be a blessing in disguise. This cosmic event forces us to look deeper into the dynamics of our relationships and helps us identify areas that need attention or improvement.
When Venus is weakened, it strips away illusions and forces us to confront the realities of our romantic lives. By facing these truths, we have the opportunity to address unresolved issues, break unhealthy patterns, and communicate more honestly with our partners. This introspection can lead to a greater understanding of what we truly need and value in our relationships, paving the way for more authentic and meaningful connections.
Begin By Loving Yourself Unconditionally
The first person each of us learns to love is ourselves. And that’s exactly how it should be, although many of us seem to forget this fundamental truth as we navigate the complexities of life.
But if we don’t cultivate self-love, how can we expect to show genuine love and care for anyone else?
In our society, love is often misunderstood as an abstract “thing” that we either have or don’t have. This view is fundamentally flawed. Love is not just a passive state or a fleeting emotion; it’s an active, conscious choice. We must make self-love an integral part of our daily thoughts and actions.
Unfortunately, our culture is often harsh, judgmental, and narrow-minded. This societal backdrop can deeply affect our self-perception, making it easy to forget how to love ourselves. Many people experience moments of self-doubt or feel less than perfect.
This self-criticism can snowball and lead us to constantly put ourselves down. But this doesn’t have to be our reality. The foundation of all healthy relationships – romantic or otherwise – is unconditional self-love.
So how do we cultivate this essential self-love? It begins with simple affirmations. Remember that you are you – and that’s more than enough. Create a mantra that resonates with you and repeat it regularly. When you’re comfortable, try speaking directly to your reflection in the mirror. It may feel awkward at first, but it’s a powerful way to reinforce positive self-esteem.
Overcoming Your Inner Saboteur
Have you ever wondered why people sometimes try to ruin an ideal opportunity in their life, or deliberately sabotage a promising relationship?
Even though I have done thousands of readings over the years, I cannot help but still be surprised when I work with people who are in the process of sabotaging a wonderful relationship or alienating a loving, caring partner. Reading for people of all ages and walks of life around the world has shown me that this behavior is relatively common.
Not all psychic readings are about difficult relationships, difficult or cheating partners, or boring marriages. Sometimes they are about perfectly wonderful relationships that one of the partners is doing their best to destroy!
In these relationships, the saboteur consciously or unconsciously creates a toxic scenario or behaves in a dysfunctional way that will ultimately lead to a breakup. For example, the saboteur will begin to find fault with their partner, subtly push them away, or find reasons to walk away from the commitment.
Relationship readings for self-saboteurs often begin with them saying something like: “Well, things are rosy now, but they always start out that way,” or “Knowing my luck, she’ll soon get bored with me,” or “To be honest, things are so good with him, I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop!”
It reminds me of my grandmother, who was abandoned by my grandfather when my mother and her sister were very young. She used to say, “All men are gorillas!” I later realized that my mother had adopted the same mindset.
Reclaim Your Personal Power With ‘Sat Nam’
As a Kundalini Yoga teacher, I had the unique privilege of studying with Yogi Bhajan, the yoga master who introduced Kundalini Yoga to the Western world. Before he passed away in 2004, Yogi Bhajan gave me my spiritual name, Satya Kaur, which essentially means “princess” or “lioness” who embodies or strives to live by the principle of truth. It symbolizes a spiritual identity or path that focuses on integrity, authenticity, and the pursuit of spiritual truth.
Our soul identity is the key to our life journey and spiritual growth. For this reason, at the end of each Kundalini Yoga class, the teacher says “Sat Nam” to the students. The class then repeats these words back to the teacher. Because of the name Yogi Bhajan gave me, this mantra will always have a special place in my heart.
The phrase is a Gurmukhi term that translates to “Truth is my name” or “True identity.” It is used as a yoga mantra to center the mind, connect with one’s true self, and remind us of our true essence and reality beyond the physical and mental constructs of the external world.
Saying “Sat Nam” to others is similar to the greeting “Namaste,” which means “The divine in me bows to the divine in you,” or “The spirit in me salutes the spirit in you.” For me, sacred affirmations like “Sat Nam” and “Namaste” have even more power and meaning now in the dawning Age of Aquarius.
Embracing The Gift Of Empathic Insight
Being attuned to the emotional energies of others is a beautiful gift that many spiritual individuals discover and enhance along their spiritual journey. This gift facilitates connection with others and provides insights into both others and ourselves.
While this empathic ability can bring profound understanding, it can also lead to anxiety. Feeling others’ emotions deeply may prompt self-reflection, causing concern about the impact of our actions on others and fear of judgment. Societal pressures become more intense, especially when expressing unconventional opinions, making those on a spiritual path feel isolated or misunderstood during a spiritual awakening.
How can we balance this empathic insight with personal expression and development?
Navigating meaningful relationships becomes challenging as our perspectives expand. Striking this balance requires self-reflection and working towards a more whole and heart-centered way of living.
Maintaining an open mind while expressing our own understandings is like a tightrope walk. We don’t want to become closed-minded, yet we need to articulate our perspectives and advocate for what we believe is right. A spiritual life is a journey of constant growth and understanding. Plateaus and challenges are part of the path, requiring breakthroughs to overcome.
Learn To Say No To Toxic People!
Do you allow others to steal your energy with their drama and demands? If so, you may want to reconsider how you deal with them, because it is very unhealthy physically, mentally and spiritually to be around negative people and force yourself to do things you don’t want to do.
Protecting your energy field from toxic people and situations is more important than you may realize. They can have a profound effect on our overall well-being. Physically, the stress and negativity can lead to various health problems, such as elevated blood pressure, a weakened immune system, and disrupted sleep patterns. Chronic stress can also contribute to the development of more serious health conditions over time.
Emotionally, exposure to toxic people can lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Overly demanding people tend to be self-centered, manipulative, abusive, and lacking in empathy. They disrespect emotional and physical boundaries and undermine your self-esteem. Constant exposure to such people can leave you feeling emotionally drained and manipulated, and undermine your confidence and sense of self-worth, affecting your emotional resilience and ability to cope with life’s challenges.