recovery
Substance Abuse Destroys Relationships And Families
We all put a lot of time, effort, and resources into our relationships. From dating to marriage and parenthood, each stage comes with its own mix of joys and challenges. But amidst these milestones, it’s natural to ask: Is our relationship nurturing our spiritual well-being?
Think about the impact your partner has on your mental health and spiritual well-being. Is your relationship deepening your connection with God, Source, Spirit, or the Divine? Is it nurturing and protecting your children and loved ones? Or do you feel a subtle drift away from what really matters?
It’s a common scenario — an intimate relationship starts to fade as priorities shift. Maybe your partner chooses time with friends over quality family moments. Perhaps hobbies or habits take over, eroding intimacy and trust.
This isn’t just a personal story; it’s a broader reality with serious consequences. Children left wondering where a missing parent is, while the other struggles alone as a single parent, trying to juggle too much. This absence of care and nurture affects children’s personal and spiritual growth, leaving lasting echoes into their adulthood.
Alcohol and drug abuse often sneak into many of these situations, silently corroding relationships and families from within. In my spiritual work, I’ve met many souls grappling with failing marriages and domestic chaos overshadowed by substance abuse and addiction.
If you’re stuck in such a relationship, ask yourself why you’re staying. Love shouldn’t coexist with self-destruction. If your partner’s commitment wavers, consider where your spiritual path meets theirs. Sometimes, the toughest choices lead to healing.
Find Your Rainbow In Troubled Times
There are days when it seems like the storm winds and rain in your life will never stop. Those days when your mind is filled with shadows and your heart is heavy. When a grief or a broken heart seems like a never-ending wound.
But trust me. One day soon you will walk out into the sunshine and see another beautiful rainbow! You will look at the colors of a perfect rainbow after a destructive storm of heavy rains and gasping winds, and you will know that all is well.
The storm may sometimes seem never-ending, but we always find a rainbow of promise on the other side. Then you will see the majesty of the spectrum of colors and the great arc that delights the sky. And if you follow that wondrous curve carefully, you may even find the pot of gold at its end!
In that perfect moment, you will forget the sadness and despair you felt before. The heaviness in your heart will be gone and you will be reminded that nothing is lost forever. The rainbows of life will always bring new moments, a new day, a new beginning. This is Spirit’s promise to us.
Since the dawn of time, rainbows have captured the imagination and beliefs of people in different cultures as a divine symbol of hope, healing, protection and rebirth.
My Healing Journey From Trauma To Spiritual Calling
Many years ago, a seemingly random accident changed the course of my life forever. As I traveled the country speaking to various corporate audiences in different cities, one fateful event brought about a profound change.
On that pivotal night, a woman arrived late for my presentation. While everyone was watching an introductory video, I asked her if she had filled out a raffle ballot. When I learned that she hadn’t, I offered to get it for her from the entrance to the hall.
Reaching the hallway doors meant walking between an audio speaker and the first table of guests. As I walked toward the exit doors, signaling to some in the audience that I would return shortly, I had no idea of the terrible events that were about to unfold.
Commercial audio speakers usually have a three-legged base, similar to a camera tripod, to keep the legs out of sight. But at this venue, the speakers had a different, wider type of base, with chrome spokes extending horizontally just above the floor, which the well-meaning organizers had hidden under black fabric. On my way to the doors, I tripped over one of those hidden metal bars!
The impact was severe – I dislocated my shoulder, breaking the bone into four pieces, shattered my knee, and my foot, caught in the fabric, twisted upside down over the bar. The resulting whiplash jammed my head to the left and slightly upward, immobilizing my entire left side.
Transform Your Life With Sustainable Resolutions
Every new year, I hear my clients complain about what they hope to change about themselves, what they want to change about themselves, or what they should be changing about themselves.
I then ask them why they are not claiming their power to change right now?
You do not have to wait until the New Year or some other major life event to make a change in your life. Once you’ve decided on a new path or course of action, the key is to stick with it for the long haul, taking small steps every day.
The Japanese call this kaizen, a philosophical concept that emphasizes continuous improvement, often in small increments. The idea is that by making consistent progress, even if it is just a little bit each day, you can eventually achieve significant results.
Sustainability should be the ultimate goal of whatever you decide to change in your life. While New Year’s resolutions are all noble and lofty, you have to acknowledge the inherent resistances and blockages you carry within and agree to be patient with yourself in order to ultimately get there.
I’m still working on some New Year’s resolutions I made in 2016. Do I look back in horror and say, “Why is it taking so long?” or “I really should be doing better!” Sometimes, yes! Do I use that as an excuse to backslide, fall off the wagon, or throw in the towel? Not at all, mostly because I’ve come to realize that if I hadn’t decided years ago to make those resolutions to make powerful changes in my life, I’d still be where I was, or worse. I’d be living a life of regret, not progress.
The Exit Points In Our Soul Plan
I believe that we have access to several ‘exit points’ throughout our lives. These are moments when our spirit or soul can separate from its physical form to return to the non-physical. It is said that we are given a few such exit points in our lifetime.
Planet Earth is not our primary home. I like to think of our physical existence in this world as a challenging ‘schoolroom’. This physical life journey can be very difficult at times, and I find that it makes things a little easier if we can look at it from this perspective.
I have yet to meet a person who has had a complete fairytale existence in their life. We have all had some magical moments, but not necessarily as magical as some far-fetched novels or films might portray. Sometimes we feel like we’re banging our heads against the wall just to survive on a daily basis, physically, financially or emotionally, but deep down we all have a built-in survival instinct to stay and complete what we incarnated to do.
Exit points are moments when we have the free will choice to stay in this physical world or return to the non-physical. These moments of choice can be a major health emergency, a near fatal accident, a traumatic event in which we are exposed to extreme danger, and so on. It is usually one of those profound life experiences that make us feel very lucky to still be alive!
Healing From A Relationship Break-Up
Breaking up with someone can be one of the most difficult experiences in life, especially when it is a long and deeply meaningful relationship. It can feel impossible to see any future without that person and very difficult to move on and find joy in life again.
I find many of my clients do not realize that dealing with a break-up or divorce is very similar to processing the bereavement and grief associated with the passing of a loved one. It is often accompanied by agonizing sorrow, intense feelings of despair, and an all-encompassing sense of loss and confusion.
According to clinical psychologist Dr. Tricia Wolanin it is actually “the death of a relationship, hopes and dreams for the future. The person we are losing was a big part of our world and therefore has taken up so much of our mental and heart space.”
It is however possible to recover, heal and move on after any breakup or divorce. In my work I have found the following strategies to be helpful for clients who go through this kind of life challenge.
Avoid Major Life Decisions
It is usually not a good idea to make any important life decisions if you are working through the aftermath of a breakup. This includes changing your job or career, relocating, or making other drastic changes to your life. It is vital to take some time to heal and reflect on the situation before making hasty life-changing decisions that you may later live to regret.
The Simple Miracle Cure For Stress
While I was meditating the other day, the voice of an ancestor came to me. It was the spirit of a relative I had personally known when she was in this life. She said, “Why don’t you just rest a little bit honey? Everything is always easier and better after you take a day or two to just rest and recover.”
I cannot say I was surprised by this unusual visitation message. I had indeed been dealing with a lot of stress lately, and I tend to forget that what I really need to do sometimes is to simply stop. Just stop doing whatever it is I feel I have to do. I often do tend to take on more than I am actually required to, and then make matters worse by stressing about it. It’s a free will kind of deal.
My ancestor was right. A timeout would empower me to cope much better and see things in a different perspective. The truth is most of the recent stress in my life is caused by my thinking. It is mostly in my mind and not based in reality.
So, I decided to follow her advice and take a few days off. I turned off my negative thought process, stopped working for a few days, and found constructive ways to clear my mind and relax. I took out a library book to read for entertainment and enjoyment; played with my cats; cooked some delicious comfort food; meditated in the garden, slept late, and allowed myself to just simply enjoy some proper ‘me time.’
Well, it certainly worked like a charm! After just a few days, I felt invigorated, recharged, empowered, and in a much better state of mind. I now realize I had been depleted of energy and especially not getting enough sleep.