self-pity
What Reality Will You Create Today?
In this lifetime, it is important to remember that we are all the creators of our own realities, as well as the co-creators of our shared reality.
This means that as an individual we have the divine gift of free will. Free will is our personal power to make our own choices in life. It is one of the most important and valuable aspects of human existence because it allows us to determine our own fate and shape our own destiny.
Without free will, we would not be autonomous and responsible spiritual beings in human form. Instead, we would be robots, pre-programmed to act in a certain way. Being born with free will allows us to make moral choices, to love and be loved, and to create our own unique paths in life.
Of course, with free will comes responsibility and accountability. We are responsible for our own thoughts and actions, both good and bad. We must therefore think carefully about our choices and make sure that we are acting not only for our own highest good, but also for the greater good.
Free will also does not mean that we are completely free from the constraints of external circumstances and worldly influences. We also share a collective free will with the rest of humanity. Just as we create our own daily reality and shape our individual destiny, we also co-create a shared global reality with the rest of the world.
Transform Your Life With Sustainable Resolutions
Every new year, I hear my clients complain about what they hope to change about themselves, what they want to change about themselves, or what they should be changing about themselves.
I then ask them why they are not claiming their power to change right now?
You do not have to wait until the New Year or some other major life event to make a change in your life. Once you’ve decided on a new path or course of action, the key is to stick with it for the long haul, taking small steps every day.
The Japanese call this kaizen, a philosophical concept that emphasizes continuous improvement, often in small increments. The idea is that by making consistent progress, even if it is just a little bit each day, you can eventually achieve significant results.
Sustainability should be the ultimate goal of whatever you decide to change in your life. While New Year’s resolutions are all noble and lofty, you have to acknowledge the inherent resistances and blockages you carry within and agree to be patient with yourself in order to ultimately get there.
I’m still working on some New Year’s resolutions I made in 2016. Do I look back in horror and say, “Why is it taking so long?” or “I really should be doing better!” Sometimes, yes! Do I use that as an excuse to backslide, fall off the wagon, or throw in the towel? Not at all, mostly because I’ve come to realize that if I hadn’t decided years ago to make those resolutions to make powerful changes in my life, I’d still be where I was, or worse. I’d be living a life of regret, not progress.
The Spiritual Importance Of Releasing Resentments
I went out for lunch today and had a bad service experience with the waitress. It was as if she didn’t care much to listen to what I wanted. She seemed distracted and careless.
Two and a half months ago, I had a similar experience at another restaurant when the server packed the wrong items for me to take home. I felt ignored, even disrespected. Today’s experience brought back the same feelings and memories.
I was so upset that I decided I was not going to leave her a tip. But then, in the middle of my meal, while feeling angry and somewhat sorry for myself, I overheard a nearby customer calling her friend by the same name as my late mother.
This caused me to pause and reflect on my toxic thoughts about the careless waitress. You see, my mother was also a waitress many years ago. It was how she put food on the table and put us through school.
Perhaps today’s events were meant to remind me during the holiday season how many of us go through life with unhealed “mother wounds.”
Spirit now had my attention and proceeded to make me aware that my waitress had her own issues with her mother growing up, and that she is now a single mother herself, barely making ends meet. This realization instantly changed my perspective and my petulant attitude.
Comparison Poisons The Heart, Mind And Soul
When we are going through difficult times, we tend to compare our struggles and suffering to the lives of others and measure ourselves by their perceived happiness, joy and success.
We often do this these days by comparing our own lives to what others post on social media. Then we judge and mentally torture ourselves for not living up to other people’s highlight reels of happiness and good fortune.
Sure, it is sometimes beneficial to self-reflect and strive for more based on the examples of others who serve as our role models. However, when we indiscriminately compare our own life journey to everyone else’s, we end up diminishing our own uniqueness and value.
While social comparison can motivate us to improve and grow, it can also lead to toxic self-judgment, envy, resentment, and extreme unhappiness. Constantly focusing on the highlights of other people’s lives quickly becomes toxic and self-destructive.
However, this tendency is not a character flaw in some of us. In fact, it is a natural evolutionary instinct that we all have. Our ancestors survived by living in social groups. Our tendency to compare ourselves to others is therefore a very common human trait, rooted in our evolution as a species.
Kindness Will Transform Your Life
Recently, I have noticed that many of my clients are increasingly seeking spiritual guidance for loneliness and feelings of isolation. No matter what their unique circumstances may be, spirit’s response in these matters is always that the solution begins with ourselves.
We must be the change we wish to see in our world in order to live a more connected and joyful life. Yes, the world we live in these days can be very stressful and alienating, but that does not prevent us from being more kind and generous to others.
Whether it is a smile, opening a door for a stranger, saying thank you or have a nice day, giving a compliment, or making a small donation to a charity, these small gestures every day have a magical impact on our lives. Spirit says we have chosen to experience this life and it is part of our soul journey to go out and be the difference we wish to see in this sometimes difficult, chaotic world.
Being kind is a powerful daily reminder to ourselves and others of our interconnectedness; that we are all on this journey together. Whether it’s a small gesture of kindness or a grand act of generosity, the ripple effect of compassion creates a chain reaction that inspires others to pay it forward.
Finding Silver Linings On The Dark Days
The sky was dark this morning. Overcast, miserable, wet and windy. Not the best way to start any day.
To make matters worse, after several very busy days with readings, I had one of those rare “goose egg” days. Not a single client called me all day!
Halfway through my shift, I realized that my mind was starting to brew up all kinds of negative thoughts. Idle hands are indeed the devil’s workshop. Fortunately, I was able to nip it in the bud by the end of my shift. The last thing I needed in this miserable weather was to plunge myself into a pity party.
Instead, I gently coaxed myself back into a state of calm, centered inner peace and gratitude. After all, I have a lot to be thankful for in my life!
I also had to remind myself that I no longer have all my eggs in one basket. I have learned the hard way over the past few years to diversify my income, and I also have a nest egg in the bank for a rainy day.
Those of us who have been on a long and challenging journey to a better life realize that having a totally negative day is sometimes a necessary part of the process of self-improvement and greater fulfillment. If things were always easy and perfect, we would have no motivation to strive for anything better.
Random Acts Of Kindness
I was at the gym the other day, working out while feeling really sore and demotivated. It was about to rain and I was just feeling so uncomfortable and miserable.
As I reluctantly lay back in this machine to kick my legs out, I saw a woman limping over to another machine across from me. She was clearly struggling, but you could tell that she was determined, even though she was having a hard time. I thought to myself that I should not be so negative about my own situation because it was just a little muscle stiffness. That brave lady was obviously dealing with so much more.
I experience this kind of scenario all the time in life. Whenever I feel deprived, unlucky, or self-pitying, my guides remind me to count my blessings and check my privilege. Instead, I need to remember those who are truly in need and how much the less fortunate have to go without.
Did you know that an estimated 828 million people in the world go hungry every day? This means about one in ten people on the planet does not have enough food to meet their basic needs. You may be thinking, what can I do about it? Well, I can only speak for myself. I recently decided to donate a pound of canned goods or a bag of groceries to those in need for every pound of weight I lose. It keeps me in check and reminds me to be thankful that I have food on my table every day!