criticism
They Can’t Gaslight You If You Trust Your Gut!
Gaslighting can be a very destructive aspect of a toxic relationship. It basically refers to any form of “reality twisting” or “crazy-making” that is designed to confuse or manipulate the victim.
Gaslighting is used to gain power and control in the relationship by making the victim question their reality. The phenomenon is typically found in romantic relationships, but it can occur in all kinds of social relationships, including friendships, at work, and with neighbors.
Sometimes it’s done in an obvious way, right under the victim’s nose, but more often it’s done under the radar, and you don’t always know who’s gaslighting you, or even that you’re being gaslighted.
“Gaslighting” is a psychological term derived from the 1938 stage play Gas Light and its 1940 and 1944 film adaptations. The movie is about a husband’s attempts to systematically drive his wife crazy by repeatedly dimming the gas lights in their home, only to deny that it ever happened when the wife asks him if he also noticed it. Over time, he manipulates his wife to the point where she believes she is imagining things and loses her mind.
Gaslighting is a common manipulation technique used by dictators, con artists, abusers, sociopaths, narcissists, and cult leaders. It’s done in such a way that the victim rarely realizes how much they’ve actually been brainwashed.
At first, the victim may have the idea that they’re not imagining things, but that someone else is doing this to them. They may even have an intuition about who that person is. However, the goal of gaslighting is to get victims to doubt these rational thoughts and replace them completely with the belief that there is something wrong with them, either mentally, spiritually, emotionally, or physically. The worst part, in my opinion, is that it makes you doubt your own intuition.
Keeping Shining Your Soul Light!
We all have a soul light — a radiant energy within us that’s eternal and uniquely ours. It shines brightest when we’re true to ourselves. Each of us is different for a reason, and when we embrace that — especially when others might not understand — we tap into the magic of who we truly are.
When we compare ourselves to others, we lose sight of our own path. We can end up pretending to be someone we’re not, and that’s exhausting. It sets unrealistic expectations and keeps us from letting our true light shine.
Have you ever felt like you don’t fit in? Like you’re just… different? The first step to finding yourself is to step back from trying to fit into other people’s boxes. Sure, it can feel lonely at first, but if you stick with it and trust the process, you’ll find a confidence that’s unshakable. You’ll discover a self-esteem that allows your talents and gifts to flourish.
So many of us get caught up in worrying about what others think. This happens a lot in relationships, especially in the beginning. Maybe you’ve been there: You start dating someone, everything seems great, and then out of nowhere they stop texting or calling. Days go by, maybe even a week, and you wonder, “What did I do wrong?
Our first instinct is usually to blame ourselves. We overthink every little thing, digging up all our insecurities and past hurts. Sometimes it’s like a flood of old memories, bringing back childhood moments or difficult family dynamics. It’s draining, and honestly, it’s not helpful.
Shield Your Dreams From The Naysayers
I’m in the midst of a major shift in my life – a bold leap forward that promises transformative and exciting changes for me and my family.
It is taking a lot of my time and requires a lot of work and personal sacrifice, as there are many moving parts that need to align to make it all happen. However, I know it will work and I trust in spirit’s guidance and divine timing. I’ve successfully navigated similar situations before in my life, so I’m confident it can be done.
As is often the case in these situations, I find myself surrounded by people who are projecting their fears and limitations onto me and my goals. Based on conversations with friends and clients who are supportive and encouraging, this seems to be a common pattern. What is clear to me is that these are people who have chosen to live very different lives from mine.
For example, I have a relative who has always lived in fear and has repeatedly tried to discourage me from every endeavor I’ve ever pursued — almost all of which have been successful. The few that have not worked out for the best I consider valuable life lessons.
I started my first business when I was 26 years old. This family member scoffed at me, saying it was too risky and that I was wasting my time and money. Well, that business ended up paying more than just my bills for over a decade, while many of my peers spent the best years of their lives in soul-destroying dead-end jobs. It allowed me, for example, to buy two houses and several new cars, and best of all, I loved what I was doing!
Ask Spirit For Patience This Holiday Season
The holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration. But for some of us, it can also be a time of tension, distress, and intense emotions.
Instead of being a time of gratitude, love, and connection, for some of us the holidays mark the resurfacing of old family conflicts, unresolved tensions, and the weight of others’ overwhelming expectations or criticisms.
These challenges often lead to frustration, sadness, anger, or feelings of being overwhelmed, turning what should be a time of love and belonging into one that underscores where our relationships with loved ones are most strained.
At this point, asking spirit or your higher power to help you cultivate the virtue of patience becomes a powerful way to stay grounded and centered.
Patience isn’t just about enduring difficult moments; it’s about being aware of those moments and choosing to respond with grace and dignity rather than impulsively. When tensions rise — perhaps during a family dinner where conversations may become heated or awkward — it is easy to fall back on old patterns and habitual responses. Asking for spiritual support and protection in these moments, however, can provide a higher perspective and an empowered response.
Whether it’s through a silent prayer, a few deep breaths, whispering your favorite mantra, or simply making a conscious call for help in your mind, spiritual presence can help you pause, step back, ground and center, and approach the situation calmly and with more compassion — for yourself and others.
The Essential Spiritual Practice Of Self-Love
The first person each of us is meant to love is ourselves. But somewhere along the way, many of us forget or overlook this essential form of love.
In a world that tends to reward judgment and criticism while valuing perfectionism and material success, many of us become estranged from our own worth and divine essence by falling into these societal patterns of self-judgment and negativity.
To make matters worse, what most people caught in this web of self-criticism do not realize is that unconditional self-love is the very foundation of our soul journey in this lifetime. In fact, it is the essential spiritual practice for a more joyful, deeply meaningful existence and a cornerstone of our spiritual evolution.
We often find ourselves caught up in self-doubt, judgment, and the pursuit of external validation. These patterns hinder our connection to our true essence and limit our ability to radiate divine love and compassion. Embracing unconditional self-love frees us from these limitations and allows us to step into our authentic power.
This journey begins with self-awareness and compassion. By observing our thoughts and feelings without judgment, we can identify the limiting beliefs and negative self-talk that have shaped our perception of ourselves. With gentle understanding, we can release these self-imposed chains and replace them with affirmations of self-worth and acceptance. When we practice self-compassion, we create a safe space for ourselves to heal and grow, embracing our imperfections as part of our unique journey.
Toxic Friendships: End It, Or Mend It?
Like all relationships, friendships have their ups and downs, testing the bonds that bind us together.
A true friend is someone who genuinely wants the best for you, celebrates your victories, and supports you through challenges. They offer encouragement, share your joys, and lend a sympathetic ear during difficult times.
The presence of true friends adds value to your life and fosters growth and positivity. You have a healthy friendship that thrives on mutual respect and care, where both parties feel uplifted and inspired to be their best selves.
In stark contrast, a toxic friend is often self-absorbed, putting their own needs and desires above all else. They manipulate situations to get what they want, with little regard for how their actions affect your happiness.
This type of friendship can feel draining, leaving you emotionally drained and questioning your self-worth. Instead of celebrating your achievements, a toxic friend may resort to jealousy or criticism, undermining your confidence.
Toxic friendships can deeply affect our emotional and mental well-being, often leaving us feeling drained and undervalued. These relationships are characterized by manipulation, constant criticism, and lack of support, creating an environment where one party consistently takes more than they give.
The dynamic can include jealousy, competition, or even emotional abuse, making it difficult to feel safe and authentic. Over time, toxic friendships can lead to diminished self-esteem and increased stress, underscoring the importance of recognizing and addressing these unhealthy connections.
Letting Go Of Guilt
We all like to be seen as good people, and it can be deeply unsettling when others perceive us otherwise. When we find ourselves in a disagreement with a dear friend or colleague and take the blame for something we’re not responsible for, it’s natural to feel unhappy.
Spirit teaches that while it’s important to own our actions and the roles we play in conflict, guilt only serves to amplify feelings of remorse. If we allow guilt to fester, we may begin to believe that we are “bad” people who do not deserve happiness and success.
This is far from the truth. We are human, and human beings have the ability to change. Our actions may not always be right, but that doesn’t mean we are inherently bad or deserving of punishment.
Making mistakes is part of being human, and sometimes we need to adjust our responses, especially in challenging situations, in order to grow and improve. Spirit suggests that this is a much healthier perspective.
However, taking this “healthy approach” is often easier said than done. We’ve grown up in a world where elders, peers, and society define what is good and bad – even when they’re not always right. This can lead us to judge ourselves harshly and feel unnecessary guilt.
Many traditional spiritual teachings emphasize the importance of forgiveness, both of oneself and of others. In Christianity, for example, the concept of repentance is central; believers are encouraged to confess their sins, seek divine forgiveness, and then release their guilt, trusting that God’s grace has absolved them.