criticism
The Essential Spiritual Practice Of Self-Love
The first person each of us is meant to love is ourselves. But somewhere along the way, many of us forget or overlook this essential form of love.
In a world that tends to reward judgment and criticism while valuing perfectionism and material success, many of us become estranged from our own worth and divine essence by falling into these societal patterns of self-judgment and negativity.
To make matters worse, what most people caught in this web of self-criticism do not realize is that unconditional self-love is the very foundation of our soul journey in this lifetime. In fact, it is the essential spiritual practice for a more joyful, deeply meaningful existence and a cornerstone of our spiritual evolution.
We often find ourselves caught up in self-doubt, judgment, and the pursuit of external validation. These patterns hinder our connection to our true essence and limit our ability to radiate divine love and compassion. Embracing unconditional self-love frees us from these limitations and allows us to step into our authentic power.
This journey begins with self-awareness and compassion. By observing our thoughts and feelings without judgment, we can identify the limiting beliefs and negative self-talk that have shaped our perception of ourselves. With gentle understanding, we can release these self-imposed chains and replace them with affirmations of self-worth and acceptance. When we practice self-compassion, we create a safe space for ourselves to heal and grow, embracing our imperfections as part of our unique journey.
Toxic Friendships: End It, Or Mend It?
Like all relationships, friendships have their ups and downs, testing the bonds that bind us together.
A true friend is someone who genuinely wants the best for you, celebrates your victories, and supports you through challenges. They offer encouragement, share your joys, and lend a sympathetic ear during difficult times.
The presence of true friends adds value to your life and fosters growth and positivity. You have a healthy friendship that thrives on mutual respect and care, where both parties feel uplifted and inspired to be their best selves.
In stark contrast, a toxic friend is often self-absorbed, putting their own needs and desires above all else. They manipulate situations to get what they want, with little regard for how their actions affect your happiness.
This type of friendship can feel draining, leaving you emotionally drained and questioning your self-worth. Instead of celebrating your achievements, a toxic friend may resort to jealousy or criticism, undermining your confidence.
Toxic friendships can deeply affect our emotional and mental well-being, often leaving us feeling drained and undervalued. These relationships are characterized by manipulation, constant criticism, and lack of support, creating an environment where one party consistently takes more than they give.
The dynamic can include jealousy, competition, or even emotional abuse, making it difficult to feel safe and authentic. Over time, toxic friendships can lead to diminished self-esteem and increased stress, underscoring the importance of recognizing and addressing these unhealthy connections.
Letting Go Of Guilt
We all like to be seen as good people, and it can be deeply unsettling when others perceive us otherwise. When we find ourselves in a disagreement with a dear friend or colleague and take the blame for something we’re not responsible for, it’s natural to feel unhappy.
Spirit teaches that while it’s important to own our actions and the roles we play in conflict, guilt only serves to amplify feelings of remorse. If we allow guilt to fester, we may begin to believe that we are “bad” people who do not deserve happiness and success.
This is far from the truth. We are human, and human beings have the ability to change. Our actions may not always be right, but that doesn’t mean we are inherently bad or deserving of punishment.
Making mistakes is part of being human, and sometimes we need to adjust our responses, especially in challenging situations, in order to grow and improve. Spirit suggests that this is a much healthier perspective.
However, taking this “healthy approach” is often easier said than done. We’ve grown up in a world where elders, peers, and society define what is good and bad – even when they’re not always right. This can lead us to judge ourselves harshly and feel unnecessary guilt.
Many traditional spiritual teachings emphasize the importance of forgiveness, both of oneself and of others. In Christianity, for example, the concept of repentance is central; believers are encouraged to confess their sins, seek divine forgiveness, and then release their guilt, trusting that God’s grace has absolved them.
Embracing The Gift Of Empathic Insight
Being attuned to the emotional energies of others is a beautiful gift that many spiritual individuals discover and enhance along their spiritual journey. This gift facilitates connection with others and provides insights into both others and ourselves.
While this empathic ability can bring profound understanding, it can also lead to anxiety. Feeling others’ emotions deeply may prompt self-reflection, causing concern about the impact of our actions on others and fear of judgment. Societal pressures become more intense, especially when expressing unconventional opinions, making those on a spiritual path feel isolated or misunderstood during a spiritual awakening.
How can we balance this empathic insight with personal expression and development?
Navigating meaningful relationships becomes challenging as our perspectives expand. Striking this balance requires self-reflection and working towards a more whole and heart-centered way of living.
Maintaining an open mind while expressing our own understandings is like a tightrope walk. We don’t want to become closed-minded, yet we need to articulate our perspectives and advocate for what we believe is right. A spiritual life is a journey of constant growth and understanding. Plateaus and challenges are part of the path, requiring breakthroughs to overcome.
Protect Yourself From Energy Vampires
People have the power to either energize or drain us because we are all energetic spiritual beings in human form. This is especially true if you are highly sensitive and empathic.
Energy vampires are people who mostly unintentionally drain or ‘steal’ the energy of others, leaving everyone they interact with feeling mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually drained, even depressed.
Although they may not be intentionally malicious or evil, their dysfunctional personalities and toxic behavior patterns can have a detrimental effect on our health and well-being.
Energy thieves are everywhere, from the workplace to our social circles. Understanding their effects and protecting yourself from their toxicity is critical to mental and emotional well-being.
It is important to recognize the signs and patterns in your interactions with these people. There are many signs that you may be the victim of an energy vampire. Some of the most common indicators include feeling drained or exhausted, having a change in mood or energy level, or difficulty concentrating or making decisions after spending time with someone. You may also feel that you are always giving and never receiving from someone, or that you are being used or manipulated by them.
The Spiritual Importance Of Releasing Resentments
I went out for lunch today and had a bad service experience with the waitress. It was as if she didn’t care much to listen to what I wanted. She seemed distracted and careless.
Two and a half months ago, I had a similar experience at another restaurant when the server packed the wrong items for me to take home. I felt ignored, even disrespected. Today’s experience brought back the same feelings and memories.
I was so upset that I decided I was not going to leave her a tip. But then, in the middle of my meal, while feeling angry and somewhat sorry for myself, I overheard a nearby customer calling her friend by the same name as my late mother.
This caused me to pause and reflect on my toxic thoughts about the careless waitress. You see, my mother was also a waitress many years ago. It was how she put food on the table and put us through school.
Perhaps today’s events were meant to remind me during the holiday season how many of us go through life with unhealed “mother wounds.”
Spirit now had my attention and proceeded to make me aware that my waitress had her own issues with her mother growing up, and that she is now a single mother herself, barely making ends meet. This realization instantly changed my perspective and my petulant attitude.
Breaking Free From A Toxic Family Curse
Over the past year and a half, I have been working with a client who grew up in one of the most toxic families I have ever encountered in my work. It has been a long time since I have been so moved by a client’s tragic story and ancestral legacy. With her permission, I thought it might be helpful to share some of her experiences.
She was raised by an extremely narcissistic mother who manipulated and emotionally abused her for most of her life with belittling scapegoating and harsh criticism, until she finally managed to break free and set healing, healthy boundaries.
But once those long overdue boundaries were in place, she suddenly discovered that her siblings had taken it upon themselves to continue their mother’s toxic behavior toward her! While she thought she had finally found some peace in her life, and could safely confide in her siblings about her healing journey, she soon found out how wrong she was.
Until recently, she had openly shared her thoughts and feelings about her mother with her siblings. They, in turn, wholeheartedly agreed and confided that they felt the same way. As her younger siblings, they claimed to have endured similar abuse from their mother. No matter what they said or did, they were also constantly verbally attacked and criticized by her.
Meanwhile, none of her siblings claims were true. As the family scapegoat she was in fact the only one who endured all their mother’s abuse. I tried to caution her every time we did a reading, but she suffered betrayal blindness when it came to her siblings, in the same way she did for many years with her mom.