criticism
Walking Two Moons In Their Moccasins
To judge, or not to judge, that is the question. Now, even the least religious of Christians will tell you that it is not a good idea to stand in judgment of others. In fact, Matthew 7:1-5 clearly states: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” However, there is a little-known addition to this spiritual wisdom to be found in John 7:24: ” Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly.”
Wait a minute? Did Jesus not instruct us never to judge? Yes, he implored us not to judge, but he also asked us to filter our experiences through the wisdom of spirit, or the eyes of divine love, before making any judgment. Indeed, some sound judgment is necessary in life. If we never judge anything at all, we may potentially become doormats to others. That’s certainly not what any wise spiritual teacher would recommend. But we need to be sensible, humble and kind in the process. We must ask for divine wisdom and guidance when considering what we say to others, as well as ourselves.
Judgment is related to karma and the ‘golden rule,’ in that we receive back what we dish out. This is not good if we hold onto our rigidity, unable to see others’ points of view. But if we open our minds and see it from another’s point of view, then we will more fairly and compassionately balance our judgments. We must remember the Native American wisdom, “Don’t judge a man until you have walked two moons in his moccasins.”
Striving To Embody The Higher Self
The higher self, the soul, the spirit is the spiritually supreme, eternal aspect of our conscious existence that is unencumbered by the human ego and connected to the greater cosmic universe.
When people spiritually awaken, they begin to realize that we tend to constantly operate from the ego, with only subtle, mostly subconscious bouts of guidance and inspiration from spirit. They begin to feel the difference in their personal energy vibration when they are operating more consciously from spirit, but it is a challenge to consistently remain in this powerful state of divine alignment.
One’s life however becomes noticeably different once you manage to connect to the higher self on a more constant and consistent basis. You also become more circumspect about what you spend your time and energy on. Spiritual self-care and a conscious lifestyle becomes extremely important.
In the connected, aware state of steadily embodying the higher self we no longer feel the need, for example, to accumulate as many material things and status symbols as possible, and we no longer say yes to everyone and everything for the simple fear of missing out.
We also tend to choose a new tribe and begin to increasingly spend time with people who are also in a state of higher vibration. We also progressively lose our interest in dysfunctional, lower vibrational behavior, like criticism, pettiness, perfectionism, gossip, judgment and wanting to control and manipulate others.
When we are more permanently aligned with the higher self, we become more empowered as deliberate creators and are able to manifest our desires more profoundly. We also become more grateful for the daily little miracles of life and keenly present in every moment. And we become more in tune with our soul purpose and begin to fearlessly pursue our true passions.
You Don’t Have To Be Perfect
Whenever we are focused on a task at hand, whether it is career, business or personal, we tend to focus on our mistakes and worry about what we may be doing wrong. Will it meet expectations? Are we good enough? The loud voice of perfectionism in our ego mind is often saying, “You did not do it right, you did not do enough…you are not enough.”
But constantly striving for perfection and beating ourselves up when we cannot meet those impossible expectations, sabotages the very thing we are trying to achieve. It impacts every part of our lives and also affects people around us, including our friends, coworkers, family and life partners.
Setting unrealistic standards for ourselves and others leaves us constantly feeling disappointed in ourselves and let down by others, over and over again. The perfectionism we are striving for becomes front and center in our in relationships, our careers, our health and our overall well-being. The result is anxiety, low self-esteem, fear of failure, depression, and broken relationships.
Failed perfectionism leads us to constantly measuring our worth against others, and vulnerable to the opinions, criticisms, and judgments of others. Perfectionists are very concerned about what others will think or say.
Striving for perfection is also about a need for control, so that our lives and those we care about will work out perfectly as we had planned. But contrary to popular belief, perfectionism does not lead to lasting success and fulfillment.
The Paradigm Shift Of An Awakening World
Most people respond more strongly to negative than they do to positive news or events. No matter how hard some of us may try to live with grace and gratitude by looking at the brighter side of life, a piece of bad news, malignant gossip, or fear-inducing information is a lot easier to run with than good news. We also react to someone else’s bad behavior much more strongly than their good conduct. We seldom praise or sincerely compliment, but we are quick to judge and criticize.
Case in point is my own experience working as the curator at fine art galleries some years ago. Ten clients would be nice and easy to please, but if the eleventh person was having a bad day they would be the one to get most of my attention. I’ve since gotten a lot better at being able to tune out the negativity and drama resulting from low vibrational frequencies, but it still remains impossible for me not to be affected by it from time to time.
Due to our innate survival instinct as humans beings we are simply incapable of ignoring negativity – or in a more enlightened scope, not give energy to it. This is understandable, as our first instinct is usually to protect ourselves by knowing if bad things may be happening.
But, so many people seem to absolutely thrive on every possible fragment of negativity, fear or drama they can find. From messy family quarrels, feuds with neighbors, and rude, unkind behavior in public places, to the brutal, senseless wars that continue to be fought since time immemorial. Every bit of it is and has been based on human reactions to slights, hurts and trespasses – some of it petty and even imagined.
Make It Happen Every Day
We have the ultimate ability to forge our own spiritual path in this lifetime, regardless of perceived limitations. As life is lived, important karmic lessons are learned and it is always your free will choice as to how fully you embrace your surroundings and opportunities.
Your experiences will depend on the lessons you choose to learn, the people with whom you interact and the ultimate goals you envision achieving.
To make the most of this incredible journey, spirit invites us to implement the following strategies:
Learn from all your experiences. Rejoice in the ability to create your reality and celebrate your successes, but do not judge your mistakes, nor your supposed failings. Reframe it instead into lessons.
Rejoice in all accomplishments. Even the smallest achievements lead to much greater opportunities. Never criticize your lack of visible success.
Lead by example. Be your best self today and encourage others to do the same for themselves.
Be kind to yourself. Aim for personal balance so that you can give more freely to others.
Be of service. Give so that your heart becomes truly free. Take giant strides in life and make your mark with love and integrity. Don’t let life pass you by.
Evaluate carefully. Think and make wise choices. Step back from the precipice of judgment long enough to gain solid insight before making a definitive move. You are much stronger than you realize. When confusion reigns, ask spirit for support and guidance.
Your Outer Life Reflects Your Inner World
Everything that happens in the Universe requires our participation for the highest good of all, and everything we personally contribute to this process of co-creation always has its consequences, for better or worse. The people and situations we experience in our daily lives reflect our inner world.
Although the final outcomes of what we co-create with others is not always our choice, or solely our doing, but still reflects on us anyway. Why? Because energy is the language of the Universe, and the Universe will simply respond to what we emanate with manifestations that match our energies.
For example, if you don’t like yourself much and constantly put yourself down, you will continually have life experiences that match your own self-loathing energy frequencies. So, you may find yourself frequently being disrespected, judged, or criticized by other people.
Another good example is repetitive dysfunctional patterns in your relationships, such as always being the one who is being cheated on. Believing that your partners will be unfaithful, and always fearing for the worst, can become like a magnet for cheating in every new relationship. The negative expectations and fearful energy we put into a relationship from the very beginning will eventually catch up with us.
To break these toxic energy patterns, we have to enter a new relationship with an open, fearless heart, trusting that if the Universe guided us towards meeting this person, then there must be a good reason for it.
So, why not let go, and let Spirit, God, Source, Universe, the Divine guide you towards your highest good? Have faith, and just trust the process! If your own energies are confident, hopeful, and positive, then life around you will unfold organically as it must. Stop analyzing and trying to control everything, and allow life energy to flow where it will for your highest good.
Honor Your True Self Without The Drama
Many of people spend a good portion of their lives trying to be who they think others expect them to be. Although it is important for our own safety and peace of mind to conform and abide by society’s customs and codes of conduct, it is also imperative that we feel free to authentically express ourselves – as long as it is not detrimental to the well-being of others.
These days it can be treacherous to speak your mind or express your true feelings in just about any context, but the most troublesome of places to do this is on social media platforms, where faceless strangers often attack each other mercilessly, and at times for no apparent reason.
Instead of exposing oneself publicly to the vitriol and ill-conceived opinions of random strangers, it is best to be true to ourselves within our personal circle of influence. Being yourself and living and authentic life does not require us to announce our true thoughts and innermost feelings to the entire world.
Of course, expressing your truth to those closest to us can be equally difficult. One key to successfully communicating is to truly listen with respect and consideration to the views of others. Often, we do not really hear what is being said, because we are frantically thinking of our own response to what we assume they are saying.
Actively listening to someone explaining their position can be a real test of patience sometimes, but it usually pays off in the end by way of mutual understanding, conflict resolution, or compromise.
Disagreeing without hostility and aggression is an art in itself. The world we currently live in can be a tinder box at times, with people overreacting to even the smallest perceived slight. We cannot control the beliefs, words and actions of others, but we can certainly manage our own.
