conflict
Should You Get Back With Your Ex?
Getting back with an ex can be challenging, especially if it ended badly the first time around. On one hand, it can be an opportunity to repair the damage and make things work, while on the other it can be a difficult decision with a variety of potential pitfalls.
Should you get back with your ex? It depends on you, your ex, and your unique situation. The pros and cons of getting back together varies depending on the people involved, the nature of the relationship, and the current circumstances. The advantages, opportunities and challenges of getting back with an ex may include the following:
Familiarity
One of the main advantages of reconnecting with your ex is the familiarity. You already know each other, so you don not have to start from scratch. This can be a great advantage, as it allows you to jump deeper into the ‘new’ relationship without having to first discover each other’s likes, dislikes, habits, quirks, expectations, hopes and dreams.
Getting back with an ex can be a great way to re-establish a comfortable relationship. You already know how to communicate with each other, you know what the other person needs and wants, and you know how to make each other happy. This familiarity can be very comforting, especially if it’s been a while since you last saw each other.
Let Your Heart Lead The Way
It is hard to believe that we were all in a worldwide shutdown just a couple of years ago. It has been a difficult and traumatic time for us all, as is always the case with major transition and change.
The global pandemic has played a vital role in transforming the energies in our world. For years, the predominant energy vibration in society has been masculine. We were rushing around in a constant go-go-go mode: egotistically grinding, clashing, and vying for things.
Some of my clients would call me and ask why their friends and relatives have been able to manifest this or that, yet they have not? It was all about comparison, strife, and competition. But our world has since been experiencing a significant energy transformation. With the advent of the global pandemic a lot of changes happened, and very rapidly!
Signs of this energetic shift are now becoming more evident. When I connect with current societal energies, it comes through as much gentler and predominantly female. This is a significant and welcome shift, especially when it comes to manifesting.
Traditionally, much attention was put on thought and the cognitive mind. Manifestation books and programs emphasized how our thoughts, ideas and beliefs function like a magnet to manifest our desires. But what if I told you that the heart is more powerful magnet than the brain?
According to HeartMath Institute Director of Research Rollin McCraty, the heart generates a much more powerful electromagnetic field compared to the brain. “The heart generates the largest electromagnetic field in the body. The electrical field as measured in an electrocardiogram (ECG) is about 60 times greater in amplitude than the brain waves recorded in an electroencephalogram (EEG).”
Helping Children Navigate Divorce
When parents get divorced it is always difficult for the entire family. Navigating through this time is usually challenging. There is also no manual or guidebook for how to do things the right way, so parents have to figure it out as they go.
Same with the children. It can be very scary for them not knowing what to expect and sometimes feeling obligated to take sides. It can be a very sad, stressful time for children, especially when parents are so caught up in their disputes and drama that they lose sight of what is best for their kids. The kids are not the ones getting the divorce.
However, I believe most parents really do try to do their best to soften the blow and make it work for everyone involved.
Children tend to want to please their parents and not cause further upset. So, tend to not speak up. They sometimes suppress their feelings of hurt, resentment or fear. Sometime children feel like they need to choose one parent over another.
Everyone needs to feel they are being heard and their needs considered. It is therefore best to listen to all sides before making decisions. Going through this process can be tricky. You do not want your child to feel neglected or abandoned in the process.
Understanding your children’s needs and feelings, and dealing with it, is the first step into helping your child get through it with the least amount of trauma. If a parent finds this difficult to ascertain, then it is wise for them to get some professional help and guidance.
Being Your Strongest, Most Authentic Self
Many people tend to think that being vulnerable and open is a bad thing, because it makes them vulnerable to getting hurt in life and especially in relationships.
When someone disappoints or hurts us, whether deliberately or inadvertently, it is usually because they have deep wounds of their own that stems from their past, especially for their childhood. These unresolved traumas are often dormant and unconscious.
One might feel this is still no excuse to treat others poorly, or that they should know better. However, because these people typically have not done much inner work or self-healing to really know how to be in loving, happy, and functional relationships. I’m not condoning their bad behavior, but if they actually do not know any better, then how can one expect it from them?
I find people who are stuck in such patterns of hurting others are usually very much defensive and in denial. If you gently suggest what you may need from them, or bring up an aspect that the two of you could work on together to improve the relationship, they tend to instantly throw what you say back in your face and make it all about you. Suddenly, all of it is your fault.
This defensive behavior is a clear signal that this person has a lot of hurt, and is either fearful or unable to work through it. Therefore, if you bring up something that triggers their pain, they immediately see it as a threat. They feel attacked, or that they are being made a scapegoat.
Sound Vibration Heals Our Brain Chemistry
Thoughts have metaphysical power. Words, speech, singing and sound also have power. Everything we say, sing and chant has vibrational sound frequencies that changes the chemistry of our brain and the physiology of our body.
A positive sound vibration changes the brain to a calm, compassionate, highly intuitive state. Think of a baby laughing and how it brings joy to everyone who hears it.
A negative sound vibration abruptly shocks and damages the nervous system. Think of someone scratching the chalk board or yelling racist epithets, and how both make you nervous and angry.
We can actually improve our health with positive vibrations in the form of mantras. A mantra is a set of words, with a positive meaning that also has a positive vibration. When repeated over and over, this vibration permeates every cell of the body, igniting, healing and repairing these cells. It moves through every muscle, bone and organ.
This process changes the entire energy field, aura, and expands it. Done with enough practice and an open heart and mind it can increase our light to the point where we can heal ourselves or help others to heal.
Have you ever walked into a silent room and felt that there had been a conflict between the people who have been there, before you arrived? That vibration, positive or negative, leaves an energetic residue and is absorbed by everyone entering into it, unless that person has increased their vibration to the point where they become psychically impervious to other’s negative energies.
Faith Holds Strong When Trouble’s Near
When we experience the loss of a loved one, or grief of some kind, faith is the one thing that helps us stay grounded and keep our sense of purpose.
When one door closes another one truly does open. Sometimes it’s the birth of a baby, or the beginning of a new relationship, or simply a new venture, discovery, or opportunity. Whatever it is, faith will give us what we need to keep ‘plucking along’.
Faith enables us to find new things, to give us something to look forward to. It also offers us the opportunity to give back and contribute towards making humanity and our world a better place.
To just do nothing is a complete waste of time and we are merely taking up space for no reason. So, we must keep going, even though things may seem to be at a standstill. You may be going through depression or whatever it may be, but it could also be a golden opportunity.
Often, when there is a family crisis, for example, emotions get charged and people sometimes will say things they later regret. Angry people too often take unnecessary risks, instead of waiting until the storm is over.
My advice is to not waste time and energy on arguments or disagreements. Just hold on to your point of view and add a dash of patience. Try to always be in complete control of your emotions and see things as they really are.
The Paradigm Shift Of An Awakening World
Most people respond more strongly to negative than they do to positive news or events. No matter how hard some of us may try to live with grace and gratitude by looking at the brighter side of life, a piece of bad news, malignant gossip, or fear-inducing information is a lot easier to run with than good news. We also react to someone else’s bad behavior much more strongly than their good conduct. We seldom praise or sincerely compliment, but we are quick to judge and criticize.
Case in point is my own experience working as the curator at fine art galleries some years ago. Ten clients would be nice and easy to please, but if the eleventh person was having a bad day they would be the one to get most of my attention. I’ve since gotten a lot better at being able to tune out the negativity and drama resulting from low vibrational frequencies, but it still remains impossible for me not to be affected by it from time to time.
Due to our innate survival instinct as humans beings we are simply incapable of ignoring negativity – or in a more enlightened scope, not give energy to it. This is understandable, as our first instinct is usually to protect ourselves by knowing if bad things may be happening.
But, so many people seem to absolutely thrive on every possible fragment of negativity, fear or drama they can find. From messy family quarrels, feuds with neighbors, and rude, unkind behavior in public places, to the brutal, senseless wars that continue to be fought since time immemorial. Every bit of it is and has been based on human reactions to slights, hurts and trespasses – some of it petty and even imagined.