loss
Praying For Your Departed Loved Ones
A client recently asked me if there is any benefit to praying for a loved one who has passed away? Does it make a difference in their transition to their new plane of existence? Can it somehow assist them in their continued existence in the afterlife? Can they even hear us?
We can absolutely connect with the spirits of those who have passed on, although it may sometimes feelas if they cannot hear us. Whether we are praying for them, talking to them, or simply grieving for them, we are connecting with them on a spiritual level and they are hearing us.
In fact, praying for our deceased loved ones has a very positive effect on their soul journey and they deeply appreciate it.
Some people believe that when we die, we go to some blissful realm of perfect existence where all our problems and karmic debts are instantly resolved, or left behind on the earth plane for others to deal with or pick up the pieces. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Most of us will pass away someday with some unresolved issues, negative feelings, resentments, grudges, or regrets that we will need to continue to work on in the afterlife. Of course, some of us will have much more to work on than others. Just because we leave this physical world does not mean that we are free of all our responsibilities and no longer accountable for anything or anyone.
It is therefore helpful to send our prayers to departed loved ones to help them with whatever spiritual or karmic “baggage” they may be taking along with them on their journey to the other side. Although they may leave behind symptoms of illness or financial debt, for example, their spiritual ailments will still need to be healed.
Always Feel Free To Own Your True Feelings
Has anyone ever told you that you are too happy? Or has anyone ever told you that you smile too much? My guess is probably never.
So, why is it that whenever we experience negative emotions, be it grief, despair, or depression, we are often told that there is a time limit to such feelings and that we need to get over it. In today’s society, it is essentially also taboo to express feelings of loneliness, sadness, fear, or simply being unhappy.
My brother died at the tender age of 12 and left such a void in our lives that my entire family grieved his loss for decades. Fortunately, we were raised to accept this as a perfectly normal and natural process for us. We all understood that we would work through our feelings of grief and loss in our own way and at our own pace. We did not grieve according to a schedule or set of societal rules.
I find that a useful way to think about feelings and how to process them is to think of our emotions as being processed by our heart and mind like food is processed by our body. Just like food, we need to break down, digest, and assimilate the lessons and insights in our emotions to serve as growth “nutrients” for the soul.
Grieving The Loss Of Loved Ones With Grace
Few of us have not experienced the loss of a loved one, a parent, a partner or even a child. Most of us have also witnessed or experienced the many ways in which people try to cope with such an insurmountable loss.
Coping with the huge gaping hole that such a loss leaves in our lives can have a negative impact on people’s behaviour. Some turn to extremes: alcohol, drug abuse, overeating, prescription drugs, or any of the other things people use to numb their pain and deflect the overwhelming feelings associated with loss and grief.
What we ultimately learn is that there is no set time frame in which such profound pain can be dealt with. It can take weeks, months, years or even decades for some. But even when the worst is over, we never really get over the sense of loss. We simply learn to cope and get on with our lives, forever changed, as best we can.
However, the greatest tribute we can pay the loved ones we have lost is to grieve with grace and dignity. Abusing substances or indulging in other distractions may temporarily numb our pain, but how does that honour the memory of the one we professed to care so much about? It also does not allow us to confront and process our emotions in a healthy and constructive manner. Grieving is natural and necessary. When we try to avoid our grief, we miss out on opportunities for personal growth, self-reflection, and ultimately finding peace with the loss.
Why Some Souls Depart This Life Early
In over 15 years of doing spiritual readings, I’ve had to deal with some very difficult questions from clients who have suffered extreme loss or trauma.
One of the most heartbreaking, however, is making sense of the death of an infant, child, or young adult, sometimes after a cruel and very unpredictable death.
Grieving the death of a young person can bring up some of the most profound and challenging emotions. While it is never easy to address this kind of loss with grieving parents and relatives, Spirit has been consistent in its guidance over the years.
Although I have been spared the loss of someone so young in my own life, I am no stranger to it. I have supported many families in this regard over the years, both professionally and in my personal life.
The first time I realized how fragile life really is, was when I was only 12 years old. I was looking forward to the summer vacation from school. One of my classmates who lived down the street and her family had relatives visiting for the summer. Two of the visiting cousins were more or less our age, so I had a nice group of girl playmates for the season!
There was also the younger brother of the visiting cousins, who was only six years old. He was an adorable child with blond hair, bright blue eyes, and a freckled face full of mischief. He followed his two sisters, my girlfriend, and me wherever we went during those carefree days. I did not mind having him around and even encouraged the others to let him play hide-and-seek and many other childhood games with us.
A Christian Mystic’s Guide To Dealing With Pain
Our search for the meaning of pain, hardship, and suffering is a profound and enduring human endeavor.
Throughout history, our spiritual beliefs and religious teachings have helped us understand and find meaning in life’s challenges and painful experiences.
These interpretations provide comfort, guidance, and a sense of peace in the face of adversity as we learn that suffering has a purpose or can lead to spiritual growth, enlightenment, or a deeper connection with the divine.
Our spiritual quest to better understand pain is driven by a deep desire to make sense of life’s challenges and to discover how these difficult experiences fit into the larger tapestry of our existence.
Religions and spiritual wisdom traditions around the world offer different perspectives on pain and suffering, each with its own explanation for why these experiences occur and how they should be approached or understood.
These diverse perspectives all share certain common threads: that the origins of pain and suffering lie in the concept of duality; that there is meaning to be found in suffering; and that through faith, reflection, and spiritual practice we can transcend the pain caused by duality and connect with something greater than ourselves.
Find Your Rainbow In Troubled Times
There are days when it seems like the storm winds and rain in your life will never stop. Those days when your mind is filled with shadows and your heart is heavy. When a grief or a broken heart seems like a never-ending wound.
But trust me. One day soon you will walk out into the sunshine and see another beautiful rainbow! You will look at the colors of a perfect rainbow after a destructive storm of heavy rains and gasping winds, and you will know that all is well.
The storm may sometimes seem never-ending, but we always find a rainbow of promise on the other side. Then you will see the majesty of the spectrum of colors and the great arc that delights the sky. And if you follow that wondrous curve carefully, you may even find the pot of gold at its end!
In that perfect moment, you will forget the sadness and despair you felt before. The heaviness in your heart will be gone and you will be reminded that nothing is lost forever. The rainbows of life will always bring new moments, a new day, a new beginning. This is Spirit’s promise to us.
Since the dawn of time, rainbows have captured the imagination and beliefs of people in different cultures as a divine symbol of hope, healing, protection and rebirth.