What To Do When A Lost Love Lingers

Many of the readings I do are about love and relationships, and a good percentage of them are about past relationships that continue to linger in the hearts and minds of some callers.

For some people there are often constant, even obsessive thoughts about a former partner, a longing for a second chance, or bitterness and regret for time and energy that now seems wasted. The longer and more intense the relationship, the more battle scars and wounds there often are.

If it was a soulmate or twinflame connection, the aftermath can be especially devastating. The relationship has ended and the connection has been severed in this lifetime. This can be very painful. You know you gave it your all. You hung in there for years, or you made heroic efforts to ensure the survival of the relationship, but it did not work out as you had hoped.

If you are highly sensitive and intuitively aware, you may still be picking up the energy of your former partner, which can be very painful, disturbing and disruptive. Unresolved energetic connections can keep you stuck in a repetitive cycle of repeating the same pattern with that person, or put you on hold, unable to move forward in peace and confidence.

I am often asked, “Is it really over?” or “Does he still have feelings for me?” Of course, the answer depends on the unique circumstances.

On the grief scale, the loss of a meaningful relationship is right up there with the death of a loved one. Death is something we must accept, but endings can sometimes leave a very blurry line. It is important to gain clarity and perspective about what has happened and where your future happiness lies.

Every time your heart is broken, a doorway cracks open to a world full of new beginnings, new opportunities ~ Patti Roberts

This is where a reading with a trusted psychic can be very helpful. It can bring clarity, comfort and reassurance about choices and decisions made along the way.

Emotional Healing & Self-Care

The most important thing you can do when a relationship has ended is to support yourself in mind, body, and spirit. Tap into all the healing energy and social support you can. Surround yourself with positive, non-judgmental people. Trusted friends, family, and support groups can be a great resource during this time.

Don’t forget to take care of your health and well-being. A breakup can have a sledgehammer effect on your well-being. It’s an attack on your emotional body, and your physical body will soon feel the effects.

Breakups activate the body’s “fight or flight” response, leading to increased levels of stress hormones like cortisol. This can lead to symptoms such as shakiness, difficulty concentrating, and intrusive thoughts. Many people also experience disrupted sleep patterns and changes in appetite, either overeating or undereating, often turning to comfort foods.

Chronic stress from a breakup can weaken the immune system, making people more susceptible to illness. The emotional pain of a breakup also activates the same brain regions as physical pain, and studies have shown that heartbreak can temporarily enlarge the heart.

Research also suggests that divorced people have higher rates of chronic health problems such as heart disease, cancer, diabetes, and digestive problems. It can also lead to long-term mental health problems such as depression, anxiety, and substance abuse.

The relationship was an important part of your life. Now that it’s over, don’t neglect yourself. This is a time to affirm yourself and begin to rebuild your peace and happiness with a focus on self-care and self-esteem. Consider getting an energy healing session, a reading from a trusted source, or talking to a support group or therapist. Make it a point to prioritize your well-being every day.

Every woman that finally figured out her worth, has picked up her suitcases of pride and boarded a flight to freedom, which landed in the valley of change ~ Shannon L. Alder

Spiritual Practices For Healing

Engaging in spiritual self-care practices helps to facilitate healing and closure. Some recommended practices include

Cord-Cutting: Cord-cutting frees you from the energetic connections to your ex’s energy field that are still holding you back. A cord-cutting meditation, ritual, or healing session in which you energetically sever the connection helps you reclaim your freedom and inner peace. It also clears the way for new love connections to come into your life. Invoking Archangel Michael’s protection and support, or working with a skilled energy healer, can empower you to release lingering attachments so that you can move forward in your relationship life with clarity and emotional balance.

Dreamwork: Many people report that they continue to dream about their former partner long after the breakup. These dreams can feel like a continuation of the relationship, unfinished business, or even spiritual communication. If dreams of an ex are bothering you, consider setting an intention before you go to sleep. Ask your higher self or spirit guides for clarity or closure. Journaling about these dreams and their emotional impact can also be a helpful tool for processing unresolved feelings.

Karmic Resolution: Sometimes a relationship is part of a larger karmic cycle that needs to be completed. If you feel that a past love is still lingering in your energy field, it may be helpful to explore whether there are lessons that have not been fully learned. A past life regression, reading the Akashic Records, or deep meditation can provide insight into whether the relationship was a repeating pattern from a past life. Recognizing the lessons allows you to consciously release cycles that no longer serve your highest good.

Manifestation: Don’t get stuck in the pain or lost in the anger. Don’t sacrifice your future happiness for the past. Instead, shift your energy toward manifestation. Create a vision board for the kind of love you want to attract, write affirmations that reinforce self-love and self-worth, and trust that the universe is guiding you toward a brighter future. The energy you put out will shape what you bring into your life.

Salt Baths: A ritual bath with Epsom, sea, or Himalayan salt can help cleanse negative energy residue from the relationship, providing a sense of renewal and emotional release. Salt has long been used for its cleansing properties, both physically and energetically, making it an ideal tool for clearing emotional residue. As you soak, set the intention to wash away any sadness, regret, or attachments and allow the water to restore your sense of inner peace and balance.

Dear John Letter: Writing a heartfelt letter to your ex allows you to express unspoken feelings — whether they are love, pain, anger, or gratitude — without the pressure of an actual conversation. This process provides emotional closure by acknowledging the lessons learned from the relationship and honoring its impact on your personal growth. Once written, burn or bury the letter as a symbolic act of release, signifying your willingness to move forward without carrying unresolved emotions. Note: do not send the letter, detroy it.

Candle Ritual: Lighting a candle and meditating upon its flame can be a powerful practice for emotional healing and transformation. As you focus on the warm glow, visualize the flame dissolving any lingering attachments or sadness, making room for new love, peace, and self-acceptance. You can enhance the ritual by silently affirming, “I release the past with love and welcome healing into my heart,” allowing the candle’s energy to support your intention.

Crystal Work: Crystals can be valuable allies in the healing process, helping to restore emotional balance and strengthen your energy field. Rose quartz is known to promote self-love and emotional healing, amethyst enhances spiritual clarity and inner peace, while black tourmaline offers protection from lingering energetic connections to your ex. Holding these stones during meditation or placing them near your bed can support your journey toward emotional freedom and renewal.

Accept yourself, love yourself, and keep moving forward. If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down ~ Roy T. Bennett

False Hope & Sugar-Coating

When dealing with the emotional turmoil of a relationship breakup, it is crucial to seek guidance from reputable, ethical psychics who value truth and honesty over false hope and sugar-coating.

A breakup often leaves you feeling vulnerable, longing for clarity, and searching for reassurance about the future. Unfortunately, there are unethical practitioners who may take advantage of your vulnerable emotional state by offering you saccharine promises or guarantees of a future reunion with your ex that may or may not be true, much less in your best interest.

Getting your readings from untrustworthy sources can keep you stuck in a cycle of hope and disappointment, preventing you from moving forward. Some unethical practitioners even manipulate their clients into paying extra for expensive curse removals and love spells. This not only drains their victims’ emotional and financial resources, but also prevents them from fully embracing their healing journey and opening up to future relationship possibilities.

Professional psychics, on the other hand, provide readings that focus on truth, healing, and personal empowerment, rather than feeding you illusions that may prolong your emotional suffering. A reputable psychic will encourage self-reflection and help you understand the deeper spiritual, emotional, and karmic dynamics behind the breakup. Rather than fixating on external outcomes —such as whether an ex will return — they will guide you toward personal growth, self-love, and the ability to make empowered choices moving forward.

Trusted psychics recognize that healing and clarity come from courageously facing reality, not clinging to a fantasy. By choosing an ethical reader, you ensure that you receive guidance that is aligned with your highest good, allowing you to heal, release attachments, and open yourself to new possibilities without unnecessary emotional setbacks.

When navigating a breakup, it is important to find a psychic or medium who upholds integrity, honesty, and compassion — someone who empowers you to embrace the future with clarity and strength, rather than keeping you stuck in the past.

It is always important to know when something has reached its end. Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over ~ Paulo Coelho

Don’t Forget Self-Compassion

An important aspect that many people overlook during a breakup is self-compassion. They often focus on forgiveness, understanding, and healing, which are crucial, but they often neglect to extend the same kindness and understanding to themselves. It’s easy to get caught up in the spiritual practices of letting go and moving on, but forgetting to acknowledge and process your own pain can lead to prolonged emotional suffering.

Breakups can be very difficult to process, and it’s important to allow yourself to grieve, feel, and heal at your own pace. Remember that being spiritually aware also means being compassionate and patient with yourself during times of heartache.

Trust In Divine Timing

No matter what has happened, know that there is a future for you and your heart. Never give up on yourself. Trust that the universe works in divine timing. The pain of loss often precedes new beginnings. As you embrace your healing journey, learn the lessons presented, and strengthen your spiritual and emotional resilience, you are preparing yourself for the love and happiness that awaits you.

Love in its purest form is meant to uplift, heal and expand your soul. If a past relationship no longer aligns with your highest path, let it be a stepping stone, not an anchor. You are worthy of love and belonging, and as you heal, you make room for something more beautiful to enter your life. Never give up on yourself and your future beloved.