parents
Betrayal Blindness And The Family Scapegoat
I have a good friend who was raised by a mother who constantly belittled and talked down to her. She never defended herself, because she grew up believing that she deserved her mother’s abuse, because something was wrong with her causing her to always say and do the wrong things.
Once she graduated high school, she moved out of her mom’s house. Her life became much more peaceful for several years, until she started noticing that her brother was following in their mother’s footsteps by adopting the same kind of toxic, abusive language towards her.
It oddly became evident to her one year at Christmas time, when she gifted him a beautiful, crocheted blanket that she had been working on for many months and he rolled his eyes and made some disparaging remark about it. She then started noticing how pompous, ungrateful, and narcissistic he truly was. Growing up with him, she always assumed he just had bit of an ego or a macho attitude, but now that she had gained life experience and wisdom, she realized he was simply an abusive jerk.
Still, she chose not to criticize or judge him. In fact, she did the opposite, she encouraged his long-suffering partner to stay by his side and continue to support and love him, because she understood that he was also just a product of his upbringing, like herself. Meanwhile, he faithfully continued judging and belittling her. Because that is what he had seen their mother do all his life.
But one day, something inside her finally shifted. She had reached a point of no return and decided to start standing up for herself! Enough already.
An End-Of-Life Mediumship Experience
I have been doing mediumship work for over 40 years, but recently I received an unusual request I have never had before. I was asked to do a phone reading for a long-time client whose mom who was terminally ill and in hospice intensive care. My client said her mom could no longer speak, and she felt the need to communicate with her before she passed.
I have never done a mediumship reading under these circumstances, but I could hardly refuse my client’s plea. So, I agreed, despite not being entirely confident about how it would unfold.
As soon as I started to tune in, I saw a vision in my mind’s eye of a man holding both her mother’s hands. I described the physical appearance of the two people I was seeing, and the daughter then confirmed that it was definitely her mom and her mom’s brother.
The mother was very relieved to be able to reassure her daughter, as well as her life-long best friend, who was also present in the hospice room at the time, that she was finally ready to transition and return to her spiritual home.
Then I saw three angels standing behind the mother. They wanted to reassure those present that her crossing would be safe and easy, and that she would no longer be in so much pain.
When I perceive angels during readings, they appear to me exactly how one might expect them to look in the traditional Christian art sense, complete with wings and a glowing aura. However, I never see them with recognizable facial features and I always feel their presence first, before I see them.
Dealing With Ancestral Karmic Debt
When a loved one crosses over, they transcend this dimension to enter the next. In the spirit dimension we revert from human ego consciousness back to universal consciousness, and our awareness is no longer limited by time and space.
I like to think of our constantly evolving soul or spirit as ‘cookie dough.’ When we cross over and revert to the broader perspective of universal consciousness, our soul energy is like a ball of dough that has been proofing for a lifetime.
As the Universe, or the Divine Cookie-Maker, rolls out the dough of our returning soul, there will be some karmic ‘lumps.’ These lumps are the unwise choices, mistakes, transgressions, missed opportunities, failures, crimes, and sins for which we didn’t make amends during this lifetime. It then becomes our karmic debt.
Some of these karmic debts go back many generations and have become part of the ancestral legacy of our soul family. It has sometimes dire consequences for everyone we are spiritually connected to in this life and the next. It becomes a shared responsibility for the entire soul family, for which someone needs to step up at some point to break the cycle.
Making amends and striving towards karmic healing is therefore not just something we do for our own sake, but also for those that came before us, and especially for those who will come after us.
Our ancestors on the Other Side are also continually striving to resolve their karmic debts, and for this they may need our help and support. If we hold them, or ourselves, in a state of unforgiveness, they cannot move forward with their karmic healing, or the next stages of their soul journey.
It Is Never ‘Just A Dream’
People often say, “It was just a dream, it does not mean anything.” But in my experience our dreams always mean something, and sometimes it is profound.
Dreams serve important mental, emotional, and spiritual functions in our life journey. Our dreams help us to process and learn from our daily experiences, store memories and important information, master new skills, and manage our emotions. Dreams are also key to our inner guidance, spiritual expansion, karmic evolution, and soul growth. And some dreams are the key to healing trauma.
The first nine years of my life my family lived in a small town, until we moved to a much bigger and more bustling city. Soon after we settled in our new location, I began having the same dream repeatedly.
The content of the dream never wavered. I was back in our hometown, and I was standing frighteningly close to the edge of a large, deep lake. Then suddenly I was running away from a threatening bear chasing me. The intensity of this nightmare never changed, and I consistently woke up terrified.
Around the time I turned 14, it suddenly stopped, and I never experienced the dream again.
Years later, I researched the dream’s possible meaning. I then learned that water often represents emotion, while frequently dreaming about being chased is a sign of feeling stressed, anxious, worried, or fearful. In my dream, I was running away from the negative emotion, or trying to avoid it.
The Robin Outside My Window
Birdwatching has become a favorite pastime for me over the last year or two. This morning, I noticed a robin building a nest on one of the air conditioning units on a neighbor’s deck, directly opposite my window.
I was overjoyed! We’ve had very dry weather here in my state since mid-spring, causing robins to struggle finding nesting materials.
Some years ago, I found a newborn chick on a sidewalk while out for a walk. I could not tell for sure what species of bird it was, but it looked like it might be an American robin. I found no nest nearby to put it back into and had no idea what to do with it, but take it home. Sadly, it did not survive.
Since then, I’ve had some ‘robin guilt’ and wished I could have done more to save it. I suspect this stems from another robin incident, when I was growing up. Back then I also tried to care for older fledglings that ultimately didn’t make it. Should I have let nature take its course, instead of trying to take things into my own hands?
Last fall, after the breeding season ended, I purchased some mealworms and placed them by the forested ridge at the end of the complex where I live. The hungry robins were very appreciative, especially after the first frost. It warmed my heart! I plan to continue helping the robins around my apartment complex as the drought continues.
The deeper truth is that robins always remind me of my father. The Latin name for the American robin is turdus migratorius, because it is a migratory songbird that is free-roaming and very sensitive to environmental conditions. However, because they are highly adaptable, their migratory habits tend to be sporadic, even random.
Judgment Limits Your Soul Growth
So, let’s try a different attitude just for today – just so we can experience what it’s like to exist on a higher spiritual frequency and how good it feels to be connected to God, Source, Spirit, Higher Intelligence, the Divine.
To help bring yourself into spiritual alignment and to be a healthier, happier human being, mentally, psychically and spiritually, simply let go of analyzing and evaluating others. The only reason we do this is usually because we are trying to cover up the misalignments in our own life.
When we constantly criticize and judge ourselves and others, we are essentially keeping ourselves trapped in a life on low, shallow energy altitudes. Hence we hinder our soul from achieving wonderful growth.
Some of the unhealthiest, most miserable people I know tend to always judge. They constantly feel the need to analyze and pass judgment on others, and what is worse they often judge themselves much more severely! I mean, if you can’t see it in their aura, you can definitely see it in their face. The eyes are indeed the windows to the soul.
When we have sincere faith in a higher power we simply do not feel the need to constantly judge ourselves and others. When we judge others we only hurt and limit ourselves. Judgment, intolerance and fear hinder our soul growth. So, just for today try a less judgmental attitude. You just might like it! You may even find it’s better to live this way every single day for the rest of your lifetime.
Life is simply too short and precious to spend it indulging in so much judgment and negativity. So, stop blocking yourself from being the best version of you. Do not analyze and evaluate yourself and leave others in peace to deal with their own karma.
The Wisdom Of The Cuckoo
Over the past year, I have become fascinated with birds, particularly thrushes. They are small to medium-sized ground birds that feed mostly on insects and fruit. My interest began with the American robin, but soon branched out to other thrushes worldwide, such as the fieldfare, the Eurasian blackbird, and olive thrush of Southern Africa.
One peculiar species I accidentally stumbled upon is the well-known, and also notorious cuckoo. Apart from being famous as the key feature in ornate wooden clocks from Germany, the cuckoo is also infamous for being a ‘parasitic’ bird that lays its eggs in other birds’ nests.
Yes, the cuckoo does not raise its own young. Instead, it takes advantage of other bird parents by laying in their nests. Once the egg hatches, the cuckoo chick attempts to push the other bird species’ eggs out of their nest, thus monopolizing the surrogate parents’ energy. The cuckoo chick typically also grows much bigger than the natural offspring of its adopted parents.
Watching some videos of cuckoos online, I became aware of many negative comments on YouTube about these amazing birds. Many folks apparently choose to regard the cuckoo as a devious villain of the natural world. However, I don’t see it that way at all.
Being a co-parent myself, who had to depend on my ex-husband to provide much of the care for my two children when they were younger, due to my personal health challenges after a near-death experience (NDE), I feel empathy for the cuckoo’s eccentricity and the unusual value it brings to the animal kingdom.