insecurity
How To Deal With Toxic People
Toxic people can be incredibly difficult to deal with in both personal and professional relationships and can be detrimental to your personal happiness and well-being.
A toxic person is someone whose constant negativity and dysfunctional behavior causes drama in your life and drains you energy whenever they are around. Typical toxic traits include negativity, cynicism, apathy, lack of self-awareness, arrogance, entitlement, self-centeredness, domineering behavior, lack of empathy, being judgmental, dishonesty, anger outbursts, to name only a few.
The most extreme forms of toxicity includes personality disorders like antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic personality disorder. A personality disorder is a rigid, deeply characteristic way of thinking, feeling and acting that severely affects the person’s mental well-being, personal relationships and social life.
Toxic people can however be tricky to identify at first, as their dysfunctional traits and behaviors can be very subtle. Some of them are also very good at ‘gaslighting,’ which makes interacting with them even more treacherous.
Gaslighting is a very toxic form of manipulation, game playing, or crazymaking in which you are constantly being misled, confused, lied to, and made to question your own truth and reality. You increasingly feel unsure about the accuracy of your own memories regarding certain events and your personal opinions and perceptions of the world. You may even begin to think that you are to blame for the toxic person’s actions, or that maybe something is very wrong with you, or worse, that you are losing your mind.
Free Yourself From The Fear Of Rejection
A close friend and college, who is also a psychic medium, had a blind date set up by a friend a while ago. “I think the two of you would hit it off,” the match-making friend promised. Well, my friend and the mystery man initially texted for a couple of weeks and then decided to meet in person.
Due to Covid-19 recommendations at the time, they arranged to meet outside and ended up going for a three hour walk. The date went great! When it was time to part, the gentleman said he hoped they can meet again soon. He clearly seemed to like her a lot.
She agreed as they both seemed to enjoy each other’s company, but on the way home, her old fear of rejection resurfaced. She called me the next day to tell me how it went.
The first thing she said was that he seemed a great person. It was the first time, in a long time, that she had such a good time. But I could sense that something was not quite right. So, I asked her what was the matter?
“I think he is out of my league,” she bluntly said.
“What do you mean,” I exclaimed in surprise.
“Well, he arrived in a brand-new luxury car, while mine is an old jalopy! He is a medical professional, and I just do readings. I am also not smart enough, or pretty enough for a guy like him. My middle-aged body is certainly not what it used to be.
Vulnerability Grows Your Abundance Garden
Vulnerability is a critical element that determines our ability to receive from the Universe. I often tell my clients we may have to break a few eggs to save the dozen. Without ever taking the risk of making ourselves vulnerable there can be now growth, no progress, no expansion, and no abundance. This means if we dare to make mistakes, we eventually gain the ability to help more people, than if we kept ourselves covered and rigidly in control of how others see us.
Imagine yourself carefully harvesting chicken eggs and preparing to bring them to a farmer’s market for sale. But then you set off with a restrictive, limiting, fearful strategy of clasping those eggs frantically under one arm…for fear of dropping them all on the ground.
“I’m in complete control,” you proudly claim. But are you really?
Consider how tired your shoulders and arms would soon become, and how long it will be before some of those precious eggs are either crushed or dropped.
In the end, we usually give up on the idea of taking our eggs to the market, for fear of not being able to successfully complete the journey. Instead, we store those eggs in the refrigerator in the hope of feeling strong enough or muster enough courage sometime in the future.
But all is not lost, and it is never too late. We can circle back to something that is unfinished at any time, even if we initially felt we bit off more than we could chew. The Divine Feminine energy often works this way. Roundabout, yet sincere about eventually finishing the journey. She is thoughtful enough to improve herself and return with renewed vigor to what she started.
So, find it within yourself to return to that fridge and retrieve those stored eggs with renewed courage. Then once again set out to bring them to market. This time, you may just find it more manageable, and you may just make it all the way. There you may just be welcomed with open arms at the market…this time with all your eggs intact and everyone keen to purchase them!
The True Power Of Your Worst Nightmares
When I was 24 years old, I was a somewhat disempowered young lady who went to work for the city council. All the girls in the office had an active social life and a boyfriend, except me.
In fact, I was bullied for it and became a bit of a joke around the water cooler, to the extent that I could not properly concentrate on the task at hand and ultimately lost my job. Looking back, it was one of the best things that ever happened to me. But, at the time, it did not feel like it.
About a year ago, I started to have a recurring dream that I was 24 again, and sharing an office with the same mean girls, supervised by the same misogynist boss. But this time I had a very different mindset.
In my dream, the boss had criticized my work. So, I pick up the documents he complained about to, walk up to his office, put it on his desk, and tell him politely to type his own letters in future. I was going home now, because I am no longer prepared to put up with his nonsense.
Well, if only I had the same courage back in the old days, I might have suffered far less emotional anguish! I felt really empowered in the dream, and it brought me the realization that I no longer have to suffer fools and that I need to stick up for myself more often. However, the dream also revealed to me that I still had not entirely made peace with the past, otherwise the dream would not be recurring.
The moral of the story is that dreams do not only reflect how we are doing in the present, and how far we have advanced in life, but also what we need to do to work on ourselves to be even better in the future. How powerful and life-enhancing is that!
Another compelling dream I have been having of late is of myself flying a light hovercraft over the estate where I lived as a child. I faced several challenging, traumatizing things growing up there, including poverty and domestic abuse. However, this liberating dream confirms that I have managed to rise above those childhood setbacks and obstacles, and I am now in control of my own life and destiny.
Boldly Into The Future With Jupiter In Pisces 2022
It’s a new year and I feel the need to exhale and wipe the sweat off my forehead. We all made it through a very intense 2021. I know I’m not the only one to feel the sense of relief.
Astrologically speaking, Saturn square Uranus was no laughing matter in 2021. I personally know many people whose lives were shaken. We’ve all taken a hit from the pandemic, losing loved ones, jobs, and our emotional sense of security (Uranus in Taurus).
And then for a brief time, from May until July, Jupiter, the planet of hope, freedom, and happiness, dipped its big toes into the ocean of Pisces with many public health precautions lifted and optimism returning.
We nervously stepped out, albeit a bit ‘grungy’ looking. Fashion became comfy loungewear, the beards were left bushy, and women owned their greys. But we ventured out of our caves and life began to stir as the sun’s rays nourished our now socially awkward selves.
It was nice while it lasted.
Then Jupiter went back into Aquarius, once again cohabiting with the Scrooge of the planets, Saturn, and we went back into our cocoons, experiencing increasing shell shocks as Saturn and Uranus completed their final square dance right before Christmas. Polarizing politics, flights canceled, families torn asunder.
And many celebrity deaths in the news this past two years, including our beloved Betty White to close out 2021.
But, the first four months of this year we will once again feel the benevolent optimism, miracles and good fortune of Jupiter returning to Pisces shining its light in the world! Jupiter will do the same again at the end of October to finish out the year.
Reclaim Your Energy For Financial Prosperity
You may be surprised to learn that I find doing readings about money and finances to be no different from doing a love or relationship reading. In my experience, how we handle money is usually exactly the same as how we operate in relationships and how we ultimately treat ourselves and others. How we earn and spend money is also how we love ourselves and others. In the end it is all about how we manage our personal energy.
For example, if you constantly find yourself in overwhelming debt, consider how you operate in your relationships. Do you feel as if you give, and give, and give, and rarely get anything back? Do you feel as if you are always pursuing relationships and they are unwilling to commit? Is it typically an ‘on again, off again’ scenario?
Now consider how this also reflects in your money matters and financial management. Do you find that as soon as you have money it is already spent? Is it continuously flowing out? Do you struggle to hold on to, or build any savings? The deeper truth is that this constant ‘scarcity’ or ‘lack’ is the result of a fear of owning our power.
Do a simple exercise by becoming quiet and centered. Calm your mind and body and then call on your angels and guides. Ask them to show you what it would feel like to hold on to just ten percent more of your energy. Increase this every day for ten days and you will now know what it is like to hold on to hundred percent of your energy!
Once you have reclaimed all your energy, ask your spirit helpers to teach you how to carry this newfound sense of personal power into your daily life. If you are like many of my clients, you will soon find that both your financial priorities have shifted. You will be making less impulse purchases and find yourself saving for the things that are more in alignment with your higher self.
Your Eternal Core Of Divine Perfection
As I was coming out of meditation today, I had a message from Spirit. I was shown the beautiful ball of infinite Light that each of us are at the core. We are eternal Love and Light.
No matter what we learn, or how much earthly information we take in, no matter how much experience we accumulate in life on any given topic – at our core, we are already perfect in spirit.
This was an interesting insight for me, as a person who’s spent most of her life chasing after more metaphysical knowledge and deeper spiritual experiences, only to find that none of the constant searching and spiritual work I had accomplished really matters when it comes down to the Light at the core of my being.
Sure, I have experienced a greater sense of expansion and mental understanding, from doing lots of spiritual work on myself, however, the innate perfection of who I am within, remains untouched and already perfect.
Some might disagree with this and say that it’s not true, but this is beyond anything we could think, say, or do, it’s our original State of Being that remains untouched by anything while we are here in human form.
I can say, however, especially as a Gemini, that when I’m called or propelled to do something different, or learn something new, it might take an army of thousands to stop me from doing it! When I feel guided to pursue something, I will move toward that and put a lot of my time and energy into it.
What is however interesting, is that the divine, eternal part of us, the higher self, the ball of Light so to speak, is totally fine whether we pursue these things or not, because who we are with or without this knowledge or accomplishment, is already whole and complete.
If so, then why bother doing anything at all in this life, if it doesn’t really matter and if we are already whole? My understanding is that we we can only follow the curiosity of the great mystery, as we make our way along our life journey.
