parents
Coping With The Loss Of A Loved One
Many people I know, including myself and several of my clients, have experienced the loss of a child or grandchild.
Losing a grandparent or parent is heartbreaking, but losing a child is absolutely devastating! It is difficult to understand why someone so young is taken before they had a chance to live a full life.
A few years ago, I found some solace for my continuing grief from a very unexpected source.
I am an avid Nascar fan. If you don’t know what Nascar is, it is the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing. Stock car racing is one of the largest spectator sports in America.
A few years ago I watched an interview with one of the masters of this sport, Richard Petty, also known as “The King.” His words struck a deep chord with me.
Richard Petty’s grandson, Adam Petty, was also a racer like his grandfather. He was only 19 when he died in an accident on May 12, 2000 while practicing the sport he loved so much. His car hit the outside wall of the track, killing him instantly.
In the interview I watched, his grandfather spoke of his depression, guilt, grief, and not wanting to get out of bed because he felt he was somehow to blame for encouraging his grandson to pursue this sport that cost him his young life.
Let Us Celebrate The Season With Charity And Kindness
The holidays are a bittersweet time of year for me. While I am blessed to be surrounded by my loved ones during these days, I am also reminded of all the loneliness and suffering that many people around the world experience.
The holidays should be more than just a time of joy and celebration. It should also be a time to examine our privilege and count our blessings.
I came to this realization many years ago as a young woman living in the city of Boston, Massachusetts. Coming from a loving, sheltered family, I made the shocking discovery that the holidays were not joyous for everyone.
It happened while I was walking through the Boston Common one evening with a friend. The Common in downtown Boston is the oldest urban park in the United States. It is traditionally always beautifully decorated for the holidays and there is a long-standing tradition of an annual Christmas lighting ceremony that dates back to 1917.
It all began on December 6, 1917, when the Halifax Explosion, the largest non-nuclear explosion in history, destroyed much of the city. Boston officials learned of the disaster by telegraph and quickly organized and dispatched a relief train to help the survivors.
The True Meaning Of Holiday Gifts
While wrapping Christmas gifts for family and friends today, I thought about whether it is better to be on the giving or receiving end of presents during the holiday season?
In my childhood, receiving presents was undoubtedly the best! But my parents also taught me the importance of giving. They gave my sister and me a small allowance during the holidays to buy gifts for others. It was fun to shop for small items to give to our loved ones. With much anticipation, wetried to pick things that people would actually like and appreciate.
I therefore learned early on that while receiving gifts can be exciting and fun, giving them can be even more rewarding.
My parents were certainly on to something, because the value of giving has been scientifically proven to be more than just a sweet sentiment. For example, according to a study by the American Psychological Association, giving to others increases life expectancy by at least five years! Another study found that people who give to others experience lower blood pressure, less depression, and lower stress levels. In addition, giving to others can increase happiness and well-being. A Harvard Business School study found that giving money to someone else increased participants’ happiness more than spending it on themselves.
Work-Life Balance For The Single Parent
Single parents face many daily challenges and can easily feel overwhelmed. This is especially difficult when juggling childcare, household responsibilities, and your career or business.
It is undoubtedly important to maintain a healthy work-life balance in your life, but it is easier said than done. How does one balance work, family, life, and love as a single parent in the busy world we live in?
Here are some simple strategies for single parents to achieve a better work-life balance.
Work-Life Boundaries. The first important step is to set boundaries between your work and home life. I find that this is often a key element that is missing in the lives of many of my clients.Without clear boundaries between work and home, it is very difficult to be fully present and focused on one or the other at any given time. Without defined boundaries, the single parent is constantly straddling two worlds.
Creating work-life boundaries simply means not mixing business with pleasure. You designate specific times and activities for work and specific times and activities for spending time with your children. This means no thinking about work, no work-related texting, no checking email, and no taking phone calls outside of your designated work time.
The Golden Power Of Silence
I took my early morning walk today along a path surrounded by an olive grove on one side and almond trees on the other. In the background the beautiful hills seemed mystical in the early morning mist.
The only sounds that broke the silence at this early hour were the chirping of birds and the bleating of baby goats playing on the small farm opposite my house. Occasionally they were interrupted by their father, who seemed to keep them safe by nudging them into a particular corner of the property.
In these moments of peaceful silence I like to have a dialogue with spirit to receive some guidance or direction for the day, as well as answers to questions I may have about my life and work. But today I felt guided to simply contemplate the meaning of silence.
There are many forms of silence, some less peaceful than others. For example, there are the ‘elephant in the room’ or ‘cold shoulder’ moments of silence when there is awkwardness between people. There is also the ‘poker face’ silence, when someone pretends to listen, but in reality has mentally withdrawn from the conversation. We also fall silent when we are perplexed or confused. Sometimes we keep silent to avoid possible misunderstandings.
A very powerful form of silence occurs when we are deeply engaged in an activity, alone or with others. Everything else seems to fade away as we concentrate on the task at hand.
And of course the best kind of silence is when we are in communion with spirit and the cosmos. In these moments we feel completely at peace and connected to others and the universe. This silence nourishes the soul and gives rise to divine inspiration and spiritual insight.
The Miraculous Roll Of Film
I have experienced many miracles and magical events in my life. As you read the following incredible story, you will see why I have chosen this particular one to best illustrate my experiences.
When I was 18 years old, I was working at a pre-school in my home town. One of the pupils was a three-year-old girl with whom I felt a real connection. She was an old soul; a bright and talented young artist.
But she usually came to school with unwashed, unbrushed hair and dirty clothes. She would never bring a packed lunch. When her parents came to collect her from school, they were often late and, unlike the other children, she did not run into their arms. There was clearly a disconnect between parent and child.
Eventually I moved several hours away and stopped working at the school. But I still thought of her often and prayed that she was well. A few years after I left, I made some enquiries, but no one knew what had happened to her. I hope she survived her difficult childhood and continued to create art, which I believed may have been her saving grace.
Two decades later, I was visiting the area around my hometown to go hiking with friends in a nearby national park. One day, one of my friends climbed a big rock and I followed him. Then he jumped down and I noticed what looked like something he had accidentally left behind.
“Hey, you dropped your roll of film up here,” I shouted, holding up the roll I’d found on the rock. But it turned out not to be his film and that someone else must have left it there. Maybe that person had the same idea of climbing the rock to take some pictures of the magnificent view.