siblings
Surround Yourself With Divine Love
Love is a concept I encounter every day in my work, and it is indeed a multifaceted thing. In its purest form, it manifests itself as a mother’s love for her child, a partner’s love for his spouse, or a sibling’s love for a brother or sister.
But love also takes more subtle forms. It can be reflected in a teacher’s love for expanding young minds, a researcher’s desire to advance humanity, or an engineer’s fine attention to detail.
There are also negative, toxic forms of ‘love.’ Too much love, though usually well-intentioned, can be harmful. The hovering parent, the controlling spouse, the overprotective friend can stifle true growth, trust, and creativity.
Sometimes conditional love is traded like a commodity or used as a weapon. It can be withheld when behavior is perceived as lacking or used as a reward for conforming to the status quo.
Fake love is also used as a facade or camouflage. The world is full of negative energy and hidden agendas disguised as projects of love that are supposed to be “for the greater good.”
Sometimes love turns into distractions, such as self-centered schemes that are really based on greed. Some people who profess love in truth worship false praise, accolades, and self-enrichment.
Spirit invites us to abandon the charade of false love. Instead, we should strive to be kind, compassionate, and generous without expecting anything in return. We must give others the benefit of the doubt without judging their worth or intent. Each day we should step forward and ask, “How can I help?” instead of making negative assumptions. Spiritual people lead by example. We must show the world the divine beings we are inside.
Betrayal Blindness And The Family Scapegoat
I have a good friend who was raised by a mother who constantly belittled and talked down to her. She never defended herself, because she grew up believing that she deserved her mother’s abuse, because something was wrong with her causing her to always say and do the wrong things.
Once she graduated high school, she moved out of her mom’s house. Her life became much more peaceful for several years, until she started noticing that her brother was following in their mother’s footsteps by adopting the same kind of toxic, abusive language towards her.
It oddly became evident to her one year at Christmas time, when she gifted him a beautiful, crocheted blanket that she had been working on for many months and he rolled his eyes and made some disparaging remark about it. She then started noticing how pompous, ungrateful, and narcissistic he truly was. Growing up with him, she always assumed he just had bit of an ego or a macho attitude, but now that she had gained life experience and wisdom, she realized he was simply an abusive jerk.
Still, she chose not to criticize or judge him. In fact, she did the opposite, she encouraged his long-suffering partner to stay by his side and continue to support and love him, because she understood that he was also just a product of his upbringing, like herself. Meanwhile, he faithfully continued judging and belittling her. Because that is what he had seen their mother do all his life.
But one day, something inside her finally shifted. She had reached a point of no return and decided to start standing up for herself! Enough already.
Dealing With Ancestral Karmic Debt
When a loved one crosses over, they transcend this dimension to enter the next. In the spirit dimension we revert from human ego consciousness back to universal consciousness, and our awareness is no longer limited by time and space.
I like to think of our constantly evolving soul or spirit as ‘cookie dough.’ When we cross over and revert to the broader perspective of universal consciousness, our soul energy is like a ball of dough that has been proofing for a lifetime.
As the Universe, or the Divine Cookie-Maker, rolls out the dough of our returning soul, there will be some karmic ‘lumps.’ These lumps are the unwise choices, mistakes, transgressions, missed opportunities, failures, crimes, and sins for which we didn’t make amends during this lifetime. It then becomes our karmic debt.
Some of these karmic debts go back many generations and have become part of the ancestral legacy of our soul family. It has sometimes dire consequences for everyone we are spiritually connected to in this life and the next. It becomes a shared responsibility for the entire soul family, for which someone needs to step up at some point to break the cycle.
Making amends and striving towards karmic healing is therefore not just something we do for our own sake, but also for those that came before us, and especially for those who will come after us.
Our ancestors on the Other Side are also continually striving to resolve their karmic debts, and for this they may need our help and support. If we hold them, or ourselves, in a state of unforgiveness, they cannot move forward with their karmic healing, or the next stages of their soul journey.
Left Holding The Bag
One of my clients recently said, “I’m the one left holding the bag.” Have you ever been ‘left holding the bag?’ This is when you are put in a situation where you are unfairly held responsible, because other people fail or refuse to take responsibility.
The expression “left holding the bag” originated in 18th-century Britain, but at the time it referred to a person being caught with stolen goods, while the rest of their criminal gang escape responsibility.
Many of us are left holding the bag at some point in our life. This is especially true for empaths, healers and highly sensitive people. They are often the scapegoat in their family, or the friend who is taken advantage of, or the coworker who has to pick up the pieces when others neglect their duties.
The solution for this is often found in spiritual self-empowerment, inner child healing, energy shielding, or simply the setting of boundaries. These are challenges I often assist clients with.
A client was about to purchase a bed and breakfast establishment with the support of an investor. When the day came to sign the papers, the investor decided it was just too much to deal with at the time. This left my client ‘holding the bag,’ having to find a new investor.
Another client was abandoned by her siblings when their mother’s mental and physical health suddenly began to deteriorate, and she was left to her own devices having to care for her mom with no assstance or support from the rest of the family.