News and Views From The Psychic Access Community

childhood

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Keeping Score In A Relationship

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comI believe the habit of keeping a ‘score card’ might start in someone’s childhood. It is based on developing a certain sense of duty and responsibility early on. For example, as kids I remember my sister and I had to take turns doing the dishes. My sister would always keep tabs on that chore. She always knew whose turn it was next. My sister is four years older than me, and to this day she still keeps score on almost everything in her life.

This also set the precedent for me with friends and other family members. Others keeping score just seems natural to me, so I never feel the need to do so myself.

This did not server me well in all aspects of my young adult life. For example, in relationships it always felt like I was the one trying to make things work. It did not make any difference to me who called who last. Therefore, I ended up doing most of the calling. But does it truly matter that much?

What has the other person done for me?  After all I have done and given so much! What do I get out of this relationship? These are the questions score keepers are always asking themselves.

But in my view, a relationship is never 50/50, even if both people are truly happy and fulfilled. One will always be doing less or more. But it does not matter, as true love is supposed to be unconditional.

So, if you are keeping a score card things will never balance and the emotion that will come up is anger, rebellion, defensiveness, or a complete shut-down. That does not serve any relationship in the long run.

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Empowering Life Lessons From My Abusive Father

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comMy father Jim had to grow up quickly in the tough pre-war years. He was the eldest of six children and he did not have an easy childhood, nor tolerant parents.

But life became even more challenging for Jim as he reached adulthood. My parents were married at the age of 21 and had three kids by 23, and another baby at 34.

Jim faced many challenges. As a result, to vent his frustration and process all the stress, he often took it out on those closest to him, namely his wife and children.

Let’s just say my father was not always the ideal husband and parent. It became so bad by the time I was an adult that he would do whatever he could to disrupt my life and my family in any way that you might imagine. The sad part was that he actually wanted to hurt us, as doing so gave him a bizarre sense of satisfaction and control over those closest to him.

I first became fully aware of my father’s desire to disempower his kids when I was about 22 years old. The year was 1982, and jobs were very hard to come by in the United Kingdom in those days. I had an office job but wanted something better. So, I decided to attend school for a year to learn shorthand and typing at the local technical college.

One day, I asked my dad if I could get a ride with him to college, because I had to sit an important exam at 2pm that day. He said I need not worry, as he would drop me off in plenty of time. But then he proceeded to make every excuse not to leave the house!

By quarter to two, I started to panic, as I could not possibly walk or catch a bus from my house to the college with so little time. At ten minutes to two, he finally agreed to take me to sit the exam, but then when we got in the car, he said he needed to go to the garage for gas. I looked at the fuel gauge and saw the car’s tank was full.

I suddenly realized he did not want me to sit the exam, as he did not want me to pass it and better myself and become more independent. Thankfully, his sabotage attempt failed, as I did pass the exam and went on to get a higher paying job.

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Discovering My Supernatural Heritage At Grandma’s

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comSometime around the year 1967 my parents told me one day that I was going over to grandmother’s house so that she could watch me while they were going somewhere for the day. I begged them not to take me there, because the place was haunted. I felt like something was always watching me at that house… and it was not my grandmother! But my parents told me my cousin Alan was going to be there too, and I would have someone to play with. So I reluctantly agreed.

When we pulled up my aunt and uncle were just driving off, so at least I knew my cousin was there and we could play with our trucks. When I walked in there was a little girl beside my cousin. My grandmother introduced her as Sally. She also watched Sally while her mom and dad went to work.

While my cousin and I where playing, Sally was happily playing all by herself. She was talking to an imaginary friend and they were playing with her dolls. At lunchtime I remember feeling like someone was tickling me at the table. Sally told me that I was sitting in her friend’s chair and asked me to move.

There was an empty chair across from me and I asked Sally why her friend could not just go and sit over there? Then I felt something pulling on my ear really hard, and I jumped! I quickly moved over to the other chair. I looked at my cousin, but he didn’t say a word. He just looked at me with his eyes really wide open.

When my grandmother returned to the kitchen, I told her that I wanted to go home. I wanted to call my mom and dad to pick me up. But she had just finished talking to my mom, who asked for me to spend the night at my grandmother’s. They would pick me up the next day. I was not impressed.

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Keeping The Family Out Of Your Love Life

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comFamily and our relatives have a huge impact on our romantic lives, whether we realize it or not. We bring so much from the way we were raised into our love relationships and marriages.

But having had a difficult childhood does not necessarily set us up for challenges and failure in our relationships. In fact, for those who are self-aware it can be an advantage of choosing not to bring the toxic drama of your childhood home into a current relationship.

For example, if you saw your father treat your mother without respect, you might set your mind to never allowing that happen in your own relationship. This kind of courage and personal responsibility can break the cycle.

We all have things that happen in childhood things that happen that are out of our control, it is all in how you deal with them that forms us as adults. We have a choice always.

The other aspect is culture and the values and customs with which we were raised. Depending on the circumstances it can have a significant impact on our relationships.  Once again it is a choice how we want to handle it. Do we follow the family traditions, or not?

It takes courage and an open mind to march to your own drum. Standing up for what you believe can also go a long way. Sometimes this is vital to ensure a healthy, happy relationship that will last.

Of course, the biggest challenge for most couples is having the family up in your relationship business. Do your relatives influence your decisions and interfere in your relationship? Navigating a relationship or marriage successfully in this day and age is challenging enough.

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Successful Relationships Begin With Self-Love

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comHow do you ensure your relationship will work long-term? Many callers ask me this question almost every day. In my experience, there needs to be a balance of love, caring, respect and truth for any relationship to last. If you do not have these components in a relationship, more than likely it will not work out.  If a relationship is out of balance, then it usually is too one-sided and not serving your highest good.

The key first step is to love and respect yourself, because when you love and respect yourself, you will also receive more love and respect from others. There is not much of a future for any relationship that is based on the self-sacrifice of one party. It never lasts and typically does not end well. Balance is required in matters of the heart.

Along with the respect you deserve in the way you are treated. it is loving, caring, and respectful? This is applicable to everyone in your life, including romantic partners, friends, co-workers, family, and relatives.

Respect is not only something we must demand, but we must also set boundaries for it in our daily life. When a boundary is repeatedly disregarded or violated by someone in your life, then something needs to change. This is when you have to say, enough.

Sometimes the hard decisions need to be made. If someone is not respecting you in your relationship, treating you poorly, and not meeting your most essential wants and needs, then it is time to make a change. Respect yourself enough to end it.

Too many people do not believe they deserve love and respect, for various reasons. The problem often begins in childhood. It is important to realize you do and to start loving yourself a little more – not in an egotistical way, but in a way that you love and respect yourself enough to want only the best for you and to no longer settle for anything less.

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Our Deepest Wound Can Become Our Greatest Power

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comMercury retrograde thankfully ends today! Astrologers predicted this retrograde would allow us the freedom to purify our lives by releasing people, circumstances, and behaviors that are holding us back or no longer serve us. It certainly kicked up a lot of old wounds and baggage for many of my clients, and also for myself.

This was probably due to a number of reasons, including Uranus and Venus both being retrograde at the same time, and the combination of Mercury retrograde occurring along with a Full Moon in Cancer on January 17th.  Many people I did readings for during this astrological period were all dealing with painful memories, unhealed traumas, and intense emotions.

At one point I decided to take a break myself, to create some space and allow my own unresolved emotion to surface. Every time I found becoming unnecessarily defensive, or attempting to place blame on others, I immediately pivoted my attention back to myself and ventured within – to where the origination of this pain truly stemmed from.

I especially found my thoughts were constantly going to my parents and particularly to my mother.  My maternal grandmother passed away when my mom was only 13 years old. This has been a recurring theme throughout my life, with me wondering if this had anything to do with my mom always being so hard on me? I, fact, it became the official ‘excuse’ for our difficult relationship.

My recent retrograde self-exploration made me realize that no matter how hard my brain might try to rationalize this old pain, my body still would not accept it. For the first time in all these years, I finally allowed myself to go inside this wound, to examine my inner truth.  I had a conversation with this old wound and allowed it to speak to me directly.

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When You Wish Upon A Star

Click Here NOW for a FREE psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comMy dad always said one should make a wish on the very first star that you see every night. Anything your heart desires will come true. When you see, or hear the word star…what emotions arise in you?

Think of how many up-lifting songs have been written about the stars. The first song many people learn on an instrument is often Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. It reminds me of the theme song for the Walt Disney classic, Pinocchio. It is such a ‘feel-good’ song. When you wish upon a star it makes no difference who you are.

For some of us a star was the very first symbol that made us feel good about ourselves as children. In kindergarten getting a star for a job well done was a big deal! It always had such a sense of pride to show my parents at the end of a week how many gold star papers I had acquired.

A great pastime for children, especially at summer camp here in Maine, is laying on the ground looking up at the stars and hoping to see a shooting star.

Night people often say they get their batteries recharged by looking at the moon and stars. It brings them a sense of peace and hope for the future. One thing we can always count on is the sun, moon and stars will shine again.

Looking at the heavens for answers, ancient mariners used the stars to navigate where they were on the ocean. Sailors learned how to navigate by watching the movement of the stars.

According to natural navigating coach, Tristan Gooley, the North Star, known as Polaris is directly above the North Pole. “This means that whenever we point towards the spot on the horizon directly below the North Star, we must be pointing north,” he writes.

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