betrayal
When Walking Away Is A Sacred Act of Love
One of the most life-changing truths we come to face on the spiritual path is this: not everyone is meant to walk with us all the way.
As we awaken and align more closely with our authentic self, some relationships begin to fall away. While it’s natural to resist this because endings hurt and change can feel like loss, there is a quiet, sacred truth beneath it all: Letting go is often an act of love.
As your soul expands, you begin to see your relationships differently. They are no longer just emotional bonds or physical connections; they reveal themselves as soul contracts—agreements made on a spiritual level before you ever met people in the physical realm.
Some people come into your life to uplift you, to love you, and to walk beside you for the long haul. Others arrive to teach you about boundaries, self-worth, and discernment. Once their role is complete, the relationship may start to feel heavy, strained, or even harmful. This isn’t failure; it’s a sign that the contract has been fulfilled.
Yet, this part of the journey is rarely discussed. In spiritual circles, we often hear messages about unconditional love, compassion, forgiveness, and acceptance. These are indeed sacred spiritual principles. But we rarely hear the equally sacred teaching that sometimes the most loving thing you can do is walk away!
Letting go of a toxic or misaligned relationship is not abandonment or selfishness. It’s not also not a sign of weakness, cowardice, or a lack of spiritual depth. In fact, it often requires more courage and clarity than staying.
They Can’t Gaslight You If You Trust Your Gut!
Gaslighting can be a very destructive aspect of a toxic relationship. It basically refers to any form of “reality twisting” or “crazy-making” that is designed to confuse or manipulate the victim.
Gaslighting is used to gain power and control in the relationship by making the victim question their reality. The phenomenon is typically found in romantic relationships, but it can occur in all kinds of social relationships, including friendships, at work, and with neighbors.
Sometimes it’s done in an obvious way, right under the victim’s nose, but more often it’s done under the radar, and you don’t always know who’s gaslighting you, or even that you’re being gaslighted.
“Gaslighting” is a psychological term derived from the 1938 stage play Gas Light and its 1940 and 1944 film adaptations. The movie is about a husband’s attempts to systematically drive his wife crazy by repeatedly dimming the gas lights in their home, only to deny that it ever happened when the wife asks him if he also noticed it. Over time, he manipulates his wife to the point where she believes she is imagining things and loses her mind.
Gaslighting is a common manipulation technique used by dictators, con artists, abusers, sociopaths, narcissists, and cult leaders. It’s done in such a way that the victim rarely realizes how much they’ve actually been brainwashed.
At first, the victim may have the idea that they’re not imagining things, but that someone else is doing this to them. They may even have an intuition about who that person is. However, the goal of gaslighting is to get victims to doubt these rational thoughts and replace them completely with the belief that there is something wrong with them, either mentally, spiritually, emotionally, or physically. The worst part, in my opinion, is that it makes you doubt your own intuition.
When Communication Breaks Down In A Relationship
So often callers ask me why they have trouble communicating with their partner or spouse. There’s often some kind of miscommunication going on in many people’s relationships these days.
And these misunderstandings quickly snowball into something bigger if they’re not addressed early on.
When someone contacts me for a reading with this kind of question, I go in and do the work to get to the root of the problem. Superficial answers are never good enough when it comes to the people we love and care about.
Because let’s face it, love and relationships are vital to our happiness and sense of belonging, but they are rarely easy and straightforward. They are worth the effort when the connection is real.
The first thing I always check with this kind of reading is if there’s any infidelity or dishonesty. It’s uncomfortable and dangerous territory, but we always have to rule it out because it’s so common these days.
If one person isn’t being honest or cheating, it throws everything else off balance. There’s no point in doing deep relationship recovery and healing work if the foundation of trust and integrity is crumbling.
Once that’s clear, I tune in to see if there is what I call a “love cord” connection between the couple. This is my way of checking to see if their souls are karmically connected.
Cutting The Toxic Cords That Bind Us
In every relationship – romantic, platonic, professional – there is a metaphysical cord of attachment that exhanges energy from one person to the other.
These energy cords can be thought of as WiFi signals, electrical circuits, or even surgical tubes that transfer mental, emotional, and spiritual energies between individuals. They are the invisible ties of love that keep us connected to our loved ones.
I remember reading an article years ago about the intense grief of famous American singer Dean Martin after the tragic death of his eldest son. His boy was a fighter pilot in the California Air National Guard and lost his life in a plane crash during a training flight in 1987.
Martin described the loss as feeling as if his “heart had been ripped out.” This vivid description is a testament to the reality of these ties that bind us. The intense pain the singer felt was essentially his heart chakra feeling ‘broken.’ The loss had a profound impact on the remainder of his life and career.
The concept of these cords may seem abstract, but their effects are very tangible. They are not just symbolic; they are very real and have a profound effect on our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being on a daily basis.
When we engage in any kind of relationship with someone, these energetic cords extend from our chakras, or energy centers, to those of the other person. While these soul-to-soul cords feed us with all the good energies that come from being connected to others, such as love, nurturing, and belonging, they can also have the opposite effect.
Find Your Peace In The Present Moment
A theme that comes up frequently in psychic readings is how people inadvertently choose to live in the past, finding comfort in nostalgia or reliving painful memories that keep them tied to an earlier time. The past is often romanticized — a seemingly simpler, happier place, free from the burdens of the present.
For those who had a happy and idyllic childhood, the past may seem like a golden era. They fondly recall carefree days filled with laughter, unconditional love, and the security of knowing that someone else was responsible for making the big decisions.
These people long for the innocence of childhood, the guidance of loving parents, the support of trusted mentors, and simpler times. It can be a source of comfort, but it can also prevent them from fully embracing the possibilities of the present.
For others, the past is a dark and painful landscape filled with trauma, regret, or missed opportunities.
Some people carry deep emotional wounds from their past. Perhaps they grew up in an environment of neglect, conflict, or abuse. Instead of a safe and nurturing childhood, they experienced hardship, pain, or betrayal.
Bad memories, deeply etched in the soul, can feel like an unshakable burden. Those who have suffered often relive their trauma, carrying resentment and anger toward those who wronged them. For these people, the past is not a place of comfort, but a source of suffering that continues to affect their daily lives. Continue reading
Never Confide In The ‘Empathy Impaired’
I recently did a reading for a client who asked me a question that I had never been asked before. Even though it was my first time working with her, her question made me ask myself the same question about my own life.
Her question was simple: Who can I confide in? Who can I trust? We then worked through her short list of significant people in her life and I shared what I felt about each of them with the guidance of spirit.
I immediately felt that two particular people were not the kind of people you would want to trust completely, much less confide in.
The first clear indicator was inconsistency in their words and actions. If someone frequently says one thing and does another, it suggests a lack of reliability and sincerity.
Another red flag that immediately came up was gossiping or speaking negatively about others behind their backs, as this behavior demonstrates a lack of confidentiality and respect.
But I always want to make sure that what I am psychically sensing is accurate before I reveal this kind of information. So, I asked her for her date of birth, along with the first names and dates of some of the people she wasn’t so sure about. Sure enough, she confirmed what I had initially seen.
Psychics and mediums often use “soul identity details” such as birth dates, photos, names, or even personal items like clothing or jewelry to enhance the connection with a particular person’s energy or spirit. I think of it as looking into someone’s “soul footprints.” This enhances the psychic connection process in several ways:
Embrace Your Personal Power In Relationships
Our relationships have great power and influence in our lives. In particular, many of us spend countless hours pursuing love and romance. Then, once we are in a relationship, we spend even more time and energy thinking about it, confiding in friends about it…often trying to make the relationship different or better.
I deal with this almost daily as I have counseled hundreds of lovesick, frustrated, and heartbroken clients over the years.
“If only he would do what I want, things would be different,” some of my clients might say. “If only he would be more open and honest, maybe I could trust him more.” Truth be told, I have heard similar words come out of my own mouth about my own relationships more times than I care to admit!
Unfortunately, instead of successfully influencing our partner’s words or behavior, we are often left feeling disappointed, betrayed, frustrated, powerless, or out of control. It is draining, pointless, and definitely not the best use of one’s time and energy.
So how do we change it? How do we take emotional control of our life and our relationships? The answer is shockingly simple.
It is all about taking a different, broader perspective on relationships and what they are here to teach us. A quote from Unity Church’s Daily Word magazine perfectly captures this shift in perspective: “Through our relationships with one another, we express the power, presence and love of God.”