higher self
The Constant Battle Of Head Versus Heart
Have you ever second-guessed yourself, done or said something that went against your gut, only to realize in retrospect that your initial feeling or hunch was right? Had you acted differently, it could have saved you a lot of heartache and loss, emotionally, physically or financially?
If you have ever been in this position, know that you are not alone. The “head versus heart” dilemma can be very confusing and frustrating. Many of my clients struggle with it and some experience a great deal of confusion, stress and emotional discomfort as a result.
When faced with difficult decisions or challenging situations, we usually have a good sense of what the best course of action might be. But then we tend to look for concrete evidence to support our feelings and intuitive hunches, and when we cannot find any, which is often the case, our heads take precedence over our hearts. So we end up discounting our feelings and intuitions, usually to our own detriment.
The struggle between head and heart is a common theme in philosophy, literature, art, and popular culture, as we all regularly experience inner conflicts between reason and emotion, logic and intuition, responsibility and passion.
Comparison Poisons The Heart, Mind And Soul
When we are going through difficult times, we tend to compare our struggles and suffering to the lives of others and measure ourselves by their perceived happiness, joy and success.
We often do this these days by comparing our own lives to what others post on social media. Then we judge and mentally torture ourselves for not living up to other people’s highlight reels of happiness and good fortune.
Sure, it is sometimes beneficial to self-reflect and strive for more based on the examples of others who serve as our role models. However, when we indiscriminately compare our own life journey to everyone else’s, we end up diminishing our own uniqueness and value.
While social comparison can motivate us to improve and grow, it can also lead to toxic self-judgment, envy, resentment, and extreme unhappiness. Constantly focusing on the highlights of other people’s lives quickly becomes toxic and self-destructive.
However, this tendency is not a character flaw in some of us. In fact, it is a natural evolutionary instinct that we all have. Our ancestors survived by living in social groups. Our tendency to compare ourselves to others is therefore a very common human trait, rooted in our evolution as a species.
Learning To Honor My Higher Self
Have you ever had a conversation with someone that made you feel very uncomfortable, upset, even angry, to the point where you could feel their negative, toxic energy attaching to you? I certainly have, more times than I care to remember.
This feeling of extreme discomfort is usually a clear sign that the interaction you are having with this person is going against your higher self. Yet, even though we are aware of this on some level, we often fail to do what is right for our highest good and instead continue to interact with the energy thief in question to our own detriment.
Truth be told, I have been guilty of this myself many times. Only to face the aftermath of unhappiness and disappointment for not honoring my higher self.
I have recently become increasingly aware of this personal failing and have been actively working to identify my motives for putting and keeping myself in these situations.
I have come so far in my quest for increased self-awareness and spiritual growth that I am willing to explore and deal with the deepest corners of my soul-self. True enlightenment is not only about our brightest achievements, but also about our darkest inner shadows.
Surround Yourself With Divine Love
Love is a concept I encounter every day in my work, and it is indeed a multifaceted thing. In its purest form, it manifests itself as a mother’s love for her child, a partner’s love for his spouse, or a sibling’s love for a brother or sister.
But love also takes more subtle forms. It can be reflected in a teacher’s love for expanding young minds, a researcher’s desire to advance humanity, or an engineer’s fine attention to detail.
There are also negative, toxic forms of ‘love.’ Too much love, though usually well-intentioned, can be harmful. The hovering parent, the controlling spouse, the overprotective friend can stifle true growth, trust, and creativity.
Sometimes conditional love is traded like a commodity or used as a weapon. It can be withheld when behavior is perceived as lacking or used as a reward for conforming to the status quo.
Fake love is also used as a facade or camouflage. The world is full of negative energy and hidden agendas disguised as projects of love that are supposed to be “for the greater good.”
Sometimes love turns into distractions, such as self-centered schemes that are really based on greed. Some people who profess love in truth worship false praise, accolades, and self-enrichment.
Spirit invites us to abandon the charade of false love. Instead, we should strive to be kind, compassionate, and generous without expecting anything in return. We must give others the benefit of the doubt without judging their worth or intent. Each day we should step forward and ask, “How can I help?” instead of making negative assumptions. Spiritual people lead by example. We must show the world the divine beings we are inside.
Staying Connected To Spirit
If you are like me, I sometimes find it a struggle to disconnect from the ego in order to commune with spirit, Being spiritually aware and connected is a state of higher consciousness I prefer to spend as much time in as humanly possible.
Wouldn’t it be absolutely wonderful if we were always fully connected to spirit? Life is so much better and easier when my heart and mind are in the wonderful world of spirit.
Of course, it is not entirely practical or wise to always be in a higher state of consciousness, but one can certainly strive to spend more time living spiritually connected.
What I have learned to be extremely important is the practice of gratitude. Every day I try to consciously revel in all that is good and blessed in my life, instead of bringing myself down by focusing on what is wrong or lacking. We always have much more to be thankful for than we care to admit.
Another commitment I have made is to constantly remind myself that I am part of something greater than myself and connected to everyone and everything in the universe. This is not only a privilege, but also a responsibility. Regardless of how I feel on any given day, I am a spiritual being in human form who has the wonderful ability to choose the better side of myself and not let the ego take over.
I also know from experience that in order to stay spiritually connected, it is crucial for me to set aside some time each day for spiritual reflection, even if it is just a few minutes of meditation, to contemplate my purpose in this world, or ways I can be more compassionate, forgiving, or grateful.
Raising An Old Soul
We have more people on the planet now than ever before. That means we have more old souls, and more new ones. Many parents are raising old souls and are struggling with how different it is from the information in all of the parenting books and blogs out there.
If your child is an old soul, which is one who has lived many past lives, they probably were your parent at one time. On some level they know and remember this and may challenge your authority, and change in roles. Thus, the power struggle so many parents go through.
I have been working with children for decades and have had many of them tell me their past life stories. I’ve heard, “I used to be a princess” and “I used to have a sister” or “My mom says we’re not having another baby, but I know I have a little brother coming!”
I’ve also had children tell me how they died in another life or how their mom isn’t their “real” mom. One boy told me he remembered being born. He remembered leaving the light and coming through a tunnel. It was a difficult decision to come back to Earth.
Another gifted child I worked with was able to find lost items, when his parents asked him where something was that had been misplaced. Just the faith that they had in him and the unquestioning belief that he could find these items helped him open up an invaluable gift that will serve him and others in life. Old souls also tend to have unusual or extraordinary gifts, talents and interests which should be nurtured for the greater good.