caring
The Spiritual Practice Of Flower Power
Every now and again, I purchase a bouquet of flowers as a gift to myself. Placing a vase of flowers on your home altar or sacred space adds nature-inspired ambiance, brightness, and sensuality to one’s spiritual self-care.
I also love to diffuse the essential oils of flowers, especially when I meditate, but they don’t have the tangibility and energetic beauty of a stunning array of fresh blooms. Analogous to eating whole food versus taking a supplement, fresh flowers represent the wholeness, divine design, and awe-inspiring beauty of Gaia, Mother Nature, our Earth Mother, the Divine Feminine.
Unadulterated, the ‘flower power’ of a beautiful bouquet commands marvelous healing energies, blesses the giver, and inspires bountiful gratitude in the recipient.
The most powerful spiritual practice involving flowers is to plant your own flower garden with perennial varieties, such as tulips, black-eyed susans, and chrysanthemums. With careful planning around the seasonal calendar one can also have different species in bloom at different times throughout the entire year.
Cultivating a thriving garden of flowers is a magnificent form of energy work. It attracts and manifests emotional healing, abundance, and the fulfillment of wishes, especially in aspects of romance, marriage, fertility, and parenthood. By lovingly nurturing and caring for the delicate beauty of living flowers, we invite much love, beauty and abundance into our lives.
When Others Let Us Down
Many years ago, a skilled numerologist told me that her analysis showed that I am the kind of person who always does what she says she will do. “When you commit to getting something done, one can be very sure it will get done,” she said. Therefore, it always baffles me when people make plans with you, or promise to do something, and then they do not follow through. I tend to take it personally.
My late husband often spoke nostalgically of how, back in the day when he first went into business, a man’s handshake on an agreement or promise still meant something. Perhaps times have changed?
Clients often consult with me on similar disappointments in their lives. When they are let down by others, they contact me to seek answers as to why a someone in their life could have been so dismissive of them.
I have personally learned that some people are indeed sincere in the moment they make such promises or commitments, but then they become distracted or forget to follow through. This doesn’t worry them, as they do not have what I call the ‘hyperactive sense of responsibility’ that some of us do!
In a recent holding space healing session, I was surprised to discover that two incidents that occurred very long ago had caused an energy blockage for me. These events seem so minor compared to other instances that caused me much greater disappointment in later years. It reminded me that one should never underestimate influences during our formative years.
The first incident was when I was about fifteen years old, and I had made arrangements to meet up with one of my cousins. I took our arrangement very seriously and was gutted when she wasn´t home when I arrived at her house. I was even more devastated when I complained to my mother about it and she simply responded: “Oh well, don’t fuss over it. Maybe she was just busy.”
Blessed Are The Kind And Helpful
September is Virgo season! What better time to consider becoming a better person by being more compassionate and supportive to others in need? Virgos are known for being helpful, kind, sympathetic, and someone others can lean on.
Virgo happens to be my Sun sign, so I have a bias here. But seriously, nothing is more rewarding than to be of service. Nothing blesses us more than helping to make the world a better place.
We owe it to ourselves and others to be of service. Because once we are truly there for others, we soon begin to notice undeserved joys and blessings filling our wellspring of abundance every day.
When we are kind, helpful and of service to others we begin to draw more beneficial energy to us, and lose track of the need to count money at the table as it comes in. Work is simply fun! Others see our joy and inspire towards similar goals in their own lives.
Those who are unkind or disregard the needs of others, even treating others as their emotional punching bags, eventually have a heavy karmic duty to repay. Being selfish, narcissistic, and cruel are the sources of much misery, anxiety and self-destructive, addictive behaviors in many people’s lives. It simply does not pay to be callous and uncharitable.
Of course, we all have our self-absorbed ‘bad days,’ because none of us are perfect. But we do an inventory at the end of the day, reflecting on how our conduct may have made others feel.
Create a sacred space in your home where you may atone for your missteps; peaceful area where you may recite a daily intention for grace. Equip this space with an essential oil diffuser or incense burner, candles, crystals and gemstones, oracle cards or runes, prayer beads, singing bowls, personal mementos, photos of loved ones, artwork, and other symbolic items.
True Healing Begins With Holding Space
A work associate and friend recently offered me a free healing session, which he describes as ‘holding space.’ It involves the healer simply ‘being present’ and mindful in the moment with the client during a video call.
He explained the process beforehand and informed me that was going to simply talk and express myself, with no prompting from him. I gratefully accepted his kind offer.
I was not sure what to expect, but having studied various healing modalities myself over the years and being naturally curious about all aspects of spirituality and holistic health, I was open to the experience.
To begin he invited me to just relax and focus on my breathing. Once he senses that I was ready to proceed, he encouraged me to simply begin talking about whatever came to mind.
“Oh no,” I secretly thought, “what on earth will I talk about?”
Well, I soon discovered that it wasn’t difficult at all! I spontaneously began talking, and soon it was pretty much non-stop! I kicked off talking about my concerns for my aging pets, and then went on to other everyday worries and domestic matters. Eventually, I switched to my family history – specifically focusing on all the times I had felt invisible or let down by relatives.
About halfway through, I briefly hesitated and asked my friend if he was not maybe getting bored? But he assured me that he was perfectly fine, adding that this kind of work was very much a calling for him. He later explained that he has overcome several life challenges and tragedies himself over the years, and subsequent soul-searching, as well as further training in various holistic practices, ultimately led him to begin holding space for others.
Don’t Walk On Eggshells Anymore!
Do you often find yourself around people that make you feel like you have to monitor every single thing you say, for fear you may be hurting their feelings? Do you constantly have to be cautious and guarded around certain people in your life, because they internalize everything you say? It really is like walking on eggshells!
I used to have a friend like that. At first I complied, but then one day I decided to start talking like I would normally talk to my other friends. I wanted to see what effect it would have on this person. Well, it actually helped in the end, as it soon made her see how silly she was being. In fact, she even confessed to how she felt bad for reacting as if the entire world revolved around her and her feelings. It turned out to be a meaningful opportunity for her personal growth.
Also, have you ever known anyone whom you shared some inner most concern or anxiety with, and they act like you are making a mountain out of a molehill? You trusted them by sharing your inner most fear or heartache, and they react like it is nothing or you are just being silly. They may even turn around and act as if what you are saying is just plain wrong, or irrelevant! As a highly sensitive person I have experienced this many times in my life and it’s no fun, trust me. And if you’re like me, you just stop talking to this person all together about anything that may deeply matter to you.
These interpersonal experiences can be frustrating and hurtful, but also very valuable to learn from. As soon as this kind of interaction happens with someone, it is useful to reflect on whom you can really trust and have faith in, and who not. If you become more aware of whom you surround yourself with, more people will come into your life that will truly hear you and really have compassion and a deep understanding of what you’re trying to impart. They will also be willing and able to give great advice and be a great sounding board for you, without being egotistical or simply uncaring!
Successful Relationships Begin With Self-Love
How do you ensure your relationship will work long-term? Many callers ask me this question almost every day. In my experience, there needs to be a balance of love, caring, respect and truth for any relationship to last. If you do not have these components in a relationship, more than likely it will not work out. If a relationship is out of balance, then it usually is too one-sided and not serving your highest good.
The key first step is to love and respect yourself, because when you love and respect yourself, you will also receive more love and respect from others. There is not much of a future for any relationship that is based on the self-sacrifice of one party. It never lasts and typically does not end well. Balance is required in matters of the heart.
Along with the respect you deserve in the way you are treated. it is loving, caring, and respectful? This is applicable to everyone in your life, including romantic partners, friends, co-workers, family, and relatives.
Respect is not only something we must demand, but we must also set boundaries for it in our daily life. When a boundary is repeatedly disregarded or violated by someone in your life, then something needs to change. This is when you have to say, enough.
Sometimes the hard decisions need to be made. If someone is not respecting you in your relationship, treating you poorly, and not meeting your most essential wants and needs, then it is time to make a change. Respect yourself enough to end it.
Too many people do not believe they deserve love and respect, for various reasons. The problem often begins in childhood. It is important to realize you do and to start loving yourself a little more – not in an egotistical way, but in a way that you love and respect yourself enough to want only the best for you and to no longer settle for anything less.
Birth Order And The Empath
Most of us are familiar with the notion that the personality traits of the firstborn are typically different from the middle sibling, or the youngest child in the family, and so on. But many empaths do not realize how they may be impacted by their birth order in the family.
In The Birth Order Book, author Kevin Lemar gives a detailed outline of these so-called ‘birth order’ characteristics and qualities.
Firstborns, as well as only children, for example, are often associated with leadership attributes and stronger personalities, along with being more protective, fearless, and reliable than their siblings. However, the firstborn may also exhibit some less desirable traits, such as being controlling, bossy and impatient.
The middle-born tend to be social butterflies and peacekeepers, who are focused on fairness and keeping everyone happy. The youngest-born tend to be fun-loving, outgoing, creative, free spirited and can be adept at manipulating others to do things for them.
Only children tend to be mature for their age, perfectionistic and conscientious, but may feel the burden of high parental expectations.
The Firstborn Empath
My experience with empaths has been that the firstborn and only child empaths are indeed more protective, fearless, independent, reliable, but in the empath these protective instincts are magnified tenfold.
They also tend to feel it is their responsibility to solve every human problem and protect everyone around them, regardless. I often see a very enhanced sense of responsibility.
