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The Constant Battle Of Head Versus Heart
Have you ever second-guessed yourself, done or said something that went against your gut, only to realize in retrospect that your initial feeling or hunch was right? Had you acted differently, it could have saved you a lot of heartache and loss, emotionally, physically or financially?
If you have ever been in this position, know that you are not alone. The “head versus heart” dilemma can be very confusing and frustrating. Many of my clients struggle with it and some experience a great deal of confusion, stress and emotional discomfort as a result.
When faced with difficult decisions or challenging situations, we usually have a good sense of what the best course of action might be. But then we tend to look for concrete evidence to support our feelings and intuitive hunches, and when we cannot find any, which is often the case, our heads take precedence over our hearts. So we end up discounting our feelings and intuitions, usually to our own detriment.
The struggle between head and heart is a common theme in philosophy, literature, art, and popular culture, as we all regularly experience inner conflicts between reason and emotion, logic and intuition, responsibility and passion.
Learning To Trust Your Intuition
How often have you said, “If only I had gone with my gut?” This is a question that many of us have asked ourselves at one time or another about a matter, or even about the sincerity of a person who turned out to be untrustworthy, and we gave them the benefit of the doubt, only to feel heartbroken when they betrayed us.
We don’t have to throw reason out the window when we tune into our inner wisdom called intuition. But while it’s good to have as many facts and information available as possible before making a choice or decision, there are certain times when we don’t have the luxury of first weighing all the pros and cons. Tapping into our intuition is a powerful tool for making difficult decisions and important life choices by spontaneously ‘knowing’ or ‘sensing’ what’s best for us in our work, business, relationship, or lifestyle.
For example, as a manager you may be hiring someone for a job who ticks all the boxes in terms of qualifications and experience, but that little inner voice is screaming, “Don’t hire this person!” If you then do hire them, you may find out later that they have deep-seated issues that will upset the rest of the staff and antagonize your customers.
So many clients have told me over the years that they had an overwhelming feeling that they were making a huge mistake, but they decided to marry someone because they wanted to make everyone else happy, or because so much effort and expense had gone into the wedding arrangements. Just the other day a client told me that he should have listened to his inner guidance, not to mention the guidance he received in a psychic reading that warned him that he would end up separating within a few months of the wedding. If only he had trusted his intuition.
Free Yourself From An Unhealthy Relationship
An intimate relationship or marriage is meant to be a safe space. Your partner or spouse is supposed to be the closest person in your life. They should be the one person you are able to trust unconditionally with the most important aspects of your life.
If you are currently in a challenging relationship, you need to ask yourself if this union has all the key traits for a healthy, happy relationship. Do you feel secure, safe, and supported? More importantly, do you feel loved and valued?
If not, are you hoping it will somehow work eventually, and develop into something that will offer you more of what you need and deserve?
These are vital questions to ask yourself, not only before you commit to someone, but also throughout the relationship. All relationships evolve over time as people change and grow.
Just because everything was great during the initial ‘honeymoon’ phase of a relationship, does not guarantee it will remain that way. A healthy relationship continues to grow and evolve, as both partners grown and evolve.
I have worked with many clients over the years who settled for less, or got caught up in the downward spiral of a dysfunctional, toxic relationship. Saying “I love you” does not mean much if it is not backed up by matching actions and behavior.
Transform Your Life One Step At A Time
Knowing when to make that much needed change in your life can be daunting and very confusing. We often feel this need for change when we already have a lot going on. We tend to also overthink things and then feel overwhelmed, or even paralyzed with anxiety or fear.
Once you get into this kind of ‘stuck’ pattern, nothing seems to get done or resolved. No choices or decisions are made. In turn, this causes even more unhappiness, distress, and turmoil in your life. We all have a tendency to get in our own way.
Over the years of working with many clients in this situation, spirit has always made one thing very clear: it always starts with a firm choice or decision. You don’t have to act on it immediately, but it instantly begins to shift your energy in a new direction, or towards a long-term solution.
Indecision, fear, or lack of commitment to a clear vision for the future is first and foremost what keeps many people stuck indefinitely in the stagnant energy loop of an unhappy, unfulfilled life.
Once you have made up your mind about what you intend to achieve or which direction you wish to go, you gain more clarity and become calmer and more grounded to start taking baby steps forward. Then you can begin to resolve the situation one step at a time with spirit’s support.
To get started consider a simple, step-by-step approach to make break the process down into smaller steps that will be less overwhelming and more attainable.
Waiting On The World To Change
Waiting On The World To Change is not just a great John Mayer song, it is also a devastating pattern in many people’s lives. Too often people are waiting for some outside force to come along and bring them the happiness and fulfillment they want. Living one’s life ‘on hold’ in this way can become a incapacitating habit that will only serve to make us eternally stuck and unhappy.
When we are waiting for a change from someone or something other than ourselves, we are not taking control of our own power. More importantly, we are also not taking personal responsibility for our God-given free will choices, nor are we holding ourselves accountable for our own actions (or inaction).
We all have that friend who is always saying how great her relationship would be ‘if only’ her partner would change a certain habit, or do something differently. Or that colleague who never gets the promotion, while she keeps blaming others as to why she is constantly overlooked. Or the diseased relative who ‘cannot’ improve her health and wellness, because making better lifestyle choices just doesn’t fit into her busy work schedule and social life.
The worst one for me is people waiting for that amazing soulmate relationship to finally materialize, when they are not making even the least bit of effort to put themselves out there and meet new people.
Some people spend a lot of time constantly setting new goals or intentions, making wish lists, creating vision boards, or doing visualizations or rituals, to manifest the changes they want to see in their lives. But what if the thing they need to change is actually themselves?
There Is Nothing To Worry About!
We seem to live in troubled times. In my part of the world, we have recently experienced the passing of our beloved queen, the resignation of two prime ministers, and the continuing effects of a global economic recession. So much to worry about, right?
True, but only from a limited human viewpoint. From the spiritual perspective, we need not worry about what tomorrow may bring, because we can trust in God, Source, Spirit, the Divine to support and guide us, and to positively orchestrate things on our behalf.
As a Christian, I have faith in the Almighty having my back every step of the way. In the New Testament of The Bible, Jesus Christ makes it very clear why we should not worry about what lies ahead. In Matthew 6 he says:
“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin…Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
As a professional psychic, many clients consult me because they are fearful or anxious about what will or will not happen in their future. Worrying about the future is of course understandable, yet there are both spiritual and practical reasons why it is best not to do so:
