self-compassion
Finding The Courage To Heal
All of us will experience some heartache, adversity and grief in our life. It may be a serious health scare, the ending of a relationship or marriage, the tragic loss of a loved one, retrenchment from a ‘secure’ job, sudden bankruptcy, becoming homeless due to a foreclosure, or becoming the victim of abuse and violence.
These major setbacks in life can be truly devastating, and the pain and trauma extremely difficult to rise up from again. In such times of loss or trauma, it is vital to allow yourself to feel your true emotions. To effectively process and heal from traumatic events. hardship and bereavement, we must acknowledge our raw feelings. Grief and trauma are deeply private and personal journeys with no rules and no deadlines.
However, do not allow the ego to keep you trapped indefinitely in a place of anger, bitterness, hopelessness, or self-pity. If left unattended for too long, our initial emotional responses to the negative event can become toxic in a way that simply keeps us away from our truly divine self and our future happiness.
Yes, it is always hard work to release intense loss or trauma and move forward. It takes courage, self-awareness, and inner strength. However, if you proceed with faith, trusting and believing that this too shall pass, and that there is a reason for everything, even if you don’t understand it right now, you will ultimately be able to move forward in a healthy and productive way.
No matter what happens to you in life, you will grow stronger and wiser by working through it. Regardless how intense the dark night of your soul may be, move forward step by step, day by day, trusting that you can heal and will become stronger. Focus on self-care and loving yourself and hold the faith that better days are coming into your life. We all deserve to be happy and have inner peace.
Harmony In Your Relationship
How does one achieve true harmony in a relationship? This is probably the most elusive aspect in most relationships these days. Sadly, a happy and healthy relationship cannot be achieved without it also being a harmonious relationship!
To achieve harmony in any relationship, we need to address the following two aspects with honesty and courage.
Firstly, what do you require from the relationship? Are your needs being met, or is the relationship all about them? Too often people settle for a bad relationship instead seeking to fulfill their own wants and needs.
Remember, you matter. You must also be your priority, not just your partner. Your wants and needs are a priority. If you put your needs aside and put everyone before yourself, you will never find harmony or joy in your relationships.
Make a list of your top ten wants or needs. Then make a list of your top five deal-breakers. What will you not tolerate or settle for? Once you have clarity on what you need and expect, you can more easily figure out what to do about it.
A healthy relationship goes both ways, with comprise. Do your best to see that you stay true to your wants and needs. Too many people settle, because they either think they cannot find someone better, or they are scared to move forward on their own. But we must be brave to achieve what we desire in life.
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you are going to find it. You deserve it! You are worth it! If you put all of that out to the Universe and believe it, it will happen for you when the time is right. Belief is key. If you believe it, you will achieve it.
Seeing Yourself As You Truly Are
The art of ‘being seen’ begins within. It is not in the eyes, or heart, of an external beholder. It is the grace of being able to see oneself through the Divine Eyes of our Creator.
Every soul is unique. No two are the same. Each soul emanates from the Supreme Loving Source to offer its unique beauty and pleasure to God in an incomparable, individual way. When we look at ourselves through this lens, the true beauty, light, and power of the spiritual spark of our being shines upon our inner vision.
Relationships offer mirrors too. But what they show vary according to the quality of the reflecting surface. And what we see in them depends upon how well we know, see, and stand in the truth of our own higher self.
For example, if I look at myself in a broken mirror, do I see a crack in my face? I might…if I am not sure of who I am. However, if I know myself to be whole, I can readily recognize that the crack is in the mirror, and not in my face.
Similarly, there are relationships in life that reflect broken images back to us. That does not mean that we are broken, nor that the other person or people involved are broken either. We all have wounds and scars and other gaping holes yet to be healed, or not.
Whatever the case may be, it is the relationship itself that offers up the reflective element. It is the dynamic of exchange that shows itself as either clean, clear, balanced, cracked, smeared, skewed, and so on.
Knowing oneself in truth and wholeness is thus extremely valuable. If we do not possess such certainty of self, we may accept a broken or distorted impression projected by an ill-functioning relationship to be a reflection upon ourselves.
A Sincere Apology Is Good For The Soul
One of the most difficult things in life is knowing when to apologize. It is obvious in some situations, but in others not so much. There are times when we need to weigh out all our options. Is the situation worth an apology, even if you are not the one who created a problem?
Knowing the right time to apologize is critical to the resolution. Was it done intentionally, or was it unintentional? Did the action cause others stress, worry, or pain?
You must also ask yourself if you can live without apologizing the rest of your life. Is it worth losing a friendship, leaving a group, resigning from a job, or not speaking to a family member ever again?
The good old Golden Rule can always come in handy in this dilemma. If you have done something that you would not want done to you, then apologize and seek atonement! Many people find it almost impossible to apologize. They struggle to acknowledge their own part in an argument or wrongdoing.
Some just do not seem to understand their actions were unacceptable, or they always feel that the world is out to get them. There is no compromise in their mind. They always try to twist every situation to make it seem like it is another person’s fault.
For some people, on the other hand, an apology seems to roll off their tongue a little too easily. When a sincere apology is made it must be followed by actions. Actions speak louder than words. By not repeating the offense, for example, it shows a true and sincere apology.
Sometimes all the other person needs to hear is a sincere, “I am sorry.” When we accept responsibility for our actions, we tell others we are sorry for hurting them. It is not always easy, but releasing guilt always is good for the soul.
Pay It Forward With Holiday Gratitude
As the year end approaches, most of us would normally be shopping, entertaining and gathering with friends and family to celebrate the various holidays and the New Year. Lots of special food, drink and laughter would also be the order of the day!
With a few exceptions, many of our usual traditions are however being curtailed this year due to the COVID-19 pandemic. This year, at a time when holiday shopping, traditional music and festive lights usually brighten the scene, many of us will have to be low-key and socially distanced, even isolated and alone.
In addition, although many people will be able to celebrate virtually, those with limited access to technology will not, so some loved ones will be forced to limit their contact to the telephone only, or even do without.
It is therefore even more important this year to think of those who will not be able to find an easy way to compromise or ‘make-do’ with alternative online shopping or virtual socializing.
Give thought to those you personally know who may have been cut off from their usual social activities, friends and relatives. Perhaps you can make an extra phone call or two, or send an old-fashioned Christmas card by postal mail, or surprise them with the delivery of an unexpected little gift.
Let just one person outside your intimate family circle know that they are still in your thoughts, even though you cannot visit or see them in person. It can make really make a world of difference for someone who is unable to get out to visit friends, or welcome family this year.
Many people have also lost loved ones in recent months and will be grieving this Christmas, instead of celebrating. If you know someone who is in this predicament, do reach out to them and offer a comforting word and some emotional support. Even just a little can go a very long way!
Time To Cleanse The ‘Energy Clutter’ Of 2020
The year 2020 is coming to an end. It has been a challenging year for most of us, to say the least. Some have lost everything that they thought was important in their lives, while others discovered what truly is important in their lives.
In many cases, the material and superficial things that we used to cherish so much have now been replaced by the simple longing to just hug a loved one, touch a friend’s hand, or just be part of a crowd of like-minded people at a music festival or sports event.
It has indeed been an exceedingly difficult year for our relationships, social life, careers, businesses, finances, and especially our mental health and well-being. The lockdowns, social distancing and mask wearing (or lack thereof) has been taking its toll.
Mental illness is said to at an all-time high, and suicides rates have increased significantly. Families will be celebrating the holidays this year without one or more of their family members, and many are having to grieve the tragic passing of a loved one.
You may look at all this stress, chaos and suffering, and ask yourself if any possible good can come from the events and circumstances of the past year?
Well, I do believe 2020 to be the best opportunity we will ever have in our lifetime to truly find the deeper meaning and purpose of life. This is the ideal time to identify everything that is not important in our lives and release what no longer serves us.
This is a time to cleanse your aura, clear your vibration, and discard the ‘energy clutter’ in your life. Loving and caring for yourself is fundamental at the moment. Be kind to yourself and do not judge yourself harshly for things you have no control over. Just do the best you can with what you have and take it one day at a time. We are simply being sidelined for a period of time. This to shall pass.
White sage is my go-to for clearing my living space and my personal energies. When bad vibes and negative energy clutter start to pile up, I take a few moments to simply breathe and relax, cleanse my aura with white sage, then breathe again. It lifts my inner being.
How To Have Peace And Calm This Christmas
The year 2020 has been quite a year! The pandemic has turned the world upside down. Given what we have all been through, there is now an increased emotional need to have something to celebrate, and with Christmas around the corner, we have just that.
However, as magical a time of year as Christmas may be, it can still be somewhat stressful, and this year may prove even more challenging due to the need for safety precautions, social distancing and travel restrictions.
Nevertheless, with a little pre-planning, you should be able to get your Xmas off to a good start and enjoy the celebrations to the maximum without experiencing too much stress and drama in the process! How good is that? Here’s how.
Set Clear Intentions
Given the kind of a year we have experienced, we can indeed be excused for not celebrating a perfectly traditional Christmas this year. We are now in an excellent position to enjoy the kind of Christmas that we prefer.
Let go of the idea this year that Christmas must be ‘perfect,’ and that you must make it that way for everybody. Set instead a clear intention for what your ideal Christmas will be. After that, all you need to do is make plans that go along with your vision. Having established what Christmas really means to you, you can then use it as a guide to prepare your celebrations.
Keep It Simple
Simplicity ensures peace and calm, whereas complexity causes stress and drama. It really is as simple as that! It is imperative that any Christmas plans you make are as simple, straightforward and as streamlined as possible. Doing so should help to create a sense of calm and empowerment, which you will no doubt need to take into the New Year with you.