self-compassion
Lead By Example – A Message From My Guides
Many of you lead by example, without having to think about it. You obey traffic signals. You pick up garbage if you accidentally drop it. You hold doors open for others. You smile at strangers. You volunteer. You support local charities.
Entering the second month of this new decade, it might be a good time to re-think some old habits, and also lead from within.
For example, it may be a good idea to tone down those automatic, knee-jerk thoughts of annoyance, anger or retribution when someone pushes all-too-familiar buttons. Instead of allowing the cortisol and adrenaline to skyrocket within your body, think things through, before reacting negatively. Resist the urge to speak hurtful comments, even if your basic premise is sound. Find a constructive way to get your point across.
Sometimes it is tempting to jump on the bandwagon for likes and shares on social media platforms. However, if the topic is not kind, hold your tongue. Instead, be the person who can be counted on for level-headed discourse, without vitriol.
In general, be kind to others. Give people some leeway when it is evident that they are trying their best. Catch them doing something right, instead of watching for errors and omissions. Give recognition and praise where warranted. It can mean so much and does not cost anything.
Be kind to yourself too. Banish negative self-talk. Give yourself the right to be human and allow yourself to make mistakes, without chastising yourself for an unimportant oversight. If a serious error does occur, do your best to rectify the issue in a timely manner, with a ‘note-to-self’ that you have learned from the situation and will not repeat it.
Love Is The Healing Force
I grew up in a Christian family. In fact, it was going to seminary, and exploring world religions, that eventually led me to practice metaphysics and intuitive consulting as a full-time profession. Being trained and ordained in a Christian organization has also given me a unique perspective on alternative spirituality and metaphysics.
Jesus is, in fact, one of the spiritual guides I connect with when I work with people. This has made me realize that Jesus, the central figure in Christianity, is often misunderstood by many people. In the many years of connecting with Jesus, I am confident that he never had the intention to create a formal, organized religion. In fact, often the religious attributes attached to Jesus are far more complex than his original core message.
Jesus taught very simple strategies for life. I think sometimes these strategies are considered too simple by some people. When asked, Jesus was able to sum up his teachings in three simple statements. Someone inquired about an authentic spiritual path and Jesus gave two commandments and then gave a third statement, “In these two commandments rest all of the law and the prophets.”
This third statement is quite profound. He was stating that every spiritual text that had ever been written, or would ever be written, could be summed up in two commandments. This means that in Jesus’ perspective, if a person simply abided by these two commandments, they would be fulfilling the fundamental guidelines associated with religious and spiritual practice.
If you are interested in Jesus’ teachings, or interested in following the path he taught, then the good news is that you are already following the second ‘commandment.’ I have been living on this planet long enough to recognize that every person is already following this second commandment, which says, “Love your neighbor as yourself.”
To Fester, Or Forgive
Recently, a peer did a short talk on forgiveness, as part of a healing service. Besides her being courageous, sharing aspects of her personal challenges with parents and peers, she also offered a reminder of how instrumental forgiving ourselves is in our healing journey.
The reptilian, primitive part of the brain has a default state of always monitoring its environment. The hunter-gatherer ancestral days had us on constant alert. Anxious. Awaiting possible threat by the saber-tooth tiger. But our modern brain has evolved such, that when we are not active in a task, the brain occupies itself with dwelling on the past.
The idle brain tends to ponder past events and unpleasant thoughts, that in the default state, fill us with anxiety. Pain. Guilt. Self-blame. Shame. Anger. Disappointment.
The typical memories and thoughts, that can consume us in this default state, vary. Some are large and life-changing, such as the loss of a loved one or favorite pet, financial loss, divorce, adultery, retrenchment, and physical or emotional abuse. Others are more behavioral or emotional, but can be just as debilitating.
When our life is ‘heading south’ and we cannot seem to turn things around, we tend to replay the situation. This can lead to becoming more depressed, and having more reason to doubt ourselves. A vicious cycle can result. We spin and spin…like laundry in the dryer, being tumbled. If we remain in that dryer, resentment sets in.
Charity Begins At Home
My mother always said, “Charity begins at home.” But what exactly is this supposed to mean?
The first thing we might do is attempt to identify what a ‘home’ is and what it means to us. You could own a mansion, live in a studio apartment, or reside in a mobile home. No matter where we live, home is typically where we make ourselves comfortable, cook our meals, watch TV, care for our children, and rest after a long day at work. It is that safe, comfy place that we create for ourselves, based on our values and beliefs about who we are and what we hope to accomplish.
However, there is a different kind of home that each of us dwells in, that is also based on our sense of self, what belief systems we hold, and what we think we can accomplish for ourselves. This is our ‘inner home.’
In our ‘outer home’ we may have a big screen TV, state of the appliances and designer furniture. We are often so amazingly proud of ourselves, that we were able to accumulate all these luxury items that the world outside has convinced us we must have.
But then one day, we come home from work and discover someone has broken in and stolen all our expensive accumulations. What a disaster! Fortunately, these material things can easily be replaced.
Be The Star Of Your Show!
Are you the star of your own show? If not, then maybe it is time. For once put yourself first by honoring your spirit, your sacred body temple, and the higher work you have been called to complete in this lifetime.
You can begin by honoring your spirit with deeply soulful ‘food.’ This can take the form of meditation, prayer, or simply enjoying whatever self-care activity or spiritual practice feeds your spirit the most. But in doing so, it is important to consciously disconnect from the mundane world around you, and allow the blissful energy of Spirit Divine to pour in.
As I write these words, I can literally feel the healing energy of the sunlight bathing me, even though I am logging on from deep in the cold Rockies on a cloudy afternoon. This intense energy is a message to my soul that each of us has the ability to tap into spiritual warmth and renewal within a single thought.
My late mother used to call this connection with the Divine the I AM presence that is abundantly accessible to us all. It is important to tap into this presence as a reminder that we are spirit energy, divinely guided, protected, and in ‘the spotlight of our own shows.’
Being a ‘star’ also means that you must take deliberate time to honor your sacred body temple. You do this by enjoying healthy foods and balanced nutrition.
Do Psychics Ever Get Cheated On?
I have been asked if psychics ever get cheated on, since we can perceive other’s intentions and foresee future events. Unfortunately, the answer is yes. And there are several reasons for this. But I can only speak for myself on this issue. I don’t know for sure about other psychics, but for me it is difficult to foresee my own future.
I don’t believe anyone enters a relationship with the intention of becoming the victim of cheating, but people and circumstances change over time. People grow apart. Someone who was devoted in the beginning may not be as loyal later on.
Now, this doesn’t mean that the signs weren’t there and they were ignored. I often try to see the best in people and I tend to ignore the negative stuff. Even when it’s screaming at me.
As a psychic, being in a situation where my partner is cheating is beyond painful. I often know what he is going to do, before he does it. I know what he is doing, when he is doing it. And, at times, I am more or less forced to ‘watch’ it all happen due to flashes of clairvoyant vision.
People have a tendency to be unfaithful in their thinking weeks, or even months, before actually acting upon their impulses. They begin the process by seeking out new romantic partners. Or, having secret conversations with a potential lover. Or, even searching their current partner’s emails and messages looking for evidence of infidelity, so they can justify their own unfaithful behavior.
Sometimes the cheater becomes suspicious, or even paranoid, of everything their partner does and says. They refuse to believe anything that is said. Because, they, themselves cannot be trusted. Therefore, it is impossible for them to trust anyone else, or their motives. Typically, a guilty conscience is expressed as suspicion and false accusations of another, and a clear indication of someone’s own infidelity.
Unconditional Love Is Heaven On Earth
When I was a little girl, I remember going to my grandparents’ home during the summers. I couldn’t wait for the summer to arrive, to get to spend time with them. It was always magical. The months leading up to those wonderful stays were always filled with anticipation and excitement.
Always having something to look forward to adds to the enjoyment and contentment of life. Whether it’s an upcoming event or something we are looking forward to, such trying an adventurous activity, or reading that new book you’re excited to dive into. Books have always been for me a bit of a mental vacation, because you can relax, while going places to imaginative places in your mind.
I believe the magic and enjoyment of getting to spend time with my grandparents came from it being filled with love and attention. Thinking back now, they were the only adults, when I was younger, who gave me their full attention and truly unconditional love. They were never too busy to sit and talk with me, or share stories from their childhood, which I found very fascinating.
Not all Grandparents are alike though. Some can be all about gossip, judgment, neglect, even abuse, and not the best role models. I was lucky that on my mother’s side of the family this was not the case. My maternal grandparents had all the traits and attributes one would imagine a truly loving grandparent to have.
I have memories of being in tears when having to leave and go back home. There I just spent my days alone in my room, as my parents were often too busy with church and other social groups they were involved in. I suspect all that time I was forced to spend on my own, helped me to expand and open my mind, to tap into those deeper areas of the psyche that are often left dormant.