children
Why Some Souls Depart This Life Early
In over 15 years of doing spiritual readings, I’ve had to deal with some very difficult questions from clients who have suffered extreme loss or trauma.
One of the most heartbreaking, however, is making sense of the death of an infant, child, or young adult, sometimes after a cruel and very unpredictable death.
Grieving the death of a young person can bring up some of the most profound and challenging emotions. While it is never easy to address this kind of loss with grieving parents and relatives, Spirit has been consistent in its guidance over the years.
Although I have been spared the loss of someone so young in my own life, I am no stranger to it. I have supported many families in this regard over the years, both professionally and in my personal life.
The first time I realized how fragile life really is, was when I was only 12 years old. I was looking forward to the summer vacation from school. One of my classmates who lived down the street and her family had relatives visiting for the summer. Two of the visiting cousins were more or less our age, so I had a nice group of girl playmates for the season!
There was also the younger brother of the visiting cousins, who was only six years old. He was an adorable child with blond hair, bright blue eyes, and a freckled face full of mischief. He followed his two sisters, my girlfriend, and me wherever we went during those carefree days. I did not mind having him around and even encouraged the others to let him play hide-and-seek and many other childhood games with us.
Coping With The Loss Of A Loved One
Many people I know, including myself and several of my clients, have experienced the loss of a child or grandchild.
Losing a grandparent or parent is heartbreaking, but losing a child is absolutely devastating! It is difficult to understand why someone so young is taken before they had a chance to live a full life.
A few years ago, I found some solace for my continuing grief from a very unexpected source.
I am an avid Nascar fan. If you don’t know what Nascar is, it is the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing. Stock car racing is one of the largest spectator sports in America.
A few years ago I watched an interview with one of the masters of this sport, Richard Petty, also known as “The King.” His words struck a deep chord with me.
Richard Petty’s grandson, Adam Petty, was also a racer like his grandfather. He was only 19 when he died in an accident on May 12, 2000 while practicing the sport he loved so much. His car hit the outside wall of the track, killing him instantly.
In the interview I watched, his grandfather spoke of his depression, guilt, grief, and not wanting to get out of bed because he felt he was somehow to blame for encouraging his grandson to pursue this sport that cost him his young life.
Work-Life Balance For The Single Parent
Single parents face many daily challenges and can easily feel overwhelmed. This is especially difficult when juggling childcare, household responsibilities, and your career or business.
It is undoubtedly important to maintain a healthy work-life balance in your life, but it is easier said than done. How does one balance work, family, life, and love as a single parent in the busy world we live in?
Here are some simple strategies for single parents to achieve a better work-life balance.
Work-Life Boundaries. The first important step is to set boundaries between your work and home life. I find that this is often a key element that is missing in the lives of many of my clients.Without clear boundaries between work and home, it is very difficult to be fully present and focused on one or the other at any given time. Without defined boundaries, the single parent is constantly straddling two worlds.
Creating work-life boundaries simply means not mixing business with pleasure. You designate specific times and activities for work and specific times and activities for spending time with your children. This means no thinking about work, no work-related texting, no checking email, and no taking phone calls outside of your designated work time.
The Miraculous Roll Of Film
I have experienced many miracles and magical events in my life. As you read the following incredible story, you will see why I have chosen this particular one to best illustrate my experiences.
When I was 18 years old, I was working at a pre-school in my home town. One of the pupils was a three-year-old girl with whom I felt a real connection. She was an old soul; a bright and talented young artist.
But she usually came to school with unwashed, unbrushed hair and dirty clothes. She would never bring a packed lunch. When her parents came to collect her from school, they were often late and, unlike the other children, she did not run into their arms. There was clearly a disconnect between parent and child.
Eventually I moved several hours away and stopped working at the school. But I still thought of her often and prayed that she was well. A few years after I left, I made some enquiries, but no one knew what had happened to her. I hope she survived her difficult childhood and continued to create art, which I believed may have been her saving grace.
Two decades later, I was visiting the area around my hometown to go hiking with friends in a nearby national park. One day, one of my friends climbed a big rock and I followed him. Then he jumped down and I noticed what looked like something he had accidentally left behind.
“Hey, you dropped your roll of film up here,” I shouted, holding up the roll I’d found on the rock. But it turned out not to be his film and that someone else must have left it there. Maybe that person had the same idea of climbing the rock to take some pictures of the magnificent view.
Rebuild Your Trust In A Benevolent Universe
Have you ever watched a child learn to ride a bicycle? There is a certain excitement associated with this rite of passage as youngsters wholeheartedly embrace the possibility of being able to soon ride down the street without help.
The first time they get on a bike, they have no prior knowledge or experience to compare it to. Nevertheless, it is usually easy for most children to accept that they will be able to accomplish this task.
Most kids, in their innocence, focus on the joy, freedom and fulfillment of riding a bike rather than worrying about not being able to do it, let alone falling and getting hurt. They also don’t think in terms of good or bad ‘luck’ determining their ultimate success, nor do they imagine that riding a bike is a special gift, talent or privilege reserved only for certain people.
Perhaps this self-belief stems in part from an encouraging parent who has confidently assured the young person that they will indeed be able to achieve this skill. Perhaps the child has seen other children learn to do it and therefore trusts that they can do it, too.
The thing about children is not so much that they blindly or foolishly trust, but simply that, unlike most adults, they have not yet learned to distrust. Being able to trust as an adult is therefore not so much a matter of learning to trust, but of regaining the ability to trust that we once had, until we lost some or all of it through trauma, disappointment, betrayal, or hardship.