News and Views From The Psychic Access Community

victim mentality

Victims And True Feelings

click here for a free reading at PsychicAccess.comWhat is the difference between being a victim and feeling like a victim? Well, the first is identifying as a victim and making decisions from that base as a way of life. The other is going into the wounds of whatever happened to them, where they were a victim, and feeling those feelings, exploring them, processing them and allowing them to be released, as a part of the journey of healing.

Healing is waking up, coming out of denial. You finally admit you were hurt, abused, abandoned, raped, lied to, robbed, beaten up and that yes, it hurt. Yes, there was terrible fear and a loss of self, a loss of faith, depression, anxiety, and so much more. This stage is shocking, and it hurts. Your ego is demolished as you finally cave into the realizations and emotions that emerge as you face the truth about what happened to you, instead of minimizing it, explaining it away, or muscling through it.

Grieving, Raging And Learning

You will inevitably need to move through the grief cycle in order to find hope and healing. This process can take two years and longer. Many people will not understand that you are grieving, since you haven’t lost anyone to death. This process is not linear. It twists and turns through loops that overlap, moves forward, and then falls back again. Continue reading

Emotional Self-Care Through Daily Spiritual Practice

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAcccess.comFor those that are highly sensitive, including psychics, mediums, healers and empaths, awareness and self-care are critical to our overall well-being. If you are an individual that fits into this group and you are not doing daily maintenance on your emotional well-being and spiritual body, then you are leaving the gate wide open for an attack that can not only impact your emotions, but also your mental and physical health. This maintenance is achieved primarily through a daily spiritual practice.

Spiritual practice can be anything from prayer to meditation and is defined as the regular performance of actions and activities for the purpose of inducing spiritual experiences and cultivating spiritual development. Simply put, spirituality is the way you choose to find meaning, hope and inner peace in your life.

If you already adhere to a specific faith, tradition or religion, wonderful, but be certain that you are taking time each day to actively engage with your beliefs. Why is this important? Research has shown that those that engage in a regular spiritual practice live longer, and are healthier mentally and physically.

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Why I Do Readings

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAcccess.comThe main thing I notice about being a channel is the focus on what healing is, its purpose, and how being a healer in service to others is held against being selfish.

If someone is fulfilled by sacrificial service (victim-savior relations) and this is their mission in life, then they would likely derive the greatest joys from this kind of sacrifice, because Spirit would bring them seekers who want that type of service. It is a sacrifice, indeed, although often cleverly disguised as a helping venue.

In any case, one can pick any way of healing that resonates for you. For me, I find that I prefer to educate my clients in terms of what an empath can and cannot (or should not do) in my opinion. Personally, I am not fulfilled by victim-savior scenarios. I don’t find them to be healthy on any level.

All the same, I used to fall into the trap of trying to ‘fix’ people, to the point that it was my main modus operandi in life – being prey for others that are seeking life source energy from others. I discontinued doing that when I realized several truths:

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Using Labels To Avoid Doing The Work

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAcccess.comI’m an introvert. I’m dysfunctional. I am an empath.

It is good to know about yourself. However a retreat into generalized labels will be an obstacle to further work. Generalizations are just that, generalizations. Generalizations are good for a quick conversation, but not for depth.

Now that you have learned something about yourself and have a label, you have some vocabulary to do more research on tools for healing. Now that you know your fallback position (I run away, I don’t set boundaries) you can start to learn about other tools, other choices.

In order to apply new choices, in order to catch your dysfunctional patterns you will need to be mindful. Mindfulness entails being specific, very specific, regarding each incident, each choice. Just like taking a daily inventory. Specificity and detail are needed to observe your current choices, to learn what Spirit is trying to teach you, and also for you to be able to note and celebrate progress made. Just like going on a diet, you need to be real, specific, use facts, use accurate information (as much as possible) via daily tracking and detailed recall.

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Why Empaths Fall Victim To Narcissists

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comWhy are narcissists and empaths often drawn to one another? This is a phenomena many of us empaths fall victim to. Which, at first, may seem odd, since empaths and narcissists are polar opposites! But, maybe that is the key? Opposites attract.

But, what’s more profound, is that the narcissist preys upon the empath’s dedication to healing those who are emotionally wounded or scarred. By nature empaths are deeply caring, compassionate people. The empath’s purpose in life is to support healing in others, yet due to their intense sensitivity, empaths often struggle to create healthy boundaries for themselves, giving in to martyrdom, victimhood, co-dependency, and chronic self-sacrifice.

An empath will do anything in their power to help or heal another. And, will not easily give up or walk away. This makes them prime targets for the narcissist.

There are different types of narcissists. But, for this article, I will discuss the most common. And, that is the Amorous Narcissist. They tend to measure their self-worth and grandiosity by how many sexual conquests they have conquered. This type of person is known for using their charm to ensnare others with attention, flattery and gifts. But, they dispose of their target once they become bored or when their needs have been served. The target typically won’t so much as get an explanation, much less a goodbye.

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Energy Vampires And Psychic Bullies

click here for a free reading at PsychicAccess.comIs someone or something draining your energy? Most of the time it’s someone whom you are either trying to please, or get approval from, or someone you’re trying to help. You may begin to notice that something changes in your energy field each time you are around this person, or that you feel an imbalance of some sort afterwards. When I say being around a person, this can mean exposure to them through meeting in person, texting, talking over the phone, and even energetically, or psychically.

Energy bullies and psychic vampires are very good sucking the life force right out of you. Unfortunately, you may not notice this is happening, until after the fact. However, once you realize what has happened, identifying it is the first step to proactive healing, regeneration, and protection from allowing it to happen again.

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Are You A Magnet For Drama And Chaos?

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comOne of my clients recently relocated to a quieter area, after many years of living a city life. Naturally, she was anticipating a more tranquil existence in her new rural setting, as well as in her new job in a ‘not-so-corporate’ environment. But her new lifestyle did not live up to her expectations. Her geographical change still brought with it a fair amount of chaos.

“What is it with me?” she asked me. “I am like a magnet for drama, and I want the chaos to stop!” Although I kept my focus on doing a reading for her with psychic tools, this was quite a challenging question or me personally, because I had, in fact, also been attracting my own share of drama these past few years.

From my own experience, I know that a certain amount of drama can feel temporarily invigorating, as it prompts the body to produce an adrenaline rush. It can produce a pleasant surge of energy. But it can eventually become particularly debilitating when we are in continuous adrenal overdrive. It’s not an advisable state to be in constantly. After all, we are spiritual beings in a body, and spiritual teachings advise a balance of work, sleep, rest and play!

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