self-sabotage
The Simple Secret To True Happiness
It is easy to become too focused on the pursuit of happiness, to the detriment of true happiness. For many years, I was constantly setting goals for my ‘future happiness,’ only to eventually realize that I had been missing out on the joy available in the present moment.
I am certainly not alone in this, as I find many of my friends and clients tend to postpone joy and contentment, believing that they will finally be happy once they have achieved milestones, or acquired certain possessions.
Meanwhile, the key to living one’s best life is to fully embrace the present moment. This does not mean that we should stop dreaming of a better future or no longer pursue important personal goals. However, our future hopes and ambitions should not cause us to put our life on hold, nor prevent us from being fully immersed in the now.
If you are also someone with such an intense future-focus, I encourage you to begin living more in the present. You will soon discover a more fulfilling and joyful way of life.
Future-Focused Thinking
The first step is to let go of future-focused thinking. Many of us tend to constantly think about the future, worrying about what lies ahead or longing for future achievements. This mindset deprives us of the beauty and opportunities that exist in the present.
Left Holding The Bag
One of my clients recently said, “I’m the one left holding the bag.” Have you ever been ‘left holding the bag?’ This is when you are put in a situation where you are unfairly held responsible, because other people fail or refuse to take responsibility.
The expression “left holding the bag” originated in 18th-century Britain, but at the time it referred to a person being caught with stolen goods, while the rest of their criminal gang escape responsibility.
Many of us are left holding the bag at some point in our life. This is especially true for empaths, healers and highly sensitive people. They are often the scapegoat in their family, or the friend who is taken advantage of, or the coworker who has to pick up the pieces when others neglect their duties.
The solution for this is often found in spiritual self-empowerment, inner child healing, energy shielding, or simply the setting of boundaries. These are challenges I often assist clients with.
A client was about to purchase a bed and breakfast establishment with the support of an investor. When the day came to sign the papers, the investor decided it was just too much to deal with at the time. This left my client ‘holding the bag,’ having to find a new investor.
Another client was abandoned by her siblings when their mother’s mental and physical health suddenly began to deteriorate, and she was left to her own devices having to care for her mom with no assstance or support from the rest of the family.
Find The Spiritual Gold Outside Your Comfort Zone
Some people are not ready or strong enough to embrace the truth, nor the unfamiliar. And that’s okay. We are all at different stages in our soul evolution. Energetically we are like magnets that resonate with those who are on the same frequency, and bounce off those who do not share our level of understanding. And that is okay.
The more evolved and sensible we are spiritually, the more open we are to embrace new information and learn from the acquired insight and wisdom of others. The higher our vibration, the less likely we are to overreact with extreme resistance, or become anxious or annoyed when we are confronted with inconvenient new realities.
Resistance and defensiveness stem from the ego. The ego tends to hinder us from being present and truly connecting, learning, growing, and expanding. This ultimately keeps us from evolving spiritually.
I have always been a firm believer that the teacher will appear when the student is ready. Those who are no longer held back by the human ego, are more ready and open to receive new information and explore deeper wisdom on a soul level.
We need not unconditionally agree with everything, but one can always find some ‘gold’ in whatever crosses our path. There is always some nugget of wisdom or insight we can use, even if we choose to discard the rest. There is always something of value that we can add to our toolbox of personal growth and soul expansion. There is always something new to learn or discover.
We Choose Our Way Of Being In The World
Our material belongings reveal much about how we tend to operate in this world. For example, I can look at the make of a person’s vehicle, as well as the model, size, and color, and instantly get a sense of how they navigate through life. I further believe we also choose our way of being in this world, based on our spiritual mindset.
A good friend and I own the same make of car, but different models. Mine happens to be a smart car and hers is a jeep. This makes perfect sense to me in terms of our personalities and lifestyle.
I am small in stature, so it is only logical that my preferred vehicle would also be small, snug and space efficient. She, on the other hand, frequently has to transport passengers, as well as plants, clothes and a variety of household items that belong to the members of her family.
More interestingly, however, is that both of us have experienced the exact same technical problem with our cars. There was a time when both our cars suddenly indicated that the brake lights were no longer functioning.
When that little warning light came on in my car, I immeditately sensed the worst, but I secretly hoped that only the bulbs might need to be changed. To my shock and horror, the entire panel eventually had to be replaced. The day I took the car in to be fixed, I miraculously escaped a major traffic accident on my usual route at my usual travel time, because my car happened to be in the shop. Yes, sometimes a malfunctioning brake light can in fact save your life!
Judgment Limits Your Soul Growth
So, let’s try a different attitude just for today – just so we can experience what it’s like to exist on a higher spiritual frequency and how good it feels to be connected to God, Source, Spirit, Higher Intelligence, the Divine.
To help bring yourself into spiritual alignment and to be a healthier, happier human being, mentally, psychically and spiritually, simply let go of analyzing and evaluating others. The only reason we do this is usually because we are trying to cover up the misalignments in our own life.
When we constantly criticize and judge ourselves and others, we are essentially keeping ourselves trapped in a life on low, shallow energy altitudes. Hence we hinder our soul from achieving wonderful growth.
Some of the unhealthiest, most miserable people I know tend to always judge. They constantly feel the need to analyze and pass judgment on others, and what is worse they often judge themselves much more severely! I mean, if you can’t see it in their aura, you can definitely see it in their face. The eyes are indeed the windows to the soul.
When we have sincere faith in a higher power we simply do not feel the need to constantly judge ourselves and others. When we judge others we only hurt and limit ourselves. Judgment, intolerance and fear hinder our soul growth. So, just for today try a less judgmental attitude. You just might like it! You may even find it’s better to live this way every single day for the rest of your lifetime.
Life is simply too short and precious to spend it indulging in so much judgment and negativity. So, stop blocking yourself from being the best version of you. Do not analyze and evaluate yourself and leave others in peace to deal with their own karma.
Old Baggage Is Not A Badge of Honor
I have successfully worked with many clients over the years who finally found me after they chose to hang onto anger, resentment, bitterness, or self-pity for many years, even decades, to their own detriment. Withe guidance of spirit, I have also helped many people find peace and healing, after they had pushed away everyone in their life away by continuously abusing the patience, compassion and generous support of their friends and family, by burdening them with same, sad story or repetitive dysfunctional behaviors, over and over again.
I have also witnessed the amazing personal growth and miraculous healing of those who were able to let go of the anger and hurts. And I have watched many thrive once they realize that their self-worth and personal power begin outside the comfort zone of their long-standing victim mentality.
I asked spirit for a message today to share with those that are stuck in this way and not moving forward in life. This is what I was given.
Do not dwell upon your pain, do not try to make yourself a martyr in suffering. Stop allowing the things that have hurt you to control where you are in the here and now.
It is time to boldly step up, stand your ground, and say, “I love myself and I am not going to let the past control my life any longer. I am stronger than all that has happened to me. And yes, it hurt me in the moment, but I refuse to drag it with me any longer further, because it prevents me from moving in the direction of my highest good. It poisons my well-being and steals my happiness, and I refuse to allow it any longer.”
Struggling to Make A Decision?
One of the most common themes in psychic readings is the struggle to make a choice or decision. People often come to me for a reading because they are seeking a broader perspective or an assessment of their situation.
Whether their struggle is about love, health, finances, career, business or relocation, I have found the answers from spirit and their guides usually fall into three categories. So, here are my top three spirit-guided recommendations for making difficult life decisions:
Take Some Time Out
Most important decisions do not require an immediate response, even of it may appear to. Take some time to clear your head and think things through. Take a walk, focus on something else, sleep on it, or even just taking a deep breath.
Studies have shown that when we are in the stress response mode we are unable to access parts of our brain that think creatively and logically. Moreover, relaxing your body and mind, and stepping away from the sense of urgency and stress response, will allow you to create space for your intuition to speak up.
Do what you can to relax so you can access those two important aspects of decision making: the problem-solving mind, and your inner guidance.
Tune Into Your Inner Wisdom
Once you have calmed down the physiological stress response you are ready to ‘tune in.’ A great way to do this is to take a deep breath and call upon the wise part of you that already knows the answer to every challenging situation.
Go within and ask that you be shown the path that is the highest and best for all involved and be open to the answers you receive. These can come immediately, or over the next few days. Pay attention and see what signs you see in the form of overheard conversations, billboards, songs on the radio, angel numbers, dreams, gut feelings, and so forth. These are many ways spirit communicates messages to us, so keep an open mind and be aware.