joy
Is Their Kind Gesture Selfless Love?
I’m sure you know some wonderful people who just seem to do or say the right thing at the right time. It really makes you feel good to have friends who go out of their way to bring you some chicken noodle soup when they hear you’re not feeling well. Those friends are like jewels!
I love doing charity work. It makes my heart feel good to just give without wanting anything in return. It is always a great feeling to be able to do something good for another person. It makes me feel like I’m fulfilling my purpose in life to help others in any way I can.
It could be a kind word, or giving them some insight or answers to a question that can set them on the right path in life, or even knitting a scarf for children who don’t have anything warm to wear because their parents can’t afford it. It gives me a sense of happiness that you just can’t get any other way. It makes you feel connected to the source of all that is good and right in this world.
But I have also known people who do things just to get something in return. They will always remind you of this great deed they did just to get something from you. Or they will make you feel guilty for something they did for you. That is not a real friend.
I have also known people who will do things to get a free psychic reading, not realising how much time, energy and dedication it takes to do meaningful psychic work. There are times when I work too much and actually get sick from it. It drains me so much that I have to take a few days or even weeks off.
How To Manifest The Love Of Your Life
The Law of Attraction has become a widely practiced metaphysical principle in popular culture since the success of the 2006 book and film The Secret, which is based on the spiritual teachings of the New Thought movement that began in the late 18th century.
New Thought is a spiritual philosophy based on the notion that everything in the universe is essentially energy, including our beliefs, ideas and thoughts, and that like energy attracts like energy. This is known as the Law of Attraction, one of several universal, metaphysical laws that govern the Universe.
The practice of this universal law to manifest personal goals or outcomes has become more common in post-modern metaphysics and alternative spirituality, especially as information has become more readily available through the Internet.
But while there is a vast amount of information available on the subject today, the Law of Attraction is often misunderstood and poorly applied in the practice of manifestation.
There are certain avoidable pitfalls that cause many inexperienced practitioners to become frustrated, disappointed or to give up before achieving their goals. This is especially true when it comes to manifesting romantic love.
If you have not had the best results with your manifestation efforts and are still hoping to attract a better love life, try the following improvement strategies to increase the success of your manifestation efforts. These techniques can be used to attract a new relationship, as well as to improve an existing relationship or marriage.
The Keys To Manifesting Success
In the book The Law of Attraction, authors Esther and Jerry Hicks write, “The more you come to understand the power of the Law of Attraction, the more interest you will have in deliberately directing your thoughts — for you get what you think about, whether you want it or not.”
Many people practice various manifestation techniques in an attempt to get the Law of Attraction to work for them, including visualization, journaling, prayer, vision boards, focus wheels, affirmations, dreamwork, and so on. Some succeed spectacularly, while others, sadly, fail miserably at manifesting their desires.
If this has been your experience, know that there is always a solution! Since the universal Law of Attraction definitely works for some people, it surely must work for everyone. All that is usually required are a few adjustments to one’s approach to the manifesting process.
Consider the following practical strategies as potential keys to your manifesting success:
Be Relaxed
Try to be as relaxed as possible when doing any kind of manifestation exercise. Stress and tension make us negative, but to manifest we need to be relaxed and positive. We can only attract what we resonate with, because like attracts like. You cannot attract positive things into your life if you are in a negative state of mind. Do your manifesting work in a grateful, joyful mood in a comfortable, quiet environment. Continue reading
Setting Healthy Boundaries With Toxic People
I have often wondered why so many of us tolerate unhealthy, unhappy, and sometimes very dysfunctional relationships with relatives and friends. Too many of us endure the toxic dynamics in our families and friendships, putting up with being the scapegoat, emotional punching bag, financial provider, free therapist, or nanny.
Why is it that many of us tend to keep giving the people in our lives second chances and multiple opportunities to learn and grow, hoping that they will somehow become more considerate, loving, and compassionate?
Meanwhile, we ignore their nasty words, spiteful behaviors, and toxic exchanges. We remain kind, tolerant, and patient. We try to help them lighten up, or connect on a deeper, more caring level. We hope that maybe someday everyone will be happier together and enjoy sharing more love and belonging, instead of dysfunction and drama.
But as the years go by, they continue to disappoint, abuse, and betray us. The loving kindness and mutual support never comes. Try as we might in these toxic situations, the people we love and care about will continue to talk down to us or try to make us feel that we are not good enough. These complicated family and friendship situations can eventually cost us our physical and mental health, our financial security, and our personal accomplishments.
I find this to often be the case with my clients who are gifted, empathic, highly sensitive, and spiritually aware. Some even consider it their purpose or calling in this lifetime. However, while being a wounded healer or earth angel is certainly a noble calling, being a scapegoat or doormat is definitely not! God, Source, Spirit, the Divine wants us to be happy, healthy and safe, and to live our best life.
Embracing Growth Challenges In Your Relationship
At some point in a romantic relationship, we all face challenges that test our connection with our partner or spouse. People disagree, make mistakes, and experience conflict. It’s human nature.
However, it is important to realize that most problems in a developing relationship are often not inherently negative or catastrophic. Instead, they present valuable opportunities for personal growth, healing, and self-discovery.
If you believe that your happiness in a relationship depends on finding the perfect partner, it’s time for a new perspective. The key to a happy relationship is to remove personal barriers one at a time. By doing so, you can fully immerse yourself in love and become a magnet for attracting the right partner into your life.
Consider the following five common issues that many new couples face and how you can learn from them to foster a stronger, more fulfilling connection with your significant other.
The Happiness Myth
Some people go into a new relationship expecting their partner to bring them the complete state of happiness, joy, and fulfillment they have always sought. But others cannot make us happy, joyful, or fulfilled because achieving this is always an inside job. It starts with us.
Karma Is A Teacher, Not An Avenger
People often talk about karma as if it’s some form of divine punishment or retribution that will eventually be visited upon those who have wronged them. Letting karma “take care of it” is a comforting reassurance that we may be rewarded for being the ‘bigger person’ in unfair situations. And certainly it is always advisable to do the right thing when others are being petty or behaving badly.
But this is not karma.
The universe is not in the business of handing out ‘karmic punishment,’ for we are not judged as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ for our choices and actions. All of our choices and actions have value and teach us lessons. So, why would there be any need for a universal system of punishment? Or reward, for that matter?
This is not to say that karma does not exist. On the contrary, we can see karma at work all the time in everyday life, down to the most mundane things we choose to do. However, karma is not a force of reckoning, but the cause and effect of energy, which is a universal law.
When we live a heart-centered life, doing good deeds and being kind to ourselves and others, we will feel joyful, happy, fulfilled and at peace. We thrive in the vibrant flow of positive energy. On the other hand, when we live a heartless life, do things that are wrong, destructive, and evil, and we are unkind or cruel to ourselves and others, we will feel miserable, hopeless, dissatisfied, depressed. We suffer in the thick mud of negative energy.
The Ghosts Of Regret
As part of my training as a spiritual life coach, our class was asked to do a profound exercise. Our task was to imagine ourselves on our deathbed someday, being visited by a gathering of ghosts. We had to imagine these ‘ghosts’ from our past as being very bitter and angry, because they represented all the things we never achieved or succeeded in, coming back to haunt us. They were the ghosts of our unfulfilled goals and dreams returning to die along with us.
We were asked to then review our life and imagine what we would say to ourselves and our ‘ghosts,’ now that our life is over. What would we advise ourselves to do if we could go back in time, get a second chance, and somehow live our life anew?
For me, this was a very thought-provoking process. The first thought for me was my personal ‘bucket list’ of things I still want to experience in this lifetime. For example, I still want to travel on the Orient Express train with my family; see the view from The Shard (a 72-storey skyscraper in London); fly down The Grand Canyon; and witness the splendor of Niagara Falls.
There are many things I still hope to also do. But why have I not done at least some of it yet? Too busy earning a living? Yes, we all get busy, and most of us need to work. However, does this mean we cannot also lead a fuller life?
The next thought the deathbed exercise brought up for me was a sad memory from a few years ago, when my late brother was receiving rehabilitation treatment at a local hospital. We were very close as siblings. He confided in me one day, while we sat looking out the hospital window and saw a young family walking by, that he often feels intense regret and sadness when he sees people with their kids and grandkids, while he had no offspring of his own.