joy
The True Meaning Of Holiday Gifts
While wrapping Christmas gifts for family and friends today, I thought about whether it is better to be on the giving or receiving end of presents during the holiday season?
In my childhood, receiving presents was undoubtedly the best! But my parents also taught me the importance of giving. They gave my sister and me a small allowance during the holidays to buy gifts for others. It was fun to shop for small items to give to our loved ones. With much anticipation, wetried to pick things that people would actually like and appreciate.
I therefore learned early on that while receiving gifts can be exciting and fun, giving them can be even more rewarding.
My parents were certainly on to something, because the value of giving has been scientifically proven to be more than just a sweet sentiment. For example, according to a study by the American Psychological Association, giving to others increases life expectancy by at least five years! Another study found that people who give to others experience lower blood pressure, less depression, and lower stress levels. In addition, giving to others can increase happiness and well-being. A Harvard Business School study found that giving money to someone else increased participants’ happiness more than spending it on themselves.
Navigating Loneliness During the Holidays
The holiday season is traditionally portrayed as a time of togetherness, love, joy, and belonging. We are inundated with media images of families gathered around a festive table, friends celebrating, and communities coming together.
Paradoxically, for many people, this time of year is instead filled with feelings of loneliness, isolation and disconnection.
The root cause is the societal stereotype and cultural assumption that everyone should be joyful, happy, and surrounded by loved ones during the holidays. If you’re not, for whatever reason, it can lead to feelings of inadequacy, isolation, and social failure.
Holiday loneliness is exacerbated by the stark contrast between our actual circumstances and the commercially driven, idealized versions of holiday gatherings and celebrations we see in advertisements, television shows, movies, and social media. This increases feelings of disconnection, low self-esteem, and even depression.
Loneliness during the holidays can have a significant impact on mental health. Feelings of isolation and disconnection during this time of year can exacerbate existing mental health issues and lead to the development of new ones. The constant reminders of togetherness and joy, combined with a lack of social connections and meaningful interactions, can increase feelings of loneliness, leading to emotional distress, feelings of emptiness and hopelessness, and a decline in overall well-being.
Good Old-Fashioned Human Connection
Recently I met up with a good friend whom I had not seen in a long time. Our friendship began nine years ago when I lived in another province of Spain, adjacent to the one where I now live.
Of course, since I moved, we see less of each other. Once in a while I drive over to see her, and a round trip takes me about two and a half hours.
She is a vibrant, kind woman who, along with her extended family, helped me through a particularly difficult time a few years ago. They always made me feel very welcome when I lived there and tried very hard to persuade me not to move away!
She can be great company, but lately she has not been as present as she was when we first met. You might have guessed why. Yes, indeed, social media on her phone has become a major new focus for her. It has become a significant distraction during our visits in recent months.
Knowing how kind, generous and caring she truly is, I do not take it personally. I realize that, like many people around the world, her social media messaging and texting became an important substitute for the lack of personal interaction and social connection during the isolated, lonely times caused by the recent pandemic. For many, it has since become a habit and a new way of life, and for some, an addiction.
A few days ago, thankfully, she had an epiphany for which one can only pray. Instead of her constantly scrolling through her phone, we spent some quality time together for a change, strolling around town, eating lunch, and talking non-stop like we had not seen each other in years!
Finding Your Joy In A Fast-Paced World
Finding happiness, joy and inner peace can be challenging in today’s fast-paced, ever-changing world. The constant influx of new information and misinformation, societal pressures, and the rapid evolution of technology can leave us feeling overwhelmed and disconnected.
But amidst the chaos, there is actually a proven way to cultivate a more joyful state of being that transcends these external circumstances. It is no secret that cultivating some form of spiritual practice can greatly transform your life.
One powerful way to invite more joy into your life is through a gratitude practice. Take a little time each day to reflect on the positive aspects of your life and acknowledge the many blessings you enjoy. This essential spiritual practice will shift your focus from what may be lacking in your life to the true abundance available to you, fostering a much more positive mindset and attracting more prosperity and well-being into your life.
The great country-western singer Willie Nelson once said, “When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around. He is not the only public figure to attribute at least part of his success and fulfillment to an attitude of gratitude. For example, Cathy Hutchison writes that many wealthy people have a gratitude practice, including Oprah Winfrey, Tony Robbins, Cindy Crawford, and Chris Pratt.
Together Again In The Afterlife
There are many different beliefs and opinions about what happens to us after we die. For centuries, philosophers, theologians, and even scientists have pondered whether or not we are reunited with our loved ones in the spirit world when we leave this life.
There are also many people who believe that there is no life after death. They believe that when we die, our consciousness simply ceases to exist. This idea is often based on the idea that our consciousness is a product of our brains, and when our brains die, our consciousness dies with them.
It is often claimed that there is no definitive answer to any of these questions, and that it is purely a matter of “faith.” Well, faith is believing in something without concrete evidence. It is trusting that something is true without any proof.
I have to disagree. For me, the afterlife is not just a matter of mere faith, nor is it a complex question with no real answers. For me, it is a matter of knowing it as truth from personal, first-hand experiences.
Not only have I seen ample evidence in both my professional and personal life that the afterlife does exist, but I also know that when death separates us from our loved ones, it is only temporary, for we are ultimately reunited with them in the spirit realm.
Comparison Poisons The Heart, Mind And Soul
When we are going through difficult times, we tend to compare our struggles and suffering to the lives of others and measure ourselves by their perceived happiness, joy and success.
We often do this these days by comparing our own lives to what others post on social media. Then we judge and mentally torture ourselves for not living up to other people’s highlight reels of happiness and good fortune.
Sure, it is sometimes beneficial to self-reflect and strive for more based on the examples of others who serve as our role models. However, when we indiscriminately compare our own life journey to everyone else’s, we end up diminishing our own uniqueness and value.
While social comparison can motivate us to improve and grow, it can also lead to toxic self-judgment, envy, resentment, and extreme unhappiness. Constantly focusing on the highlights of other people’s lives quickly becomes toxic and self-destructive.
However, this tendency is not a character flaw in some of us. In fact, it is a natural evolutionary instinct that we all have. Our ancestors survived by living in social groups. Our tendency to compare ourselves to others is therefore a very common human trait, rooted in our evolution as a species.
Kindness Will Transform Your Life
Recently, I have noticed that many of my clients are increasingly seeking spiritual guidance for loneliness and feelings of isolation. No matter what their unique circumstances may be, spirit’s response in these matters is always that the solution begins with ourselves.
We must be the change we wish to see in our world in order to live a more connected and joyful life. Yes, the world we live in these days can be very stressful and alienating, but that does not prevent us from being more kind and generous to others.
Whether it is a smile, opening a door for a stranger, saying thank you or have a nice day, giving a compliment, or making a small donation to a charity, these small gestures every day have a magical impact on our lives. Spirit says we have chosen to experience this life and it is part of our soul journey to go out and be the difference we wish to see in this sometimes difficult, chaotic world.
Being kind is a powerful daily reminder to ourselves and others of our interconnectedness; that we are all on this journey together. Whether it’s a small gesture of kindness or a grand act of generosity, the ripple effect of compassion creates a chain reaction that inspires others to pay it forward.