relatives
The Messenger Must Know When To Hold Her Peace
Ever heard of “less is more?” Well, there is a lot of spiritual truth in the saying. It is especially valid in this day and age, where everyone seems to have preconceived ideas and strong opinions on just about everything. Sometimes saying less, or even saying nothing at all, is enough, and usually for the best.
Saying nothing can be very empowering and liberating. We have free will to choose how we want to spend our time and energy. I choose to focus on things that are for my highest good, and those I care about.
It is not our duty to correct every misinformed opinion or ignorant viewpoint we encounter. Does that mean we should be self-absorbed and uncaring? No, certainly not. But we can also not make the world a better place by wasting our precious time and energy trying to fix everyone, and correct everything, while our own inner peace and well-being suffers.
Compassion, charity, and kindness are all much needed in the world today, but not if it is constantly at our own expense. I therefore prefer to wisely pick my battles, and stick to my lane. One person cannot be everything for everyone. We must focus on our own unique strengths and capabilities when helping others.
If we randomly go out on a limb to help everyone with advice and support, it is often not appreciated and frequently met with negativity and resistance. Not to mention trying to point out the facts or truth of a matter, which can be very risky these days! There are some things in life people just need to figure out for themselves. They don’t always need to hear it from us.
Left Holding The Bag
One of my clients recently said, “I’m the one left holding the bag.” Have you ever been ‘left holding the bag?’ This is when you are put in a situation where you are unfairly held responsible, because other people fail or refuse to take responsibility.
The expression “left holding the bag” originated in 18th-century Britain, but at the time it referred to a person being caught with stolen goods, while the rest of their criminal gang escape responsibility.
Many of us are left holding the bag at some point in our life. This is especially true for empaths, healers and highly sensitive people. They are often the scapegoat in their family, or the friend who is taken advantage of, or the coworker who has to pick up the pieces when others neglect their duties.
The solution for this is often found in spiritual self-empowerment, inner child healing, energy shielding, or simply the setting of boundaries. These are challenges I often assist clients with.
A client was about to purchase a bed and breakfast establishment with the support of an investor. When the day came to sign the papers, the investor decided it was just too much to deal with at the time. This left my client ‘holding the bag,’ having to find a new investor.
Another client was abandoned by her siblings when their mother’s mental and physical health suddenly began to deteriorate, and she was left to her own devices having to care for her mom with no assstance or support from the rest of the family.
The Karmic Purpose Of Reincarnation
Do we reincarnate? I know from both personal and professional experience that we do. I also believe we continue to do so, until we have learned all the necessary lessons bestowed upon our soul. We also carry over karmic debt from one life to the next, which we must deal with before we can finally transcend and not return to another lifetime in this world.
Sometimes we experience clear signs and evidence of reincarnation in our daily lives. The most common is meeting a stranger and instantly knowing deep in your soul that you have known them before in another lifetime.
We also witness this in our families and among our friends. I have seen traits and mannerisms of my grandfather, who passed when I was young, in my son who is now an adult. It always makes me smile, as I know where he’s coming from.
I have also come across several people I have known in another life. Sitting in meditation, I have been shown the capacity in which we were connected before. In a past life regression, I have seen how one of my best friends was an archenemy in a past life.
Some people have unusual memories from another time, or a place they have never been, or they often experience déjà vu. Another sign of reincarnation is having recurring dreams about people and places not related to your waking life. Or strongly identifying with a foreign country or culture, or a particular period in history.
How To Deal With Toxic People
Toxic people can be incredibly difficult to deal with in both personal and professional relationships and can be detrimental to your personal happiness and well-being.
A toxic person is someone whose constant negativity and dysfunctional behavior causes drama in your life and drains you energy whenever they are around. Typical toxic traits include negativity, cynicism, apathy, lack of self-awareness, arrogance, entitlement, self-centeredness, domineering behavior, lack of empathy, being judgmental, dishonesty, anger outbursts, to name only a few.
The most extreme forms of toxicity includes personality disorders like antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic personality disorder. A personality disorder is a rigid, deeply characteristic way of thinking, feeling and acting that severely affects the person’s mental well-being, personal relationships and social life.
Toxic people can however be tricky to identify at first, as their dysfunctional traits and behaviors can be very subtle. Some of them are also very good at ‘gaslighting,’ which makes interacting with them even more treacherous.
Gaslighting is a very toxic form of manipulation, game playing, or crazymaking in which you are constantly being misled, confused, lied to, and made to question your own truth and reality. You increasingly feel unsure about the accuracy of your own memories regarding certain events and your personal opinions and perceptions of the world. You may even begin to think that you are to blame for the toxic person’s actions, or that maybe something is very wrong with you, or worse, that you are losing your mind.
Holiday Gift Guide For The Zodiac Signs
You can find the perfect holiday gift for everyone on your list by considering the unique aspects of their astrological sign. Check out the great ideas below to discover the perfect solution for those difficult to shop for loved ones!
Aries
For the Aries people on your list, keep in mind that they love movement! Books, movies, apps or gifts related to cars, travel or the latest exercise trend will get their attention. Since they’re fire signs, you can’t go wrong with candles, incense or fragrances.
Aries also love to read up on the latest news, so consider extending their favorite magazine or streaming subscriptions, or adding a new one to their collection. Pennywise Aries will love a gift certificate to their favorite store, so they can shop for the best deals at all the post-holiday clearance sales.
Taurus
Taurus is the sign of luxury, so consider a gift certificate to their favorite clothing or all-inclusive store or website. In fact, gift certificates for a massage or a favorite restaurant will work too! These earth signs appreciate jewelry, travel and shopping.
Since a Taurus will be the first on the block to own the latest electronics. If you’re going all out, consider a new TV, computer, video game, or cell phone to make their holidays special. For a more practical gift, look for a book, magazine or streaming subscription, or movie about their favorite subject.
The True Power Of Words
What if a change as simple as the words you use could vastly improve your relationships with loved ones? And not just your choice of words, but also the tone and delivery. Healthy, successful relationships require constructive communication and often our relationships fail on our words alone.
Many people fall in love over time purely through conversations they have with each other. Relationships are usually ended with words alone, especially these days when getting unceremoniously dumped via text message is becoming increasingly common. Our choice of words and how we communicate them can evoke waves of joy and happiness, or they can cut like a knife.
We tend to take for granted the people in our lives. We become lazy and complacent and forget to express our gratitude and appreciation for the relationships we have with loved ones. It is vitally important that we adopt better, more spiritual ways to communicate with people who matter to us.
Have you ever stopped to think about the words you use with your loved ones? You most likely speak somewhat differently to total strangers. Or your choice of words is no longer what they used to when you were in love and the relationship was brand new. And how about the words we use when we talk to our children; are we uplifting and encouraging them, or causing them lifelong trauma?
Too often we say things we later wish we can take back. But if we always aim to think before we speak, and seek to choose the very best words, tone, and delivery, then we are much more likely to build the kind of relationships we desire and deserve.
Receiving Spiritual Guidance From Your Ancestors
The ancient tradition of ancestor worship is a powerful, yet often misunderstood spiritual practice. It is typically viewed as a form of idolatry, mainly because of the inaccurate use of the term ‘worship.’
In truth most cultures practicing such rites do not refer to it as ‘ancestor worship.’ The more appropriate terms to use is ‘ancestor reverence’ or ‘ancestor veneration,’ because it is about living descendants paying respect to and seeking the guidance of their loved ones in spirit.
It is a common practice among indigenous people and an integral component of most shamanic traditions. It is not the same as the worship of gods or deities.
In fact, as a spiritual practice it is not much different from looking at old pictures of departed loved ones and rememembering them fondly. We might even tell them how we miss them or share our problems with them. Some of us have even asked them to help us find solutions to problems, or pull a few strings on our behalf from the Other Side.
Although I cannot say I have any special reverence for my ancestors, I do respect them for all the trials and tribulations they experienced while they were in this life. In my ancestral lineage there were courageous prisoner-of-war experiences, the conquering of grievous setbacks and material harships, and even suicides, to mention but a few. Several of my predecessors had truly unique, and even exceptional life stories that still dwell in my cellular memories.
The ancestral technique I use in my spiritual practice is similar to that of the Yoruba people of West Africa. My greatest connection is with my father, and he is the one I communicate with daily in the Yoruba fashion. You can create an altar or sacred space in your home for this purpose.