self-talk
Free Yourself From The Fear Of Rejection
A close friend and college, who is also a psychic medium, had a blind date set up by a friend a while ago. “I think the two of you would hit it off,” the match-making friend promised. Well, my friend and the mystery man initially texted for a couple of weeks and then decided to meet in person.
Due to Covid-19 recommendations at the time, they arranged to meet outside and ended up going for a three hour walk. The date went great! When it was time to part, the gentleman said he hoped they can meet again soon. He clearly seemed to like her a lot.
She agreed as they both seemed to enjoy each other’s company, but on the way home, her old fear of rejection resurfaced. She called me the next day to tell me how it went.
The first thing she said was that he seemed a great person. It was the first time, in a long time, that she had such a good time. But I could sense that something was not quite right. So, I asked her what was the matter?
“I think he is out of my league,” she bluntly said.
“What do you mean,” I exclaimed in surprise.
“Well, he arrived in a brand-new luxury car, while mine is an old jalopy! He is a medical professional, and I just do readings. I am also not smart enough, or pretty enough for a guy like him. My middle-aged body is certainly not what it used to be.
Finding Peace In Your Natural State
While doing a nature hike the other day, the thought occurred to me that we all come from nature, and we eventually also return to nature. This may be why we tend to feel so calm and peaceful when we are out in nature. When we smell a flower, hug a tree, or put our feet in the dirt, it reconnects us to our natural state and brings us back into balance.
It has been scientifically proven that we essentially consist of ‘stardust.’ Our physical body is made of elements that were formed in the stars over the course of billions of years. Our bodies have about 97 percent of the same kind of atoms as that found in the galaxy. As the rock band Kansas so aptly proclaims, “Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky. It slips away and all your money won’t another minute buy. Dust in the wind. All we are is dust in the wind.”
When you look up at the stars in a clear night sky, especially if you’re in a place where the air is clean and at a higher altitude, one can sometimes see the milky way. In such a moment of awe and wonder, it seems to me as if all time stands still. One’s everyday worries seem miniscule and trivial in comparison to the magnificent vastness and endless beauty of the cosmos.
Our connection to nature further brings to mind the classical elements of earth, water, air, fire, and aether that is still observed in various spiritual traditions, such as Ayurveda, Wicca and Gnosticism. Our existence in this life is essentially a magical alchemy of these elements.
In today’s world we tend to focus so much on how things should be, instead of how they actually are. Maybe much of our modern discontent stems from straying so far away from our natural state of being?
Learning To Accept Yourself (Warts And All)
A consistent trend I have noticed doing psychic readings and metaphysical counseling for many years. This trend relates to rejection, and our reaction to being rejected by our human family. It is not natural to abandon or reject loved ones, but in my experience as a pastoral counselor and psychic healer, I have noticed that it is a challenge that many have faced in this life.
Recently, as I was doing a channeling session with one of my clients, this came up and we both had a revelation about our own experiences of rejection. The discussion we had was not only about rejection and how we as humans experience it, but also about how we perceive acceptance. Our experience of rejection comes from only one source, namely our expectation, and also how we resonate with the acceptance we receive from others.
When we are children it is natural for us to allow our parents to be our source. They were the picture of God in our lives, and in ideal situations they were our source of acceptance, providing nurture and stability. Many times, when you see a religious group adopting a vengeful and cruel depiction of the Divine, it stems from a refusal to remove the archetypal depiction from God they experienced with their parents.
Many times, the search for source extends itself outward, and the responsibility of our fulfillment is put on other people or organizations. In some cases, fulfillment is found in substances and can also lead to addictive behaviors. We look to these external ‘sources’ to provide us comfort and satisfaction.
It is natural for us to live in community and relationships, so our endeavors toward fulfillment are often projected outward in our relationships. Unfortunately, since we all have an intrinsic need to identify with and live from Source, we find ourselves continually reaching for fulfillment that we rarely find. This leads to heartache, loss, and broken relationships within the human family.
The True Power Of Words
What if a change as simple as the words you use could vastly improve your relationships with loved ones? And not just your choice of words, but also the tone and delivery. Healthy, successful relationships require constructive communication and often our relationships fail on our words alone.
Many people fall in love over time purely through conversations they have with each other. Relationships are usually ended with words alone, especially these days when getting unceremoniously dumped via text message is becoming increasingly common. Our choice of words and how we communicate them can evoke waves of joy and happiness, or they can cut like a knife.
We tend to take for granted the people in our lives. We become lazy and complacent and forget to express our gratitude and appreciation for the relationships we have with loved ones. It is vitally important that we adopt better, more spiritual ways to communicate with people who matter to us.
Have you ever stopped to think about the words you use with your loved ones? You most likely speak somewhat differently to total strangers. Or your choice of words is no longer what they used to when you were in love and the relationship was brand new. And how about the words we use when we talk to our children; are we uplifting and encouraging them, or causing them lifelong trauma?
Too often we say things we later wish we can take back. But if we always aim to think before we speak, and seek to choose the very best words, tone, and delivery, then we are much more likely to build the kind of relationships we desire and deserve.
Healing Your Inner Dialogue
Most of us talk to ourselves when we are alone, In fact, research findings on this phenomenon dates back as far as the 1880’s, concluding it is a common, normal behavior. However, doing it when others are around is probably less common, but if it makes you happy…go for it!
As spirit beings we all have an inner dialogue going on, pretty much at all times. At times we are highly conscious of it, but mostly it is like a white noise that punctuates the rest of our never-ending thoughts.
But what is this inner dialogue about? What is it saying to you? And what do you believe about the things you hear in this internal conversation? Have you ever stopped to ask yourself these questions? Do you ever pay proper attention to how you’re engaging in this most intimate conversation?
Our thoughts are energy signals that ultimately become our reality. Therefore, our internal dialogue creates the lens through which we are manifesting our daily reality experience. How we think about and interpret our experiences and emotions, what we believe and pay attention to, determines what we are busy creating for our tomorrow.
So, ask yourself right now: are you mostly kind to yourself? Are you optimistic about your life and the future? I often work with clients who are struggling with a negative view of themselves or a deeply pessimistic view of their reality. If this is you, then it is vital that you make some change to self-talk habits and self-sabotaging thought patterns.
Shifting from a negative mindset and pessimistic self-talk, to a place of empowerment requires determination and focused attention. Doing so can supercharge your ability to manifest a state of flow with Universal abundance.
The Courage To Rescue Your Inner Child
Many people wish they had better memories of their childhood. For some the traumatic experiences of their youth is something they would much rather forget. But spirit has shown me that each piece of our life happens for a reason.
Learning to overcome and rise above the negative events in our life enables us to grow and expand. We do not get to pick and choose the parts we like, and discard the rest in the deepest closet of our mind. We become an empowered, improved version of ourselves when we find healing and forgiveness by redeeming even the worst parts of our life experience.
We all matter. We all bring unique gifts to this world. No matter what has happened to us, we must rescue every lost or damaged moment of our life journey. Those tragic events and awful experiences are what molds us into who we are today and who we are meant to become.
Nobody chooses some the things that might happen to them: family dysfunction, separation, divorce, rivalry, abuse, loss, death. As children we often blame ourselves for the things that happen around us, or we block it out, never wanting to remember it again. But this only means that you have left a part of yourself behind in the darkness of the past. But now that you are older and wiser, wouldn’t it be awesome if you could go back and save that part of you?
As a little girl I loved horses and dogs, but we could not afford to keep any. I made up for it by drawing them. My parents could also not afford to buy me expensive drawing paper, so I had to wait until my mom returned from the grocery store, because I would then get the used brown paper bags to draw on. It may seem somewhat silly, but to this day I still buy lots of paper whenever I get the chance! One would think there was going to be a shortage on paper, based on how I tend to stock up.
New Beliefs To Live Your Best Life
The stress and challenges of late and the negative energies in our world in recent times have brought many of us to a point of feeling anxious, frustrated, worried and confused. Some people have even become fearful of leaving their homes. But the time has come to move beyond the negativity and fear and start living our best life again.
Fear is powerful. Fear can keep us trapped in a mental prison of our own making and can prevent us from moving forward. More often than not our worst fears are unfounded and not based in reality or truth.
Belief is also powerful. Beliefs can be negative or positive, true or false. Beliefs originate from within and, again, it is up to each of us to decide if our beliefs are true, or if merely keeps us stuck.
Look deeply at your fears and beliefs. Consider all the fears and beliefs that you sense may be holding you back. Make a list and leave some spaces between each line. When you are done, carefully review your list. Read each line carefully. Once you have done this, think of a truth or positive belief to counteract each of the items on your list and write it underneath each one. Now read the new list out loud to yourself. For example:
False belief: I have no money to do anything.
Counter belief: I do have some money. I have food on my table, a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and I a few extra nickels in my wallet. I do have money to do things. And if I set my mind to it, I can earn some more money.
It is that simple to come up with new beliefs. However, the difficult part is programming each positive statement in your psyche. Therefore, it is important to keep it simple, realistic and truthful.
For example, ‘having a few nickels’ is a simple truth that counters the false belief that you ‘have no money.’ it is simply not true that you have no money. You do have a few extra nickels…and that is indeed money. In other words, you have now erased the lie that you believed and changed it to the truth that is. That is the simplicity of this exercise.