inner peace
Empaths Need Firm Psychosocial Boundaries
Psychosocial balance is tricky for the empath. It requires managing expectations, checking our reactions and emotions, and most especially setting boundaries. Because it is so easy for us to link into the feelings and emotions of those around us, empaths often forget that others may not respond in kind.
For the empath it’s all about balancing your intuitive gifts with your expectations, and finally your responses. Work, friendships, relationships, all the things that encompass our daily lives, require vigilance to ensure that balance is maintained, or chaos will ensue.
For the Type A empath, jobs, friendships and relationships can end very abruptly with major repercussions. The more assertive empath tends to have the motto of “do unto others before they do unto you.” They will leave a job, a relationship or a friendship at the drop of a hat. The more subdued, timid empath tends to stay in miserable job situations, one-sided friendships, and sometimes downright abusive intimate relationships.
At work especially it is very important for all empaths to remember that there is almost always going to be some personality clashes. Others do not always view us favorably. Remember that you are there to do a job – your job. Staying focused on your work, the requirements of that job and your performance is your primary responsibility. Confronting someone, especially a superior, with “what’s your problem, I know you don’t like me” is counterproductive. Similarly the typical response of the introverted empath to quit, or at least never address any issues, is also futile.
Yes, it can be gut-wrenching or infuriating for empaths to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a co-worker or boss doesn’t care for them, or has it out for them, but utilize your gift! As an empath you can read the feelings and intentions of others. This gives you a map to the personalities you are dealing with. Use that information to moderate your own responses to the situation and the individuals you are dealing with in your professional environment.
Finding The Light Within
When we rely on codependent, toxic relationships, materialism and possessions, and other superficial sources of ‘fulfillment,’ it creates a weariness within us. It weighs down the soul. It drowns out the inner light.
Material things and human beings by nature cannot be perfectly reliable all of the time. Material items deteriorate and lose their luster. Friendships and relationships come and go. All that ever truly remains is spirit, and what we do to take care of ourselves. As the world is in dismay in the wake of a pandemic, we can choose to turn to spirit and to take better care of ourselves instead.
While others may choose to descend into lack consciousness, greed or an attitude of entitlement, we can choose an attitude of gratitude, inner peace and joyful living instead.
We have a tremendous opportunity right now to expand our spiritual growth and to empower ourselves with self-care. Many folks don’t realize how useful taking just a few minutes out of their busy day can be!
Adopting a new daily spiritual practice, or simply reading an inspiring book, taking a soothing bath, or buying an aromatherapy diffuser can be uplift the spirit and heal the soul.
There is also crystal energy work, nature walks, prayer, and meditation by a body of water to enhance our joy and connect with the Creator who envisioned all this and brought it all into being.
What we can’t control, we can simply turn over to a Higher Power of our understanding. We can surrender to hope and joy, and let go of our fears. We can say, “This does not have to happen on my timeline, let Your will be done in my life.”
Who’s To Say If It’s Good, Or Bad?
Who’s to say if it’s good, or bad? There is a wise Buddhist children’s story I often read to my son that answers this question.
A young boy tells his father in a panicked, desperate tone, that his horse has gone missing. He is obviously very distraught and terrified he will never see his horse again.
The father says, “Who is to say that this situation is good, or bad?”
The son, of course, is confused. How could the loss of his horse not be a bad thing?
They go out into the woods to search for the horse. After many long days, they eventually find the horse. It has since made friends with a wild horse.
The father turns to the son and says, “See? Now you have two horses!”
But on the way back home the son stumbles and injures his leg. Again, he is miserable and terribly distraught. He tells his dad this is the worst possible thing that could happen. Now he will not be able to ride his horse.
His father says, “Who is to say that this situation is good, or bad?”
Of course, the son is perplexed and cannot figure out how injuring his leg could possibly be a good thing?
A week later, some of the son’s friends come to visit him. They tell him that they have been commanded to head out to war, along with all men over the age of 18. They tell the son he is lucky to have broken his leg, because now he would not be required to go to war with them.
Over the years, I have known many people, especially energy healing clients and Yoga students, who had suffered serious illness or injury…who later said it actually saved their lives, or brought them significant personal and spiritual growth, joy, fulfilment, and even bliss.
Find Your Calm In Crystals
It’s been a stressful couple of years for everyone, and stress-relief can be hard to accomplish. Stress, if untreated, can lead to a host of physical and emotional symptoms. But dealing with the stress of everyday life can be made easier with the right crystals in your spiritual practice.
When starting to work with these amazing crystals and stones, consider this: what causes stress in your life in the first place? Usually, it happens when we feel out of control and our energies aren’t properly centered and grounded. Earth-toned crystals such as smoke quartz (associated with the Earth element for stability) and tourmaline (release of negative energies) bring us to a baseline of positive energies to de-stress.
Soothing colored colors like blue (chrysocolla, aquamarine, lapis lazuli, larimar), violet (rhodonite, amethyst, tanzberry quartz, lepidolite), and white and grey (scolecite, howlite, agate) are traditionally associated with tranquillity and serenity. The cooler hues reflect the elements of water, or emotions, and air, our thoughts.
If you use some of these stress-relieving crystals in your meditations, imagine them help tame the runaway thoughts or feelings which cause so much turmoil. In the chakras, these are the Crown Chakra (thoughts) and Third Eye Chakra (emotions, psychic intuition), which are also represented by blues and purples.
Sometimes stress is less generalized and more related to one specific area in life. Which area is this for you? Knowing will help select the best crystal for your needs. If you’re overcome with panic attacks, amethyst (a well-known stress reliever) or blue sodalite (the Stone of Peace) are good choices.
Perhaps you’re having difficulty with communication at work or in a relationship, so blue lace agate (opening channels) or lapis lazuli (confidence) will work better for you. The possibilities for your crystals are endless: you might want to keep them with you in your pocket, in a necklace or bracelet, or create a special arrangement in your home or office.
The Transformative Power Of Silent Meditation
Spirituality is perceived in the East with many similarities to what is believed in the West, but with an entirely different way of talking about it. For example, in terms of Easter philosophy a person’s individual identity is not their ego.
Identity is the journey of self-discovery that consists of affirming one’s individuality and being able to express everything that we are. This can be achieved through meditation, prayer, or various other spiritual and recreational practices that clear the mind through engaging in an activity that soothes us and brings us into silent contemplation.
Silence does not detach us from our soul essence. On the contrary, it allows us to be fully present and completely ourselves, without the limitation of words and actions. It is not aimed at denying our true spiritual nature. On the contrary, it is a time of authentic self-awareness and beingness.
Different Buddhist traditions refer to the natural state of mind as a state of enlightenment. In the Sanskrit and Tibetan traditions, we also find terms that speak of a clear, open mind. In Tibetan philosophy, enlightenment or awakened energy is called byang-chubs – literally purity and wholeness.
Being calm, at ease, and silent constitutes a state of mind that would happen naturally unless something is bothering us. These internal obstacles cannot be blamed on others or our external reality. Life is always complex and rarely calm.
In fact, these obstructions are seen as being nothing but habits, the result of karma, that obstruct the free and unconditional luminosity of the mind, like clouds that cover the sun on a summer day. Karma does not mean punishment. It is the result of previous actions. They are the result of what we do and what happens to us.
Using Crystals To Reduce Stress And Anxiety
We all live with various amounts of stress in our daily life, and the last few years have been especially trying. But stress doesn’t have to be overwhelming for the spiritually conscious person. Apart from meditation and similar spiritual practices, an especially powerful ally can also be found in the use of various types of crystals. Whether you choose to keep them in your pocket, wear them as jewelry, or use them in your energy work, there is a crystal for everyone based on your own needs and affinities.
Among the most popular stones for crystal therapy and relieving stress is quartz. It’s easy to obtain and comes in different types. Clear quartz (what many people might think of when they visualize a crystal) offers clarity and vision when things seem muddled. Like a prism, it also brings out the hidden qualities of other crystals.
But quartz is also available in other colors to support us with life’s many challenges, such as rose (pink) to settle turbulent emotions and find solace when broken-hearted, and smoky (grey) to bolster our courage.
Another popular clear stone is citrine. As its name suggests, it is orange or yellow in color. Carrying a citrine stone is like having a drop of sunlight in your pocket; it wards off the gloom on even the worst ‘rainy,’ stressful day.
Blue agate (available in different shades) is useful when clearing up stress related to miscommunication. It is a recommended to keep one at the office or take it with you to school.
Almost as popular as quartz, amethyst (opaque purple) is a go-to if you tend to suffer from nervousness, anxiety, or panic attacks. It can be used while reciting mantras to invoke deeper serenity and calm.
Make Time To Listen To Your Heart
The heart is a wondrous place, the keeper of all your dreams, desires, hopes, and wishes. The heart is your protector and guide and the holder of your very own sacred flame.
No matter where we are in this life, or what role we have embraced as our life’s mission, we must always honor the calling of our heart. It’s built-in GPS will never lead us astray. The heart’s invitation is always one that guides us to our greatest purpose through the love of the Divine, love of life, love of self, love of others, and love of service.
There are times in life when the heart calls for us to make a sacrifice to bring to fruition a special dream or mission. But the fast-paced world we live in provides little time or space for the calmness necessary to hear the sometimes faint calling of the heart. This is why we must take time away from others to honor the commitment of the soul. It is as necessary as the medical student in the preparation for becoming a great surgeon.
For a tree to grow, a seed must first be planted, which requires retreating into the stillness of the forest or the garden, breaking the soil, and carefully nesting a seedling into the heart of mother earth. Similarly, to overcome the many distractions of our worlds, we must create the time and space to tune in to the song of our heart.
In doing so, we are honoring our heart, which requires consistent practice, beginning with baby steps. Over time, we can cultivate a spiritual practice of listening to the heart in much larger steps, and then bold, giant steps.
Mahatma Gandhi, the great activist, and humanitarian, once said that prayer, regardless of one’s religion or spiritual path, purifies the heart. Gandhi cultivated a deep stillness in his own life by making time to listen to his heart through the daily practice of meditation.