friendship
The Ghosts Of Regret
As part of my training as a spiritual life coach, our class was asked to do a profound exercise. Our task was to imagine ourselves on our deathbed someday, being visited by a gathering of ghosts. We had to imagine these ‘ghosts’ from our past as being very bitter and angry, because they represented all the things we never achieved or succeeded in, coming back to haunt us. They were the ghosts of our unfulfilled goals and dreams returning to die along with us.
We were asked to then review our life and imagine what we would say to ourselves and our ‘ghosts,’ now that our life is over. What would we advise ourselves to do if we could go back in time, get a second chance, and somehow live our life anew?
For me, this was a very thought-provoking process. The first thought for me was my personal ‘bucket list’ of things I still want to experience in this lifetime. For example, I still want to travel on the Orient Express train with my family; see the view from The Shard (a 72-storey skyscraper in London); fly down The Grand Canyon; and witness the splendor of Niagara Falls.
There are many things I still hope to also do. But why have I not done at least some of it yet? Too busy earning a living? Yes, we all get busy, and most of us need to work. However, does this mean we cannot also lead a fuller life?
The next thought the deathbed exercise brought up for me was a sad memory from a few years ago, when my late brother was receiving rehabilitation treatment at a local hospital. We were very close as siblings. He confided in me one day, while we sat looking out the hospital window and saw a young family walking by, that he often feels intense regret and sadness when he sees people with their kids and grandkids, while he had no offspring of his own.
An End-Of-Life Mediumship Experience
I have been doing mediumship work for over 40 years, but recently I received an unusual request I have never had before. I was asked to do a phone reading for a long-time client whose mom who was terminally ill and in hospice intensive care. My client said her mom could no longer speak, and she felt the need to communicate with her before she passed.
I have never done a mediumship reading under these circumstances, but I could hardly refuse my client’s plea. So, I agreed, despite not being entirely confident about how it would unfold.
As soon as I started to tune in, I saw a vision in my mind’s eye of a man holding both her mother’s hands. I described the physical appearance of the two people I was seeing, and the daughter then confirmed that it was definitely her mom and her mom’s brother.
The mother was very relieved to be able to reassure her daughter, as well as her life-long best friend, who was also present in the hospice room at the time, that she was finally ready to transition and return to her spiritual home.
Then I saw three angels standing behind the mother. They wanted to reassure those present that her crossing would be safe and easy, and that she would no longer be in so much pain.
When I perceive angels during readings, they appear to me exactly how one might expect them to look in the traditional Christian art sense, complete with wings and a glowing aura. However, I never see them with recognizable facial features and I always feel their presence first, before I see them.
Increase Your Power And Influence With Charisma
Charisma is a skill that can have a profound impact on our personal and professional lives. It is often wrongly assumed that charisma is a personality trait or talent that some people are born with. The truth is charisma is a learned behavior and skill that can be developed by anyone.
Charisma is the magnetic ability to attract, charm, and persuade others with our words and actions. The term originates from the Greek khárisma, which means ‘favor freely given,’ or ‘gift of grace,’ because the ancients believed that possessing this quality was a divine gift bestowed only upon those who were favored by the gods.
It is generally associated with people who are confident, engaging, and influential. By cultivating charisma, we become more effective at reaching and connecting with others, which can be invaluable in life.
Whether we are seeking to build stronger, healthier personal relationships, foster better professional connections, or make more friends, having a strong presence and the ability to engage with others is a key factor for success. Charisma is not about being arrogant, manipulative, or insincere. Rather it is about being authentic and genuine, while also being able to express ourselves in a way that resonates with others.
Charismatic people are skilled communicators who are able to listen actively, empathize with others, and express themselves clearly and persuasively. They are also able to project confidence, enthusiasm, and positivity, which can be infectious and uplifting to those around them.
How To Stay Focused On Your Goals
Staying focused on our personal goals can be challenging in today’s fast-paced world. With constant demands on our time and energy, including many distractions and obstacles, it is easy to lose sight of our dreams and become overwhelmed. Commitments to employers, family, friends, and community sometimes leave us little time to reflect on how changing our lives can serve our highest good. The answer to this is to cultivate the right mindset and lifestyle strategies.
To begin with it is possible to remain focused and achieve success by developing a positive mindset. Positive thoughts and self-empowering beliefs build our mental resilience and help us overcome challenges more easily. It’s also beneficial to cultivate a growth mindset that enables us to view challenges as opportunities for growth and learning, rather than setbacks.
Another critical aspect of remaining focused on our personal goals is having a clear vision of what we want to achieve. Taking the time to set goals that are specific, achievable and measurable creates a clear roadmap for success and staying on track. It’s also essential to break larger goals into smaller, more manageable tasks, which can help us stay motivated and focused.
Most of all it is vital to prioritize both spiritual and personal self-care. Just taking a few minutes daily to realign and renew our energy can reduce stress, improve health and vitality, and enhance our ability to think creatively. Taking care of our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs can help us stay grounded and focused, even in the face of personal challenges. Make some time for regular exercise, prayer, meditation, journaling, outdoor recreation, or whatever endeavor is a source of joy and renewal for you.
Stop Surviving And Start Living
The past three years, I have heard many people say they’re living in ‘survival mode.’ For some it has been about health and personal safety, for others it was isolation and loneliness, or bereavement and grief, or loss of employment and financial security.
It has certainly been an unprecedented, challenging time for our generation. And at times it has indeed been an actual fight for survival, which many tragically did not survive. Many families are still grieving the loss of their loved ones.
Sadly, for some it has also been a time of fearing many things that never happened. It has also been a time that revealed how some folks may be in need of a major ‘privilege check.’ For example, I personally know people who were excessively anxious during the quarantine lockdowns because they were eating too much and gaining weight, or were upset because they could not go to the salon or spa, while there are people in the world who were not even able to feed their families, or worse, had nowhere safe to take shelter.
The global pandemic has indeed been a unique opportunity to reflect on our beliefs, values, and what truly matters to us. Not everyone made the most of this prospect. It seems for some it is still difficult to move beyond the self-defeating mindset of ‘it’s a struggle to survive.’
Yes, life is sometimes definitely hard for all of us. The past three years proved that once again on a global scale. Life can throw major curve balls our way and we all handle things through our personal lens on the world. Some of us are more resilient than others; and some of us more privileged than others. Being in ‘survival mode’ is therefore relative to the individual.
We Need To Reopen Our Hearts
If, like me, you are highly sensitive to energies, I am sure you have noticed the alarming increase in anger, hatred, callousness, and cruelty in our society in recent times. It seems many people’s hearts have hardened. In my view, this is due to a post-pandemic heart chakra problem in our culture.
For example, one issue I have been finding more of in post-pandemic readings is an inability for many of my callers to remain ‘in the flow’ with their romantic partners. Some of my clients are either overly focused on, and extremely loyal to a partner who clearly doesn’t deserve it, or they are too rigid in keeping their distance and even avoiding contact. I have also been noticing more of this with people’s friendships and interactions with their relatives.
Of course, we must set healthy boundaries in all our relationships for the sake of our own well-being. Without proper boundaries we will become too exhausted and energetically drained to be of any use to others. By taking good care of ourselves, we also take better care of others and will have more to give.
But there’s a difference between healthy boundaries and ‘excommunicating’ just about everyone across-the-board. ‘Blocking,’ ‘banning,’ and ‘ghosting’ every person who dares to express a different point of view on social media, and disowning every person in your life who has the nerve to do or say the slightest thing that may annoy you, is not exactly setting healthy boundaries. It is rather a sign of having very weak, fickle boundaries. If this has become your way of being in the world, then you may want to consider doing some heart chakra energy work.
Never Allow Regret To Hold You Back
Recently, I attended a celebration of life gathering held in memory of a friend who died under tragic circumstances. He was an incredible energy healer, and also exquisitely crafted Native American flutes and drums. We had been friends for decades, but over the years we saw less and less of each other. The relationship between us was, however, a matter of ‘out of sight, out of mind.’
Our individual schedules were such that life eventually got in the way. There was however an unmistakable mutual respect and heart-centered connection between us facilitated by Spirit whenever we did meet. We would offer each other guidance, support, and fresh perspectives in those special moments.
My friend and his wife met about two decades ago at a spiritual event and eventually became an incredible spiritual team. Before they met, I remember his future wife asking me to swap readings with her.
“Sure, why not?” I said, although I was actually quite nervous and still new to doing readings on a ‘professional basis.’
When I read for her, the information that came through included various confirmations regarding her spiritual work, including her music, becoming an author, teaching, and her increased spirit connection. Last, but not least, there was also the indication of a potential romantic relationship, including a timeframe for approximately when this might unfold. Soon after, the two of them met. Over the years, it was great to see their relationship blossom and thrive. They truly became partners in life, love, and business.