Empath
The Empath’s Guide To Toxic Friendships
Our friends are a beautiful and enriching part of our lives. In some cases, they even become our chosen family through the bonds of mutual caring and shared life experiences.
Healthy friendships are built on a foundation of balance. They’re marked by mutual support, trust, loyalty, acceptance, and honesty, all with a touch of compassion. But for the empath or highly sensitive person, friendships can sometimes be a bit of a rollercoaster.
We might feel like we’re always giving and giving, and sometimes we might even feel drained. It can be hard to know when to draw the line with someone who might be taking advantage of our energy.
Friendships can be so many different things, and it’s important to remember that not all of them are the same. They range from casual acquaintances to deep, intimate bonds we form with those we call our “besties.”
It’s so important to have a close friend you can trust with your most private fears, dreams, and vulnerabilities. But, sadly, this isn’t always the reality. If you’re the kind of person who is sensitive to the feelings of others, you know how hard it can be when you’re betrayed or disappointed by someone close to you. It can feel like the saying “keep your enemies close” is true in these situations.
Some of us are more outgoing and have a large social circle, while others are more introverted and have a small social circle. Empaths can fall into either category. Regardless of which category an empath falls into, it is wise for us to exercise discernment.
Protect Your Energy From Toxic People
If you’ve ever felt emotionally drained, manipulated, or physically unwell after spending time with someone, know that you’re not alone. I do relationship readings for people stuck in toxic relationships, or dealing with energy vampires in their family or workplace, on a daily basis.
These relationships and people feed off your energy, often leaving you feeling depleted, anxious, or confused.
Why do so many people allow these people into their lives? Often, they simply have no choice. These toxic people may be family members, coworkers, in-laws, friends we’ve known for years, other relatives, or even life partners.
As a deeply empathic person myself, I understand the profound sensitivity that comes with feeling the energies around you.
Being surrounded by energy thieves can feel like standing in front of an emotional vacuum or caught inside a whirlwind of chaos. If you don’t prepare yourself energetically and spiritually before engaging with these types of individuals, your emotional and physical well-being will suffer.
It’s exhausting trying to maintain your peace in the presence of drama, manipulation, or constant criticism. Take for example family gatherings or in-law visits.
These moments can trigger a cascade of emotions due to clashing personalities, judgment, gossip, and unresolved history. It often feels like nothing you do is ever right, and it becomes a true test of inner strength.
Tell-Tale Signs You Are Being Gaslighted
You’re crazy, that never happened. Don’t be so sensitive. I’ve never had this problem with anyone else but you. It was never my idea, it was yours! Come on, you’re imagining things. Everyone else agrees, except you. You’re just making things up.
These are just some of the things you might hear when someone is gaslighting you. It usually happens whenever you confront them about their bad behavior, only to have your reality twisted in return…in ways that can really make your head spin!
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse that most often shows up in toxic romantic relationships, but it can also manifest in dynamics with friends, coworkers, employers, family members, and even neighbors and landlords.
At its core, gaslighting is the manipulation of your sense of reality, leaving you confused, anxious, and doubting yourself and your own perceptions. Sometimes it’s very obvious and unmistakable. Other times, it happens so subtly you may not even realize you’re being manipulated.
The term “gaslighting” comes from the 1938 stage play Gas Light, which was later made into the 1944 film of the same name.
In the story, a husband tricks his wealthy wife into thinking she’s going crazy by making small changes to their surroundings, like dimming the gas lights, and then denying that anything has changed. His goal is to make her doubt her own sanity, so he could have her committed to a mental institution and gain control of her inheritance.
My Childhood Psychic Awakening
Being gifted from an early age, I had lots of questions, and wanted specific, detailed answers about psychic phenomena, spirituality and the mystical. This later became my norm to everything, and the world around me. The why’s and how’s continue to fascinate me in every aspect of my life.
My spirit guides have been very helpful over the years, as I found that humans can seldom answer my questions clearly, nor adequately. Over the years, my guides provided me with the stepping stones for my personal psychic development.
My guides assured me early on that they would never give me more than I could handle. They also made it clear that the truth of anything can always be confirmed by simply asking. I believed them, and each time I had an unusual sense or feeling, I asked for confirmation. I still do.
My first paranormal encounters and psychic experiences were with the animals. Their energy and communication is easier to understand, just like my guides, and they always communicate with unconditional love.
This also led to a special bond with nature, and especially the trees. Soon after came the wind, and the water, their sounds so soothing and calm. As a child, I always experienced a deep, tranquil feeling of well-being, serenity and inner peace whenever I was outside in nature. I still do.
My next extra-sensory experiences were of premonitions and forebodings concerning the safety and well-being of others. At such a young age these presentiments were tricky to relay to adults.
Honoring Yourself In Difficult Family Relationships
Family dynamics can be tremendously complex for many of us. These relationships are multilayered and deeply ingrained, often playing out across generations.
Many of my clients seek psychic insight about family matters. After matters of love and romance, and then business or career, family is often the most emotionally charged subject.
In readings, especially with empaths, intuitives, and highly sensitive individuals, I hear countless stories of family pain. Many carry a sense of never belonging, of being misunderstood or scapegoated.
These emotional burdens are often the heaviest that people bear because they are tied to the people they loved first and still love, despite the hurt.
When control or finances are interwoven into the family structure, the complexity of these relationships multiplies.
For many, family represents a love-hate relationship or a deep bond that carries deep wounds. While we cannot choose our family, we do have a say in how we interact with them, how we respond, and whether we continue to engage.
Severing family ties is a significant and often heartbreaking decision that is never taken lightly. By the time someone considers taking this step, the drama or emotional abuse has often been ongoing for decades and is sometimes rooted in a vividly painful childhood.
The Sublime Joy Of Solitary Bliss
There’s something truly magical about solitude. I’m not talking about loneliness or feeling isolated. I’m talking about that golden, nourishing moments of ‘me-time’ when you can just be alone in peace with yourself — and only yourself.
For me, taking time out from the noise and chaos is not just a preference. It’s a sacred necessity. I mostly like to do things on my own, at my own pace, without interruption. Whether I’m meditating, walking in nature, or simply brewing a cup of tea, being alone allows my heart, mind and soul to breathe!
Some people thrive in the company of others. They feel alive in the presence of connection and togetherness. And I respect that. We all walk different paths, and what nourishes one soul may not nourish another in the same way.
But for those of us who find peace in solitude, the inner sanctuary is a silent temple — where we commune with the divine, reconnect with our essence, and return to the world feeling centered and whole.
Solitude is not just a lifestyle choice for me — it’s the grounding force that supports everything else in my life.
When I am peacefully alone, I can focus better, think more clearly, and become truly aligned. My energy is mine. My time is mine. My thoughts are mine. There’s no need to filter, explain, or adjust to anyone else’s expectations. It’s just me, myself and the universe — and in that space I feel centered and complete.
Cutting The Toxic Cords That Bind Us
In every relationship – romantic, platonic, professional – there is a metaphysical cord of attachment that exhanges energy from one person to the other.
These energy cords can be thought of as WiFi signals, electrical circuits, or even surgical tubes that transfer mental, emotional, and spiritual energies between individuals. They are the invisible ties of love that keep us connected to our loved ones.
I remember reading an article years ago about the intense grief of famous American singer Dean Martin after the tragic death of his eldest son. His boy was a fighter pilot in the California Air National Guard and lost his life in a plane crash during a training flight in 1987.
Martin described the loss as feeling as if his “heart had been ripped out.” This vivid description is a testament to the reality of these ties that bind us. The intense pain the singer felt was essentially his heart chakra feeling ‘broken.’ The loss had a profound impact on the remainder of his life and career.
The concept of these cords may seem abstract, but their effects are very tangible. They are not just symbolic; they are very real and have a profound effect on our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being on a daily basis.
When we engage in any kind of relationship with someone, these energetic cords extend from our chakras, or energy centers, to those of the other person. While these soul-to-soul cords feed us with all the good energies that come from being connected to others, such as love, nurturing, and belonging, they can also have the opposite effect.