trust
The Romantic Challenges Of Being An Empath
I frequently do readings for clients who are discovering their empathic abilities, as well as awakened empaths who are still working on their self-empowerment. The majority of empaths that I have worked with over the years have all been in very high-stress romantic situations that do nothing but magnify what these highly sensitive people are already experiencing. While this is no doubt confusing, frightening and intense for the empath, one must consider the fact that it also greatly impacts their partners.
An empath a highly sensitive person who is very aware of the feelings, moods and motivations of other people and are deeply affected by the energies around them. This is experienced by the empath in many ways, including as physical sensations, moods, and emotions, as well as an inner knowing of what lies beneath the surface of other people’s words and actions. An empath has the ‘psychic radar’ to hone in intuitively on the truth of a person or situation.
Relationships, especially romantic ones, can therefore be a nightmare for empaths, and their partners. While their partner may be saying one thing, the empath ‘knows’ or ‘feels’ something different, and can sense if their partner is being dishonest or deceitful. While this can be useful at times to protect the empath from pursuing relationships with the wrong kind of person, it can also be very damaging and destructive to a potentially happy, healthy relationship with loving partner.
It can be very disconcerting and intimidating for the romantic partner of an empath to feel so constantly questioned, judged and exposed. I get many calls from empaths who are deep in an argument stemming from their partner’s refusal to come clean about what is really going on, or what they are truly feeling. The more the partner protests, the more the empath pushes and prods, leading the partner to shut down, withdraw, or disconnect completely.
Don’t Walk On Eggshells Anymore!
Do you often find yourself around people that make you feel like you have to monitor every single thing you say, for fear you may be hurting their feelings? Do you constantly have to be cautious and guarded around certain people in your life, because they internalize everything you say? It really is like walking on eggshells!
I used to have a friend like that. At first I complied, but then one day I decided to start talking like I would normally talk to my other friends. I wanted to see what effect it would have on this person. Well, it actually helped in the end, as it soon made her see how silly she was being. In fact, she even confessed to how she felt bad for reacting as if the entire world revolved around her and her feelings. It turned out to be a meaningful opportunity for her personal growth.
Also, have you ever known anyone whom you shared some inner most concern or anxiety with, and they act like you are making a mountain out of a molehill? You trusted them by sharing your inner most fear or heartache, and they react like it is nothing or you are just being silly. They may even turn around and act as if what you are saying is just plain wrong, or irrelevant! As a highly sensitive person I have experienced this many times in my life and it’s no fun, trust me. And if you’re like me, you just stop talking to this person all together about anything that may deeply matter to you.
These interpersonal experiences can be frustrating and hurtful, but also very valuable to learn from. As soon as this kind of interaction happens with someone, it is useful to reflect on whom you can really trust and have faith in, and who not. If you become more aware of whom you surround yourself with, more people will come into your life that will truly hear you and really have compassion and a deep understanding of what you’re trying to impart. They will also be willing and able to give great advice and be a great sounding board for you, without being egotistical or simply uncaring!
Plucking An Eyelash Changes The Universe
The decisions you make today will decide the outcome of your life tomorrow. No matter how small or big these decisions may seem to be.
We have all been in those situations where we had to make an important decision. Should I leave, or should I stay? Should I pursue a new relationship, or should I stick with the one I am currently in? Is all this effort really worth it? One of the most difficult things you will ever have to do is make that all-important life changing decision.
When my grandpa was in the hospital, we had to make the tough decision to either turn off his life support or keep him alive and let him keep on taking morphine. We made the decision to let him go. Fortunately, he made it easy for us to decide, because it was his wish in life that it should be done, if ever it had to come to that.
Afterwards he did come to me in spirit and shared that he was grateful we did it after all. I knew we had made the right choice, but it was still nice getting that confirmation from him directly.
But such are not the only challenging decisions we face in life. I deal with people every day who face difficult choices or are at a crossroads in life. Sometimes they face what may appear to be a simple decision, but it is not. They ask me things like, “Should I go with this new guy, who contacted me on Facebook, or should I work things out with my marriage of 25 years?”
I always tell people to let their intuition be their guide. I get a lot of people, women mostly, asking me how do they know to trust there intuition; how do they know it is guiding them in the right direction? I tell them to spend some time just being quiet, and to really meditate and feel what their Higher Self is telling them to do.
New Beliefs To Live Your Best Life
The stress and challenges of late and the negative energies in our world in recent times have brought many of us to a point of feeling anxious, frustrated, worried and confused. Some people have even become fearful of leaving their homes. But the time has come to move beyond the negativity and fear and start living our best life again.
Fear is powerful. Fear can keep us trapped in a mental prison of our own making and can prevent us from moving forward. More often than not our worst fears are unfounded and not based in reality or truth.
Belief is also powerful. Beliefs can be negative or positive, true or false. Beliefs originate from within and, again, it is up to each of us to decide if our beliefs are true, or if merely keeps us stuck.
Look deeply at your fears and beliefs. Consider all the fears and beliefs that you sense may be holding you back. Make a list and leave some spaces between each line. When you are done, carefully review your list. Read each line carefully. Once you have done this, think of a truth or positive belief to counteract each of the items on your list and write it underneath each one. Now read the new list out loud to yourself. For example:
False belief: I have no money to do anything.
Counter belief: I do have some money. I have food on my table, a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and I a few extra nickels in my wallet. I do have money to do things. And if I set my mind to it, I can earn some more money.
It is that simple to come up with new beliefs. However, the difficult part is programming each positive statement in your psyche. Therefore, it is important to keep it simple, realistic and truthful.
For example, ‘having a few nickels’ is a simple truth that counters the false belief that you ‘have no money.’ it is simply not true that you have no money. You do have a few extra nickels…and that is indeed money. In other words, you have now erased the lie that you believed and changed it to the truth that is. That is the simplicity of this exercise.
The Transformative Power Of The Moon
Does your energy change for better or worse when there is a Full Moon? Every person has some notion of what a Full Moon means to them.
When the Moon is full, it has an energy pull and charging capability that is unlike the new or quarter moons. During a Full Moon, I usually find it difficult to sleep – no matter how hard I try. The energetic pull is powerful. This is when my mind is most active.
A Full Moon is in fact the best time to open yourself to receive healing or spirit messages, to recharge your energy, or set intentions for manifestation to transform your life for the better. Crystals can also be put out under the Full Moon to charge them up and bring new life to them.
The Full Moon is a time to breathe in the good, release what does not serve you, and allow the Moon’s energy to take lighten your worries and lessen your burdens. A simple clearing ceremony becomes ‘super-charged’ under a Full Moon. Write down what does not serve you: your hurts, your disappointments, your anger and so on. Then burn this list outside, under the Full Moon, while asking the Universe, Source, God, Spirit, the Divine to cleanse the energy from your being.
I live close to a lake and when the Moon is full, no matter what time of year, it reflects off the lake in its various hues and colors. I always take a walk to the lake to allow this energy to feed my soul. It uplifts my spirit and makes me smile. Gazing at the beauty of the Full Moon brings new energy to you if you do it properly.
The next time there is a Full Moon, venture outdoors, look up and contemplate her beauty and power. Ask yourself, how do you feel standing there under the Full Moon? Ask yourself what you want to accomplish or change in your life? You need not do anything further. The manifesting and healing powers of the Moon will carry your intentions forward.
Trusting Your Inner Truth
Who in your life would you define as someone you could completely and totally trust? A parent, your spouse or partner, best friend, or a co-worker? Do you rely instead on the support of your angels, spirit guides or loved ones that have passed on? If you have someone you feel you can unconditionally rely on, be it in this life of the next, consider yourself blessed and fortunate.
However, if you struggle to trust anyone or anything, there is one source you can always trust if you allow yourself to be open to it. In fact, if you accomplish this you never have to rely on any external sources, both secular and spiritual.
This one true source is your inner guidance, your inner voice, your intuition, your soul wisdom. When we become more aware of our inner guidance we can discern for ourselves when there is a ‘twinge’ or a ‘gut feeling’ that we are being presented with a truth. If you are in alignment with what truly resonates within, it creates a strong bond with your higher self that ultimately places you in a position of complete self-trust.
To achieve this we need a strong personal belief system. Our belief or faith must be such that we are able to accept without question that we have an inherent ability to discern complete truth. We must have total faith in our own inner guidance and embrace our spiritual wisdom within.
If we do not believe and do not honor the inner wisdom that exists in all of us, we need to ask ourselves why not? What can we possibly find in the external world or in others that is more reliable than our own inner voice? Why might we trust what is outside ourselves more than what resides within.
Successful Relationships Begin With Self-Love
How do you ensure your relationship will work long-term? Many callers ask me this question almost every day. In my experience, there needs to be a balance of love, caring, respect and truth for any relationship to last. If you do not have these components in a relationship, more than likely it will not work out. If a relationship is out of balance, then it usually is too one-sided and not serving your highest good.
The key first step is to love and respect yourself, because when you love and respect yourself, you will also receive more love and respect from others. There is not much of a future for any relationship that is based on the self-sacrifice of one party. It never lasts and typically does not end well. Balance is required in matters of the heart.
Along with the respect you deserve in the way you are treated. it is loving, caring, and respectful? This is applicable to everyone in your life, including romantic partners, friends, co-workers, family, and relatives.
Respect is not only something we must demand, but we must also set boundaries for it in our daily life. When a boundary is repeatedly disregarded or violated by someone in your life, then something needs to change. This is when you have to say, enough.
Sometimes the hard decisions need to be made. If someone is not respecting you in your relationship, treating you poorly, and not meeting your most essential wants and needs, then it is time to make a change. Respect yourself enough to end it.
Too many people do not believe they deserve love and respect, for various reasons. The problem often begins in childhood. It is important to realize you do and to start loving yourself a little more – not in an egotistical way, but in a way that you love and respect yourself enough to want only the best for you and to no longer settle for anything less.