balance
Blessed Are The Kind And Helpful
September is Virgo season! What better time to consider becoming a better person by being more compassionate and supportive to others in need? Virgos are known for being helpful, kind, sympathetic, and someone others can lean on.
Virgo happens to be my Sun sign, so I have a bias here. But seriously, nothing is more rewarding than to be of service. Nothing blesses us more than helping to make the world a better place.
We owe it to ourselves and others to be of service. Because once we are truly there for others, we soon begin to notice undeserved joys and blessings filling our wellspring of abundance every day.
When we are kind, helpful and of service to others we begin to draw more beneficial energy to us, and lose track of the need to count money at the table as it comes in. Work is simply fun! Others see our joy and inspire towards similar goals in their own lives.
Those who are unkind or disregard the needs of others, even treating others as their emotional punching bags, eventually have a heavy karmic duty to repay. Being selfish, narcissistic, and cruel are the sources of much misery, anxiety and self-destructive, addictive behaviors in many people’s lives. It simply does not pay to be callous and uncharitable.
Of course, we all have our self-absorbed ‘bad days,’ because none of us are perfect. But we do an inventory at the end of the day, reflecting on how our conduct may have made others feel.
Create a sacred space in your home where you may atone for your missteps; peaceful area where you may recite a daily intention for grace. Equip this space with an essential oil diffuser or incense burner, candles, crystals and gemstones, oracle cards or runes, prayer beads, singing bowls, personal mementos, photos of loved ones, artwork, and other symbolic items.
Balance, Flow And Your Perception
So much of our lives seems to be about balance. We spend so much time and energy trying to become more balanced. We are taught that if we balance our life things will be easier. If we are balanced we will be more in tune with nature. Balance your checkbook. Balance your weight. Balance your spiritual life and lifestyle. So many people feel as though they have failed themselves by never achieving this balance.
Well, maybe we are going about it all wrong. There was a time when I believed all things in this universe were balanced. But, when you really stop to think about it. Nothing in this universe is balanced. It is continually flowing.
If we think about our solar system. It isn’t balanced at all. It continuously flows. The planets move in a procession through space. Harmonizing gracefully with one another. Rivers flow. Water flows. Our bodies, comprised mostly of water, flow. The blood in our veins, flows.
Our minds are never still, our thoughts are constantly flowing. Glass, may appear to be solid, but in reality, it is forever flowing. Look at a piece of glass that has been in the same position for 75 or 100 years. The bottom is thicker and the top is thinner. As, gravity has pulled it. It has flowed.
So, again maybe we can learn something from nature. Instead of trying to balance everything, which by the way is impossible. Maybe, we should focus more on finding ways to flow harmoniously through our life. If we are forever trying to do the impossible, we are forever defeated. The world isn’t going to stop and allow us to balance it. So, instead of working against it, we should figure out where we fit into it, and just go with it.
If you don’t know where you fit in the bigger scheme of things, look at it like this: the universe and nature aren’t concerned with the material things. And, maybe we shouldn’t be so consumed by them either. Maybe we should step away from our computers, television sets and phones and try to learn a little bit more about who we really are, as well as about each other.
Empaths Need Firm Psychosocial Boundaries
Psychosocial balance is tricky for the empath. It requires managing expectations, checking our reactions and emotions, and most especially setting boundaries. Because it is so easy for us to link into the feelings and emotions of those around us, empaths often forget that others may not respond in kind.
For the empath it’s all about balancing your intuitive gifts with your expectations, and finally your responses. Work, friendships, relationships, all the things that encompass our daily lives, require vigilance to ensure that balance is maintained, or chaos will ensue.
For the Type A empath, jobs, friendships and relationships can end very abruptly with major repercussions. The more assertive empath tends to have the motto of “do unto others before they do unto you.” They will leave a job, a relationship or a friendship at the drop of a hat. The more subdued, timid empath tends to stay in miserable job situations, one-sided friendships, and sometimes downright abusive intimate relationships.
At work especially it is very important for all empaths to remember that there is almost always going to be some personality clashes. Others do not always view us favorably. Remember that you are there to do a job – your job. Staying focused on your work, the requirements of that job and your performance is your primary responsibility. Confronting someone, especially a superior, with “what’s your problem, I know you don’t like me” is counterproductive. Similarly the typical response of the introverted empath to quit, or at least never address any issues, is also futile.
Yes, it can be gut-wrenching or infuriating for empaths to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a co-worker or boss doesn’t care for them, or has it out for them, but utilize your gift! As an empath you can read the feelings and intentions of others. This gives you a map to the personalities you are dealing with. Use that information to moderate your own responses to the situation and the individuals you are dealing with in your professional environment.
The Feminine Power Of The Sacral Chakra
During the recent Mercury retrograde, I lost my apartment keys. In a moment of wanderlust, my keys had slipped out of my pocket during an outing.
It happened on a Sunday, and it was a holiday weekend to boot. The office at my apartment complex wouldn’t open until the Tuesday. So, I was either stuck in my home for two more days, or I could impart creative solutions.
I chose to do the latter.
My daughter stays with me some days of the week, as well as every other weekend. The other days she is with my ex-husband. I asked if he could drop her off a day early, so I could go out and buy groceries while she was here. Then she could buzz me back into the apartment.
When we face problems, a key ingredient in navigating solutions is creativity. This is partly supported by the sacral chakra that inspires us past challenging, endless obstacles.
Communicated by the throat chakra, the other creative center in the system, the sacral center radiates joy when a solution appears.
The sacral chakra is one of the three feminine energy centers of power, along with the heart chakra and third eye. If all three are balanced in the female body, she attracts abundance in love, financial matters, and friendships with ease. Her solutions are naturally inspired by love emanating from her being. Nothing is expected in return. Those who have benefitted from her help give back to her out of gratitude. Continue reading
Choose To Contribute, Even In Difficult Circumstances
Over the recent Easter holidays, spirit has once again been making me aware of the dire need for gratitude and generosity in our world. Spirit asks us to reflect on those less fortunate who live in war-torn countries where they must survive daily atrocities.
Also, we must think of families closer to home who, due to illness or work issues, don’t have enough to live in appropriate housing, or even know where their next meal is coming from. It is our spiritual duty to volunteer or donate to charities to help those currently living in adverse circumstances.
It is also important to give thanks for what we have, even if we are currently hoping for so much more in the future. Irrespective of our current circumstances, we can still radiate kindness and generosity. We can give our time to help others or just listen to someone in need of a confidant.
Meanwhile, regardless of where we stand right now, we can continue to visualize the outcomes we are expecting, for just a few quiet minutes per day. Remember to set achievable goals and give yourself a timeline to follow.
Stay focused. Stay committed. Stay strong. Lead by example. Smile and act as if your gifts have already arrived. Be excited by the small accomplishments and the little wins as you aim higher and stronger.
We all face challenges in life, and sometimes they can seem insurmountable. Instead of giving in to fear and worry, focus on something that makes you happy or someone who lights up your life. Stay the course and maintain balance as much as possible, while you work through those challenges.
When it comes to conversations and relationships, remember that we either contribute or contaminate with every interaction. Make the effort to choose to contribute, even in difficult circumstances. Solve disagreements without resorting to posturing and name-calling.
Keeping Score In A Relationship
I believe the habit of keeping a ‘score card’ might start in someone’s childhood. It is based on developing a certain sense of duty and responsibility early on. For example, as kids I remember my sister and I had to take turns doing the dishes. My sister would always keep tabs on that chore. She always knew whose turn it was next. My sister is four years older than me, and to this day she still keeps score on almost everything in her life.
This also set the precedent for me with friends and other family members. Others keeping score just seems natural to me, so I never feel the need to do so myself.
This did not server me well in all aspects of my young adult life. For example, in relationships it always felt like I was the one trying to make things work. It did not make any difference to me who called who last. Therefore, I ended up doing most of the calling. But does it truly matter that much?
What has the other person done for me? After all I have done and given so much! What do I get out of this relationship? These are the questions score keepers are always asking themselves.
But in my view, a relationship is never 50/50, even if both people are truly happy and fulfilled. One will always be doing less or more. But it does not matter, as true love is supposed to be unconditional.
So, if you are keeping a score card things will never balance and the emotion that will come up is anger, rebellion, defensiveness, or a complete shut-down. That does not serve any relationship in the long run.
Successful Relationships Begin With Self-Love
How do you ensure your relationship will work long-term? Many callers ask me this question almost every day. In my experience, there needs to be a balance of love, caring, respect and truth for any relationship to last. If you do not have these components in a relationship, more than likely it will not work out. If a relationship is out of balance, then it usually is too one-sided and not serving your highest good.
The key first step is to love and respect yourself, because when you love and respect yourself, you will also receive more love and respect from others. There is not much of a future for any relationship that is based on the self-sacrifice of one party. It never lasts and typically does not end well. Balance is required in matters of the heart.
Along with the respect you deserve in the way you are treated. it is loving, caring, and respectful? This is applicable to everyone in your life, including romantic partners, friends, co-workers, family, and relatives.
Respect is not only something we must demand, but we must also set boundaries for it in our daily life. When a boundary is repeatedly disregarded or violated by someone in your life, then something needs to change. This is when you have to say, enough.
Sometimes the hard decisions need to be made. If someone is not respecting you in your relationship, treating you poorly, and not meeting your most essential wants and needs, then it is time to make a change. Respect yourself enough to end it.
Too many people do not believe they deserve love and respect, for various reasons. The problem often begins in childhood. It is important to realize you do and to start loving yourself a little more – not in an egotistical way, but in a way that you love and respect yourself enough to want only the best for you and to no longer settle for anything less.