self-empowerment
Showing Up When Spirit Calls
Many years ago, while working in a clinical practice, I was called to lead a group of women who were survivors of domestic abuse. At that time, my role within the organization was strictly administrative. I had no clinical experience and quite frankly had serious misgivings about how well these women would be served through our agency’s poorly-funded, piecemeal program with severe limitations.
As we were on the verge of losing our contract altogether, the executive director burst into my office one morning and announced that I would be the interim director of the domestic violence program, in order to save the contract. I sat motionless, with a look of deep concern on my face.
Before I could respond verbally, my executive director began reviewing a county contract that outlined the qualifications of the new program director. As she flipped through the pages of the lengthy contract, my hope was that somewhere in bold writing there might be a job description that required a clinical background in Psychology or Social Work, but this was not the case.
I recall that same day reaching out to my dear friend and confidant, a fellow psychic and spiritual counselor who always helped me find clarity, especially when I felt completely lost in a situation. While my friend’s words were comforting and reassuring, she also shocked me out of my comfort zone. I wanted to hear from her an easy way to get out of my new job assignment, but she announced that I had a calling to help a group of women whose lives desperately needed to be changed.
The Transformative Power Of Gratitude
The act of giving thanks is a transformative one. When we live in gratitude, our energy vibration becomes elevated, and this positivity spreads outward like the ripples in water. If you’ve ever heard of paying it forward, this is the same idea! Gratitude changes lives – both our own and that of others.
Being appreciative and giving thanks to others, to the Universe, to the Earth for its sustenance, raises positive energies which will in turn come back to us.
Sometimes being grateful can feel like a chore, or something we need to pretend feeling. Every one of us experiences hardship and adversity. Life’s challenges sometimes get even the most grateful people down. The best way to flip that into something positive is to make a list of gratitude statements, in your mind, aloud, or in your journal.
Are you grateful for your friends, family, your health, the beauty of nature? Maybe you’re simply thankful you were able to get up this morning, when many other people were not.
Make this process one from the heart. Feel the positive energy. After a while, it will become an uplifting habit, and your body and mind will start to enjoy the positive rush of feelings. Let this routine be the first thing you do in the morning, and the last one you do at night before sleep.
Take Back Your Power!
Everyone has a story to tell about their love life. And some of have extremely abusive stories to tell. One common element that I have come across frequently in my work, is the fact that some people are treated with disrespect and emotional abuse, and yet they are still patiently waiting for the abuser to return to them!
When you ask them why, it is usually because they “still love” that person. Well, that is not love. It is simply an imagined need that has been created by the abuser, or by one’s lack of self-worth. It is a psychological illusion, not real.
If you are still waiting for someone to come back into your life, after they left you for someone else, you are making yourself the second choice. You are degrading your own true value and taking away from your self-worth.
During a workshop I presented on this subject, I asked the participants to write down why they felt they needed that other person in their life. In essence, all their responses ended up being about lack of self-esteem, self-respect and self-security.
The next step was to ask them how they would you feel if they saw someone treating their daughter, or son, in the same way they have been allowing the abusive partner to treat them? They all said they wouldn’t tolerate it. They would intervene and get that person out of their lives, or at least try. One of the delegates even went as far as to say, “I would lock her in the house and never let her out again.” Which might be a great idea under the circumstances, but obviously not realistic!
Guidelines For Spiritual Growth
Spirituality is a wide-ranging concept with many diverse perspectives. In essence it is the process through which our inner being seeks to relate to something bigger than ourselves. It is the search for the meaning and purpose of our human existence. Spirituality is about our soul or spirit, and the unseen realms, as opposed to material things and physical life. It is also the life-long pursuit of inner peace, unconditional love, and existential wisdom and understanding.
Many people believe that the secret to spiritual growth and development can only be found in a book, a lecture, dogmatic belief system, or some other product or service that will magically unlock the doors to spiritual insight, happiness, joy and fulfillment. However, spirituality is a unique, personal path that each of us can explore on our own, from within. The following guidelines may be helpful on your journey towards spiritual fulfillment.
Reflection
The first step in personal spiritual growth is reflecting on your life journey. To be spiritual is to be questioning and inquisitive. Spiritual growth is a process of constantly learning and improving. One must be willing to open yourself to personal and spiritual growth, and by doing this your world opens up and things become less scary.
Holding on to past events keeps us from experiencing new adventures, and the emotional baggage will only weigh you down. Accept your past mistakes and learn from them. Reflect on what changes need to happen for you to move forward.
We are all teachers. We are either teaching someone, or they are teaching us – both good and bad. Learn from your experiences and move on with life.
To Fester, Or Forgive
Recently, a peer did a short talk on forgiveness, as part of a healing service. Besides her being courageous, sharing aspects of her personal challenges with parents and peers, she also offered a reminder of how instrumental forgiving ourselves is in our healing journey.
The reptilian, primitive part of the brain has a default state of always monitoring its environment. The hunter-gatherer ancestral days had us on constant alert. Anxious. Awaiting possible threat by the saber-tooth tiger. But our modern brain has evolved such, that when we are not active in a task, the brain occupies itself with dwelling on the past.
The idle brain tends to ponder past events and unpleasant thoughts, that in the default state, fill us with anxiety. Pain. Guilt. Self-blame. Shame. Anger. Disappointment.
The typical memories and thoughts, that can consume us in this default state, vary. Some are large and life-changing, such as the loss of a loved one or favorite pet, financial loss, divorce, adultery, retrenchment, and physical or emotional abuse. Others are more behavioral or emotional, but can be just as debilitating.
When our life is ‘heading south’ and we cannot seem to turn things around, we tend to replay the situation. This can lead to becoming more depressed, and having more reason to doubt ourselves. A vicious cycle can result. We spin and spin…like laundry in the dryer, being tumbled. If we remain in that dryer, resentment sets in.
The Year Of The Emperor
During my psychic Tarot readings, I often ask my clients for the month, day, and year of their birth, so that I can equate their Tarot lifetime archetype and current year cards. Tarot numerology has always been spot on in my readings, and it has also been accurate on a grander level, when looking at the current year in general.
The year 2019, when added across calculates as 2 + 0 + 1 + 9 = 12, which reduced equates to 1 + 2 = 3. These numerological calculations of 12 and 3 correspond to two cards in the Tarot.
The first is The Hanged Man (12), that often shows up in s spread when there is a sacrifice to be made, hold-ups, the need to let go of hang-ups, seeing life from a different perspective, or an overall feeling of waiting in general. This state of limbo is often seen as a voluntary sacrifice for a greater cause on a more macrocosmic level.
The Empress card (3), represents fertility, pregnancy, motherhood, female entrepreneurship, or mother to the son in the Hanged Man card.
What could these two cards be saying on a numerological level about 2019? I thought about this on New Year’s eve, as we were crossing into 2020. What sacrifices did we make on a personal level in 2019, as well as on a worldly level?
It appears there was a division of opinions on a mass scale, about many different topics, as well as a need for us to look at the ‘hang-ups’ that we were holding onto, and to see them from an outside perspective. Humanity, as a whole was in a way, on hold and pregnant with what we will give birth to this year, in 2020.
Cast Fear Aside And Embrace Courage!
I once read about a woman in a very unhappy relationship. She sought counsel from a highly-revered spiritual leader. In a calming tone, the spiritual guru cautioned that in order to gain marital happiness, the woman would need to let go of the partner she lacked happiness with.
The woman confusingly gazed upon the sage, with her hands tightly tucked under her chair. Again, the holy man repeated that in order for the right man to walk through the door, she would need to let go of the wrong man.
Even more puzzled, the woman confided that she was afraid of being alone. Her teacher, taken aback, turned to the woman and announced that fear was a disease of the mind and the heart – if allowed, fear would keep her in a state of perpetual unhappiness.
How many times have you missed out on life’s many blessings, because you were afraid of moving to a new place, changing career lanes, or ending a relationship with someone who did not honor your greatest dreams? Each of us has experienced these moments of stalemate consciousness in our lives, and each of us has become crippled by fear at some point.
Let me remind you that while a lack of confidence might only slow down your dreams, fear will completely get in the way of the manifestation of your greatest desires and goals. Without personal growth and courage, the formula will not change, and your life will remain the same.