self-confidence
Learning To Accept Yourself (Warts And All)
A consistent trend I have noticed doing psychic readings and metaphysical counseling for many years. This trend relates to rejection, and our reaction to being rejected by our human family. It is not natural to abandon or reject loved ones, but in my experience as a pastoral counselor and psychic healer, I have noticed that it is a challenge that many have faced in this life.
Recently, as I was doing a channeling session with one of my clients, this came up and we both had a revelation about our own experiences of rejection. The discussion we had was not only about rejection and how we as humans experience it, but also about how we perceive acceptance. Our experience of rejection comes from only one source, namely our expectation, and also how we resonate with the acceptance we receive from others.
When we are children it is natural for us to allow our parents to be our source. They were the picture of God in our lives, and in ideal situations they were our source of acceptance, providing nurture and stability. Many times, when you see a religious group adopting a vengeful and cruel depiction of the Divine, it stems from a refusal to remove the archetypal depiction from God they experienced with their parents.
Many times, the search for source extends itself outward, and the responsibility of our fulfillment is put on other people or organizations. In some cases, fulfillment is found in substances and can also lead to addictive behaviors. We look to these external ‘sources’ to provide us comfort and satisfaction.
It is natural for us to live in community and relationships, so our endeavors toward fulfillment are often projected outward in our relationships. Unfortunately, since we all have an intrinsic need to identify with and live from Source, we find ourselves continually reaching for fulfillment that we rarely find. This leads to heartache, loss, and broken relationships within the human family.
Only You Can Achieve Your Goals
The indigenous peoples of Canada traditionally believe that those born under the Budding Trees Moon (which occurs in the spring months of mid-March to mid-April) have incredible potential to excel in whatever goals they choose for their life. However, it is also said that some of these blessed individuals may be unwise in their expectations of their own abilities, which may slow their progress, or even prevent them from moving forward at all.
It is further believed that this may also happen if they tell a friend or family member what they are hoping to achieve in life, and them not being supportive. Instead of encouraging them, and expressing their faith in their abilities, they might instead call them an unrealistic dreamer or sceptically say they will believe it when they see it. Yes, sadly, it is usually those who are supposed to be our primary support system in life who tend to not believe in us, and least support our dreams.
There is much wisdom in the teachings of the ancient aboriginal peoples. Yes, we can achieve whatever we set our mind to, and anything is indeed possible, but we must also be mindful of our expectations. It does not matter what the goal itself is; what matters most is our own expectations of being able to achieve it.
If we do not believe in our own abilities to achieve even our most modest goals, we will continuously suffer from self-doubt, feel overwhelmed, and never feel worthy enough.
No matter what we choose to aim for in life, it is simply that: a choice. Your choice. No one can stop you, except yourself, and nobody else can get into your head to put you down, unless you let them. No matter what choice you are making, you must also stand behind it every step of the way.
Vulnerability Grows Your Abundance Garden
Vulnerability is a critical element that determines our ability to receive from the Universe. I often tell my clients we may have to break a few eggs to save the dozen. Without ever taking the risk of making ourselves vulnerable there can be now growth, no progress, no expansion, and no abundance. This means if we dare to make mistakes, we eventually gain the ability to help more people, than if we kept ourselves covered and rigidly in control of how others see us.
Imagine yourself carefully harvesting chicken eggs and preparing to bring them to a farmer’s market for sale. But then you set off with a restrictive, limiting, fearful strategy of clasping those eggs frantically under one arm…for fear of dropping them all on the ground.
“I’m in complete control,” you proudly claim. But are you really?
Consider how tired your shoulders and arms would soon become, and how long it will be before some of those precious eggs are either crushed or dropped.
In the end, we usually give up on the idea of taking our eggs to the market, for fear of not being able to successfully complete the journey. Instead, we store those eggs in the refrigerator in the hope of feeling strong enough or muster enough courage sometime in the future.
But all is not lost, and it is never too late. We can circle back to something that is unfinished at any time, even if we initially felt we bit off more than we could chew. The Divine Feminine energy often works this way. Roundabout, yet sincere about eventually finishing the journey. She is thoughtful enough to improve herself and return with renewed vigor to what she started.
So, find it within yourself to return to that fridge and retrieve those stored eggs with renewed courage. Then once again set out to bring them to market. This time, you may just find it more manageable, and you may just make it all the way. There you may just be welcomed with open arms at the market…this time with all your eggs intact and everyone keen to purchase them!
Conscious Living In A Fear-Based Culture
There are five basic emotions: fear, anger, grief, love and joy; in this order, because this is the order in which most humans experience these emotions.
I am sure you know many people who are fear-based. Perhaps you are fear-based yourself? Fear-based people have allowed our culture to blackmail them into believing that they must live up to certain standards to be acceptable.
For example, many people are dealing with this uncertain economy through the lens of “Oh, we must maintain the status quo, no matter what!”
Try to see this imagined burden for what it is: a mirage, not to mention an energy leak. This mirage stems from the fear that we won’t be able to keep up appearances; in other words not be able to afford the items that our fear-based culture with its lack consciousness and scarcity mentality decrees makes us acceptable to the status quo.
In fact, we could all do just as well with much less, and feel good about ourselves and our efforts; maybe even better because there would be more integrity in our energy, because we would be living in truth!
There are countless other ways our culture perpetuates this hoax. Think about it. I am sure you can think of many more examples. One way to break the chain of this mindless brainwashing is to realize it is really none of our business what others think of us, and vice versa.
Now, think of a squirrel. A squirrel just goes about his business of doing what squirrels do. If he stumbles upon a big, fat, juicy acorn, that is good. But if he doesn’t, he continues to go about his business just the same, and either way life is good, whether his fare is meager, robust or in-between. And, he isn’t concerned about what the other squirrels think about him either way.
What Were You Thinking!
Looking back on your life, I’m sure you, like myself, have often questioned certain people you hung out with and wondered why you wasted so much time dating or hanging out with them; or you wonder why you told that certain person something very private, which later came back to bite you, because you discovered that your confidante was a back-stabber. They key after you learn such a life lesson, is not to repeat it. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.
The good news is that there is enlightenment to be had and reaped from ill decisions made in the past. You don’t have to keep rehashing it over and over in your head; you can say: “What was I thinking?” Be glad you have learned from it, because now you are free from to move forward.
So many people are not shifting forward, because they keep tripping up over bad choices from the past. For example, they may feel that they cannot date a certain type of person, because they had a bad experience dating someone like that in the past and now they don’t want to give love a chance. I believe love always hurts one way or another – whether it’s a healthy relationship or a bad romance. It’s all about learning how much of yourself to give.
I have heard so many say, “I wish I had the self-esteem I have now back then. I was young and I had the body, and I was in better shape.” Don’t have regrets. Be thankful you finally learned to love yourself enough to not worry about what you do, or don’t have now.
Enlightenment and self-knowledge comes with age, but some never pick up on what life lessons had been laid down for them. They keep repeating the same mistakes, and hence have to come back and do it all over in another lifetime.
Empaths Need Firm Psychosocial Boundaries
Psychosocial balance is tricky for the empath. It requires managing expectations, checking our reactions and emotions, and most especially setting boundaries. Because it is so easy for us to link into the feelings and emotions of those around us, empaths often forget that others may not respond in kind.
For the empath it’s all about balancing your intuitive gifts with your expectations, and finally your responses. Work, friendships, relationships, all the things that encompass our daily lives, require vigilance to ensure that balance is maintained, or chaos will ensue.
For the Type A empath, jobs, friendships and relationships can end very abruptly with major repercussions. The more assertive empath tends to have the motto of “do unto others before they do unto you.” They will leave a job, a relationship or a friendship at the drop of a hat. The more subdued, timid empath tends to stay in miserable job situations, one-sided friendships, and sometimes downright abusive intimate relationships.
At work especially it is very important for all empaths to remember that there is almost always going to be some personality clashes. Others do not always view us favorably. Remember that you are there to do a job – your job. Staying focused on your work, the requirements of that job and your performance is your primary responsibility. Confronting someone, especially a superior, with “what’s your problem, I know you don’t like me” is counterproductive. Similarly the typical response of the introverted empath to quit, or at least never address any issues, is also futile.
Yes, it can be gut-wrenching or infuriating for empaths to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a co-worker or boss doesn’t care for them, or has it out for them, but utilize your gift! As an empath you can read the feelings and intentions of others. This gives you a map to the personalities you are dealing with. Use that information to moderate your own responses to the situation and the individuals you are dealing with in your professional environment.
How To Find Your Direction In Life
As a professional psychic, I have done readings for many people over the years who have lost their sense of direction in life. They usually ask questions about where there life might be going.
“Where do you want it to go?” I then reply.
“To a better place!” is the frequent response, although they typically do not know what they really want, or why they even want it!
The purpose of a psychic reading, I then explain, is to look at what possibilities and opportunities life has to offer each person. However, being co-creators with the Divine, God, Source, Spirit, the Universe, we first need to get clarity about what we actually want from life. After all, how can the Universe send you what you wish for, when you don’t know what it is yet?
Once we are fully aware and clear about what we want, we can begin asking for it and align our energy to the desired end result. This is how we ultimately attract what we desire and deserve – more often than not with greater speed and abundance.
Have you been tossed and turned by the storms of life to such the extent that you no longer quite know where you are heading, or need to be? If so, then you need to find a sense of direction. To set your internal compass towards a more fulfilling, meaningful life blessed by the Universe, consider the following strategies:
Go From Inactive To Proactive
Stepping outside of one’s comfort zone is easier said than done. However, to find new direction in your life you must end the procrastination. Figure out what you really want in life and start taking measurable action steps to begin achieving it.