Love & Relationships
Empaths Need Firm Psychosocial Boundaries
Psychosocial balance is tricky for the empath. It requires managing expectations, checking our reactions and emotions, and most especially setting boundaries. Because it is so easy for us to link into the feelings and emotions of those around us, empaths often forget that others may not respond in kind.
For the empath it’s all about balancing your intuitive gifts with your expectations, and finally your responses. Work, friendships, relationships, all the things that encompass our daily lives, require vigilance to ensure that balance is maintained, or chaos will ensue.
For the Type A empath, jobs, friendships and relationships can end very abruptly with major repercussions. The more assertive empath tends to have the motto of “do unto others before they do unto you.” They will leave a job, a relationship or a friendship at the drop of a hat. The more subdued, timid empath tends to stay in miserable job situations, one-sided friendships, and sometimes downright abusive intimate relationships.
At work especially it is very important for all empaths to remember that there is almost always going to be some personality clashes. Others do not always view us favorably. Remember that you are there to do a job – your job. Staying focused on your work, the requirements of that job and your performance is your primary responsibility. Confronting someone, especially a superior, with “what’s your problem, I know you don’t like me” is counterproductive. Similarly the typical response of the introverted empath to quit, or at least never address any issues, is also futile.
Yes, it can be gut-wrenching or infuriating for empaths to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a co-worker or boss doesn’t care for them, or has it out for them, but utilize your gift! As an empath you can read the feelings and intentions of others. This gives you a map to the personalities you are dealing with. Use that information to moderate your own responses to the situation and the individuals you are dealing with in your professional environment.
How To Get More From Your Psychic Reading
I can’t count the number of times I have been consulting with someone who says, “I’m so confused, I’m hearing so many different answers from different psychics, I don’t know what to believe anymore.”
First and foremost, remember that different psychics have different methods of reading. Depending upon the psychic and the reading method used, different aspects of the situation will be revealed. You can clarify the information that is coming forth very simply by asking a direct, specific question. After all, it is your time and your money.
When you ask a specific question it allows the psychics to focus on that particular energy. If you are not clear about your goals for the psychic reading, then all the significant energy affecting your life at that moment comes to the surface. The question that is most important may just get lost and go unanswered among all the other information comes through.
You shouldn’t have to go into great detail with the psychic. Asking a clear question is very different from feeding your psychic information. If the reading is on track the psychic will be able to pick up on details or aspects that will verify for you that the right person, place or situation is being brought forward. If this isn’t happening, or your instincts tell you the connection is not good, then stop the reading. Psychics are either linked in and on target, or we are not.
Having said that, remember that most of us have had more than one relationship in our lives and for many, more than one significant relationship. The heart remembers them all and holds them for us to remember, learn and grow from. Sometimes in a reading a past relationship will come up, because it has great bearing on the current relationship. If there is still resentment, fear, or hurt, or we haven’t completely let go of the past, this energy tends to come up in the reading.
It is important that relevant information come forward pertaining to your question, so that you can see how your past is affecting your present. This is true of business relationships, career, finances, family and romance.
Healing The Karmic Patterns Of Ancestral Trauma
Sometimes during meditation, I recall past events and childhood memories that had been long forgotten. A recent vision, for example, took me back to the home I was raised in. But the scene was one I do not remember.
I saw myself as a little girl, around three years old, and members of my mother’s family were visiting us. Everyone was singing and playing instruments together. I saw myself watching them and enjoying the music, but then felt guided to look diagonally upward to another scene happening simultaneously.
In the other scene I saw my ancestors; at least that is what I concurred because they were going back in a line. Behind my great grandmother, who was playing the piano, there were people who I sensed to be her parents, and then her grandparents behind them, and so on.
In that glimpse into the distant past, I observed how the behavioral patterns and family dynamics of our ancestors, some of it dysfunctional and unhealthy, had become the patterns of my family. I also saw how these patterns were passed on to me and how it has shaped the patterns in my life and my own family to this day.
I then invoked the Heavenly Light to wash over all of us: myself and my family, my living relatives, all my ancestors who came before us, as well as all of our future descendants. I prayed that all of the disharmony in my family lineage be healed, and also that any other families and individuals we had disharmonious interactions and relationships with be healed too.
In Hawaiian culture this kind of healing prayer is known as Ho’oponopono. It is an ancient spiritual practice of reconciliation and forgiveness, which in English literally translates to ‘to make right,’ or ‘to make good.’ Ho’oponopono is essentially a personal responsibility and forgiveness prayer or ritual to heal, among other things, feuding families and ancestral trauma. When practiced repeatedly, it is said to balance out karma. I do believe in praying for those who wronged or harmed us, because within their healing we find our own as well.
Plucking An Eyelash Changes The Universe
The decisions you make today will decide the outcome of your life tomorrow. No matter how small or big these decisions may seem to be.
We have all been in those situations where we had to make an important decision. Should I leave, or should I stay? Should I pursue a new relationship, or should I stick with the one I am currently in? Is all this effort really worth it? One of the most difficult things you will ever have to do is make that all-important life changing decision.
When my grandpa was in the hospital, we had to make the tough decision to either turn off his life support or keep him alive and let him keep on taking morphine. We made the decision to let him go. Fortunately, he made it easy for us to decide, because it was his wish in life that it should be done, if ever it had to come to that.
Afterwards he did come to me in spirit and shared that he was grateful we did it after all. I knew we had made the right choice, but it was still nice getting that confirmation from him directly.
But such are not the only challenging decisions we face in life. I deal with people every day who face difficult choices or are at a crossroads in life. Sometimes they face what may appear to be a simple decision, but it is not. They ask me things like, “Should I go with this new guy, who contacted me on Facebook, or should I work things out with my marriage of 25 years?”
I always tell people to let their intuition be their guide. I get a lot of people, women mostly, asking me how do they know to trust there intuition; how do they know it is guiding them in the right direction? I tell them to spend some time just being quiet, and to really meditate and feel what their Higher Self is telling them to do.
The Feminine Power Of The Sacral Chakra
During the recent Mercury retrograde, I lost my apartment keys. In a moment of wanderlust, my keys had slipped out of my pocket during an outing.
It happened on a Sunday, and it was a holiday weekend to boot. The office at my apartment complex wouldn’t open until the Tuesday. So, I was either stuck in my home for two more days, or I could impart creative solutions.
I chose to do the latter.
My daughter stays with me some days of the week, as well as every other weekend. The other days she is with my ex-husband. I asked if he could drop her off a day early, so I could go out and buy groceries while she was here. Then she could buzz me back into the apartment.
When we face problems, a key ingredient in navigating solutions is creativity. This is partly supported by the sacral chakra that inspires us past challenging, endless obstacles.
Communicated by the throat chakra, the other creative center in the system, the sacral center radiates joy when a solution appears.
The sacral chakra is one of the three feminine energy centers of power, along with the heart chakra and third eye. If all three are balanced in the female body, she attracts abundance in love, financial matters, and friendships with ease. Her solutions are naturally inspired by love emanating from her being. Nothing is expected in return. Those who have benefitted from her help give back to her out of gratitude. Continue reading
Who’s To Say If It’s Good, Or Bad?
Who’s to say if it’s good, or bad? There is a wise Buddhist children’s story I often read to my son that answers this question.
A young boy tells his father in a panicked, desperate tone, that his horse has gone missing. He is obviously very distraught and terrified he will never see his horse again.
The father says, “Who is to say that this situation is good, or bad?”
The son, of course, is confused. How could the loss of his horse not be a bad thing?
They go out into the woods to search for the horse. After many long days, they eventually find the horse. It has since made friends with a wild horse.
The father turns to the son and says, “See? Now you have two horses!”
But on the way back home the son stumbles and injures his leg. Again, he is miserable and terribly distraught. He tells his dad this is the worst possible thing that could happen. Now he will not be able to ride his horse.
His father says, “Who is to say that this situation is good, or bad?”
Of course, the son is perplexed and cannot figure out how injuring his leg could possibly be a good thing?
A week later, some of the son’s friends come to visit him. They tell him that they have been commanded to head out to war, along with all men over the age of 18. They tell the son he is lucky to have broken his leg, because now he would not be required to go to war with them.
Over the years, I have known many people, especially energy healing clients and Yoga students, who had suffered serious illness or injury…who later said it actually saved their lives, or brought them significant personal and spiritual growth, joy, fulfilment, and even bliss.
Communication Is Key To A Healthy Relationship
The one thing we all want in life is to really be seen and heard. We also have the right to our own opinion and to not be judged for the way we think or feel. When we become good communicators, our interactions with others become so much easier and more constructive.
A common reason why many relationships end is because a couple just don’t seem to be able to communicate their thoughts and feelings clearly to each other. Yes, sometimes it really is that simple.
But expressing your intent clearly, so others understand without a doubt what is being said, is not easy when you feel the person you are trying to talk to is only ‘half listening’ to you.
When giving a psychic medium reading one of the biggest complaints about a relationship issue that I often hear is that my client’s partner “never listens” to them. When they try to talk about important things, the other person changes the subject or remains distracted. They don’t care enough about the other persons feelings to even discuss the topic.
Not only being able to communicate clearly but also being a good listener is the foundation for a healthy, fulfilling, and lasting relationship. When we really listen to what other people are saying, it shows respect and caring for the person or situation being discussed. When people feel they are heard, it encourages them to open up and share their feelings and opinions.
When you would like to have a heart-to-heart talk with someone, your facial expressions and posture say a lot before you even begin to speak. When you sit down to discuss any issue with your arms crossed, for example, it does not convey “I’m open to what you have to say.” When you fidget or keep looking at your phone, it sends the message you can’t wait to talk, or the phone is more important than the conversation. When you try to make eye contact it translates as caring enough to pay attention. When you are speaking to anyone, and they do the old eye roll that sends a clear direct message of how they feel.