sadness
Empaths And Endings
Anger is one of the most difficult emotions for the empath to navigate, and the ending of a relationship is definitely one of the most challenging of all.
Any relationship that falls apart is tough, but if you are an empath you may well find yourself trying to navigate some very overwhelming waters. Not only will you be feeling your own pain, anger and confusion, but you will also sense your partner’s feelings, and possibly even that of your families and mutual friends.
Trying to make sense of all these emotional energies, staying centered and sorting out your own feelings separate from your partner’s is a very tall order.
Chances are you have also been sensing that something had been radically amiss for some time, before your love finally went on the rocks. It is important to take time to look back and remember when you first sensed something was off. Empaths are often aware of their partner’s moods and feelings, and may act on it too prematurely. Pushing too soon can result in the partner shutting down, or insisting that nothing is wrong. The problem is, however, that an empath will feel that something is wrong and will not be able to shake that feeling. You knew something was wrong… and you were right!
It is critical that you shift your focus away from your partner and towards taking care of yourself. Allow your emotions to flow. An empath is always going to be more focused on the other party’s actions, reactions and feelings. You automatically link in to them instead of you. To move through this painful experience you must shift your focus and concentrate on you.
Healing From A Relationship Break-Up
Breaking up with someone can be one of the most difficult experiences in life, especially when it is a long and deeply meaningful relationship. It can feel impossible to see any future without that person and very difficult to move on and find joy in life again.
I find many of my clients do not realize that dealing with a break-up or divorce is very similar to processing the bereavement and grief associated with the passing of a loved one. It is often accompanied by agonizing sorrow, intense feelings of despair, and an all-encompassing sense of loss and confusion.
According to clinical psychologist Dr. Tricia Wolanin it is actually “the death of a relationship, hopes and dreams for the future. The person we are losing was a big part of our world and therefore has taken up so much of our mental and heart space.”
It is however possible to recover, heal and move on after any breakup or divorce. In my work I have found the following strategies to be helpful for clients who go through this kind of life challenge.
Avoid Major Life Decisions
It is usually not a good idea to make any important life decisions if you are working through the aftermath of a breakup. This includes changing your job or career, relocating, or making other drastic changes to your life. It is vital to take some time to heal and reflect on the situation before making hasty life-changing decisions that you may later live to regret.
What If There Is No Tomorrow?
A sense of anguish sometimes strikes us while we are experiencing something good in our life. In the midst of the delightful feelings of happiness and joy, we grimly remind ourselves that we must enjoy it while it lasts, because all good things come to an end.
Yes, everything does come to an end, right up to our own passing from this world to the next. Yes…our inevitable death. Thinking about this can be sad and depressing, but it also not… if we choose otherwise.
There is an ancient philosophy of reflecting on one’s mortality known as memento mori, which in Latin means ‘remember death.’ This profound saying does not only serve to remind us of that our death is inevitable, but also invites us to think about death in a more meaningful way.
In Stoicism, a school of ancient Greek philosophy, memento mori was seen to be a thought process to attribute deeper meaning to life. The philosopher Epictetus famously said, “Keep death and exile before your eyes every day, with all that seems terrible – by doing this, you will never have a base thought, nor an excessive desire.”
Although the notion of memento mori seems at first scary, sad, or tragic, it is in truth a reminder that everything and everyone will eventually come to an end. The moment we sensibly embrace this universal truth, we become so much more aware of how precious every moment of our life is. And ideally it then inspires us to live more fully and intensely, without wasting any more time on trivial things and petty issues.
The Healing Energies Of Plant Spirits
Here in Latin America there is a rich tradition of herbalism and ceremonial, shamanic spiritual medicine. There has also been in recent times a global revival of plant medicine and natural healing practices, as well as a renewed interest in related indigenous wisdom traditions found in many cultures all over the world.
As a result of modern science, we have largely abandoned and forgotten the fountain of knowledge the aborigines had regarding healing and natural harmony. It took us several centuries to realize what we have lost and overlooked in the process.
Herbalism is however not only about natural medicine potentially having fewer side effects than modern pharmaceuticals. It is also about the innate energetic qualities we share with a particular plant. This approach to healin stems from a worldview that fully integrates man and nature.
In local tradition, near the Andes, the timing is just as important as the type of plant used for healing purposes. Depending on the season, or the phase of moon, for instance, the plant’s properties will vary, and its effectiveness less than optimal if used at the inappropriate time.
Both the healer and their patient’s attitude towards the plant itself is also an important factor in the healing process, as the respect and gratitude shown to the plant will determine its healing ability.
In shamanic herbalist practices it vital to understand that all entities are considered to have elemental energy, including plants and humans. This is the metaphysical premise of all plant medicine and magic. In fact, for the traditional herbalist all plants have spirits. And each one has specific faculties and properties at different levels or frequencies that can heal us in mind, body and soul.
Never Allow Regret To Hold You Back
Recently, I attended a celebration of life gathering held in memory of a friend who died under tragic circumstances. He was an incredible energy healer, and also exquisitely crafted Native American flutes and drums. We had been friends for decades, but over the years we saw less and less of each other. The relationship between us was, however, a matter of ‘out of sight, out of mind.’
Our individual schedules were such that life eventually got in the way. There was however an unmistakable mutual respect and heart-centered connection between us facilitated by Spirit whenever we did meet. We would offer each other guidance, support, and fresh perspectives in those special moments.
My friend and his wife met about two decades ago at a spiritual event and eventually became an incredible spiritual team. Before they met, I remember his future wife asking me to swap readings with her.
“Sure, why not?” I said, although I was actually quite nervous and still new to doing readings on a ‘professional basis.’
When I read for her, the information that came through included various confirmations regarding her spiritual work, including her music, becoming an author, teaching, and her increased spirit connection. Last, but not least, there was also the indication of a potential romantic relationship, including a timeframe for approximately when this might unfold. Soon after, the two of them met. Over the years, it was great to see their relationship blossom and thrive. They truly became partners in life, love, and business.
May Our Souls Continue To Rejoice
We have indeed so much to be grateful for today. May the joys and rememberances of this post-pandemic holiday season keep our hearts alive with hope, faith and gratitude throughout the coming year.
May our souls continue to rejoice with the miracles of joy, hope, faith and love of the Christmas of the Christians; Yule of the Pagans; Candle-mas of the Celts; Hanukkah of the Hebrews; Eid ul-Fitr of Islam; Pan-African festival of Kwanzaa; and Hindu celebration of Diwali.
In the old days, before the reformers came, the Old Oak King conquered the Holly King every year around this time. Mother Earth would then sleep under a white blanket of snow, the quiet ice of still waters, everything waiting for the Summer Solstice, when the Holly King would win the battle in turn.
We face the same battles of duality in our own lives. At times we are happily progressing along our own path, expanding, learning, growing spiritually, when suddenly an impasse comes along that requires us to become still, to be patient, to wait, to rest, to contemplate, to accept. We are seldom thankful, as we would prefer to continue rushing towards our goals, our dreams, our desires. We grumble, we complain, we resist, we fight the wait, and then we wonder why we are waiting so long.
Sometimes we are meant to just take the time to rest, draw strength, find ourselves. The true lesson and miracle of this season is the wait, the peace, the rest, until we once again see our dreams more clearly.
The Healing Power Of A Smile
I have noticed something very interesting lately, since we are no longer wearing masks in public. There are two types of people: those who often smile and laugh, and those who do not. You can smile at some people that seem to not be very happy and they will smile right back at you, while others will just look at you like you’re an alien.
I love to smile at people and change their energy, it uplifts them. I can tell. I can see the auric energy around those who smile, and it’s much brighter and lighter. It’s a healing, positive energy. Those that don’t smile have dark and cloudy auras. It makes me feel good to help people get into a better mood and access their higher consciousness, as it will just keep the ball rolling for a positive domino effect for the rest of their day.
But there are those people who find nothing pleasant or amusing and will not smile for anything. I understand that sometimes life just seems to hand us a bad hand of cards, or just seems depressing or no fun. But we all have the ability to smile and our sense of humor is a gift from God. If you can’t smile for yourself to change your own energy, or find yourself unable smile back at those that smile at you, maybe take a look in the mirror and that may inspire you to crack a smile. It changes energy and lives.
As a psychic, I consult many people who are in unloving relationships and marriages. They stay with partners who are unkind, abusive, or unfaithful. They carry a torch for spouses who talk them down to them and make them feel less than. For many it causes mental and physical health problems.