belonging
The True Meaning Of Holiday Gifts
While wrapping Christmas gifts for family and friends today, I thought about whether it is better to be on the giving or receiving end of presents during the holiday season?
In my childhood, receiving presents was undoubtedly the best! But my parents also taught me the importance of giving. They gave my sister and me a small allowance during the holidays to buy gifts for others. It was fun to shop for small items to give to our loved ones. With much anticipation, wetried to pick things that people would actually like and appreciate.
I therefore learned early on that while receiving gifts can be exciting and fun, giving them can be even more rewarding.
My parents were certainly on to something, because the value of giving has been scientifically proven to be more than just a sweet sentiment. For example, according to a study by the American Psychological Association, giving to others increases life expectancy by at least five years! Another study found that people who give to others experience lower blood pressure, less depression, and lower stress levels. In addition, giving to others can increase happiness and well-being. A Harvard Business School study found that giving money to someone else increased participants’ happiness more than spending it on themselves.
Calling In Your Beloved This Holiday Season
The holidays are a time of love, belonging and togetherness. It’s traditionally a special time of year when families gather, friends reconnect, and hearts open to the magic of the season.
For singles on a spiritual journey who are seeking a meaningful romantic connection, the holidays can also be a powerful time to call in that special someone. The vibrational frequencies of the holiday season are a perfect time to ignite such a unique romantic connection. Energetically, it is similar to meeting your future partner at a friend’s or relative’s wedding!
How does this work? Metaphysically or energetically speaking, it is necessary to become a vibrational match to your future partner in order to attract them into your life. You must adjust or calibrate your overall energy vibration to match the type of person you desire to be with in a long-term relationship. This involves cultivating positive thoughts, emotions, and actions that resonate with the qualities and characteristics you seek in a partner.
This concept of vibrational energy alignment is related to the Law of Attraction (like attracts like), the Law of Vibration (everything is energy and vibrates at a certain frequency), and the Law of Cause and Effect (we reap what we sow). According to these universal metaphysical principles that govern our lives, the energy vibration we emit attracts people and circumstances with similar energies into our lives.
Good Old-Fashioned Human Connection
Recently I met up with a good friend whom I had not seen in a long time. Our friendship began nine years ago when I lived in another province of Spain, adjacent to the one where I now live.
Of course, since I moved, we see less of each other. Once in a while I drive over to see her, and a round trip takes me about two and a half hours.
She is a vibrant, kind woman who, along with her extended family, helped me through a particularly difficult time a few years ago. They always made me feel very welcome when I lived there and tried very hard to persuade me not to move away!
She can be great company, but lately she has not been as present as she was when we first met. You might have guessed why. Yes, indeed, social media on her phone has become a major new focus for her. It has become a significant distraction during our visits in recent months.
Knowing how kind, generous and caring she truly is, I do not take it personally. I realize that, like many people around the world, her social media messaging and texting became an important substitute for the lack of personal interaction and social connection during the isolated, lonely times caused by the recent pandemic. For many, it has since become a habit and a new way of life, and for some, an addiction.
A few days ago, thankfully, she had an epiphany for which one can only pray. Instead of her constantly scrolling through her phone, we spent some quality time together for a change, strolling around town, eating lunch, and talking non-stop like we had not seen each other in years!
The Transformative Power Of Vulnerability
I find that spirit wants to remind us that vulnerability offers us a special kind of magic in our lives. It is a theme that comes up regularly in psychic readings I do for my clients.
Vulnerability can transform lives, careers, relationships and families in profound ways. But for many of us, life has taught us that being vulnerable is a ‘weakness’ that puts us at risk.
Many of us have built walls around ourselves to protect ourselves because we feel we risk rejection, judgment, or failure if we allow ourselves to be vulnerable. The ego tells us it’s best not to take those risks at all!
Instead, we harden our hearts and keep our distance, choosing to figure out what others might think, feel or do before we are willing to put ourselves out there in any way.
But by shying away from being open, authentic, and transparent with our thoughts, feelings, hopes, fears, and desires, we actually block the very outcomes in life that we hope for.
So, how do you get more comfortable opening up and allowing yourself to be authentic and vulnerable? And how does that open you up to the very results you want to manifest in your life?
Comparison Poisons The Heart, Mind And Soul
When we are going through difficult times, we tend to compare our struggles and suffering to the lives of others and measure ourselves by their perceived happiness, joy and success.
We often do this these days by comparing our own lives to what others post on social media. Then we judge and mentally torture ourselves for not living up to other people’s highlight reels of happiness and good fortune.
Sure, it is sometimes beneficial to self-reflect and strive for more based on the examples of others who serve as our role models. However, when we indiscriminately compare our own life journey to everyone else’s, we end up diminishing our own uniqueness and value.
While social comparison can motivate us to improve and grow, it can also lead to toxic self-judgment, envy, resentment, and extreme unhappiness. Constantly focusing on the highlights of other people’s lives quickly becomes toxic and self-destructive.
However, this tendency is not a character flaw in some of us. In fact, it is a natural evolutionary instinct that we all have. Our ancestors survived by living in social groups. Our tendency to compare ourselves to others is therefore a very common human trait, rooted in our evolution as a species.
We Need To Reopen Our Hearts
If, like me, you are highly sensitive to energies, I am sure you have noticed the alarming increase in anger, hatred, callousness, and cruelty in our society in recent times. It seems many people’s hearts have hardened. In my view, this is due to a post-pandemic heart chakra problem in our culture.
For example, one issue I have been finding more of in post-pandemic readings is an inability for many of my callers to remain ‘in the flow’ with their romantic partners. Some of my clients are either overly focused on, and extremely loyal to a partner who clearly doesn’t deserve it, or they are too rigid in keeping their distance and even avoiding contact. I have also been noticing more of this with people’s friendships and interactions with their relatives.
Of course, we must set healthy boundaries in all our relationships for the sake of our own well-being. Without proper boundaries we will become too exhausted and energetically drained to be of any use to others. By taking good care of ourselves, we also take better care of others and will have more to give.
But there’s a difference between healthy boundaries and ‘excommunicating’ just about everyone across-the-board. ‘Blocking,’ ‘banning,’ and ‘ghosting’ every person who dares to express a different point of view on social media, and disowning every person in your life who has the nerve to do or say the slightest thing that may annoy you, is not exactly setting healthy boundaries. It is rather a sign of having very weak, fickle boundaries. If this has become your way of being in the world, then you may want to consider doing some heart chakra energy work.
Some Days Are Diamonds
Some days in life stand out as exceptional, memorable and even magical. Personally, I have experienced several such days to date. I can recall each of these enchanted days vividly, because of the way everything seemed to fall into place perfectly, from start to finish. On these days there were amazing synchronicities with people, places, events and circumstances that all came together to create the perfect moment in time. In these moments I felt completely aligned within myself, everyone else around me, as well as the entire Universe.
It’s been a while since I had such an amazing day. The Covid-19 pandemic especially have played a role in this, causing for me a sense of disjointedness and isolation. I made a real effort to get out of the house as much as possible, even having lunch here and there by myself. I even attempted to strike up new friendships, but none of these connections quite gelled or there was a lack of follow-up on either side. I accept that those potential new friendships simply were not meant to be.
It is said that our deepest, longest-lasting friendships are formed earlier on in life. For me this is true, as I remain in touch on a daily basis with friends I left behind a few years ago when leaving South Africa. Some of those individuals have since scattered to various corners of the world, but many of us still stay in touch, even if only to touch base now and again. Then there are also those special friends that I communicate with almost every day, from Bali to South Africa, to South America, and beyond. We are blessed these days to have the internet to be able to do this.
I also formed some online friendships during the height of Covid pandemic through various spiritual and metaphysical groups online, and I have been keeping in touch with some of these acquaintances in other parts of the world.