self-healing
Reflections
Sitting on the porch. Rocking. Yes, rocking in my willow rocking chair, surrounded by the smell of petrichor – that delightful odor the earth gifts us with when fresh rain is coming down after a long, dry spell. The aroma of the freshly hung chile ristras greets me in the Santa Fe, New Mexico tradition at this time of year, when the growing season is done and the picking of the season’s ripe offerings has begun. Richness abounds with the aromas of the petrichor and the strung pods of red chile blending in the softness of the evening breeze.
The automatic flood light and the blue laser lights have come on, as they do every day at dusk, to illuminate the waterfall in the garden, although it’s still a bit early for them to shine their brightest. Not quite dark enough yet, but soon it will be. I just fed my precious four-legged fur daughter her dinner. Now that my day is done and another week has gone by, I am contemplating whether or not I have done well this week.
Yes, I believe so! I have learned so much and have grasped many new concepts. I also renewed my awareness of some familiar concepts that were in need of repetition, so I could complete some hard earned lessons. And I found resolution to some newer viewpoints on old issues. Whew! I feel I’ve been turned wrong side out in just one week, only to realize it is the other way around. I was wrong-side-out before. Now I’m right-side-in, or more so at least.
I look up from my musings to see the lights. It is dark now and they’re shining brightly against the dark night sky. The lasers look like blue fireflies as they pinpoint their magical presence. The synchronicity feels deeply significant. At the end of another week, after much breaking down of old thought patterns, I see the flood light and laser lights reflecting the realization that I am different now than last week, or at any time before.
Empaths And Endings
Anger is one of the most difficult emotions for the empath to navigate, and the ending of a relationship is definitely one of the most challenging of all.
Any relationship that falls apart is tough, but if you are an empath you may well find yourself trying to navigate some very overwhelming waters. Not only will you be feeling your own pain, anger and confusion, but you will also sense your partner’s feelings, and possibly even that of your families and mutual friends.
Trying to make sense of all these emotional energies, staying centered and sorting out your own feelings separate from your partner’s is a very tall order.
Chances are you have also been sensing that something had been radically amiss for some time, before your love finally went on the rocks. It is important to take time to look back and remember when you first sensed something was off. Empaths are often aware of their partner’s moods and feelings, and may act on it too prematurely. Pushing too soon can result in the partner shutting down, or insisting that nothing is wrong. The problem is, however, that an empath will feel that something is wrong and will not be able to shake that feeling. You knew something was wrong… and you were right!
It is critical that you shift your focus away from your partner and towards taking care of yourself. Allow your emotions to flow. An empath is always going to be more focused on the other party’s actions, reactions and feelings. You automatically link in to them instead of you. To move through this painful experience you must shift your focus and concentrate on you.
Dealing With Ancestral Karmic Debt
When a loved one crosses over, they transcend this dimension to enter the next. In the spirit dimension we revert from human ego consciousness back to universal consciousness, and our awareness is no longer limited by time and space.
I like to think of our constantly evolving soul or spirit as ‘cookie dough.’ When we cross over and revert to the broader perspective of universal consciousness, our soul energy is like a ball of dough that has been proofing for a lifetime.
As the Universe, or the Divine Cookie-Maker, rolls out the dough of our returning soul, there will be some karmic ‘lumps.’ These lumps are the unwise choices, mistakes, transgressions, missed opportunities, failures, crimes, and sins for which we didn’t make amends during this lifetime. It then becomes our karmic debt.
Some of these karmic debts go back many generations and have become part of the ancestral legacy of our soul family. It has sometimes dire consequences for everyone we are spiritually connected to in this life and the next. It becomes a shared responsibility for the entire soul family, for which someone needs to step up at some point to break the cycle.
Making amends and striving towards karmic healing is therefore not just something we do for our own sake, but also for those that came before us, and especially for those who will come after us.
Our ancestors on the Other Side are also continually striving to resolve their karmic debts, and for this they may need our help and support. If we hold them, or ourselves, in a state of unforgiveness, they cannot move forward with their karmic healing, or the next stages of their soul journey.
Are You Ready For The Unexpected?
It has been quite the saga with the dishwasher in my apartment! It has not worked properly for over a year now. The maintenance crew here at the apartment complex has been able to keep it going, but it keeps flooding and breaking down. They have however grown somewhat weary with the ongoing dish drama, but I still manage to gain some sympathy for my struggles.
The last time they came by to repair the temperamental kitchen appliance, it took three weeks for them to show up after I put in the maintenance request. They took me by surprise, but I am not sure who was startled more – me or them. You see, I sometimes like to work in my pajamas, and therefore I was not at all prepared for their visit! Fortunately, I was able to retreat to my home office and merely close the door.
It got me thinking about our everyday readiness to embrace the unexpected in life. As spirit beings we signed up for human adventure riddled with many twists and turns, as well as some adversity and unforeseen surprises. The only way to safely and successfully navigate all these ups and downs is to be guided by the higher self with the support of spirit.
When we raise our vibration through spiritual practice and a conscious lifestyle, we build a foundational state of readiness that empowers us to calmly expect the unexpected, and to always be prepared for anything.
I think of it as ‘Father Readiness.’ In The Bible, Matthew 24 states that “no one knows the day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”
It Is Never ‘Just A Dream’
People often say, “It was just a dream, it does not mean anything.” But in my experience our dreams always mean something, and sometimes it is profound.
Dreams serve important mental, emotional, and spiritual functions in our life journey. Our dreams help us to process and learn from our daily experiences, store memories and important information, master new skills, and manage our emotions. Dreams are also key to our inner guidance, spiritual expansion, karmic evolution, and soul growth. And some dreams are the key to healing trauma.
The first nine years of my life my family lived in a small town, until we moved to a much bigger and more bustling city. Soon after we settled in our new location, I began having the same dream repeatedly.
The content of the dream never wavered. I was back in our hometown, and I was standing frighteningly close to the edge of a large, deep lake. Then suddenly I was running away from a threatening bear chasing me. The intensity of this nightmare never changed, and I consistently woke up terrified.
Around the time I turned 14, it suddenly stopped, and I never experienced the dream again.
Years later, I researched the dream’s possible meaning. I then learned that water often represents emotion, while frequently dreaming about being chased is a sign of feeling stressed, anxious, worried, or fearful. In my dream, I was running away from the negative emotion, or trying to avoid it.
Left Holding The Bag
One of my clients recently said, “I’m the one left holding the bag.” Have you ever been ‘left holding the bag?’ This is when you are put in a situation where you are unfairly held responsible, because other people fail or refuse to take responsibility.
The expression “left holding the bag” originated in 18th-century Britain, but at the time it referred to a person being caught with stolen goods, while the rest of their criminal gang escape responsibility.
Many of us are left holding the bag at some point in our life. This is especially true for empaths, healers and highly sensitive people. They are often the scapegoat in their family, or the friend who is taken advantage of, or the coworker who has to pick up the pieces when others neglect their duties.
The solution for this is often found in spiritual self-empowerment, inner child healing, energy shielding, or simply the setting of boundaries. These are challenges I often assist clients with.
A client was about to purchase a bed and breakfast establishment with the support of an investor. When the day came to sign the papers, the investor decided it was just too much to deal with at the time. This left my client ‘holding the bag,’ having to find a new investor.
Another client was abandoned by her siblings when their mother’s mental and physical health suddenly began to deteriorate, and she was left to her own devices having to care for her mom with no assstance or support from the rest of the family.