choices
The Law Of Reverse Effect
I remember talking to a very distraught client a few years ago about a man with whom she had been having a secret affair for 24 years. It was a relationship she was very obsessed with and had stubbornly pursued for over two decades, despite many red flags and a great deal of frustration and disappointment along the way.
When this man finally got up the courage to divorce his wife, he left not only his wife, but also his mistress. Within three months, he was in a relationship with someone new and told my client that he never really felt that way about her anyway.
She wanted to know how this could be? She expected with 100% certainty that he would be with her and no one else after the divorce, but the exact opposite happened. After all, she had put a lot of time, effort, energy, love, and devotion into this secret relationship, not to mention all the stress, frustration and drama she had to endure for over two decades.
At the time, this tragic story made me think about some of the free will choices I have made in my own life. There have been times when I, too, have stubbornly expected things to turn out a certain way for me because I pursued it with vigor, only to be devastated when it did not. For example, many years ago, a guy I had a huge crush on and thought was really into me ended up hitting on my best friend while we were out on a date! I guess the moral of the story is to never pursue someone who is not really that into you.
The Constant Battle Of Head Versus Heart
Have you ever second-guessed yourself, done or said something that went against your gut, only to realize in retrospect that your initial feeling or hunch was right? Had you acted differently, it could have saved you a lot of heartache and loss, emotionally, physically or financially?
If you have ever been in this position, know that you are not alone. The “head versus heart” dilemma can be very confusing and frustrating. Many of my clients struggle with it and some experience a great deal of confusion, stress and emotional discomfort as a result.
When faced with difficult decisions or challenging situations, we usually have a good sense of what the best course of action might be. But then we tend to look for concrete evidence to support our feelings and intuitive hunches, and when we cannot find any, which is often the case, our heads take precedence over our hearts. So we end up discounting our feelings and intuitions, usually to our own detriment.
The struggle between head and heart is a common theme in philosophy, literature, art, and popular culture, as we all regularly experience inner conflicts between reason and emotion, logic and intuition, responsibility and passion.
Our Choices Are Ours To Make
The past few years have been challenging for everyone. The pandemic, political upheaval, and economic uncertainty have affected lives all over the world.
I have personally witnessed the pain and struggles of many people close to me, as well as my clients.
I even had to take a ‘mental vacation’ at times as I began to feel disoriented and somewhat confused by the messages the angels were giving me.
I asked the why’s with no clear answers. I’ve asked the how’s without sensible explanations. As a lightworker I tend to feel compelled to fix things, to make things better.
Then one day I had a breakthrough when spirit told me clearly that it is not my job to fix everything and everyone.
Spirit has led me to understand that my job is to spread love, light and healing to the best of my ability. How people choose to think, feel and act in response to their life challenges is not for me or anyone else to try to control. Everyone’s choices are theirs to make as they see fit, and with much choice comes much responsibility.
As heartbreaking and frustrating as it may be at times, it is not my place to interfere with other people’s karmic journey and soul plan. This newfound insight was jarringly confirmed by a traumatic event just a few weeks ago.
Spiritual Growth Without Judgment Or Guilt
I recently had a nasty fight with my ex-husband that was definitely not in line with the spiritual values and principles I teach my clients. Afterwards, I felt very defeated and disappointed in myself for not practicing what I preach.
But then Spirit whispered in my ear.
“It’s okay not to be perfect all the time. Sometimes you need to let the toxic air out of your human ego balloon.”
Upon further reflection, I was reminded that we are all spirit beings in human form, which automatically means we are limited and fallible. No one is perfect in this world.
After all, we have signed up for a very challenging physical adventure in this lifetime, which means we all have problems from time to time and we all make mistakes. That is how we learn and grow. In fact, one of the least spiritual things we can do is pretend we’re perfect.
Sometimes we need to let off steam by releasing pent-up negative energies that tend to build up in our auras as we navigate the ups and downs and many frustrations of our daily human existence. Yes, indeed, there are times when we need to go ahead and just beat the heck out of our ego piñata to get rid of some bad juju! When we release these unwanted energies, we detoxify our energy field to live a more abundant and fulfilling life.
The Exit Points In Our Soul Plan
I believe that we have access to several ‘exit points’ throughout our lives. These are moments when our spirit or soul can separate from its physical form to return to the non-physical. It is said that we are given a few such exit points in our lifetime.
Planet Earth is not our primary home. I like to think of our physical existence in this world as a challenging ‘schoolroom’. This physical life journey can be very difficult at times, and I find that it makes things a little easier if we can look at it from this perspective.
I have yet to meet a person who has had a complete fairytale existence in their life. We have all had some magical moments, but not necessarily as magical as some far-fetched novels or films might portray. Sometimes we feel like we’re banging our heads against the wall just to survive on a daily basis, physically, financially or emotionally, but deep down we all have a built-in survival instinct to stay and complete what we incarnated to do.
Exit points are moments when we have the free will choice to stay in this physical world or return to the non-physical. These moments of choice can be a major health emergency, a near fatal accident, a traumatic event in which we are exposed to extreme danger, and so on. It is usually one of those profound life experiences that make us feel very lucky to still be alive!
Learning To Trust Your Intuitions
As we navigate life’s challenges, we too often question our inner guidance. Even after decades of psychic work, I sometimes also find myself questioning my own choices and decisions. One of the ways we can move beyond the deceptions of the ego mind is to learn the signs of spirit and how spirit communicates with us.
Everyone has an inner psychic ‘dictionary.’ This inner glossary of personal spiritual symbols repeats signs and patterns to convey a message to you. Although you may not think of yourself as highly intuitive or as a psychic visionary, you may be surprised at how psychic you really are when you allow your higher self to guide you.
Most people who attend my intuitive development classes soon learn that they themselves already own the intuition they are seeking. What I mean by this is that what we try so hard to find in the outside world in order to become more intuitive is actually already present within us.
We are spirit and are merely occupying the physical vehicle that is our body. I am sure you have noticed that sometimes your body knows the truth about situations before it registers in your mind? This is a psychic ability.
Staying Connected To Spirit
If you are like me, I sometimes find it a struggle to disconnect from the ego in order to commune with spirit, Being spiritually aware and connected is a state of higher consciousness I prefer to spend as much time in as humanly possible.
Wouldn’t it be absolutely wonderful if we were always fully connected to spirit? Life is so much better and easier when my heart and mind are in the wonderful world of spirit.
Of course, it is not entirely practical or wise to always be in a higher state of consciousness, but one can certainly strive to spend more time living spiritually connected.
What I have learned to be extremely important is the practice of gratitude. Every day I try to consciously revel in all that is good and blessed in my life, instead of bringing myself down by focusing on what is wrong or lacking. We always have much more to be thankful for than we care to admit.
Another commitment I have made is to constantly remind myself that I am part of something greater than myself and connected to everyone and everything in the universe. This is not only a privilege, but also a responsibility. Regardless of how I feel on any given day, I am a spiritual being in human form who has the wonderful ability to choose the better side of myself and not let the ego take over.
I also know from experience that in order to stay spiritually connected, it is crucial for me to set aside some time each day for spiritual reflection, even if it is just a few minutes of meditation, to contemplate my purpose in this world, or ways I can be more compassionate, forgiving, or grateful.