self-control
How To Deal With Negativity And Toxic Drama
Many people today feel overwhelmed, angry, frustrated, fearful. This is especially evident online in the social media landscape. Unfortunately, too often this leads to attacks on others, including innocent people and companies.
It can be challenging to know how best to deal with all this toxic negativity. I believe it’s best to approach this issue spiritually, from a metaphysical or energetic standpoint.
Energy, whether positive or negative, grows when we feed it. Consider a plant: in order to thrive, it needs water, sunlight, and nutrients from the earth. If neglected, it will wither. The same principle applies to our interactions with the world around us: by paying attention to something, we feed it with our energy.
This is crucial to remember when dealing with any kind of negativity, both online and in person. To thrive energetically, we must be selective about who and what we pay attention to.
Huna, an ancient Hawaiian spiritual tradition, teaches that energy flows where attention goes. Every time we choose where to direct our energy, we’re making an active choice about what we want to grow in our lives. When we respond to negativity – whether with anger, defensiveness, or frustration – we end up reinforcing the very things we want to avoid. To maintain peace and harmony, huna advises focusing on positive intentions and constructive energy.
By giving toxic energy thieves our attention, we allow their negaivity to take root in our hearts and minds. Feeding negativity or drama only strengthens it, which ultimately affects our own well-being. When we consciously choose to withdraw our energy from negative influences and redirect it to uplifting and positive areas, we create an environment where peace and growth can flourish.
Thanks, Mom, For Teaching Me Love And Kindness
We all know people who have come in and out of our lives saying or doing just the right thing, at just the right time. People come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Some of these wonderful messengers and wayshowers may stay in our lives, or leave just as quickly as they came.
I have had several experiences with such earth angels. When I think of ‘earth angels,’ I think of one person in particular: my mother. She taught me many things that have helped me so much in my life. In particular she taught me the fruits of the spirit by applying them in her own life: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Children don’t do what adults say…they do what we do. Parents who are great role models and truly involved in their children’s lives raise kind adults, who in turn gift the same values to their own children. I was very fortunate to have a mother who didn’t leave me to fend for myself when I was growing up. She was very active in my life and taught me to be kind and courteous to everyone; to respect the elderly; and to always smile and be positive because we attract what we put out in the world.
My mother also made sure that we ate all our meals at the table until we left home as young adults. My husband pointed out once that when my mother calls us, she always asks how everyone is, not just me. She is very supportive and interested in how everyone is doing. I know a lot of people like her who would walk right up to you and give you a hug and ask you how you are.
Is Your Texting Pushing Him Away?
A new client recently contacted me about a promising romantic relationship. The first thing that became clear as I began to read for her was that she had a long history of dating men who seemed like potential long-term partners, but then suddenly disappeared or broke up with her after only a few months.
It quickly also became clear to me that texting was a significant factor in her dating problems. Misunderstandings due to texting have damaged the romantic, family, and friendship relationships of many people I have worked with as a psychic professional. This client was no exception.
As I read the energy around her situation, I sensed that she had a tendency to push men away by unnecessarily panicking when she did not feel completely in control. Guys can sense panic and controlling tendencies and for most men this is usually a big turnoff.
This kind of negative energy is also stressful and doesn’t improve the outcome of an uncertain situation. Excessive obsession, panic, and worry will not bring someone closer to you; in fact, it can push a potential long-term relationship away forever.
I then had to tell her that while I did see the potential for a long-term relationship in their connection, I didn’t currently see a long-term future for them if she continued with all the texting she was doing. I told her to take a step back, breathe, stop worrying so much, and definitely not try to resolve things through texting any more.
Empower Your Day With A 5-Minute Morning Routine
Navigating modern life can be daunting these days, especially when juggling a business or career, family responsibilities, social commitments and personal and spiritual self-care (if there is any time left for such a ‘luxury’).
Some days can feel like an endless climb, a never-ending hamster wheel. But I have learned that even the smallest adjustments in your lifestyle can invoke the most profound changes.
A spiritual self-care strategy that has worked wonders for me is my simple five-minute morning routine. It has transformed not only my personal life but also my psychic practice in ways I never imagined.
As a passionate artist and psychic professional, I often found myself feeling a little overwhelmed and scattered. Many of my mornings used to be chaotic and my energy was often all over the place, typically setting a stressful tone for the rest of my day.
I was desperate for a change. I needed a way to stay centered, focused and productive without adding more time demands and complexity to my already busy schedule.
Then it hit me: why not try a quick morning routine designed to centre and ground me, cleanse and shield my energy, and set positive intentions for the day ahead?
The morning is a particularly powerful time to practice such a routine, I thought. How we start our day obviously sets the tone for the hours that follow. A positive, focused start, empowered by a mindful soul connection to Spirit and the Divine, can only set the stage for an empowering and fulfilling day, while a chaotic, disconnected start only leads to stress, inefficiency and negativity. So, I decided to give it a go and have not looked back since.
Spiritual Maturity Is A Lifelong Journey
What does spiritual maturity mean to you? Every time I ask someone this question, I get all kinds of different answers.
A Baby Boomer I asked said it meant going to church, donating to charities, studying the Bible, and following the Ten Commandments.
When I asked a Gen Z client, she said it meant minding your own business and not caring what others think of you because it is none of your business what they think. She also said she was a Wiccan and didn’t believe in wishing negative energy on others, because she knew it would only come back to her if she did.
I recently asked four people at a social gathering, and they had different opinions on the subject. They were in their 30s and 40s and had a young teenager with them. Interestingly, one thing they all agreed on was that it is spiritually mature to create healthy boundaries with family and friends for your own mental and spiritual well-being. One woman shared, for exxample, that if she hadn’t stopped hanging out with one of her friends, she would have hit rock bottom emotionally.
“I just could not put up with the way she treated me. I used to spend a lot of time stressing about the things she would say and do. I was always overthinking every toxic interaction with her, and our so-called friendship was not good for my mental state,” she explained. “So, for me, spiritual maturity is walking away from those who bring you down.”
Your Divine Duty To Not Be A Goofus!
Why are some people so rude, unkind, emotionally immature, foolish? Are we not all spirit beings in human form who should know better? I recently asked my wise grandmother in spirit this question. As one of my ancestral guides, I always turn to her for help in dealing with complex life issues.
The person who inspired my recent spiritual inquiry is a very problematic, mean-spirited neighbor who I have seen and heard verbally abuse people, as well as his own dog, in ways that would infuriate anyone.
This man seems to enjoy verbal abuse as a means of self-aggrandizement and is very immature and unkind. I have also seen him damage a security camera after being asked to stop his dog from relieving himself on the steps of the building where we live.
I connected with my grandmother during my morning meditation and asked her why some people are so disrespectful and unkind. Her answer seemed strange at first because she showed me a mental image of Highlights, the children’s magazine she used to subscribe to for me when I was a child. It is a well-known kids’ magazine full of fun, educational stories, games, puzzles, and crafts that has been around for decades.
Embrace Your Personal Power In Relationships
Our relationships have great power and influence in our lives. In particular, many of us spend countless hours pursuing love and romance. Then, once we are in a relationship, we spend even more time and energy thinking about it, confiding in friends about it…often trying to make the relationship different or better.
I deal with this almost daily as I have counseled hundreds of lovesick, frustrated, and heartbroken clients over the years.
“If only he would do what I want, things would be different,” some of my clients might say. “If only he would be more open and honest, maybe I could trust him more.” Truth be told, I have heard similar words come out of my own mouth about my own relationships more times than I care to admit!
Unfortunately, instead of successfully influencing our partner’s words or behavior, we are often left feeling disappointed, betrayed, frustrated, powerless, or out of control. It is draining, pointless, and definitely not the best use of one’s time and energy.
So how do we change it? How do we take emotional control of our life and our relationships? The answer is shockingly simple.
It is all about taking a different, broader perspective on relationships and what they are here to teach us. A quote from Unity Church’s Daily Word magazine perfectly captures this shift in perspective: “Through our relationships with one another, we express the power, presence and love of God.”