self-control
A Sincere Apology Is Good For The Soul
One of the most difficult things in life is knowing when to apologize. It is obvious in some situations, but in others not so much. There are times when we need to weigh out all our options. Is the situation worth an apology, even if you are not the one who created a problem?
Knowing the right time to apologize is critical to the resolution. Was it done intentionally, or was it unintentional? Did the action cause others stress, worry, or pain?
You must also ask yourself if you can live without apologizing the rest of your life. Is it worth losing a friendship, leaving a group, resigning from a job, or not speaking to a family member ever again?
The good old Golden Rule can always come in handy in this dilemma. If you have done something that you would not want done to you, then apologize and seek atonement! Many people find it almost impossible to apologize. They struggle to acknowledge their own part in an argument or wrongdoing.
Some just do not seem to understand their actions were unacceptable, or they always feel that the world is out to get them. There is no compromise in their mind. They always try to twist every situation to make it seem like it is another person’s fault.
For some people, on the other hand, an apology seems to roll off their tongue a little too easily. When a sincere apology is made it must be followed by actions. Actions speak louder than words. By not repeating the offense, for example, it shows a true and sincere apology.
Sometimes all the other person needs to hear is a sincere, “I am sorry.” When we accept responsibility for our actions, we tell others we are sorry for hurting them. It is not always easy, but releasing guilt always is good for the soul.
True Love Has No Time Limit Or Deadline
We live in a busy world where most of us have gotten used to a very hurried life. Everything is on a strict schedule and time limit, because we now judge everything this way. We have become a restless society demanding instant solutions and immediate gratification in all things.
If the line is too long at the supermarket or fast food restaurant, some of us get upset. If we have to wait for our doctor when we have an appointment, we become annoyed. Some cut in front of others, or even cross streets while the light is still red, because they hate to wait.
Similarly, if we do not get an immediate reaction from our latest love interest, some of us do not become just a little restless or anxious. No, they get really upset!
If this kind of hurried, rushed way of life plagues you, then you may definitely need an major attitude adjustment. Because your naturally loving heart and your capacity for love and romance may be in serious trouble.
Maybe your heart never got the memo that there was no need to constantly hurry up and adhere to time limits and deadlines. What happened to dating? Romantic chats? Patiently anticipated expressions of affection? Dozens of love letters, and more recently emails and test messages? The joint holidays and weekends away? The looking forward to new adventures together?
What happened? What happened to living wholeheartedly in the moment? What happened to just enjoying the ride without constantly watching the calendar or the clock?
The one joy that we all desire and cherish is being loved and feeling special in someone’s eyes. To be affirmed, to be accepted and appreciated, to belong. It gives us an inner peace and happiness that cannot be found in any other way. Love and belonging is a fundamental necessity in everyone’s life. No matter how busy you are. Continue reading
Think Before You Speak Or Act
Sometimes, it is wise to move with caution and think things through slowly, so that we truly know what the best decision would be. This is especially true if you are one of those sensitive people who tend to be a ‘people-pleaser.’
Like the game of chess, it is smart to plan ahead and consider your options carefully. You don’t want to make a quick move, without clearly looking at what all the possible outcomes could be. We sometimes tend to make snap decisions to accommodate the needs of others, only to regret it later when we discover that it was a really bad move!
For example, if someone is asking you to do something for them or become involved in their project, and you just don’t know if you should commit yourself, you should say to that person: “You know, I’m so busy right now, I need a little time to think about it. I will get back to you on that as soon as I can.”
This way you do not have to walk away feeling you have let someone down, or harbor guilt or regret. You then take the time you need to simply think it through. Have a look at your calendar, make a few calls and decide how you really feel about this request or offer.
I believe this is one of the best pieces of advice I have ever been given: think through what you say and do, before you say and do it. Always consider if it is going to have a positive effect on your life and those around you. Never do anything that does not serve your highest good. It goes back to the ‘domino effect’ or the Law of Cause and Effect.
Keeping Your Cool In These Stressful Times
This is a stressful time, but my feeling is the Covid-19 pandemic has happened in our world for a reason. It is has been making us take a real long look at what is most important in life. It has been teaching us to not take our daily lives and our loved ones for granted.
The situation has been causing tremendous stress for many of us and has been challenging many relationships. And some of us are dealing better with it than others. If you have been struggling too, then there are some simple self-care strategies that could be helpful if you are feeling overwhelmed by a situation at home.
Start by holding some space for yourself, by carving out some time to just be by yourself, even it is just an hour. Use this time to do whatever makes you happy. If it means doing absolutely nothing, that is fine too! Having some ‘alone time’ helps to declutter your mind, improve your mood and restore your sense of self. If you cannot find peace at home, then go for a walk, or just go get cup of coffee somewhere nearby.
Meditation or quiet contemplation is a wonderful tool to gain a sense of calm and clarity. Take a moment to reflect on whatever may be bothering you, and try to gain a new perspective on the situation. There are always more than one side to a situation, and many tensions and conflicts can be resolved with cool heads and calm discussions.